Gotta Lose 'Til You Win
little blue cab
Boardwalk carnivals are always the best place to be during the summer.
The booths are loud and bright with their vendors calling out to the little ones and their families that passed by.
The children are yelling to their parents about cotton candy or how they absolutely need Daddy to win that little stuffed animal for them.
The teenagers are acting as though this is the most terrible thing to happen to them all year, but they're just as excited as the little kids around them.
The elderly that dare to risk dealing with all of these youngsters shuffle quietly from different sights around the pier, smiling at memories they have of the places.
The Ferris wheel is where I can be found. It is my favorite part about the carnival.
The fact that I’m waiting in line for the ride should be quite alarming if you knew my fear. My severe fear of heights. Only once in my whole life have I ever kept my eyes open and gotten off without tears in my eyes.
However, tonight I am fearless. I must prove that I’m okay and everything will be alright.
When I get to the front, I politely ask the attendant if I could wait for the little blue cab with the white numbers of thirteen written along the side.
At his response, I move to stand next to him to wait. He's young and seems to have the same little spark that I knew for a short time. I wish to say something to him, but stop myself.
Number thirteen finally comes up to plate and the boy moves to unlock the door. I step out of his way and continue to wait.
Once the couple is off, he beckons me forward and I thank him with a grateful smile. He locks the door and tries to explain the rules to me; I cut him off and inform him that I've been here before and remember them. He nods and walks off to the podium.
I wait until he is out of view before I close my eyes and wait for it to start to move.
The first lurch is always the worst.
I grip the seat with both hands and bend my head down.
“You have to open your eyes to see the sunset, Adriana.”
I smile softly to hear him whisper gently to me like he did just a few years ago.
As I ascend to the top, my mind drifts back to those bright times.
The booths are loud and bright with their vendors calling out to the little ones and their families that passed by.
The children are yelling to their parents about cotton candy or how they absolutely need Daddy to win that little stuffed animal for them.
The teenagers are acting as though this is the most terrible thing to happen to them all year, but they're just as excited as the little kids around them.
The elderly that dare to risk dealing with all of these youngsters shuffle quietly from different sights around the pier, smiling at memories they have of the places.
The Ferris wheel is where I can be found. It is my favorite part about the carnival.
The fact that I’m waiting in line for the ride should be quite alarming if you knew my fear. My severe fear of heights. Only once in my whole life have I ever kept my eyes open and gotten off without tears in my eyes.
However, tonight I am fearless. I must prove that I’m okay and everything will be alright.
When I get to the front, I politely ask the attendant if I could wait for the little blue cab with the white numbers of thirteen written along the side.
At his response, I move to stand next to him to wait. He's young and seems to have the same little spark that I knew for a short time. I wish to say something to him, but stop myself.
Number thirteen finally comes up to plate and the boy moves to unlock the door. I step out of his way and continue to wait.
Once the couple is off, he beckons me forward and I thank him with a grateful smile. He locks the door and tries to explain the rules to me; I cut him off and inform him that I've been here before and remember them. He nods and walks off to the podium.
I wait until he is out of view before I close my eyes and wait for it to start to move.
The first lurch is always the worst.
I grip the seat with both hands and bend my head down.
“You have to open your eyes to see the sunset, Adriana.”
I smile softly to hear him whisper gently to me like he did just a few years ago.
As I ascend to the top, my mind drifts back to those bright times.
♠ ♠ ♠
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