I Need Him, My Gerard

Over the next few weeks I made an extra effort to talk to Gerard. I think he noticed, and is trying to make an effort with me as well. Mikey is allowing us to get closer, because he is kind of feeling guilty about leaving. He shouldn’t though; I’m looking forward to spending the summer with Gerard. We haven’t told Mikey, but we’ve been making plans for the summer. I’ve never had a girlfriend, and secretly, I think I prefer Gerard to girls. I’m NOT gay, because it’s just Gerard. It might just be that I look up to him, but I’m not sure. All I know is that I prefer spending time with Gerard.
Mikey hasn’t noticed anything yet, he’s too excited about camp. I don’t know how he’s going to survive all the sports; Gerard and I have private conversations about that when Mikey isn’t around. What I’m most worried about is my schoolwork. Yeah I know, I never thought I’d say that. Instead of concentrating in lessons, I actually draw pictures of me and Gerard, and writing his name out over and over. As long as no one sees it, especially Mikey. I’m not sure if I’d mind Gerard seeing it. I think he’d just laugh it off, but, secretly I would love for him to take it differently. Man that sounds weird.

“Frankie, someone’s here to see you.” Mum called up to me. A visitor? I don’t have enough friends to have visitors, and if it was the cops my mum would have screamed it.

“Coming mum.”
I got up, slamming down the stairs, slightly eagerly. At the bottom of the stairs stood Gerard, slightly awkwardly. He didn’t fit in, all in black against our bright floral walls. I grinned at him, and he grinned back. The tension in his face relaxed when he saw me, and he smirked, looking me up and down. I looked down, puzzled and turned bright red as I saw I was in a vest and boxers saying “kiss me” across them.

“Nice underwear,” he said.

“Crap. Erm, be right back”
I stuttered, turning and racing back to my room. I threw on a pair of jeans and a shirt hurriedly, not wanting Gerard to leave. I ran back downstairs.

“What do you want then?” I asked.

“Just want to hang out for a bit, are you busy?”

“No, come on up.” he followed me up the narrow stairway. As I went into my room, I kicked my clothes into corners, not wanting him to see my dirty underwear. I was about to tell him to make himself at home but as I turned around; he was already slouched on my bed, nuzzling into my pillow. It was weird, but I was glad he felt that comfortable in my room.
“What’s all this?” He asked, scooping some sketches off my floor.
My face burned scarlet. He had picked up the comic strip I had been working on. I stumbled over, but I was too late, he had already read the first strip. Just to make me feel extra bad he read the title out to me, with a quizzical look on his face, and humour in his voice:
“The adventures of Gerard and Frank.”
He burst out laughing.
I felt my face flush. He must think I have a mental age of about five. I glance at him. He’s stopped laughing, and is looking at the strip, with a more serious look on his face.

“What now?”
I asked, assuming he’d found something he was puzzling over.

“Frankie, this is really good. I love how you’ve drawn me, I look super hot.”
He laughed, expecting me to laugh as well. Then I made a comment without thinking.
“You are super hot Gerard.”
After I said it, I thought he would get worried or distant, but he didn’t. I sat down next to him, and we went over my strips. We both admit I can” t draw and we should get Gerard to draw the strip, and me to write them. He seems really excited about it, and is calling it our new summer “project.” His eyes light up every time summer is mentioned, and it makes me happy inside to think it was me that did that. We have to hold off until Mikey goes away though, he is starting to think he’s loosing his best friend and his brother, and is getting a bit moody.
It’s been a long week. Mikey is leaving today. I went round to Gerard’s, funny how I say Gerard’s not Mikey’s, and said goodbye. Gerard was sadder today then I had ever seen him, so I kept my distance to give him extra time with Mikey. I could comfort him later.

“Goodbye Frankie, I’ll see you in two weeks. Look after Gerard whilst I’m gone.” he whispered that last bit, not wanting Gerard to hear and feel embarrassed.

“Don’t worry dude, you know I will. I’ll miss you, but two weeks isn’t that long, right?”

“Right,” he said, trying to sound cheerful, and putting on a brave, but shaky, face, before turning to Gerard. I saw Gerard’s face; he looked distraught, and took a hint. I left the room, so they could say goodbye in private.

Ten minutes later, Mikey is getting in the car. Gerard’s waving to him frantically, and I thought I saw a tear roll down his face, but when I went over, his cheek was dry.
I put my arm round him, even though he’s taller than me, but he put his head on my shoulder, and I felt him shaking as the car drove away.
For the next few days, we were very quiet, missing Mikey. But then things started to look up. I suggested we started on our summer “project” and his eyes did light up. He took my hand, pulling me off the sofa, and dragged me down the stairs into his room. Not that I needed a lot of dragging.

“So, are we going to change the name, because it’s a bit childish, you know,” I said, trying to sound like I don’t care about the name. He agreed, but he was nice about it.

“Well, we could make it more, comic style, like, erm… Jersey Heroes?”

“That’s not bad. You’re really clever Gerard.” I was actually impressed. Also, the comic book is really becoming OURS now. We came up with storylines. Over the next week we wrote and illustrated twelve issues of our special comic book. After we had finished, we decided to go out.
“What do you want to do?” I asked, because I was up for anything.

“Erm, drink in the park.” I laughed, and then looked at his face. He was serious.

“You’re serious, aren’t you” I asked.

“Yes, I trust you enough.” He was really serious.

“Dude, I’m fifteen. I’m too young to drink.”

“I’ll buy it, don’t worry, I won’t take advantage of you whilst you’re drunk, OK.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to. Alright, we’ll do the drunken thing today, and watch a girly movie and do each others hair tomorrow.”

“Ha ha ok.”