I Would Wait Forever

"Can you come over?" Her voice is soft as it rang through the phone. The sound of her silky smooth voice makes my heart ache.

"Sure," is my reply. Alexandrea d'Beau had been the only girl for me since the day I met her two years ago. I had been dumb at the time, seeing only the beauty of a girl. I met her in a book shop. She had been staring at books, this cute, lost look on her face. I didn't work there, I wasn’t even sure what she wanted. I didn’t know where anything was and I didn’t know how to find it but I still walked over to her, looking at her face as if I were trying to be polite and asked her if I could help.

"Yeah," she said, biting her pale pink lips. "I was wondering what would be a good book to get my dad. He's really into World War I. Do you think this would be a good book?" she asked. Her hair was long--to her shoulder blades-- and a deep brown color. Her bangs were covering some of her dark brown eyes. She had freckles sprinkled on her deep tan skin. She showed me some book, the long fingers of her hand wrapped carefully around the hard brown cover.

"That'd be fine," I said nodding. She smiled at me, her lips pulling away from straight, white teeth.

"Thanks so much." She said. "My name's Alexandrea," she introduced while holding out her hand.

"Martin," I replied, shaking her hand back.

"I like that name," she said. "You definitely fit a 'Martin'." I frowned and shook my head.

"What do you mean?" She gave a little laugh, a small giggle that was adorable and lovely, and shook her own head.

"Never mind,"

"Hey," I said. "Do you want to have dinner with me tonight?" She rose her eye brows, a smirk growing.

"Sure, Mr. Forward-Pants." She said as she walked towards the front. "I need to get changed though. I don’t think I look good enough for a dinner date with you." I shook my head.

"You look great," I said quickly. She blushed, the tan skin of her cheeks turning a bright pink.

"You're just saying that." I shook my head.

"No," I answered. "I've never seen a--" She had gone away from me, moving through the isles without my knowledge. I frowned and looked for her. She was a row ahead of me, looking at another book. "You're pretty fast," I told her.

"That's what she said," she said giggling while picking up another book. I shook my head and followed after her.

"What I was saying was that I've never--" Again she was out of my view. She was standing in line. I started forward. "I was say---" A woman got in my way as I tried to talk to her. "I was saying--" Another woman cut me off. "I've never seen a woman as beautiful as you." The women in line and the women at the cash register looked at me and I blushed. "I was t-t-talking to-to her," I said as I pointed to Alexandrea. She giggled a little and batted her eyelashes at me.

"It's not good to talk to strangers," she said as she looked my way.

"We're not strangers! I've known you for five minutes. That's being acquaintances." The women all cooed an "aw" and Alexandrea smiled.

"So what were you saying then? I didn’t hear you."

"I said you were beautiful."

"This is a lot of work for just a first date." She said. I frowned and walked over to her. "But it worked."

We were friends for a while. Just friends. Went on a couple more dates, talked for long hours. We moved into a phase where she'd spend time over my house. We were more than just friends; we were lovers. I loved her. I loved her from the first time I met her. The times we talked were merely logs to feed the flames. I absolutely adored her. She didn’t love me though. She tried to tell me she did but I knew she didn’t love me. She would go away for weeks at a time. She would call sporadically. She'd sleep with me one night and then in the morning I'd have to leave. I couldn’t tell her I loved her. She and I had an agreement that it'd just be casual. She wasn't ready to date and though I said I wasn’t, I was. I tried to find people but I couldn’t stop myself from wanting her. She'd call when I was with a woman and I would leave her to see my Alexandrea.

I loved her.

She loved how she felt with me.

"I'll be right over," I tell her as I get up from my couch. Her smile is clear through the phone.

"I'll be waiting, Martin."

"Alexandrea?" I say into the phone, stopping to listen to her voice.

"Yeah?" she asks.

"I love you." She laughs a little; a soft laugh that makes my heart ache.

"I love you too, Martin. The door will be open for you. I left you some food if you're hungry." I nod and sigh softly.

"I'll be there in a sec."

We are either friends, lovers or we were nothing. I want to be with her so I take any thing she gives. I would wait for her but I think she knows just as well as I do that there is no chance she'll ever be mine.