Status: writing
Why Am I So Scared Of This?
Basketball Games
I wake up at 8 am to pebbles being thrown at my window. let me repeat 8 in the morning, on a Saturday. I grumble and roll over. I refuse to get up this early. Ping.Ping. Ping.
One tiny pebble after another. I pull my pillow over my head and my breath warms the bed that's way to close to my face for comfort.
The pebbles stop and I think its safe. Until my phone starts going off. damn. I flip open my phone and read the text.
"what are you a zombie? wake up!" damn you technology. I reply with a "k" and slowly shift my weight and sit up. Its cold outside my blankets and I frown.
I throw on a pair of sweat pants a band t-shirt, and a Lacrosse sweatshirt. I spend what feels like forever brushing out my hair, I try to hurry I don't want the pinking to start up again like I know it will. I throw my hair into a pony tail and tip toe down the stairs.
The rest of the house is still sound asleep in there warm comfy beds, lucky bastards. I reach the door and open it quietly. sitting on my front steppes is Geddis. I bet hes a morning person. I roll my eyes at the thought.
"this better be good" I say, he knows I'm not mean just grumpy from being woken up. he smiles and takes my hand. he leads me to his car, opens the door for me and shuts it behind me. his car smells nice, kind of like Christmas. He has a pile of homework on the backseat.
"oh it will be, whats your favorite coffee place? you look like you need it" he says with a smile, gosh I love it when he smiles.
" awakenings, and what are you calling me ugly?" I ask just kidding around. he chuckles and shakes his head. he starts his car and off we go to awakenings. I order for both him and myself. after I down about half of mine hes dragging me out the door again.
We start driving and I regonzie this part of the neighborhood right away. It the part I used to hang out at all the time. because its almost winter and really cold no one is there. smart people. I frown as I notice Geddis is grabbing a basketball out of the trunk.
"Whats that for?" I ask timidly. he smirks and just stats walking briskly toward the basketball
court with me in tow.
"okay here are the rules, I make a basket I ask you a question, you miss a basket you tell me something about you and vise versa." He looks so proud of himself for making up this game I just cant say no. I grab the ball, let my shoulders drop and arch the ball into the basket. he stares at me with wide eyes.
"what? I said I didn't like basketball not that I'm not good at it" I say rather sarcastically. "that means I ask you a question right?" he nods. "why did you wake me up at 8 am on a Saturday?" I giggle and he easily hugs me and says
"I want to know you better, and as you know I'm a morning person" he sticks his tongue out at me and I'm tempted to through the basketball at his head, but I'm nice and throw it into his hands. he takes his shot and makes it. his question is simple but I don't know why I didn't just lie, I actually told him the truth.
" whats a hobie you like to do that no one knows about?" he asks looking like hes trying to hold in a laugh.
"photography" I say meaning it. I'm actually really good at photography but no one knows about it. I like to keep my secrets. he arches an eye brow and throws the ball back to me.
by the end of the morning I find out I like this game, and I also really like who Geddis is. he's curious. smart and very perceptive. he learns that I love the ocean almost more then life and hes not surprised he says I look like I would. He also finds out I'm really nervous about people finding out who I am. I find out that hes shy and loves basketball because he doesn't have to pretend to be bad at it.
We both agree that parties are pretty much the lamest thing on earth. Guess what? we are both nerdy.
" One last question, why do you hate dating so much?" he looks extremely serious for the first time all day. I grab the basketball and stare at the little bumps on the surface. He doesn't rush me, but I keep studying it like its going to change any second. I turn the ball over and look into his eyes. I know my eyes are almost black from sadness. how do I tell him that I fell in love and got my heartbroken almost beyond repair? a warm tear falls on the basketball. He walks over to me and puts his arms around me.
"shh its going to me alright" he whispers in my ear, that makes the tears fall even more. I know this is dumb. he asked a simple question. why do I have to cry every time I think of him? I cant even say his name without it being fallowed by sobs. I'm weak and that's not how its supposed to be with me. I'm strong.I cant talk about him. not yet.
"take me home please" I ask as quietly as a mouse. he nods and hugs me. he cranks the heat in the car and I feel safe with him there. he holds my hand with his free hand and it makes me feel better.
When we get home the drive way is empty. Geddis fallows me into the house and picks up a note off the table.
hey Em,
we went to visit your sister at collage today, be good, there's some mac and cheese in the stove all you have to do is heat it up.
Love mom and dad.
I smile a half smile as Geddis walks into the kitchen and turns on the oven. I can already tell hes intent on staying. he wonders through the huge house until he find the living room with our billions of movies.
"go take a shower, and put warm clothes on, I'll pick out a movie and change into my set of clothes." I do as he says with out complaint I'm soaking wet and freezing. Crying always makes me feel colder.
The hot water does wonders for my thinking, and my sore muscles from shooting all those baskets. I think and think but I just cant bring myself to risk getting hurt again, I'm still broken from last time.
I step out the shower and steam inculcates me. I comb and my hair and pad into my room to grab a dry pair of sweats. I hear clanking down staires and conclude that the food is ready to eat and I'm starving, my tummy rubles in agreement. I look one last time in the mirror and notice I look peaceful.
I almost run down the staires and smile when I see the food on two plates and Aladin in the dvd player. One of my favorites by far. I sit back and relax with Geddis at my side and I feel safe and happy.
