Leave Me Alone (I'm Lonely)

"Seriously, what is with all these people turning up at the last minute," I said, rolling my eyes. "Honestly."

"Camilla's here?" Charlie asked and I looked at him surprisingly.

"How did you manage to get that from what I just said?" I questioned him, raising an eyebrow.

"She sent me a text asking me if I was going today," he said, not moving from where he was. "I was also on the other end of a call from Debbie, as Camilla was, to be one of Tommy's grooms men. "

I glared at Debbie who sighed and said, "I really need that drink now."

"Have as much as you want at the reception but right now, I need to know why you were organising Tommy's grooms me as well as my bridesmaids," I said. "I thought it was mean to be Adam's job at least since Tommy had chosen Adam to be his best man and to help him out with these kinds of things like I had chosen you. What is going on, Debbie?"

"Can we not talk about this?" Debbie said as she ushered me towards Charlie who stood by the door, not moving. "We have a wedding to get to."

I stopped halfway to the door and stopped Debbie, saying, "I need to know otherwise I am going to spend the rest of the time worry about why Adam couldn't do his job properly."

Debbie hesitantly looked to Charlie who nodded firmly, saying, "She at least needs to know, Debbie. She deserves to."

"The reason why Adam 'couldn't do his job properly'," Debbie said with a sigh as she turned to me. "Was because he was helping Tommy organise the honeymoon. I am not going to tell you where he is going to be taking you or what is going to be happening but that was what he was doing the entire time."

He was organising the honeymoon. I was hoping to go after the children was born but if we were planning to have a honeymoon, sooner rather than later seemed like the most logical choice. I wasn't sure, either, if he was still planning on taking me to Mexico or not but the thought of it having a lot of planning seemed like a bit much. I gave Debbie a questioning glance as she rolled her eyes and ushered me towards Charlie who helped me down the stairs. I mean, seriously, how much effort did it take to plan a honeymoon? A booking at a hotel and a flight there, that was it, wasn't it? I began to wonder what else had planned for us. My thoughts then went to Charlie who held my hand as we walked down the stairs to the small room in between the stairs and the studio.

My heart was still hurting a little from when he rejected my forgiveness of Adam and when he stormed out on the double date that we had with Tommy and Adam. I wasn't sure what was happening between him and Adam but I had to push that all to the past as I saw the lines of people outside the small room. There was a small bridge going over the pool to where Tommy stood at the top of the stairs, the bridesmaids and groomsmen lining up at the edge of the steps with flowers leading all the way to the bottom of the stairs. People were seated across the backyard and waited for me to take a step out of the door to walk down the makeshift aisle.

When Charlie, Debbie and I reached the bottom of the stairs, we found Adam there. He stiffened when he saw Charlie coming down the stairs first. I glared at him to relax as Charlie walked to the door. They nodded to each other as an acknowledgement before Charlie left the smallness of the room and walked brusquely to the stairs where Tommy was waiting. He quickly said something to Tommy before he took his place a few steps down and folded one hand over the other. I nodded to Debbie that she was okay to leave and she moved from her spot behind me and paused by Adam. She studied him a moment before she kissed him upon the cheek and rested her fingers upon the spot she kissed. There eyes were connected for a moment too long before she fled from the room and walked across the makeshift bridge to the stairs and took her spot upon a stair the second from the top. I saw her settle herself as many of the eyes from the crowd turned to where Adam and I now stood.

Adam's eyes finally rested upon me and a large smile creased his face. His bright blue eyes sparkled as he extended his hand to me and I slowly took a step to him. I noticed, as I took a step, that my anklet jangled. So much for not being seen, and only to be heard instead. As we waited a few moments, hand in hand and watching the guests rising from the seats, Adam said to me, "Tommy is going to love you when he sees what you're wearing."

"How can you be so sure?" I asked as Adam went to open the door and my heart beat faster.

"It makes your boobs look amazing," Adam said with a laugh and I almost kicked him.

"If you weren't gay, I would punch your head in," I said as I heard a small orchestra playing Vivaldi's 'Spring' as we began to walk up the aisle. "And I'm guessing my father or Anthony didn't turn up, either."

