Illegal Love.

After what felt like hours of driving, even though it was, I finally made it to our childhood home. Moms car was in the driveway, along with another mysterious black car. Who could this be? A doctor? Whatever, it doesn't matter right now. Dads car wasn't in the drive way. Lucky him.

I just out of my car, not bothering to grab a single thing from my car. I run to the door and turn the knob. It's locked. I slam on the door again and again. I see a face in the small window on the door. Who is that? I don't recognize those eyes. The door opens while I tap my foot impatently.

"Move!" I yell at a boy I don't recognize. His eyes are red and puffy. Who the hell is he? Doesn't matter. I run up the stairs, right into my mother who's walking out of his room. She jumps and looks up at me. Worriedly, I grab her arms and look up into her eyes. They're red and puffy, fresh tears still pooring out slowly.

"Mom, is he okay?" I ask. She puts her face in her hands and sobs, putting her chin on my shoulder. "Mom, is he okay? Please, tell me!" She just sobs out a strangled. 'He wont wake up!'

I feel all the heat leave my body. I feel stiff, my heart feels heavy. Does this mean he's- No he can't be dead. He has to be alive and well. Happy and carefree. His innocence that surrounds him that he carries on to other people, he must give that to me. He has to say 'oh cheese!' instead of 'oh shit.' He has to be okay.

I let go of my mother and push her lightly towards the mystery boy. Could this be Alexis' boyfriend? I always knew he was gay but I never thought he'd start dating. He's way to innocent for that. I swear to got, if that boy touched my bug in anyway, I'll murder him. Even though my mind is angry, my heart is still heavy. I don't say anything to the boy, yet.

I slowly reach my hand up to bugs door knob and open the painted lime green door. I look around. I don't want to look at the bed and see his condition. Instead, I walk over to his desk and sit in the chair. His computer monitor is on.

The backround is a picture of him and I smiling. It was a week before I left for school. I remember that day. It was mid summer and he woke me up in the morning. He made me walk with him on a blazing hot day to the ice cream shop. He got a huge ice cream sunday with rainbow sprinkles. The was the day he told me he was gay. I laughed when he blushed crimson. He thought I would hate him. Far from it. I told him I was bisexual that day too. He giggled and hugged me.

I turn away from the screen and look around. He has various posters on his neon orange walls. In a row, the posters go, My chemical romance, Black Veil Brides, Metallica, 30 Seconds to Mars, Panic at the Disco, Katy Perry, Paramore, Lady GaGa, Slipknot, Avenged Sevenfold, Never Shout Never, AFI and Rob Zombie. Quite an odd order. On his next wall, he painted in black, lyrics to all his favorite songs.

Hold your breath when the black bird flies..
I sit here and Smile dear..
Under your bed, in your closet, in your head..
I will never regret..
This is Holloween, this is holloween..
Baby your a firework..
You are the only exception..
Ro ma-romama-gaga-oh lala..
I still press your letters to my lips..
Sieze the day and I regret it, no time you lost..
Always the new kid, never the cool kid..
Kiss my eyes and lay me to sleep..
Mars needs woman, angry red woman..

I smile at the lyrics. All of the songs I know so well, because of Alexis. His carpet is soft and black. His TV is shoved in the corner ontop of a cabnet. He keeps his drawings in there. I've never been allowed to look at them. I wonder..

Walking to the cabnet, I open its hard wood door and pull out the sketch book. I sit cross legged on the floor and open the book. Gasping, I run my fingers over the perfect drawing. It's me. It's so beautiful. He got ever detail perfect, down the the light green spots in my eyes. It's.. beautiful.

"No." A weak voice whispers. I drop the book and jump up, walking over to Alexis.

"Hey, bug, you okay?" I ask him softly, resting my hand on the side of his face. His eyes close again and he groans, falling back into a deep sleep. I crawl into his bed beside him after kicking my shoes off. He doesn't move. Usually he'll curl into me and sigh softly. Not this time. He just lays there, a sad smile on his features.