Glitter

I was fully convinced I was dying.

Max told me over and over that it only seemed like it but I was certain that soon i'd be six feet under in a box. My entire body ached like someone had hit me with a car, I couldn't keep anything down, I was sweating up a storm and despite the fact I was tired as hell I couldn't sleep. I felt even worse for making Max put up with all this shit.

Max had taken me into his house two days ago and hadn't slept a wink since. He was too busy trying to get me to eat something, holding my hair when I was sick, getting me blankets when I was cold and a fan when I was hot. He had been taking amazing care of me and I loved him even more for it.

I heard the door open from where I was curled up in the fetal position on Max's bed, my head covered by blankets and a moment later the bed shifted. My stomach rolled and I moaned.

"Regan are you okay?" Max asked.

I opened my mouth to reply when my stomach lurched. I just made it over the bucket that Max had put out for me. Max grabbed for my hair, pulling it out of my face but not quite quick enough. Some of it got into my hair and on my face. Rolling over onto my back tears began to streak down my cheeks.

Now not only did I feel like hell but now I was disgusting.

"Shh...don't cry." Max said pushing my hair out of my face.

"I just want to die." I sobbed turning my back to him.

"No you don't Regan...it's just a side effect from the Oxy withdrawal. C'mon let's go get you cleaned up." he said getting up from the bed and walking over to my side.

He took me by the hands and pulled me to my feet. However lack of sleep and ability to consume food had made me weak and my knees buckled under me. Max caught me before I could fall completely. Without hesitation he picked me up bridal style and carried me to the bathroom.

He sat me down on the closed lid of the toilet and sat me down. I watched as he started the shower, testing the water before walking to the closet and pulling out towels and a washcloth. He sat them on the sink before walking over to me.

"Arms up babe." he said.

I held my arms up and he pulled my Asking Alexandria shirt over my head and stuffed into into the hamper before sitting on the floor in front of me and pulling off my thigh high black skeleton socks. He wrapped his arms around me and lifted me up.

"Put your arms around my neck." he replied.

I did as he said and he pulled down my pink panties before setting me down on toilet again. I watched as he pulled his clothes off and tossed them along with my socks and panties. Once he was undressed he picked me up and carried me into the shower and sat me down.

Sitting on the floor of the shower I pulled my knees up under my chin and rested my forehead on them. The warm water cascaded down my back and warmed me. A moment later I felt hands on my head and the smell of shampoo filled my nose.

Max scrubbed my head before using a cup to rinse my hair. After that he took up the washcloth and carefully began to wash the vomit from my face, humming softly. I felt like a little kid again. He'd undressed me and now was washing my body, face and hair.

He began to wash my back and it felt good. Slowly my eyelids grew heavier and heavier, the feeling of his hands slowly relaxing me. Before I knew what had happened I was curled against his chest sound asleep.

Max's POV:

Regan sat in front of me as I washed her back. She was having a hell of a time with this oxy withdraw. She was weak from not eating or sleeping. It wasn't until she was curled up against my chest that I noticed that she was asleep.

I looked down at her. She was pale and her hair fell in wet tendrils around her face. Sighing I reached up and turned off the shower before standing up and scooping her up into my arms.

I stepped out of the shower and wrapped one of the towels I'd pulled out earlier and settled her still sleeping form into a chair in the corner of my room. Drying off, I pulled on a pair of boxers and a t-shirt before changing the sheets and retrieving my girlfriend.

She was shivering so I quickly dried her off and dressed her in a pair of panties, a t-shirt and socks and put her under the covers. From somewhere at the foot of the bed I heard something. It was her phone which sat on top of her bag.

I picked it up and saw there were 10 missed calls, all from Ronnie. I sighed. It was hard on her not telling anyone what was going on.

Robert, Monte and Micheal thought we were off somewhere for the weekend. What she'd told Ronnie I didn't know but he had called her thousands of times, leaving voice mail after voice mail, text after text. He was getting worried but I knew that Regan didn't want him to know about what was going on here. She was so afraid of losing him. She loved him so much and he loved her just as much. I smiled at a memory from a long time ago crossed my mind.

Ronnie was 15, I was 14 and Regan was 13. Ronnie and I were sitting in his room messing around with his old guitar. He was singing a new song he'd written.

"Mother...where are you today?
You took a piece of me the day you went away
No relocation nor the smell of your perfume
I took a piece of you the day I left the womb..."

There was a knock at the door and a moment later Regan's head poked inside.

"What's up kid?" Ronnie asked looking at his little sister.

"Nothing...I thought I heard you singing." she replied opening the door a little wider.

