Hello

Over the next week, I saw James multiple times. I asked Kris to see if it was okay if I visited his friend, and Kris had said that James was beyond ecstatic at the idea.

I liked James, especially now that he liked me too. He was really enjoyable to be around when he got used to you, and I found myself wanting nothing more than to help him get back to who he used to be. I knew he missed that person.

On my fourth or fifth visit, just before I went to lunch with Kris - I hadn't seen him in 6 days, since he had been away on road games - James spoke up with a question that surprised me.

"Has he made a move yet?"

I turned to look at him, my eyes breaking away from Mario Kart on James' tv screen. I nearly dropped the controller and he noticed, smirking as he paused the game,

"Pardon?" I squeaked.

James rolled his eyes. "Kris. Has he made a move on you yet?"

It took me a moment to fully digest the question, even after hearing it for the second time. I turned back to the TV, staring at it blankly while I thought. "Um," I scratched my head. "We've gone to lots of places together. Last week, the night I met you actually... We went to this park and he..." I found myself blushing.

He held my hand.

It sounded really lame and insignificant now that I really thought about it.

"He what?"

 I turned towards James. I had forgotten for a second that he was there. He raised his eyebrow at me and I cleared my throat.

"He held my hand," I mumbled.

James' face lit up. He grinned. "That's so cute!" I swear he squealed.

I blushed even harder. "It's just hand holding. You know how friendly you French people are."

James burst into laughter, and I stared at him blankly. "You're serious," he said in awe. I nodded, feeling stupid. James shook his head and patted my knee. I glanced down at his hand before looking back up at him when he spoke. "Livia," he said gently. All traces of humor were gone from his voice. "I guarantee that Kris holding your hand meant more to him than you seem to think." He grinned and removed his hand. "We are friendly," he said proudly. I rolled my eyes. "But I know Kris, and I know that hand holding from him is not a small thing."

I chewed the inside of my lip, thinking over what James had just said. I knew Kris too, and I knew he wouldn't just hold someones hand for no reason. I had felt the butterflies from that simple gesture. Had he?

"I guess you're right," I sighed. "But I need him to tell me, James. I just can't hope he feels something towards me and assume things... That just doesn't work well for me."

James stared at me curiously for a moment. "That's fair. But I have a feeling Kris is going to tell you - or show you, rather - how he feels sometime soon. And there will be no questions."

I narrowed my eyes at him. He simply grinned and looked at his watch. "Look! Time to go meet Kris. Have fun!"

---

"Are you okay?"

I snapped my head up as Kris' voice flooded through my ears. I stared into his eyes for a moment, replaying his question over and over until it finally registered. I blinked rapidly a few times, shaking my head. He looked so concerned that it sent a whole new flock of butterflies through my stomach. I had been spaced out, thinking about what James had said. It was even harder to focus on having a conversation with Kris when he was the reason I was nervous in the first place.

"I'm good," I replied, giving him a weak smile. I looked back down at my plate and pushed some lettuce around with my fork. I wasn't very hungry.

"Are you sure?"

I nodded, refusing to meet Kris' eyes. It was silent for a moment. I wanted him so badly to just tell me how he felt; if he felt anything, like James had said. I was deep in thought about my conversation with James when I felt a large hand cover mine, stopping my nervous movement. Kris thumb caressed my hand and I slowly lifted my eyes to meet his.

"There's something wrong, Livia. I can tell," he said. "And I want to help if I can."

I chewed the inside of my cheek, gently pulling my hand out from under his. He looked hurt for a moment, but it passed as quickly as it appeared. I tucked a piece of hair behind my ears, inhaling and releasing a deep breath. "Can we just go for a walk or something? I need fresh air."

Kris stared at me for a moment before nodding slowly and motioning for the waitress. We grabbed our jackets and headed outside.

The street the little diner was on was quaint and cute. The buildings were close together and it was decorated with Christmas lights in honor of the upcoming holiday. I refused to look at Kris as we walked. A chill hit me and I wrapped my scarf around my neck, shivering and hugging my arms tighter around myself. I felt Kris' arm wrap around my waist and grip my side. That was all it took; I broke. I stopped walking and turned to face the man beside me, who's face was now solemn as I gently pushed his hand away.

"I can't just do this with you when I don't know if it means anything." 

Kris frowned and his large hand covered the bottom of his face for a moment as he rubbed it gently. He looked down at me and sighed. "I thought it meant something."

I widened my eyes and stared at him before letting out an exasperated sigh. "Kris," I said, trying to calm my crazy girl emotions. "You can't just make me guess how you feel."

This time, it was Kris that stared at me. "I assumed holding hands and holding you were ways of showing that I care about you." His tone was oddly even, like he was trying not to get mad.

I sighed, tugging at the ends of my scarf. "Sometimes actions don't mean anything more than friendship."

Kris snorted, startling me. He took a step closer and lowered his voice. "How many guys do you hold hands with, Livia?"

I was taken aback by his question. "Um, only you, but..."

Kris shook his head. "No buts. You're thinking way too much about this."

I inhaled a sharp breath, letting it out alongside a slew of words. "I have to think, Kris," I spat. "I don't need to be walked on by anybody. I like to know things straight up, and the only reason I can think of that you wouldn't want to just tell me how you feel is because you don't know, or because you were just planning on getting something from me before leaving."

Kris muttered something in French under his breath and tugged his hands through his hair. "Livia," he said frustratedly, stepping away from me. "I thought we had gotten to know each other better than that."

I shrugged, crossing my arms and staring at the ground. "Sometimes people pretend."

Kris let out a bitter laugh and I looked at him. "I don't know if you're pretending to be somebody else, but I know I'm not." He shook his head before meeting my eyes. The look in them sent something rolling through my stomach, and my breath caught in my throat. I felt tears surfacing and swallowed to keep them away. 

This wasn't fair. I knew that. I knew he had been real with me. Yet, as he turned to walk away, all I could do was stare at the ground, my brain not connecting with my mouth. I wanted so badly to tell him to turn around, to come back, to tell him that all I had wanted from that outburst was to get our feelings for one another on the table. 

It was too bad I had already yanked the table cloth away.