I Hated You Yesterday

{Jamie}

I wanted to shoot someone; why did Nate have to fall for my best friend? Why exactly did the feeling have to be mutual?

It wasn't even snowing yet and school was already called off: what the fuck? I bet you anything if we had school tomorrow Jasey and Nate wouldn't have decided to go out together. It left me home alone with Kasper, out of all people. At least we had his truck still, Nate drove away in his grey corolla.

"Jamieeeee!" Kasper whined, rapping at my locked door. I rolled my eyes, and set my book down. Standing right behind the door with my hand on the handle, I debated whether to open it or not.

"What?" I said a little too curtly.

"I'm lonely," Kasper said, fast and simple. I could only imagine his face put in a little boy pout with his talented lips jutted forward. I sighed, and gave in; he would have annoyed me through the door anyways.At least if I insulted him I'd be able to see the look on his face.

I swung the door open, and Kasper stood there awkwardly with his hands shoved in his front pockets. His hair was messily swept and outlining his face, and I held back the shy smile. He stepped in, walking slowly and cautiously. I flopped onto my bed, and sat up, with my back rubbing up against the wall. Kasper just stood there, looking at me, and his eyes peeking from under his dark masses of hair.

"What's up?" I said, holding back insult that may have come to mind.

"Uh, nothing really," He shrugged, and sat down with me. Our shoulders were side by side, and I took a glance at him, catching only a glimpse of his long midnight dark hair. I shifted my weight slightly, jostling the bed, as I crisscrossed my legs, laying my hands at my ankles.

"That's sad," I said, and pulled my iPhone from my pocket. Instantly music began to play, and I swayed and bobbed my head, earning me a chuckle from Kasper. I was surprised how civilized we were acting, but we were having these off moments often lately. There was a new created mood among us, lingering in the air. Neither one of us was daring to admit it.

"You wanna go out?" Kasper said, suddenly, that crooked smirk on his face, playing with his lips.

"There are lots of different outs. Which one are you talking about? Out as in outside? Or out, out? Or out on a date as a couple? Humor me," I laughed a dry laugh, but secretly hoped he meant the second option. I just wanted to get out of the house, leaving as friends. The third one was out of the question, we'd murder each other first, and it wouldn't last long as anything.

Sometimes I look at Kasper and wish it would, but then I'd chastise myself. Things will never happen between us, I was planning on keeping that promise.

"Out, out-- get ready," Kasper said, and left me alone in my room. He left so abruptly I barely had any time to question him. With my tunes still playing, I brushed my waves and curls out, and pinched back a part of my bangs. I changed into something more fitting for going out rather than my Pink sweats, and shirt.

I tucked my phone snugly back into my pocket, and met Kasper out in the living room. He was sitting, leaning his arm on the arm rest, and using it to prop up his head for support. The channels flipped by, and I stood there wondering how long it would take him to notice if I didn't say anything.

"Kasper?" I said, and pulled on my hoodie. He turned the TV off, and got up, standing, more like towering in front of me. The world sometimes sucked being short.

"Jamie," Kasper said, his lips murmuring on the top of my head, pressing into my hair.

My irrational mind allowed me to breathe out, "I want you to kiss me again." I wanted to stick my foot up my ass for allowing those vile words to be pushed passed my lips into the open air.

Kasper arched a brow, and I chewed on my bottom lip, fully regretting every word that just slipped passed my lips. Thank god Kasper was a big head, he paused to say, "So, you like this? No one can deny this talent."

I didn't realize how close the proximity of our lips were, barely a hair could fit between us. I racked my brain for the right words, but instead he just made my thoughts all murky that I wasn't able to come up with a single coherent sentence without melting.

And.
Then.
He.
Kissed.
Me.

Again.

That thing called my heart melted into chocolate syrup as I tried to will it to stay together. Kasper kissed me slowly, sweetly even, and almost shyly like he was afraid I would take advantage of this and kick him where no guy should be kicked. My heart kicked into full gear, and sped at full speed trying to win some Olympic race. I was utterly captivated, my attention caught on the way his lips moved against mine.The unreasonable sense of my mind was enjoying this far too much, it completely had the rest of my brain opaque.