Until I get a text message from him. I start shaking and Geddis immediately looks at me with concern. He grabs my phone opens the message and deletes it. I look up at him and he just stokes my hair. I feel so safe with him. and it scares me.
One tiny pebble after another. I pull my pillow over my head and my breath warms the bed that's way to close to my face for comfort.
The pebbles stop and I think its safe. Until my phone starts going off. damn. I flip open my phone and read the text.
"what are you a zombie? wake up!" damn you technology. I reply with a "k" and slowly shift my weight and sit up. Its cold outside my blankets and I frown.
I throw on a pair of sweat pants a band t-shirt, and a Lacrosse sweatshirt. I spend what feels like forever brushing out my hair, I try to hurry I don't want the pinking to start up again like I know it will. I throw my hair into a pony tail and tip toe down the stairs.
The rest of the house is still sound asleep in there warm comfy beds, lucky bastards. I reach the door and open it quietly. sitting on my front steppes is Geddis. I bet hes a morning person. I roll my eyes at the thought.
"this better be good" I say, he knows I'm not mean just grumpy from being woken up. he smiles and takes my hand. he leads me to his car, opens the door for me and shuts it behind me. his car smells nice, kind of like Christmas. He has a pile of homework on the backseat.
"oh it will be, whats your favorite coffee place? you look like you need it" he says with a smile, gosh I love it when he smiles.
" awakenings, and what are you calling me ugly?" I ask just kidding around. he chuckles and shakes his head. he starts his car and off we go to awakenings. I order for both him and myself. after I down about half of mine hes dragging me out the door again.
We start driving and I regonzie this part of the neighborhood right away. It the part I used to hang out at all the time. because its almost winter and really cold no one is there. smart people. I frown as I notice Geddis is grabbing a basketball out of the trunk.
"Whats that for?" I ask timidly. he smirks and just stats walking briskly toward the basketball
court with me in tow.
"okay here are the rules, I make a basket I ask you a question, you miss a basket you tell me something about you and vise versa." He looks so proud of himself for making up this game I just cant say no. I grab the ball, let my shoulders drop and arch the ball into the basket. he stares at me with wide eyes.
"what? I said I didn't like basketball not that I'm not good at it" I say rather sarcastically. "that means I ask you a question right?" he nods. "why did you wake me up at 8 am on a Saturday?" I giggle and he easily hugs me and says
"I want to know you better, and as you know I'm a morning person" he sticks his tongue out at me and I'm tempted to through the basketball at his head, but I'm nice and throw it into his hands. he takes his shot and makes it. his question is simple but I don't know why I didn't just lie, I actually told him the truth.
" whats a hobie you like to do that no one knows about?" he asks looking like hes trying to hold in a laugh.
"photography" I say meaning it. I'm actually really good at photography but no one knows about it. I like to keep my secrets. he arches an eye brow and throws the ball back to me.
by the end of the morning I find out I like this game, and I also really like who Geddis is. he's curious. smart and very perceptive. he learns that I love the ocean almost more then life and hes not surprised he says I look like I would. He also finds out I'm really nervous about people finding out who I am. I find out that hes shy and loves basketball because he doesn't have to pretend to be bad at it.
We both agree that parties are pretty much the lamest thing on earth. Guess what? we are both nerdy.
" One last question, why do you hate dating so much?" he looks extremely serious for the first time all day. I grab the basketball and stare at the little bumps on the surface. He doesn't rush me, but I keep studying it like its going to change any second. I turn the ball over and look into his eyes. I know my eyes are almost black from sadness. how do I tell him that I fell in love and got my heartbroken almost beyond repair? a warm tear falls on the basketball. He walks over to me and puts his arms around me.
"shh its going to me alright" he whispers in my ear, that makes the tears fall even more. I know this is dumb. he asked a simple question. why do I have to cry every time I think of him? I cant even say his name without it being fallowed by sobs. I'm weak and that's not how its supposed to be with me. I'm strong.I cant talk about him. not yet.
"take me home please" I ask as quietly as a mouse. he nods and hugs me. he cranks the heat in the car and I feel safe with him there. he holds my hand with his free hand and it makes me feel better.
When we get home the drive way is empty. Geddis fallows me into the house and picks up a note off the table.
hey Em,
we went to visit your sister at collage today, be good, there's some mac and cheese in the stove all you have to do is heat it up.
Love mom and dad.
I smile a half smile as Geddis walks into the kitchen and turns on the oven. I can already tell hes intent on staying. he wonders through the huge house until he find the living room with our billions of movies.
"go take a shower, and put warm clothes on, I'll pick out a movie and change into my set of clothes." I do as he says with out complaint I'm soaking wet and freezing. Crying always makes me feel colder.
The hot water does wonders for my thinking, and my sore muscles from shooting all those baskets. I think and think but I just cant bring myself to risk getting hurt again, I'm still broken from last time.
I step out the shower and steam inculcates me. I comb and my hair and pad into my room to grab a dry pair of sweats. I hear clanking down staires and conclude that the food is ready to eat and I'm starving, my tummy rubles in agreement. I look one last time in the mirror and notice I look peaceful.
I almost run down the staires and smile when I see the food on two plates and Aladin in the dvd player. One of my favorites by far. I sit back and relax with Geddis at my side and I feel safe and happy.
Until I get a text message from him. I start shaking and Geddis immediately looks at me with concern. He grabs my phone opens the message and deletes it. I look up at him and he just stokes my hair. I feel so safe with him. and it scares me.