Kiss Me

Opening my eyes slowly, the quiet of my apartment was ruined by the loud thumping of someone banging on the door. Slowly pushing myself off the couch, I went to answer the door. Not before stretching my sore back and fixing my wild hair.

The drool marks on my chest caused me to look at them in disgust before scratching away at them, a surprise belch came out after that, but it felt so good from all the soda last night.

"What the fuck do you want?" I asked impatiently, not really caring who was at the door, only caring that I had some of those bothersome eye crusts in the corner of my eyes.

"Damn Kay. Since that ad, you've been gettin' no ass and not gettin' any prettier." Oh great, Jeff. This meant that Kyle was going to be here too.

Those weren't my thoughts for long as I was pushed back into my own house, losing my footing slightly in the process. Those two would've been burned if I fell.

"I see you've been keeping up with yourself,” I looked at Jeff as he surveyed the place. I knew Kyle was scrutinizing harsher; the boy was a stickler for clean and that was not the state of my apartment right now.

Dirty laundry was all over the floors, I knew the kitchen table was covered in papers, old food containers much like the coffee table in front of the couch was.

"Fuck off, Jeff." Was all I could come up with as a come-back so early in the morning. Usually I had a sharper tongue.

"Is... is that a pimple I see?" Jeff gawked as he pointed to my lower chin, feeling the need to get closer to my face.

Oh hell to the fucking no. I don't do blemishes. That skin you see is au natural; no air-brushing for this boy. I didn't even bother to say anything before running back into the bathroom and immediately washing my face.

Drying my face off, I inspected it for the pimple he was talking about. There was so such thing. Though my face did feel a whole hell of a lot better after washing the copious amounts of grease that was just sitting on it.

Running back into my living room, Jeff and Kyle were crackin' up. My eyes turned to slits as I glared at them.

"Fuck you two to hell. Fuck you two so hard," I spat at them, fuming. This was not my week. I wasn't getting laid; I was getting accused of being gay constantly; I wasn't getting nearly as much work as I usually do. Just a downright fucking mess.

"Come on." Jeff tried to lighten the mood; make me laugh with him. It wasn't working. It won't be working anytime soon.

"Come on, Kay,” Kyle said in his usual soft voice. He might not have said it actually.

"Whatever,” I scoffed at the two, "what did you guys want?" I asked, changing the subject. I knew that any more talk of this and I would blow their heads off.

"There's a new club. Maybe you can finally get some ass,” Jeff mocked me, winking several times over and punching me in the shoulder.

"Fine, whatever,” I sighed, not caring. I just wanted to find a place to get ass. I'm used to bringing a girl a night. Now, I haven't brought in shit since that ad. It was getting real old, real fast.

"But first, we're getting Kyle over here new clothes because he's lost like twenty pounds in two days,” Jeff said as he pointed over to Kyle. All he did was shrug. Though Jeff had a point. He was looking a whole lot skinnier than usual.

Though that didn't mean I was going to enjoy it more. I hated shopping. The need to run all over the place, try everything on. It was just a waste of time to me. By the time we were done with it all, Kyle had a wardrobe to last him months without wearing the same thing twice.

"Can we get out of here and go to the club?" I groaned, wanting to get out of here. This was supposed to be the "last store". So were the last five.

"I guess. This place opens early,” Jeff said as he glanced down at his watch. Looking at mine I saw it was nearing seven. "First we have to bring stuff back to Kyle's place."

Kyle always felt the need to instantly wash and but away his clothes after buying them. With the amount of clothes, this was going to take a while. We ended up getting Chinese take-out from a place down the road. It was pretty shitty, but better than nothing.

"So I wanna know, how to chicks turn you down? Do they like laugh in your face?" Kyle questioned as he slurped down a few noodles.

"Ugh. They go tee hee hee "you're gay right?" tee hee hee. Fucking annoying," I ranted. That was basically how I got turned down every time. Though one time it ended up in some girl pouring her drink on me.

"Ew. I don't even know why you go for the blondes, man," Jeff added in his two cents as he ate a piece of shrimp.

By the time we were done eating and doing the laundry, it was close to nine. A lot quicker than I expected actually. Jeff was driving now since he knew there the club was.

After a few minutes of driving, I looked out the window and saw a part of town I didn't recognize. It made me feel a bit unsafe actually; I pretty much lived in town.

"Where the fuck are we?" I asked after we exited the car and were walking towards the club.

"Just another part of town," Jeff brushed off, not giving me much of a hint.

I just went with it and followed him. Jeff always seemed to know what he was doing when it came to clubs.

Only this time it was a big fucking prank. Just a big o' joke. I could tell it was the moment I walked in and there was a massive swarm of dudes kissing each other.

"Jeff I'mma fucking kill you," I fumed, turning my heel to look at Jeff. Only Jeff and Kyle were too busy laughing their asses off to notice.

"We thought you'd appreciate their company since they're more like you, eh?" Jeff was simply milking this for all it was worth.

That was the last straw. Pulling my arm back, I punched Jeff right in the face. I punched him a few good times before walking out into the streets.

"Fucking Jeff and his stupid fucking pranks. Fucking fuck." I was fuming. This was the last thing that I need with what has been happening for the last week.