Angel, Put Me Back Together Again

So this is it; college life. I trudged down the long hall to my dorm room. Third floor of course. I was going to have to make multiple trips. I was at the end of the hall in room 300, Pacific Building, Beachside. How touristy of me. Not that I actually got to choose, but you get it. At least it was easy to remember. As I made my way to my room, I passed other students unloading their things and meeting up with friends that hadn’t seen all summer. I cringed and ducked my head a little lower. It was finally starting to settle in that I was all alone out here. It was up to me to make new friends and start over. I repressed the audible groan that threatened to escape me.

As I pushed the door open with my free hand, I saw that my roommate had already had all of her things set up and was currently out of the room. Part of me was grateful that I didn’t have to do my introductions just yet. Maybe I could get settled in first before I had to meet anyone. I dropped my bags on the bed and retreated back to the hall to get the rest in the lobby downstairs. As I walked back down the hall to the elevator, I saw a bunch of girls stepping off, their tanned bodies and extremely white teeth blinding me. They all had on some form of Victoria's Secret "Pink" line and short shorts. I realized that I had a pair of skinny jeans, my sparkly purple Toms and a Misfits shirt that Frank let me have after we started dating. Even if I'm trying to cut ties back home, I couldn't bring myself to get rid of this shirt.

I watched as they walked down the hall toward me, stretched from one wall to the other. I put my head down awkwardly, not wanting to talk or make eye contact. At the last minute I realized none of these girls had the intention of moving to let me through and I found myself pressed against the wall to let them pass. They laughed loudly about some joke and continued on past me, almost bumping into me. They didn't even look in my direction. I sighed and pushed off the wall, making my way back to the elevator.

"Fucking bitches..." I grumbled, running my hand through my hair as I reached out to press the down button.

"Excuse me?" Someone called from behind me. I turned around to see that one of them had come back down the hall for something. My eyes widened a little and I pressed the down button harder this time. "Were you talking about us?" She asked as she started to walk towards me.

"Oh for fucks sake..." I looked at the elevator, wondering why it was taking so long. As she was just a few steps from me, I thought quickly and slipped my hand into my pocket, pulling out my phone.

"Hey, I'm talking to--"

"Gotta go, bye." I shook the hair out from behind my ear and pretended to hang up my phone. I turned to look at her and looked at my phone confused. "I'm sorry, were you talking to me?" I acted completely clueless.

"I just thought you said something to me." She gave me a questioning look. I looked at my phone and back up to her and laughed.

"Oh... Sorry. Bluetooth." I motioned to my ear furthest from her that was covered by my hair. She looked me up and down before smirking.

"My mistake." She strutted off back towards her friends. Just as she walked away, the elevator doors slid open.

"Just in time..." I mumbled once more as I stepped on, hitting the ground button. As I stepped off the elevators onto the main floor, I glanced around at all the students rushing past. Some carrying bags to their dorms, some on their cell phones, some were in groups. What I did notice was that they all looked the same. Not like, clones, but something about them seemed so uniform. I glanced down at my outfit and looked back to every other girl I saw. I stuck out like a sore thumb, and to be honest I'm kind of dying in these jeans. It's not super hot here, but it is pretty freaking humid. I realized then that I was going to have a hard time fitting in with these people. I moved away to get new friends, and right now it's looking a little grim.

I picked up my last few bags and got back on the elevator. As I reached the third floor and made my way back to my room, I was confused when I saw the door propped open. I swore I shut it on my way out. I walked up to it with caution and poked my head in. I felt my heart sink when I scanned the room.

"Oh... so you're my roommate. Well ... hi, I guess."

"Hi..." I shuffled into the room, throwing the last two bags next to my bed. I took a moment, before taking a deep breath and turning around with a smile plastered on my face. "Sorry about the confusion in the hallway earlier."

"It's cool. It was my mistake." She stood up from the bed and studied me awkwardly before smiling and extending her hand. "I'm Charleen. My friends call me Char."

"Angela. Nice to meet you, Char."

"Charleen. I said my friends call me Char..." The look on her face was dead serious. I tried my best not to laugh or break her jaw. I wasn't sure which would happen first. Instead I smirked and nodded my head.

"Right then. I'm just going to unpack my shit if you don't mind."

"Go for it." She plopped back down on her bed and began flipping through her phone. I began putting my clothes in the closet when I heard her shift on the bed behind me and clear her throat. I stopped and looked over my shoulder.

"Yes?"

"You have a funny accent."

"Umm... thank you?" I wasn't really sure how to respond to that.

"I mean... where are you from?"

"New Jersey."

"Oh..." She said with a little too much of something else behind it. I cocked my eyebrow and turned around to face her fully.

"'Oh', what?"

"Nothing. It's just, I've heard stuff about New Jersey." She said it like it was a dirty word. I felt myself get in defense mode. Just because I'm not happy with what I left behind doesn't mean I won't defend it.

"Have you ever been to Jersey?" I asked, putting my weight on one leg, crossing my arms.

"No, but--"

"Then you heard wrong." I cut her off. She stood up from her bed again and mimicked my actions, leaning on one foot and crossing her arms. I sighed and rolled my eyes. "We're not going to get along are we?"

"I guess not." She said matter-of-factly. We stood holding each others gaze for a moment before she finally broke the tension. "I'm going to leave now. Don't touch my shit or we'll have problems. You know, I'm not sure if I can trust you Jersey girls." With that she left my alone to unpack once more. When she was out of the room and the door latched behind her, I groaned and flopped down on my bed. I looked over at her side of the room then began scanning my own things. Everything she had was bright and happy. She had a lot of pictures on the wall around her bed of her and her friends. Some of them I recognized as the girls in the hall. Everything of hers seemed crisp and new.

My stuff was they same stuff I've always had. Nothing too new. The pictures I had brought to hang up even seemed darker compared to hers. I'm not usually one to label or judge or whatever, but we really were polar opposites in every way as far as I could tell. I sat up and began digging through my bags until I found the album with all the pictures and drawings I had brought. There were several pictures of me and the guys. Despite how I felt currently, I had packed these before my run in with Frank so there were even some of me and him. I wasn't sure if I wanted to hang those or not. Then I pulled out the one picture I had framed. It was the song Gerard and I had wrote together. The original with the silhouette of the guy hanging by his feet. I smiled weakly as I ran my hand lightly over the glass. I felt my heart start to twist painfully as I thought about the guys. I thought I had made the right choice by getting out of Jersey, but the longer I sat here, the more I realized I might have just screwed up royally. I sighed heavily as I sat the picture frame gently on the bed. I stood up and went back to unpacking. I needed something to distract me, especially since Charleen is gone for the time being. This is going to be one hell of a semester.