But Maybe We'll Live Forever

The next day I awoke with a jolt, realizing I was in the Killjoy-mobile and we’d hit a rut in the road.

Grace was sitting on Kobra Kid’s lap and Bulletproof Liberation was miraculously squeezed between me and Jet Star, not looking nearly as uncomfortable as she should’ve looked. It took me a minute to process they were even there, but eventually I was able to clear up my brain and vision to see them there.

“’Mornin’, sleepyhead,” Bulletproof said, laughing and nudging me. “Well, actually more like afternoon. It’s like 3pm.”

“How… what? How did I even—”

“Kobra carried you in. You didn’t even notice. You were dead to the world,” Bulletproof said, trying to be as cheerful as possible, though I could tell she was uncomfortable; unsure how I felt towards her at the moment, considering the circumstances.

I looked over to the front seat where Kobra Kid was; he was purposely not even showing signs of looking in my direction. He made sure that he was talking to Grace about coyotes, rather than looking at me or saying anything to me.

I sighed and smiled dully. “Well, that’s nice.”

There was an awkward silence.

“So,” Party Poison said, his voice dripping with authority. “I assume you slept well.” He looked in the rearview mirror at me, humor shining in his eyes.

I shot him a glare. He wasn’t off the hook yet; none of them were. I did not like them. I did not approve of what they did. I hated them, and I was only doing this bullshit for Rory. I was hoping for some miraculous sign showing that Rory had done this for a good reason.

“Lower the weapons in your eyes,” Party said, rolling his own eyes. His voice changed to one of annoyance and even more authority. “So you’re with us. Get over it. You didn’t have to stay; you just saw some reason. Maybe reason that wasn’t good enough for you, but reason nonetheless. We’ve been nothing but kind to you.”

“Nothing but kind? Well, sure, now that I think about it. You were so pleasant to kidnap me and take me into your demonic group and then practically abuse me when I found out some facts.” I let my hair fall into my face, covering up my eyes.

“We saved your life, Atomic. And you weren’t exactly listening to anything we had to say.”

“Whatever.”

“No, not whatever. You’re acting like a child.”

“Oh no, am I? Please don’t kill me, O Great Killjoy, like you did to those other—”

Kobra Kid whipped around and reached out for my neck, grabbing it tightly. This caused Grace to scream and Bulletproof Liberation to gasp; the other Killjoys just averted their eyes. I couldn’t breathe with his grip on my throat, so I kept choking and gasping for air that didn’t come.

“I told you never to bring that up again.” Kobra looked me directly in the eyes; his intense, angry ones meeting my fearful and disturbed ones.

“Kobra! Kobra, you’re hurting her!” Grace was crying.

At hearing Grace’s cries, he let go of my throat and hugged her, leaving me to collapse onto Fun Ghoul. Silently, he put his fingerless-gloved hand over mine comfortingly, but didn’t meet my eyes. He just kept staring ahead.

“Are you alright?” whispered Bulletproof Liberation, leaning over to me, her big eyes showing obvious concern.

“Fine,” I wheezed, shutting my eyes tightly to keep the tears from falling. I didn’t bother getting off of Fun Ghoul, and I didn’t bother meeting anyone else’s gaze, though I felt many eyes on me.

“We’re gonna stay at the nearby motel up ahead. It’s in the middle of fuckin’ nowhere. Not even a full pool for the desert. It’s a piece of trash, not even Better Living agents would bother stopping there to look for us,” Party Poison said, completely ignoring what had just happened. “We should be there in about three hours. We’re not gonna stop at the diner this time, guys. Sorry, but I’m not going that extra hour tonight.”

There were plenty of murmurs of “it’s fine” and “whatever.”

I shut my eyes even tighter, hoping that I could block out everything by doing so. Alas, that didn’t work, and I was left still feeling the presence of them all.

[x]

We drove up to the motel around 6pm, exactly as Party had predicted. And he was right, too: the place was crap. An empty pool and a neon sign with half the letters burnt out; the buildings weren’t washed, and I was pretty sure that the flag was black from dust.

