I Guess This Is Growing Up

She walked into the room hours later, and I had just gotten back there myself. “That was so awesome!” I shouted and threw my arms around her.

She grinned and hugged me back, “You really think so?” she asked pulling her bottom lip into her mouth. I looked at her as if she were crazy.

“Of course it was!” she smiled and then our boyfriends walked in the room, and I had just noticed the dark circles under her eyes. “Evan, have you been getting enough sleep?” I asked before the boys reached us. But before she could answer, Pierre walked over and placed a sloppy kiss on her lips, Evangeline making a face. The air was uncomfortable, and I knew that she and Zack were still attracted to each other. I could see it.

Paul wrapped his arm around me, “Good job, Evan. Now are you ready to party with us?”

“’Us’?” she asked and Pierre nodded, “Yeah. Those guys that you knew that we met in Subway, invited us out. To celebrate your line and their new C.D.”

She nodded slowly and then the four of us walked out. When we arrived at the club, Jack pulled me aside. Paul didn’t seem to mind, and it seemed like he and Alex picked up their conversation from before; Pierre included. Evan was standing off to the side, and Zack whispered something in her ear. She nodded, and followed him to the back and then I turned my attention to the Lebanese man pulling me away.

“So, you’re really with him?” he asked, and I couldn’t smell alcohol on his breath.

“Yeah. We’ve been together for a little over a year now.”

Jack looked at me like I was crazy, “But...” he trailed off and sighed, “I don’t understand.”

“What is there for you to understand? I have a boyfriend.”

“But...I thought that-”

“What did you think, Jack? That I would eventually come back to you? That I spent all of this time waiting for you?” I spat, feeling the color rush to my face.

He scratched the back of his neck and sighed, “I haven’t been with anyone since you.”

“You expect me to believe that?”

“Yeah. I’m not like the rumors. Neither are the other guys.”

“Rumors?” I said raising an eyebrow. He looked at me, clearly a shocked and a little hurt.

“You mean...you didn’t follow us at all?” I shook my head.

“No.” I stood, crossing my arms over my chest. I didn’t know what he wanted to get at, but I was hoping that he would get to it soon enough.

“But...Alex, Zack and Rian were your friends too.”

“I know. And I learned some of the important things from Kara and Lisa. But why would they tell me rumors? What would’ve been the point in that?”

Jack scratched the back of his neck again, “I don’t understand you anymore. You’re not the same girl that I-”

I couldn’t help but cut him off, “That you what? I’m not the same girl that you were friends with, that you kissed, that you slept with or whose heart you broke?” I paused, “Take your pick.” I could feel tears pricking the corners of my eyes and I bit my lip to stop them. “You expect me to be the same girl that you went to high school with?”

“I was kinda hoping you were. But I can see that-”

“Don’t assume things about me, Jack!” I said a little loudly, cutting him off again. “You have no right to cast judgment like that.”

“I’m not trying to, Amanda!” he said before I could cut him off again. “I just don’t know what to think, seeing the girl that I love in some other guy’s arms.”

“Well now you know how it feels.” I said bitterness in my voice. I couldn’t help it. “How it felt to see you with Ashli at prom. How it felt you see you pull up that time at Panera with her, ‘just in case.” I sighed and shook my head, “You just don’t get it, do you, Jack? We’re not the same people we were in high school. I’ve had to grow up, and you haven’t. Things will never be the same.”

“But they could! You could let me show you that I’m different.”

“No, Jack. You lost that right when you waited weeks to talk to me again. I’m happy with Paul, and it’s going to stay that way.”

And without another word, I turned around and walked back to the group, and Paul smiled down at me. “Babe, you okay?” I nodded and gave him a smile, and he pressed a kiss to my lips, “Good. Here, I got you water.”

I sipped from it, and saw Jack walk out of the club. I shook my head, and focused back on the group. Pierre and Alex were in a deep conversation, about overseas I figured. Evangeline was talking to someone, in French surprisingly. A few minutes later she walked over to me.

“Hey, are you ready to leave?” I asked and she nodded. “Yeah. I’m exhausted and still not used to the time change.” I nodded and we said goodbye to Alex, Zack and Rian.

