World So Cold

“And so I ended up being a blood whore,” I said. “It was like that for months, even though while there it seemed eternity. I was given just enough food to keep me alive, nothing more. Men and women alike came to visit me, although the women were better.”

“They weren’t as brutal,” said Stefan nodding.

“Hardly,” I said giving a short laugh. “They just didn’t try to rape me in the process. Except for that one time,” I said. I could see the hardened gaze in both Stefan and Damon neither of them clearly happy.

“And that’s why I’m on the run. Why I’m still running, hiding. Because people only want me for one thing. My blood. And I have no intention of giving it to them.”

“Why Catherina?” asked Damon.

“Well, he wasn’t going to rent me out as Juliet. Catherina means pure in Italian. Pure like my blood, I guess.” I shrugged trying to remain and seem neutral, unaffected. I knew it was pointless. They could probably feel my sadness fill the room.

“But it doesn’t even end there…”

I was laying in the darkness, trying to fall asleep, when I heard a loud crash from upstairs. I sat up wondering what could be going on. Occasionally a vampire would want to get my blood without Richard’s consent. Or they’d get so addicted that they’d try and feed from me the next day as the Power would begin to fade.

Richard wouldn’t allow it. He wanted to keep my blood all to himself. And he couldn’t allow someone more powerful to exist. All the Power, my Power belonged to him. At least in his eyes. So I didn’t think much of it. But when I heard another crash, followed by another I knew something was up.

Then the basement door burst open. Hurried footsteps came down the stairs and Charlotte came running towards me, a bag in her hands. “Juliet, you must leave now.” She gave no other explanation and then pulled me from the bed. I followed her as she explained more.

“Richard is preoccupied. Many have come to claim you. They find it unfair that Richard is keeping you to himself. They want him to share, without having to pay.” As we came to the top of the stairs I heard another large crash and some glass shattering. It was off in some room that I couldn’t see.

“Quick,” said Charlotte giving me no time to pause. She pulled me towards the door and then thrust a bag into my arms. “Get as far away as you can,” she said glancing over her shoulder. “There isn’t much time.” Richard was powerful. Powerful enough that he could win. Even if he didn’t I’d still be taken.

“What about you?” I asked. “You can’t stay here.”

“I’ll be okay,” she said. “But you have to go, now.” She pushed me out the door and then shut it. I didn’t take any more time in running away and down the streets, through the alleys. Anything to get as far from that house as I could.

“Just like that?” asked Damon. “You were free, just like that?” He snapped his fingers for emphasis.

“Just like that,” I agreed. “And I was free, for a time, only for a couple months. Then I was discovered again. This time by a man named Edward. He also took my blood, but he wasn’t as smart or controlled.”

He pulled back his lips stained crimson with my blood. I could feel that he took a lot. Much more than normal, too much. My pulse was weakening as my heart struggled to pump the dwindling supply of blood.

As I struggled to breathe Edward sighed and then bit his wrist. He pushed it up against my mouth forcing me to swallow his blood. I gulped at it hungrily knowing it would heal me and give me strength.

When I had enough Edward pulled away before leaving me lying on the floor of the room. He figured I was too weak to go anywhere or do anything. But he didn’t realize how quickly my body would heal.

It was as I was lying there, trying to steady my breathing that I saw it. It was just a glint, a catch of the sun on some metal. As I focused in on it I saw that it was sharp, a knife. The thought barely even crossed my mind before I began pulling myself towards it.

I healed quickly, but not that quick. Once I got to it, my shaky hand reached up and grabbed it off the table. I sat myself up in a sitting position, leaning on a chair. Gripping the knife in two hands managed to stop the shaking.

Tears began falling down my face as I knew what was going to happen. My mind was screaming, Not again! But deeper than that was the fact that I couldn’t go through this anymore. I refused to be used for Power, refused to be used for blood.

I was not a blood whore!

Taking a deep breath, I plunged the knife into my stomach. Instantly I felt the blood the gush to the surface. I pulled the knife out with weak hands. It was covered in my blood. I let it drop to the floor as I waited for death to come. And as my eyes closed, maybe for good, I knew this was it.

“You killed yourself?” said Stefan looking at me with sad, wide eyes. I could hear the pity in his voice. That’s the last thing I wanted.

“Better than the alternative,” I said, my voice hard. I never wanted pity. I was always the strong person to overcome their fears, overcome what made others cringe. I never followed the rules and I planned on it staying that way.

“What about Edward and Richard?” asked Damon.

“I don’t know,” I admitted. “They could still be alive, they could be dead. I have no idea. Once I woke up as a vampire, I ran and never looked back.”

“So why are you spending all this time here?” asked Damon. “Why aren’t you still running?” I felt my gaze become icy and the room itself go down a few degrees. My heart, which was once open, now frosted over again.

“Because up until recently, have you seen anyone attack me? Have you sensed any threats? I was safe here. No one tried to hurt me. But now… Now I guess I might be leaving.” I shrugged like it didn’t affect me. I knew I’d miss Stefan though. And Damon, my heart said, betraying me.

“Juliet, you don’t have to leave,” said Stefan gently. “I meant what I said before. We would protect you, keep you safe.”

“I can’t ask that of you,” I cried. It wasn’t fair to them to keep me safe. It wasn’t right. I can do it. I should be able to do it on my own.

“You don’t seem to be doing a very good job recently,” said Damon with a smirk on his face. A smirk I wanted to just slap right off.

“Neither of you can decide for me!” I shouted standing up. “I control what happens to me! No one else!” I looked at them, challenging them to tell me what to do, to decide for me.

“Juliet, why won’t you let us help you?” asked Stefan. “We want to help.” He spoke calmly as if talking to an animal about to attack.

“Weren’t you listening?” I hissed. “For three hundred years it has always been me. And even before that, you left me. There’s only one person I can depend on and that’s me.”

“You shouldn’t refuse our help,” chastised Damon. He lounged in his seat seeming unaffected by my outburst. “It isn’t the smart thing to do. And you do like being alive, don’t you?” I wasn’t sure what he was implying, that I would die without their help, or if I refused it I would die. Either way I didn’t like it.

I huffed crossing my arms. There was no way I was going to like accepting help. I liked doing things on my own, being independent. I made my own rules. It was always me, myself, and I. There was never anyone else there for me and I doubt they would be now.

“And I’m sure if it came down to it, you’d screw me over again. You’d leave me again to deal with it. Why not just save me the heartache and let me do it?”

“Because,” said Damon, dragging out the word, “if we leave you to your own devices who knows what you’ll do. And you know the smart thing to do is accept our help.” He stood up so that he was eye level with me. As always I was caught by those black eyes that seemed to pull me in. “Not because you like us, not because you need it, but because it’d make your life easier and safer. Isn’t that what this is all about?”

“But both of you can’t protect me. Stefan has school and Elena and trying not to get arrested. You have…probably better things to do,” I said. I wasn’t sure what Damon did in his spare time. Probably plan how to make Stefan’s life more miserable.

“Exactly,” said Damon. “Stefan can protect you during school and I can protect you the other times.”

“But that means I’d have to actually spend time with you,” I said in obvious distaste. I admit my voice was a bit whiny too.

“I’m afraid so, Princess,” he said flashing one of those perfectly gorgeous smile that left me blinded. “Now that that’s settled, I have places to be, things to destroy, people to kill.” With a wink he turned into a crow and flew out of the room through the trap door to the widow’s walk.