Enchant Me, Please

I groaned and ran my fingers through my hair.

I couldn't believe I had just bitched at one of Chris's best friends. I'm so fucking stupid. He's never going to talk to me now. Hell, I wouldn't want to talk to myself. I groaned again and replayed what he told me over and over again in my head.

“What the fuck Oliver!? If I were you, I would shut the fuck up, cuz first of all, you have nothing to do with my friends coming over....

He's right. Why did I even get mad for? And as far as I knew, Claud was for the opposite gender. Was this jealousy?

And please, just leave. I don’t want to see you right now. Not right after what just happened yesterday.”

The moment he had spoken those words, my heart felt like it was being ripped in two. I'm such a girl.

I sighed and walked over to my guitar, gently pulling it out of its case. I smiled as I looked at her. She was my favorite. She always has been. I remember teaching Christopher how to play her. I smiled, brushing my fingers where he had placed his.

I sat back down on my bed and quickly tuned her. After I had strummed a few random notes, the sudden urge to sing overpowered me.

"I wish I could lay down beside you when the day is done,"

I sang softly, my voice going down to a whisper.

"And wake up to your face against the morning sun. But like everything I've ever known, you disappear one day. So I spend my whole life hiding my heart away."

I didn't realize I was crying until a tear fell on my guitar. I brought a hand up to my eyes, wiping at them but no matter how hard I tried, the tears just kept coming out.

Why? Why am I suddenly feeling like this?

I set my baby down by the side of my bed and stood up, heading towards the bathroom. I looked around the hallway, making sure Chris was no where near. Sighing, I walked into our restroom and looked at myself in the mirror. Sure enough, my eyes were puffed up and glossy, my nose was red, and my cheeks were tear stained. I shook my head and turned on the faucet, quickly soaking my face in icy cold water. I need to stop this. No matter how hard it's going to be. I can't go on living like this.

"Dammit Oliver fucking Starr. Stop being such a wuss."

I muttered under my breath.

Then I heard a small gasp from the door.

"Ollie? Are... Are you crying?"