Zack pulled aside and said something to Evangeline and she bit her lip, then nodded. He nodded and then she walked over to where Paul, Pierre and I were standing. As we walked out, Paul wrapped his arm around my waist and pressed a kiss to the top of my head, “Come back to my room tonight.” He said low in my ear.

I felt my cheeks flush, and bit my lip. “But-”

“Pierre wants to spend some alone time with Evangeline. And I want to spend some alone time with you.” I laughed and nodded, “Okay.”

We walked to my and Evangeline’s room, and I grabbed a set of clothes. I knew that she was going to sleep in tomorrow, and I knew that Paul would want to sight see. He had always said he wanted to walk around New York, and right now would be a good time. It wasn’t ungodly hot, but it wasn’t freezing either.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” I said to her, giving her a smile as Paul and I left. She looked up at me, nodded and then continued the typing she had been doing. She was wearing an old Tool shirt, a pair of sweats and her plastic black rimmed glasses. Pierre was laying behind her, one hand on her hip, the other holding his head up as he watched the T.V. screen.

I smiled slightly to myself as we walked down the hall and to the elevator. Paul carried my bag for me, and with his other hand grasped mine. I smiled at him and he leant down and kissed me as we walked out of the hotel and to the rental car he had. “Your friend, Alex, invited us to your Thanksgiving, but I wasn’t sure if that would be okay. Since it was going to be at your parent’s house and all.”

I smiled and nodded, “Yeah, that’s fine. It’s about time you met them anyway.” Paul grinned at me, his dark blue eyes sparkling which made my cheeks flush. His right hand found mine and his fingers laced with mine. Ten minutes later we arrived at the hotel that he and Pierre were staying at.

Later in the night, Paul and I were cuddling in the bed, ‘Can’t Hardly Wait’ was playing on the screen. I was wearing a tank top, and some sleep shorts; while Paul was wearing an old shirt and some sleep pants. Every so often Paul would laugh at me for saying the words along with the actors. “You’re so adorable.” He said, and then pressed a kiss to my lips. I blushed and pulled him back to me as soon as he pulled away.

As the kisses intensified, Paul turned off the T.V. and reached over to turn off the lamp. I smiled and ran my fingers under his shirt against his chest. His fingers found the hem of my shirt, and soon it was on the ground. His soon followed and then he pulled away. “One moment, love.”

I whined in my throat as he left me exposed in the sheets. He quickly returned and captured my lips again. He placed a box on the table next to me and I grinned in the kiss. His hands slid my sleep shorts off, along with my underwear. I slid my fingers under his sleep pants and pulled them off along with his boxers. We kissed for a while more and then he grabbed a foil square from the box on the table.

A few hours later, I woke up in Paul’s embrace. I smiled as I snuggled into his slightly muscled body. I sighed and then peeled his arms off of my body, and I pulled back on my p.j.’s. I took a room key and then walked down to the pool, and looked at the almost morning sky. I thought back to that prom night, and I bit my lip. Seeing Jack tonight messed with my head, and then hearing him say all of those things just confused me even more.

I hadn’t lied when I told him I knew of no rumors. I hadn’t listened when my co-workers had gossiped about them. I hadn’t listened when people I went to school with talked about them. I found solace in my obliviousness. I just didn’t want to think about how he may have actually been sleeping with other girls, just because I knew what his sex drive was like. I didn’t want to think that he was out living his life happily playing music, and that he might’ve moved on.

Or worse, gotten back with Ashli.

I bit my lip and shook my head, feeling slightly guilty for thinking about Jack like that when I had Paul. Paul who had never hurt me. Paul who had never taken me for granted. Paul who would visit me at work. Paul who wasn’t immature.

I got up and walked back to the room, and slipped back into the bed next to Paul. His arms wrapped around my waist and he pulled me to him. I loved his warmth and I sighed contently. “Where’d you go, Mandas?” he mumbled. I grinned, “I just sat outside for a bit. It’s nothing.” He nodded and I tilted my head up and pressed a kiss to his lips.

He kissed me back and then I snuggled into his chest. “Amanda, you’re amazin’.” I grinned and kissed his bare chest. “I think you’re pretty amazing yourself, Paul.”

He chuckled and squeezed me briefly. “Night, love.”

“Night.” And when I closed my eyes, I dreamt of nothing.