Right Through Me

The whole game my eyes were glued to the certain Spaniard that still held my heart. I was torn since I didn’t know who to root for but since Cesc invited me and has been a friend to me for so long I decided to cheer for Arsenal.

It made me more relaxed cheering for Arsenal than Chelsea because it would have been plain awkward being surrounded by the girlfriends and wives of Arsenal players. Finally I broke my gaze on the brunette Spaniard to have it locked on the black haired one.

The shorter Spanish man flew with ease as he passed the ball to another player. I was embarrassed that I forgot the player’s name since Cesc introduced us right before the game started. But I quickly pushed that back when the player quickly maneuvered around another player to pass it back to Cesc.

I bit my lip in anticipation; he was so close to scoring. My gray eyes followed the Gunner as I felt my body subconsciously rise up from my seat. When I saw Cesc’s foot kick the ball that hit the back of the net I stood straight up cheering.

Throwing my hands up and I jumped up and down with the rest of the fans I felt the excitement pulse through me. Cesc was clobbered by his teammates as they all had huge Cheshire grins on their faces. My lips stretched into a smile seeing how Cesc was so happy.

His dark brown eyes locked with mine as he mouthed ‘para tu’ I blushed knowing what it meant even if I wasn’t fluent in his native tongue. Being around Pepe, Xabi, and Fernando did wonders since all they did was spoke Spanish around one another.

I use to aggravate me that all three of them would speak in their native tongues with ease not knowing what they were leaving me out of the loop and for Nagore and Yolanda to join didn’t help either. My gaze softened, I wouldn’t trade those moments for the world.

“Seems like Kit has capture Fabregas’ heart”

I stiffened before I turned my head to see Bouchra, Van Persie’s wife. “What are you talking about?” I honestly didn’t want to take her words to heart, I didn’t even know if I should be offended. But the way she was looking at me was not warming at all.

“Don’t play innocent with me Neverline.” She spat “You have Cesc wrapped around your dirty little finger, having Fernando and now wanting Cesc. You fuckin’ sick”

“Bouchra! Back off” Tatiana stepped in front of me blocking my view of the Moroccan; I wanted to say something but the 5’10” tennis player wasn’t having it. “Kit has done nothing to you. Cesc invited Kit as a friend. Nothing more. Nothing less”

Bouchra was furious as her face turned beet red, she seethed “Do you have a mind at all Tati? Cesc and Carla broken up and to find out that Cesc is getting comfortable with this wh-”

“That’s enough!” Tatiana cut in “Sit down and shut up Bouchra. We are here to support our loved ones not get into a petty little fight”

The blond French woman turned to me apologizing for her friend’s rudeness; I thought nothing of it and said it was fine. What the hell was wrong with me? Usually I would give her a piece of my mind but I just stood there, taking blow after blow.

My eyes cast down at my ex-lover. Maybe this was taking more of a toll on me than I thought. Sitting back down we watched the rest of the game with heavy tension. As soon as sat down I wished this game would end quickly because I couldn’t deal with the daggers Bouchra was throwing at me.

I sighed in relief as Arsenal won 2-1 walking side by side with Tatiana to the locker room. My eyesight caught a flicker of blue but thought nothing of it. Feeling the need to use the bathroom I told Tatiana to tell Cesc I would be right back.

She nodded in understanding and continued walking down to the locker rooms. Making a quick right turn I bolted to the nearest bathroom cursing that I didn’t have a strong bladder. After I relief myself and washed my hands I leaned on the sink.

Taking a deep breath, collecting myself before I went back to Cesc and the rest of the group; it was more difficult than I thought. Bouchra was hurt, I knew that. She jumped to conclusions though, thinking that Cesc and I was an item.

Cesc would never jump into another relationship so fast, especially since he loves Carla with all his heart. I don’t know what happened to them but I hope it was for a good reason why they broke up. Carla was a good friend of mine and I would never make a move on Cesc even if I was attracted to him.

It was just plain wrong.

Brushing my light blond hair back, I pulled the door open and started to walk to the Arsenal locker room. As I took the first few steps I stopped in mid-stride when I saw the blue jersey that caught my eye before I excused myself from Tatiana.

My gray eyes stayed planted on the Spaniard that stood in front of me, “Fernando?” I mumbled under my breath.

I thought it was too good to be true. To actually see Fernando after all this time, even if I did just see him on his birthday. It still felt like forever, being in his presence made me feel unworthy. His honey brown eyes locked with mine as he said my name in that accent that I loved so much.

