Right Through Me

What a Bitch

I scanned the area with cautious eyes looking to find the little girl that shared the same adorable grey eyes as mine. It didn’t matter if her eyes were the same shade as mine I loved her eyes so much more than mine, everything about her I just loved. She was absolutely perfect.

“Kit we need to focus” Fernando brought me back to reality as I saw little kids scattered around the foster care laughing and playing. “We need to talk to Lily remember?”

“I know but” I halted what I was about to say when I saw Fernando giving me a look which shut me up; he was being really tolerate of me today. All this morning I couldn’t help but have my paranoid side kick in, what if Noah took her from me? What if God forbid died in the middle of the night?

Morbid thoughts consumed my mind so much that Fernando had to snap me back to reality so many times I lost count. “She’s fine. Don’t worry”

I narrowed my eyes “She’s fine? I do you know?” walking by his side as we walked down the concrete path that lead to the front office.

“Because she’s sitting next to that tree hugging herself” he pointed his long slender finger at the direction he saw her. My stormy grey eyes followed where he was pointing at to see indeed that little Mai was sitting next to a tree hugging herself as she shyly watched the other children play.

“Oh” I muttered as I apologized to Fernando “Sorry for being testy”

“It’s fine amour. Let’s go” grabbing my hand we continued to walk to the office but I couldn’t help but look back at the tree where my little girl was sitting. If it was up to me I wouldn’t go through all the paper work just to hold her in my arms again. It hurt being so close yet so far away from her.

As we walked up to the front we saw Lily walking out from the side when she saw us she was surprised “Oh I didn’t think you would be here already.”

“Is it a bad time? We were too excited to wait any longer” Fernando covered up for me I should say as a scarlet blush covered my cheeks. I just nodded as Lily laughed “Understandable. It’s quite nerve wracking when you are obtaining the child you gave up, no?”

Her dark eyes looked at me with laughter in her eyes, when I didn’t say anything she cleared her throat as I fidgeted uncomfortably on my feet. “Why don’t you go into that office and I will be right with you. Lucky for you that I brought all the files for Mai”

We nodded as we walked into the small white room waiting for Lily to come back. “I can’t believe she said that to me, did you hear her Nando. What a bitch” I grumbled as my mood turned for the worst, how could she say that right in my face so harshly?

“She probably didn’t mean it in that way.”

“She did I just know it”

Fernando rubbed my arm soothingly “You might be reading into this way too much. Just focus on Mai okay? Doesn’t matter what she thinks, you had your reasons and now you are going to have your daughter back into your life. Don’t let what Lily say ruin this moment”

I took a deep breath, Fernando was right I shouldn’t let some pompous social worker ruin my mood. It was all about Mai at the moment and my thoughts were shattered when the evil woman waltzed in with a manila folder as she sat across from us.

“So this is Mai’s paperwork and Mr. and Mrs. Carter’s will” passing the will over to us “As you can see that Mai will be handed over to you if they ever passed away”

I furrowed my eyebrows as I read the paper “So she doesn’t have any godparents?”

“She used to” that spiked my attention as I looked up at the social worker that folded her hands together in a professional way “Her godparents were Mrs. Carter’s parents but they passed away two years ago. So as you can see that you would be the next in line to obtain your daughter”

I was trying to take this all in as I passed the will back after Fernando and I finished looking at it. “And these are the papers you need to fill out to gain custody over Mai. Will Mr. Torres be doing the same process?”

“Yes” he answered as she gave him a copy of what I had.

It was more paper work for us since we were only a couple and not married “I have to ask before we actually start the process if you and Fernando are citizens in England?”

Licking my lips I glanced at Fernando before answering “Yes we are both citizens.” Lily went on to explain that it was important that the foster parents be legal immigrants or it would cause a real problem with the adoption process.

Going through some of the more simple paperwork we signed a couple of papers and within those two hours I cracked my back before I yawned. Taking the papers with us we thanked Lily for so much of her help.

“No problem. Mai will be under your care in no time” smiling she walked off with the umbrella she had in her hand and walked out of the building.

“Come on, let’s get going” Fernando mumbled as we were forced to walk off the foster care housing. It wasn’t legal to see your adoption child regularly without it being okay with the foster care system and since they are pretty tight around here we decided to leave.

My eyes wouldn’t leave off the property as Fernando turned on the car as we drove away, turning around before my neck started to hurt I muttered “Do you think I will be fit to be a mother?”

So many questions that I had for myself that would be left unanswered until I experience it myself. “Of course, you are terrific with children” he kissed the back of my hand.

I gave him a look “The only kids that I get along with is Pepe’s kids”

“That’s more than enough and that doesn’t even matter because this is our child and she already loves you”

I blinked as it registered what he just said “Did you just say our child?” shock evident in my voice as Fernando looked worried that he offended me in some way.

“Did I say something wrong?”

I shook my head, “No. Our child…I like the sound of that” I murmured to myself as the rain started to patter on the windows as we continued our ride home. When we finally walked into the house I took off my coat when Fernando asked me where I was yesterday when he went to practice.

“At Cesc’s house. What?” raising my shoulders up in defense “I didn’t do anything wrong”

“No but you left without telling me where you were. You just left without saying anything and when I arrived home and you weren’t here I thought something happened to you”

I shrugged “I got bored. Have you seen Cesc’s new squeeze? She’s pretty cute” I got a little sidetracked but I was too happy to even think about Noah or Lily at the moment. All this good news was bound to improve my mood.

Fernando looked confused “New squeeze? What does that mean?”

“It means new boyfriend or girlfriend….wait, you did know Cesc has a new girlfriend right?” I raised my brows when Fernando scratched his head shaking his head.

“No I didn’t. I have been so busy with other things that I haven’t talked to Cesc about anything with that topic since he was sensitive to it the last time I brought it up” I nodded knowing exactly what he was talking about, even though I wasn’t really keeping in touch with him before the break up incident I still was there when it happened.

“So what’s her name? Know anything about her?”

“Well, her name is Kaori Roux and she’s a ballet teacher” I took a bag of chips from the cabinet as I opened the bag and started to munch on some of them “Anything else?” Fernando stealing some of my chips which I sent an evil glares his way.

“She’s half blind” Fernando froze once again not understanding what that meant “I didn’t know what that meant either. Means her vision is limited and if she’s pushed too hard her vision could give out anytime”

“Wow that must be difficult to deal with…who knew Cesc would date someone again after only four months”

I took a bite out of my chip “I know…oh and I told Cesc that when we legally have Mai we should get together so we can meet Kaori and Cesc could meet Mai.”

Fernando agreed as he sat next to me “I was thinking about when we adopt Mai that we can give her a christening.” I started to think about it as he continued “And for the godparents….”

“Oh I want Cesc to be Mai’s godfather hands down” I quickly accepted the idea but I had a rather hard time picking Mai’s godmother. Pursing my lips I thought about it but soon gave up knowing that I was rather stumped “Why don’t you choose her godmother? Since you are going to be her new daddy”

I smiled at him, Fernando looked nervous as he cleared his throat “Alright. I was thinking that maybe Li can be her godmother” that woman’s name made me freeze in place, everything else Fernando said was going out the window as I kept hearing Fernando saying that he wanted Li to be the godmother of our child.
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Fernando has gotten in Kit's bad side again, proposing Li be Mai's godmother how dare he. haha comments?