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Perfect Guy or Girl that May or May Not Exist

Twelve

Mr. Perfect:

He has to make me laugh
He has to be a perv [cause I know I am]
He had to be honest with me
He can't cheat on me
He has to love Avenged Sevenfold as much as I do

Looks:
Taller than me {I'm 5' 4"}
Dark hair (length depends on what looks good on him)
Hazel eyes [perferably] but any will do
Lots of tattoos
Tons of piercings

Mrs. Perfect:

She has to have a good personality [not snooby or bitchy]
She has to make me laugh and smile
She has to love Avenged Sevenfold
She has to be as big of a perv as me

Looks:
Nice curvy body
Big boobs [REAL I don't like fake]
Tattoos
Piercings
Hazel/Green eyes
Silky soft atleast shoulder length hair {something nice to grab onto}

Yes, I'm bi-sexual.
♠ ♠ ♠
I haven't gotten to meet either Mr. or Mrs. perfect but I, hope that one of them is out there somewhere.