“Kit”

He pushed himself off the wall and started to step towards me; my body stood frozen seeing him pace closer to me. My gaze never wavered, only fixated on the new Chelsea player that stood right in front of me.

“Kit” he said again, in a low voice.

I inhaled deeply, restraining myself from jumping into his arms in that exact moment. I forgot how much I missed his voice, how much I missed him saying my name. Just everything about him sent my world on fire.

“It’s n-nice t-to see you again” I stuttered.

It was awkward tension surrounding us, I knew that it wasn’t going to be natural for us to become comfortable with one another like we use to. “Me too” he murmured “You look… different”

“Thanks.” My eyes scanned his body “You do too” I wanted to slap myself for being so lame. He didn’t change one bit. He was still the nice, quite Spaniard that I met four and a half years ago but he still blushed at my so called compliment.

“I think the only thing that changed was my uniform” he teased, regaining his confidence back.

“So? That’s still change Nando” we both tensed at the nickname. Our joking went a little too far, seeing as our comfort level wasn’t as good as I thought it would be. What I always adored about Fernando was he would be quite as a mouse when you first talk to him before he started to open up to you; when you make a situation awkward he would try to ease into a conversation again.

“Did you enjoy the game?” Fernando asked.

See? I told you. He asked looking like what I said didn’t faze him, but if I didn’t see his reaction to me calling him by his nickname I would have fully believed him.

I licked my lips, “I did. You played well”

Fernando rolled his eyes, “No I didn’t. I played bloody horrible” he ran a hand down his face “I don’t know what is wrong with me”

I felt sympathy towards the older man and without thinking I reached out to him. Putting my pale hand on his, he stiffened before I brought his hand down intertwining it with mine. While the other hand tilted his face towards me.

“You shouldn’t blame yourself all the time Fernando. Everyone makes mistakes, everyone fails some time. You were injured and are still in the process of healing, it could take months or even longer to play to your full potential. Just be patient”

His brown eyes locked with mine as he responded in awe, “Where has this new Kit come from?” he smiled “I like it”

I smiled back “It’s not new, I just have been hiding it for so long” a frown creased on my face “I have just been so guarded that I never let you see it”

I stroked his freckled cheek with my thumb as he leaned toward my touch, “Well then, let her stay…. Because I like this Kit better”

I forced a smile before I heard a woman’s voice, “Nando?” I stiffened seeing Li come around the corner with a confused face before it brightened up when she saw Fernando. I pulled back from him, not seeing the hurt look on his face.

Li came up to Fernando hugging him on a good game even if they lost. She turned to me with a smile “Kit! It’s so nice to see you again. It’s been so long, how have you been?”

“I’ve been great. And you?” I forced a smile at the Asian woman before me. I wanted to wring her neck out but refrained from it, she was Fernando’s new girlfriend and I didn’t want to add to my list of faults while Fernando was around.

I seriously did not want murder to be added onto my list. “Good, good. Listen I was thinking that maybe we could go out to lunch together tomorrow. Just the three of us”

Giving an uncomfortable smile, “Oh I don’t want to intrude-”

“Nonsense! You can bring someone along if it makes you uncomfortable” Li added, she sure wants me to tag along with them.

I reluctantly agreed saying if I found someone I will give her a call. “I’ll see you later. I promised Cesc that I would see him before he left” Fernando flinched as I said the captain’s name but thought nothing of it as I walked away from them.

Out of their sight I realized that my fists were in tight balls the whole time, my fingers relaxed as soon as I reached the locker room. Walking in I just saw a couple of players in there talking, I blinked. I guess I was talking to Fernando longer than I thought or maybe our awkward silence was longer than I thought.

I smiled at my best friend as I hugged him congratulating him on the win. He smirked, “It’s was all thanks to you” he ruffled my hair.

I swatted his hand away playfully, “What do I have to do with your win Fabregas?”

“You motivated me to score a goal and you are officially my lucky charm” I rolled my eyes muttering how I wasn’t anyone’s lucky charm, scratch that. I wasn’t lucky at all. I had bad luck throughout my whole life, why would I start to get good luck? It didn’t make sense.

Glancing back at the Spaniard a grin grew on my face, “Cescy?”

It was his turned to roll his eyes before he answered, “Si?”

“How would you like to go to lunch with me tomorrow?”