Glitter

“So they figured out what was wrong with the car.” Max said his figure casting a shadow over me and snapping me from my thoughts.

“Good so they can fix it and we can get back on the road?” I asked.

“Unfortunately no. They have the part and can fix it in a few hours but they’re closed.” he replied.

“Seriously?”

“Yeah. However lucky for us the mechanic lives in a motel down the street. He’ll give us a lift there so we can get a couple of rooms for the night.” Max said.

I sighed, “Great.”

Standing up I brushed the dust from my ass and followed Max to the garage. I grabbed my bag from the trunk and Max retrieved a pair of jeans and a t-shirt from the back seat.

‘Do you always keep extra clothes in your car?” I asked.

“You never know where you’ll end up at night.” he said with suggestive wink.

“You’re disgusting.” I replied.

He just shook his head and walked over to where the greasy guy he’d been talking to earlier was standing by a beat up pick up truck. I was introduced to the guy who I found out was named Bud before sliding into the cab. Max sat in the middle with me pressed against the door.

We drove for a few minutes, the sound of annoying honky tonk pouring from the radio. Finally we pulled into a dusty and slightly seedy looking motel. Max thanked Bud for the ride and the two of us walked to the office.

Max rang the bell and an older woman walked out with a smile, “How can I help you two?” she asked.

“We’d like 2 rooms for the night.” Max replied.

She pulled a large book from under the desk and opened it up, “Hmmm…well it seems that I only have one room open at the moment. The rest are all full.” she replied.

“Only one room? Are you sure?” I asked.

“I sure am.” she replied.

“B-But we’re in the middle of nowhere! How can there be only one room left?!?” I asked my voice rising.

“Truck drivers hon. They pass through and need a place to sleep. So do you want the room?” she asked the smile still genuine on her face.

I looked at Max who shook his head, “Yeah. We’ll take it.” he replied.

The lady gave us a key and a stack of towels before giving us directions to our room. We walked in silence to room 6B. Max unlocked the door and we walked into the room. It was retro but not hip fun retro. No this was like the bad side of the 70’s .

The carpet was an ugly orange and the walls were a stained beige. The small table and two chairs were made of yellowed Formica with orange faux leather cushions that were cracked exposing the stuffing inside. Pushed just under the yellow and orange curtained window was an old couch. However what bothered me the most was that there was only a one full bed sitting against the wall.

“There’s only one bed.” I said turning to Max.

“So?” he asked.

“So you’d better hope there’s blankets in that closet over there because you’re sleeping on the couch.” I replied with a cocky smirk and flopped heavily onto the bed.

“Oh hell no!” Max replied.

“Oh hell yes. I refuse to sleep on that…thing. God knows what’s on it.” I said pointing to the couch.

“But it’s okay that I sleep on it?” he asked.

“Yeah. I mean god only knows what half the chicks you sleep with have so you should be right at home. Besides I have a bad back.” I replied.

“A bad back? Since when?!?”

“Remember when I fell off the stage at that one show of yours? Yeah well it turns out that messed it up and if you don’t want to have to carry me around tomorrow I have to sleep on the bed.”

He sighed, “We could always share it.”

“Uh…no. Not happening big boy. Enjoy the couch.” I said stood up, “Now I’m going to go get a shower.” I said and grabbed a pair of pj’s from my bag and a towel and walked into the bathroom.

I stripped off my clothes and tossed the bracelets that littered my wrists onto the counter. As I reached for the knobs my eyes fell on the marks that littered my wrists. I’d tried to tattoo over them and they were less noticeable but to me they stood out like huge beacons of my past. Shaking it off I climbed under the warm water.

I showered quickly and pulled on my pajamas before pulling my hair into a braid. Bunching up my dirty clothes I walked out to find Max making up the couch with sheets and blankets. I stuffed my clothes into my bag and found my contact case and put them inside before putting on my glasses and sitting down on the bed with a magazine. It was old and I’d read it a million times but it had My Chemical Romance on the cover which was one of my favorite bands.