The soft creaking sound I disregarded until the shrill shriek followed, "My daughter's a whore!"

I pushed Kasper away, and peered from over his shoulder. He turned his head around to look at the person in the room with us as well.

In her thigh high boots, booty hugging short shorts, and all too revealing halter top my mother stood, her hand on her hip, and eyes raised. She didn't have the drunk man's glaze to her eyes and her words were precise, not all jumbled together, so she was sober too.

I looked real bad at the moment. Really bad-- it was the wrong time and place to request that absolutely amazing, mind spinning kiss.

I smiled meekly, blood rushed into my cheeks filling them with warmth. Kasper and my mom eyed each other until Kasper greeted her. As soon as he did, I wished he hadn't.

"Hey, Ms. Mills! What's up? Can I get a hug?" He opened his arms gesturing for a hug. She just sneered.

"Get the fuck out," My mother, Harlow, snarled. Kasper's shoulders slumped in defeat, but before leaving his lips brushed against my cheek. I was left to face the cat alone, and she was alert, all to ready to pounce.

I sat down, sliding against the wall until my butt met with the floor. I met her eyes before looking away; they were hardened, and menacing.

"Why are you home alone with a boy?" She snapped, and stood in front of me, making me feel even smaller.

"Cause he's Nate's best friend," I mumbled with fear coursing through my veins.

"And where is Nate? Knocking some girl up?" She tapped a heel expectantly. I doubted it, and prayed to god not.

"He's with Jasey," I said, not telling a single lie there was no need.

"Get up," She screeched, I did as commanded, and stood up uneasily. I rocked on the balls of my feet, and met her eye to eye. Those dark brown eyes turned into a dark onyx.

"You little fucking whore. I bet you two fuck all the time because there's no supervision," My mother pushed me up against the wall. She was getting uncomfortably close, and I tried to piece myself together in order to maintain my composure.

"Look whose talking, I'm still a virgin," I struggled under her, but managed to shove her off of me. She looked taken aback, but slapped me across the face.

Harlow Mills definitely did not have a maternal bone in her body. She didn't even have a cell that cared about her kids, her life was the one that revolved around having sex like two jack rabbits.

"Don't you dare talk to your mother like that," Harlow put her hands firmly on her hips and she raised a single thin brown brow.

"You are not my fucking mother. If you were anything mom like you would have stayed around. You would have fucking cared when Kyle broke my heart! You would have cared when Nate took me to the hospital because I had the stomach flu. If you were anything like a fucking mother should be you would have care!" I screamed, my voice rising to meet hers. I threw my hands in the air, and my jaw tensed.

"You little ungrateful bitch, you and your brother should be shipped off to your father!" She retorted back, stepping closer as if to slap me. I challenged her too by stepping up to the plate as well.

"You are never home, maybe once every season, why should we leave? Besides I'm almost a legal adult, there is no point," I snapped, and stood tall. She eyed me, and lifted her manicured nails. I flinched when her palm connected with my cheek. It stung, and I smacked her right back; it send her heels clicking, and stumbling back wards.

"Fine, live here with your loser brother. I won't ever be back, go about being a little whore. You'll end up pregnant, Nate and that boy will leave you. Don't come crying to me." Harlow said, stepping towards the door.

I had enough of dealing with her nonsense bull shit. "I'm not the one who has casual sex every minute for a living. I'm not the one who will fuck any guy who'll pay." It was the harsh truth. She needed to hear it, and it stopped her in her tracks. Her eyes glistened for a moment with hurt, but soon flickered back to her stone cold glare.

I just wanted to break down and cry.

I waited for the rev of the engine, and the crunching of the gravel before I slid my cell out of my pocket and dialed the one person who I wanted most at the minute.

"Kasper," I mumbled, my voice cracking already. I didn't even attempt to keep it together, the ache spread, plunging the knife even deeper. I honestly didn't care how needy I sounded, only Kasper would understand. "I need you."