Even though she was barely 13, her birthday only 3 weeks before, she was still beautiful. However it wasn't something I was EVER planning on mentioning to Ronnie. I was afraid that he'd beat the shit out of me for even noticing it.

It couldn't be denied though. She stood in the door, her hair still dark brown, not the raven black color it was now and pulled into a ponytail. Her chocolate colored eyes were lightly outlined with black thanks to Ronnie teaching her how to apply eyeliner a year before and she wore a pair of short cut offs and a tight Blink 182 t-shirt that hugged her just developing figure. Like I said beautiful.

"Yeah we were working on a new song." Ronnie replied.

"Can I see?" she asked.

He picked up the beat up red spiral bound notebook, flipped to the page and handed it to her. She took it, kicked a pile of clothes across the messy floor and plopped down in the empty spot, reading the song. Her brow furrowed as she read.

"It's about Mama isn't it?" she asked her eyes dark.

Out of all the Radke kids Regan had taken her mother's leaving two years earlier the hardest. Despite the fact she was a mean and violent drinker/drug addict she did seem to care about her kids when she was sober enough. She was growing up and needed a mom but didn't have one. She had Ronnie but sometimes it just wasn't enough. For such a young girl Regan carried around a lot of hatred and sadness.

"Yeah it is. C'mere." Ronnie said reaching for his younger sister.

She took his hand and sat down on the bed by us.

"Okay, I'm going to play and you just sing okay?" he said pointing to the page of the notebook.

She nodded and he started. He played a little intro before nodding at her to start singing.

Mother, where are you today?
You took a piece of me the day you went away,
No recollection or the smell of your perfume,
I took a piece of you the day I left the womb.
(The day I left the womb)

Brother, put your needles down.
The best thing for you is to leave this awful town.
Pretty soon, you'll have kids to feed.
If you see mother, tell her I can sing.

Please don't worry, I am doing fine.
You're much too busy to even find the time,
So use your chemicals and take this to your grave,
The boys you left are men you didn't raise.

And daddy, how are you today?
You must be proud of the boys that you have raised.
Your withered heart, and everything it's seen,
Your cuts and calloused hands, you had kids to feed.
You had kids to feed.

Please don't worry, I am doing fine.
You're much too busy to even find the time,
So use your chemicals and take this to your grave,
The boys you left are men you didn't raise

I smiled listening to her sing. She sounded like Ronnie and had the same intensity in her eyes that he did. I loved listening to and watching her sing.

"That was great Regan." Ronnie said smiling.

"Thanks. What did you think Max?" she asked looking at me for my approval.

"You sounded really good." I replied.

A smile a mile wide spread across her face, "Thanks! Anyhow I gotta go get ready for my date." she said climbing off of the bed.

"DATE?!?" Ronnie said as she skipped toward the door.

"Mhmm...Dad said that it was cool if I went with Cooper to the movies." she said.

"Do I know this Cooper?" Ronnie asked, the kid's name coming off his tongue like a swear.

"Um...don't think so. He's in my history class and I'm in a whole different school than you so...no." she replied.

"And you two are going alone?"

"No! Jesus I know Dad's scatterbrained but he'd never let me go unsupervised. His parents are coming." I replied.

"Yeah well that's the only people that had better be coming young lady!" he replied.

"What're you-OH MY GOD YOU'RE DISGUSTING RONNIE!! WE'RE THIRTEEN!" she replied looking horrified at him.

"Well I know what thirteen year old guys are like! When I was thirteen I was fucking-" but he was interrupted as Regan grabbed a pillow off the bed and smacked him square in the face with it.

"NO! Shut up! I don't wanna know what kind of manwhore you were at my age!" she yelled and ran out of the room singing 'The Anthem' by Good Charlotte at the top of lungs, her hands clasped over her ears.

"You know she's got to grow up sometime Ronnie." I said after her door had slammed.

"Yeah but it doesn't mean I have to like the guys she dates." he replied looking down the hall at his sister's door.

"So you're never going to like the guys she dates?" I asked.

"Probably not. Probably going to want to beat the hell outta all of them." he replied.

I laughed but I won't lie...inside I was shitting myself.

I smiled thinking about how scared I was to tell Ronnie originally that Regan and I were a thing. He'd been cool about it though.

I laid down beside Regan's sleeping form and pulled her close to me. Still asleep she snuggled closer into my chest. Kissing her cheek I took in her natural smell. However as I laid there looking at the beautiful creature beside me I couldn't help but think of how Ronnie would take us being together this time. It was with those thoughts that I fell asleep.