“Home, sweet home… for tonight,” Jet Star said, getting out of the car and breathing in some dry air.

I got out along with everyone else and followed Party Poison inside as he paid for our rooms. He looked disappointed and came back to us. “Two to a room, one bed.”

“I’ll be with Grace,” Bulletproof said automatically.

“I call my own room,” Jet Star said, earning a death glare from Fun Ghoul and Kobra Kid.

“Hah, no. I’m getting my own room,” Party Poison said. “I need to plan, and I need space for throwing things around when my first five plans don’t make sense. Fun Ghoul, you’re with Jet Star. Atomic, I’m sorry, but you’re with Kobra Kid.”

“What? I’m not going to share a room with him! What if he tries to kill me again?” I complained.

“He won’t.” Party gave Kobra a deadly look. “He’s going to treat you like a gentleman, and if he doesn’t, he’ll have to deal with me. Any problems, I’m two doors down from you. Come and get me. Alright?”

I glared over at Kobra Kid, who had on his poker face. I crossed my arms and rolled my eyes, looking over at the wall as if it were the most interesting thing I’ve ever seen. “Fine.”

“Good. Alright. Follow me, I’ll show you where we are.” Party gave us all their keycards and then showed us all to our rooms.

He showed me and Kobra to our room first and shut us in. We were alone now.

I made a show of not looking at Kobra Kid and examining the room.

It was like every other motel room I’d ever been to: boring bed with a semi-okay mattress that had a weird pattern on the blanket, white walls, a heater, a cheap safe, a small semi-clean bathroom, a desk with an uncomfortable chair, and a TV that cost ungodly amounts of money to use. Boring and dull, but it would give us a place to sleep, and that’s all that mattered.

It took me a moment to realize Kobra Kid was practically on top of me, staring at me. But when I did realize it, it hit me like a ton of bricks. “Shit! Kobra…”

He smirked. “At least you’re looking at me now.” He took off his jacket to reveal a zebra – or tiger? – striped shirt. It was yellow. He hung his jacket over the desk’s chair and took off his sunglasses, putting them on the desk. He sat down on the bed and took off his shoes.

“You can’t be acting like I’m holding some unnecessary grudge. I couldn’t fucking breathe.”

“What can I say? I have a short temper.”

“I know it upset you. Stop treating this so… lightly.”

He looked over at me. “How am I supposed to treat it, Atomic? It’s not something I can be all upset about, and it’s not something that I shouldn’t think about from time to time. Leave it alone, just leave it alone already. And stop throwing it in our faces repeatedly. Did you hear nothing I tried to tell you back at the hotel?”

“I heard you.” I looked down, trying to push away the memory. “How did you think I knew all this upset you? Well, besides the death grip on my neck.”

“You’re so god damn frustrating,” Kobra said, collapsing onto the bed.

“I’m frustrating? Take a look in the mirror!”

“I try not to. I don’t get to shower often.”

“That’s not funny.”

“Really? I thought it was.”

“Stop being so fucking sarcastic!”

“How about you calm the fuck down?”

Our voices kept rising more and more with every comeback towards each other. Kobra was sitting up now, giving me a death glare, and I was returning it with as much malice as I could possibly come up with.

“You know what?” I said, taking a few steps toward him, feeling more anger boiling up through me. I didn’t want to deal with him anymore, and I had to just say what I needed to say.

“What?” he asked, standing up and getting in my face, only a few centimeters away.

“I hate you.”

And then, in the blink of an eye, he grabbed my face and kissed me fiercely, anger and passion and some other emotion I couldn’t quite understand all rushing through our faces. I was too shocked to do anything. My eyes were wide open and I didn’t kiss back.

Then he pulled away and stared at me, his eyes still looking angry and deadly. He was breathing heavily; his shoulders were heaving in a steady rhythm.

I couldn’t do anything besides stare at him, so that’s exactly what I did. My hand wandered up to my mouth and I held it there, feeling the remnants of the feeling of the kiss, my eyes wide and my mouth open as I stared at him stupidly. I blinked a few times, but that was all.

“I hate you too,” Kobra Kid whispered. “So, so much.”