Without a word Max stood and walked to the bathroom. I heard the shower start and a few moments later the sounds of low singing. I laughed to myself remembering how bad of a singer he was by himself. Backup and screaming he was good at but solo wasn’t something Max should attempt.

I attempted to read some random article but my eyes grew too heavy for me to stand. Reluctantly I put my magazine down and sat my glasses on the stand before climbing under the sheets. Not long after that Max emerged from the bathroom. I watched from under half closed lids as he walked over to the couch in his boxers and shirt and flipped off the light at the switch. A few moments later the darkness got to me and I fell asleep.

However my sleep didn’t last long. I was awoken soon after by a loud crack of thunder. The moment it met my ears I was sitting bolt upright in bed. I hated storms. I’d hated them since I was 4 and Riley and Ronnie had let me watch some slasher flick where the psycho killed people only when it was raining. After that I’d been terrified that someone was going to murder me during one.

Thunder boomed again and lighting flashed and from between my lips a reluctant whimper emerged. I decided to just to try and get back to sleep. I curled into a little ball and pulled the covers over my head.

It didn’t work very well. Every time there was a ‘BOOM’ I’d have to hold in a whimper or on the big ones a scream. I was resigning myself to the fact that I wasn’t going to get any sleep when suddenly the blankets were pulled from my body.

I screamed blood murder as the memory of the killer in the movie played back through my mind.

“Regan! REAGAN! REGAN JOANNE!”

I stop screaming and open my eyes to see Max standing over me, the light on and him holding me by the shoulders.

“Max?” I asked my chest rising quickly.

“Yeah! Now what the fuck was that about?” he asked.

I opened my mouth to reply when thunder crashed again and I flinched, my teeth biting down on my lip.

“Ah. Gotcha. I forgot. You’re afraid of thunderstorms. “

“Y-yeah. Big time.” I replied my voice shaking just as hard as my body.

“Well…how do you normally deal with it?” he asked.

“Usually I t-turn on the TV and w-when I still lived at home Ronnie used to let me sleep with him.” I replied.

Ronnie had always been the one to comfort me even after he started getting high. Riley…well he was like Ronnie in the fact that he dabbled heavily in drugs but unlike Ronnie drugs were all he cared about. He couldn’t give a shit less if me, Ronnie and Dad ended up dead in a ditch as long as he got his fix.

“Well there’s no TV here. Do you want me to sleep with you?” Max asked.

“What?!? Hell no! J-Just go back to your couch Max. I’ll be fine.” I snapped.

He let out an exasperated sigh, “That’s what I get for trying to be nice to you! Fine sleep over here all by yourself and be scared! Don’t ask me for help when you change your mind.” he snapped back and walked over to the couch and turned the light back out.

I laid back with a disgusted sigh and pulled the blankets back over myself and moments later I regretted turning down Max’s invitation. The storm decided it wanted to get worse and moments later it seemed like the thunder and lighting was constant. I couldn’t take it. So I swallowed my pride.

“M-Max?” I asked though the dark.

“What Regan?” he asked his voice muffled like it was buried in a pillow or something.

“Would you p-please come o-over here?” I asked.

I actually expected him to say no but I saw by the faint light from between the curtains Max pick up his pillow and blanket. He walked over to the other side of the bed and tossed the pillow and blanket down before crawling under the covers next to me.

“T-Thanks.” I said laying back on my pillow.

“No problem.” he said and turned away from me.

There was another boom and I jumped.

I heard Max sigh, “C’mere.” and his arm wrapped around my waist pulling me across the bed so that my back was pressed against his chest, his arms around my middle.

“Better?” he asked.

“Yeah. Thanks.” I replied.

“Sure.”

We laid there for a few minutes and I had to admit that Max’s arms around me were comforting. However it didn’t help me sleep any and I guess it didn’t do it for him either because I felt his finger tracing the tattoos that colored my arms from my shoulders to wrist.

“When did you get so many tattoos?” Max asked after lying in silence for what seemed like forever.

“A couple years ago.” I replied.

“Does Ronnie know?” he asked the smirk evident in his voice.

Ronnie had always been against me getting inked despite the fact that he was covered in tattoos. I’d loved them from the moment he’d gotten his first one. I never understood why he wanted me to avoid the needle but I’d ignored it.