"Jamie, I'm still here," His voice was soft, and I heard the door groan open. Kasper stepped through, his hair slightly disheveled. I shoved my phone deep down into my pocket again, and ran over to Kasper, attacking him with a hug.

My chest hurt to breath as I tried to control the tears and keep them inside. I wanted to cry, but I didn't like crying in front Kasper. The back of my mind whispered let's test to see if he can handle you at your worst.

I didn't care about anything right now except for the fact I was forced to grow up faster than I should have been, that I had just ruined any relation I had with my mother. It was severed and burned so badly no even holy water could put out the flames.

"Shhh," Kasper whispered, holding me close to him. His body radiated warmth, and I felt my stomach flutter. "I'm here, Jamie. Shhh."

I broke down into tears and spilled my guts out, just pouring and burdening every thought onto Kasper. I had given him enough of my fragile trust that was become more and more frail as life went on. I trusted him enough not to ruin me even more.

"I know how you feel, you're not alone," Kasper said, and ran his fingers through my hair, petting it. The tears eventually came to a halt, and I blinked the remained few clear. Kasper came from a rough family background too, only it was his father that was the problem parent. His mother was shattered and couldn't really care for anything other than her own bleeding heart.

Kasper rebelled and that landed him with me. I was grateful for it. Through out the months we've fought, and pulled awful pranks at each other while he lived under our roof, I was glad to have Kasper.

"I'm s-sorry," I stuttered and rubbed my eyes, taking the makeup with it. Kasper hugged me one more time before I got up off the couch and scurried into the bathroom to clean myself up. I washed away the black tear stains that dried on my face, and dropped some Visine in my eyes to clear up the redness, and reduce swelling. I reapplied my makeup and appeared back out in the living room with a fake smile plastered over my lips.

"You ready to go now?" Kasper asked, cocking his head, and smiled. He looked like that sweet little boy again.

"Sure thing," I said, and walked up to him. Kasper reached for my hand, and laced our fingers together. I liked the way my hand felt like it was made for his because it fit so snugly. He squeezed it gently, and all his warmth came gushing into me by the one little gesture. In the car ride, Kasper blared some of his favorites, underground bands. I couldn't help but to marveled over their talents.

I was nearly filled with joy when we reached the place. I didn't recognize it at first, but it was very messily splattered, and splotchy with different colors. Everything from reds, blues, and yellows to different shades of orange, green, and purple decorated the outside of the building. The abstract design was so unique it would be impossible to replicate. The little building seemed like shack that was covering the view from the gated area behind. Kasper smirked, and pulled me along with him.

Inside the realization occurred, we were going paint-balling. There were men and women of various ages from teens to adult hood carrying around the guns, and loading them will the ammo. Kasper pulled out some cash, and paid up front. The little gun weighed tons more than it looked, and I shifted the weight around in my arms. I was going to fail horribly. Kasper, held his gun with one hand easily, and guided me along.

The arena was just as paint splattered as the rental building itself. I gawked around, and feared for my outfit, no one was wearing protective gear, or cover up suits.

"Here's how you hold it," Kasper adjusted my arms, and showed me how to shoot it. I learned easily and followed along. It was like laser tag, run, hide, shoot only this time we were shooting paint balls. And they stung for a moment when you were hit. After a few shots I got used to it, and had Kasper running from me. Yes, I was a little too trigger happy!

The pop rock melody drifted into the air, She's in no hurry to grow up, cause grown ups they don't understand her. I groaned, wondering what Jasey wanted. She had Nate to keep her distracted, yet she still on insisting on calling me. I leaned up against the wall, and held the phone to my ear, and the gun pointing towards the ground with the other.

"Hello?" I said, a little out of breath from laughing and chasing Kasper around.

"JAMIE!" She shouted, and I held the phone farther from my ear to prevent blowing my ear drum out. "Come to the movies with us tonight."

I'd rather stay home with Kasper. At this point there was no denying how much I actually liked him, yet I still had major urges to insult him every chance I got. I refrained because he was being just too damn sweet lately.

