In to the Shadows

By the time we got to South Dakota we had everything figured out.

Bobby had secured us a house just down the road from his. It wasn't anything special nor did we want it to be. Yeah our kids lived in a very nice house their whole lives but that wasn't how we were raised and we didn't want them growing up thinking they were privileged kids. We had money but we didn't have a lot of it. We had enough to make it by.

Kiley was driving her car, her Camaro we fixed up for her back at Bobby's, and was following the kids, Riley and I in our SUV. We had a trailer hooked up to it that was filled with all our crap. On top of the trailer, the SUVs trunk, and Kiley's car, my dad had a trailer hooked up to his truck filled with more of our crap. Having two small children and a teenager meant you accumulated a lot of stuff. And more then ninety percent of it held no importance to any of us.

"Mommy, we almost there?" Cole asked.

I looked at him in the rear view mirror. "Yes sir! A few more minutes and we'll be at the new house."

Chloe excitedly clapped. "New house gots swing?"

"I don't know, love," Riley answered. "But maybe we could get in a few weeks. Does that sound good?"

They both nodded. "Sounds like plan Stan!"

We both shook our heads. Jimmy. They'd spent way too much time with him in their three almost four years of life. And Johnny. Hell. All the guys had ruined them. Cole's first word was fuck. Matt's doing. Chloe's was shit. Johnny's doing. We might have thought it was funny in the moment, but now as we matured as parents we didn't think it was so funny.

"Mommy, who's Stan?"

I snorted. Riley shook her head. "He's a man with a plan, Chlo," she answered.

"Oh." She went back to looking out the window. Cole shifted his gaze from the window and started kicking my seat. "Mama, is Stan nice?" He asked.

Oh lord. "Yeah, uh... he's a really nice guy, Cole."

"Mkay." And that was that. They dropped the subject. "Can we listen to Uncle JimJam?" Riley put in Avenged's newest album Hail to the King.

"I want the King song!" Cole exclaimed. Chloe nodded and they both started chanting, "King song! King song! King song!"

Riley sighed. "Woah, okay, alright, calm it down. Lower the voices kiddles." They immediately snapped their mouths shut and looked at her with those adorable faces that got them anything they wanted. She grinned. "That's better."

Watch your tongue or have it cut from your head
Save your life by keeping whispers unsaid
Children roam the streets, now orphans of war
Bodies hanging in the streets to adore

Royal flames will carve a path in chaos,
Bringing daylight to the night
Death is riding into town with armor,
They've come to take all your rights

Hail to the king, hail to the one
Kneel to the crown, stand in the sun
Hail to the king

A revving engine sounded over the music and looking to my left, I saw Kiley speed by and flip us the bird. She knew her way around these parts so she didn't need to continue following us.

"She's an idgit."

"What's an idgit?" Cole and Chloe both asked. Riley whacked my shoulder. "Way to go," she hissed, before turning to face the kids. "It's nothing and that's a bad word, so don't say it, okay?"

"Okay."

Blood is spilt while holding keys to the throne
Born again, but it's too late to atone
No mercy from the edge of the blade
Dare escape and learn the price to be paid

Let the water flow with shades of red now
Arrows black out all the light (light)
Death is riding into town with armor,
They've come to grant you your rights

Hail to the king, hail to the one
Kneel to the crown, stand in the sun
Hail to the king


"Remind me why we decided to come back here in the middle of fall?" I whined.

Riley rolled her eyes. "Shut up and help us bring in all our crap."

Cole and Chloe were playing sword fighting with a few fallen sticks in the yard. Kiley standing watch, making sure they didn't stab each other in the face and poke an eye out. I've seen it happen and it isn't pretty.

"Why aren't the god damn men doing all the heavy lifting? We should be in there unpacking not unloading," I huffed. I was going to throw a Jimmy Sullivan sized tantrum and it wasn't going to be pretty.

We carried boxes inside and dropped them in the living room. The guys bounded down the stairs, chattering about who knows what. My dad took one look at us and said, "You girls start unpacking. We'll finish unloading all the stuff."

"Thank god," I mumbled under my breath. We headed too the kitchen. I started unpacking the pots and pans while Riley did the plates and silverware. Once we finished that, we moved on to the kids' room. They were sharing a room seeing as this place only had four rooms. Kiley had her room, I had mine, and Riley had hers.

We hadn't fully allowed Sam and Dean back in our lives. Sure we told the kids they were their dad's, but that didn't mean that we wanted to jump back into a relationship. That meant not living with them. And there were things that I knew they weren't telling us. My dad and Uncle Bobby were too. But they didn't let me know it. They kept their minds preoccupied with other things. The only reason I knew they were keeping things from me because Sam slipped up and thought about our reactions. Before I could see what the reactions were to, he quickly started thinking about something else.

It never occurred to me that Kiley would or could be given a power. But the day she hit eighteen, she was given one. She had visions. Like Sam, but different. For her, it was like she was seeing things through the other persons eyes. She was living through what they did. Before and after it happened. And sometimes it came to her in dreams and others it came when she touched the person. So when she came inside with the kids and told us everything that had happened with Sam and Dean in the last few years, we were shocked.

Dean had went back to Lisa and her son. They'd played house for a year or so. They were practically married. Sam went to Hell and came back. He went rogue. He got back with his family that was supposed to be dead and they all went insane. Sam had no emotions, but Dean talked Death into giving it back to Sam. How the hell do you talk Death into something? I mean, honestly. And then they found us and expected us to go back to how we were before we left all that time ago.

"What the fuck?" Riley and I mumbled. The kids' room was all unpacked. Their small beds were in their corners and all made up. Cole jumped up on his bed and burrowed under the covers, as did Chloe. "Me take a nap, Mama," Cole said.

"Me too," Chloe echoed. All three of us nodded, kissing their foreheads before leaving the room and closing the door behind us. "I found this in the Impala," Kiley spoke, holding out some pictures. I took a few and Riley took the rest.

My heart broke. Dean looked happy. He looked like he belonged with them. He had the apple pie life that he always wanted. And it wasn't with me. And that broke my heart into a million tiny little pieces. He got to watch that kid of hers grow up. But his son, his own flesh and blood, he didn't. I know it was my fault, but in my defense he told me he didn't want kids and I was young and stupid. And maybe I should've told him about Cole as soon as I found out, but that would've put my son in danger. I didn't want my child being raised in this life. I was and I didn't like it. Sam and Dean were and they didn't like it. Cole didn't deserve to be forced to grow up so fast.

"Maybe this was a bad idea."