“No but he'd flipped a shit if he did.” I replied.

“There you go with that again.” he laughed.

“With what?” I asked.

“How the fuck do you flip a shit? You never did tell me.” he replied.

“Because it’s a stupid ass question.” I laughed.

Now don’t ask me what happened because I don’t even know. One moment I was lying there beside Max and the next thing I knew his lips were attached to mine. I lay there for a second, frozen to the spot, as his lips moved over mine before my lips began to respond.

Emotions that I’d long since suppressed began to stir in my chest and my brain (which had been screaming at me to stop since I’d asked Max to lay with me) was shut off. I tangled my fingers in his dark hair as his tongue pressed between my lips tangling with mine. He moved so that he was over me, his hands moving over my body.

Kisses trailed from my lips down my neck, his teeth nipping expertly at my soft spot. A moan escaped my lips. I felt him smile against my neck and continue kissing down until his lips were running along my collarbone.

I soon grew tired of being the submissive one in all of this so with a shove against his shoulder I rolled us over so that I was straddling his hips. Grabbing his lips again I toyed with his snakebites with my tongue while his hands moved down from where they’d settled on my waist to my ass. Smiling into the kiss I began to grind our hips together.

His lips moaned against mine and just as suddenly as it had started, with that one noise, my brain turned back on. As soon as that happened I pulled my lips from Max and moved to the other side of the bed.

“Regan? What’s wrong? What was that?” he asked looking at me.

“I-I can’t do this Max.” I replied.

“So you can start it but not finish it?”

“It should’ve never started to begin with.” I said not looking at him.

Max sighed in frustration, “I am so fucking sick of this shit Regan! You break up with me two years ago and then treat me like I killed your puppy or something! Like I broke up with you! I mean….WHY? If this is all because of the shit that went down with Ronnie then you have some serious fucking issues!”

I turned and looked at him, “You want to know why I broke up with you Max?” I asked.

“Yes Regan. Please enlighten me as to why the girl that I was in love with completely and utterly shattered my heart.” he replied.

“You left me.” I replied.

“Left you? I left you? What the-wait…this is because I went on tour?” he asked.

“Yes Max it’s because you went on tour and left me alone! I had to deal with everything on my own! Riley was fucked up on drugs and Dad was fucking working all the time to pay for Ronnie’s lawyers! You didn’t even tell me that you were leaving! I went to your house and your brother Todd told me that you’d left for tour! He thought you’d taken me with you!” I yelled standing up from the bed and looking at him.

“What did you want me to do Regan?!? I couldn’t deal with it either! Ronnie was my best fucking friend! I cared about him too!” he yelled back.

“What did I want you to do? As my boyfriend you should have been there to hold me when I was crying! At first I thought you were dealing with stuff on your own and would be there for me when you’d worked out what you needed to! Then I found out that you’d left me….abandoned me! You have no fucking idea what that did to me! I couldn’t take it! You and Ronnie both? It was too much!” I yelled and reached over and flipped on the light before walking over and shoving my arms in his face.

“Look and tell me what you see Maxwell.” I spat.

“I don’t-” but he stopped a moment later. His eyes went from my marked wrists before looking me in the face.

“What do you see?” I asked.

“S-Scars.” he replied.

“That’s right scars. I tried to end it. It was too much. I took a hand full of Vicodin and slashed my wrists. Dad came home ten minutes later and found me. If he hadn’t you wouldn’t have to be looking at me now.” I said the tears running freely from my eyes.

“I-I didn’t know.” he said.

“No you didn’t and you didn’t care either. You never called once while you were on tour so I called you. I told you it was over and I moved away from Vegas. From there I met up with a guy named Garret and then last month he up and left me in Tuscon. So there. It’s all out in the open. You want to know why I’ve been so bitchy? That’s why and as soon as we get back to Vegas I’m walking away and you’re not going to see me again.” I said and with that I grabbed my pillow and the blanket from the bed and walked into the bathroom, locking the door behind me.

After making a bed in the tub I climbed in and cried myself to sleep.