"Uhhm, why?" I said, normally I would have been gung ho about going because it was a chance to get out of the house, but I didn't want to be a third wheel. The two of them wouldn't watch the movie but slip their tongues down each other's throats instead. PDA should be kept to a minimum.

"Cause I have the perfect date for you," Jasey's voice sang with excitement. I remembered her last blind date she set me up with, he was cute without a doubt, but his personality was a failure.

"Okay, see you when...?" I didn't bother to argue otherwise, She would have pestered me until I gave in and went along.

"Eight, meet us there, and bring Kasper, I have a date for him too." You could imagine the smile gleaming brightly off her face just by her voice. She said good bye suddenly and hung up. I pushed the phone back into my pocket, and continued the war.

The unexpected blow in my ass and shoulder hurt like a bitch.

"Fuck you, Kasper," I snapped, and rubbed my butt.

"When and where?" He said with a mischievous smile on his face. He held my gun for me while we walked back into the over sized shed and returned the equipment. I noted that he was nearly covered in head to toe with paint. He deserved it.

"Ugh, shut up, go shove a shovel up your ass," My tone was sour, and my muscles pinched slightly to sit when I settled into the car.

"Awh, Princess, don't be that way," Kasper murmured, his face buried into the side of my hair. I crossed my arms in his car, I raised a brow at my newest pet name, only unlike all the other times there wasn't a hint of distaste, or sarcasm dripping from when he said the word.

"Mm, you always smell so good," Kasper whispered against my hair. He moved his head to plant soft kisses along the side of my jaw, and my inners squirmed and my heart wanted to implode with the tingly electric shock that was sent traveling to every cell in my body when he touched me.

"Stop please," I said in a calm voice. I blinked and turned my head to face him eye to eye. He smiled sweetly again, and gave me my space.

"Had fun?" Kasper said, and steered the truck home.

"Yeah," I said simply and watched the scenery blur.

"Are you going to the movies with Nate, Jasey and your blind date?" Kasper asked an unexpected question. I looked at him, unaware that he had been notified about tonight. I shrugged unsure, when the truth was I didn't like being kissed and then being forced to watch him walk off into the movies with some other girl.

Our theater was famous for it's kiss on the first date, date spot. He'd get kissed by some other girl for sure.

I wouldn't appreciate getting kissed by him that same day.

"I dunno why?" I asked, needing a reason for everything lately.

"Because I don't want to be groped by some bimbo, and I want to go with you. First official date," Kasper said, and interlocked our hands again. I sighed happily, but looked at him, his blue eyes that were so mesmerizing.

"I'll go, but since when did we become something?" I said, and that earned me a huge smile with a little bit of mischief clinging to it. I rolled my eyes, but he just chuckled. Our mostly silent car ride was comfortable, not awkward.

Inside, I scampered inside to wash my hair and change, but Kasper beat me to it. I waited in my room forever, and tried on countless outfits. I settled on a layered blue tank top that was a little loose, but not baggy, it just wasn't tight enough to give away my whole figure. I was modest, plus it left room for imagination for the boys.

I groaned when Kasper still wasn't done with getting ready in the bathroom. I knocked and added in, "Gees, your such a girl. Get out of the bath room."

"Suck my dick!" Kasper quipped, and I rolled my eyes, it was something Kasper would totally say.

"What dick?" I retorted, and chuckled to myself. Kasper opened the door, and sauntered out, he was towel drying his dark messy hair. He walked out shirtless, with only a pair of snug fitting skinny jeans on. I stopped and stared at his lean body, but he had some nicely toned muscles rippling under his skin. Normally I would have been left unfazed, but when you liked someone it was a different story.

"C'mere you," Kasper dragged me away from the bathroom, and I dropped all my stuff. He pulled me onto his lap on the couch and began kissing me. Again. Soft sweet gentle kisses that only I would enjoy this much. His tongue traced my bottom lip and I granted it entrance. Our tongues danced, and damn, I wanted to melt as a whole.

Both our breathing was labored, and shaky. Kasper smirked smugly and kissed me gently again. "And that's when we became something."