"Oh, no, they're here," Adam said as we walked hand in hand. "They just thought it would be better if I took you up the aisle since I knew you better than either of them and considering that one of them is your father, too. Now, sush with your questions and just focus on looking beautiful."

I smiled at this as we walked over the bridge. I felt the rose petals underneath my feet as I walked, my train pulling along the ground and shifting some of the petals as Adam and I walked. I noticed that each of the rows were connected with bunches of white bloomed roses. Around the Greek style pillars that held up the porch roof were flowers and along the railing, also. There were rose bushes and beautiful plants all around the backyard that I hadn't noticed before that complimented everything that had been set up. The small orchestra played in the corner of the porch and their sound projected well across the backyard.

As I looked around the crowd, I noticed my father in the back corner of the crowd with two heavily armed body guards sitting either side of him. I smiled weakly at him as I continued to walk up the aisle without him. Soon enough, I found Anthony and Mary sitting in amongst those in the front row. Mary refused to look at me as I walked towards her row but Anthony gave me a small smile as I approached, nudging Mary to look but she didn't relent. This saddened by heart a little but there was nothing I could do. Mary had bought all of this pain upon herself and no one else.

I smiled at each of the people that I passed but my attentions soon focused on the handsome man that I would soon call my husband at the top of the stairs. I could see his grinning face as I began to walk up the stairs with Adam. I could see Tommy's eyes sparkling with happiness as we reached the top of the stairs and I turned to Adam slightly. Adam pulled off my veil and studied my face a moment before he kissed both cheeks. He smiled and rejoined the groomsmen, taking the step opposite Debbie who looked at him with a raised eyebrow. I smiled at this as I turned to Tommy whose eyes studied me up and down. I blushed slightly as his eyes sparkled with it's chocolately goodness. We turned to the well dressed priest in front of us. I knew he didn't believe but it was noble of him to have someone like the priest do a brief reading and bringing us together as a couple.

The priest began a reading as my hands gripped together nervously. I felt the eyes of the guests upon Tommy and I as well as a photographer, who happened to be Debbie's 'partner', the man that she had eloped with all those years ago that made her parents practically disowned her. I pulled my head up from the ground and looked up, trying to look 'beautiful' as Adam had said. I doubted that I was but I had to take his word for it and by the way that Tommy looked at me, his words proved true. The priest finished his bible verse and looked to Tommy and I with a large smile, closing his bible as Tommy and I turned to each other. Tommy took my hands as he gave me a warm smile. Now, we would say our vows.

"Kassandra, to say I love you is not enough," Tommy began, saying his vows to me. "To try and condense the depth of my feelings into a few words is impossible but what I can say is that I promise to be with you always, to care for you, and to love you no matter how far apart we may be. I will be with you in your heart, and keep you safely in mine. When you are happy, I will be happy with you. When you are sad, I will make you smile. I will encourage you to continue growing as an individual as we work toward our mutual goals. I love you for who you are, Kassandra. I promise to support you in the good and the bad. I promise to appreciate you, and us, as we journey through the rest of our lives. I am proud to stand with you as your friend and husband."

I chocked up with pride and sadness that Tommy could actually write something so beautiful. I had to push back the tears that threatened me. Around me, I could see Adam's face tensing to prevent his tears from falling. Behind me, Debbie sniffed and held an tissue to her eyes along with a few other bridesmaids and those in the crowd. There was nothing I could do to come back to something like that but what I did say, I said from the bottom of my heart and with all honesty. I tried my best to live up the the standard that Tommy had set.

"Tommy Joe," I said, taking a deep breath as I spoke. "You are my best friend and my one true love. When I´m with you, I feel I can be the person I want to be, and I cannot imagine my life without you. You make me smile, you stick up for me, you take care of me and you are always interested in what I have to say and do. You are honest and wise. You are my strength and you are kindhearted. You always love me no matter what. You have always managed to help me through bad times and I cannot imagine my life without you. Today, I want to make a promise to you and to myself, in front of our friends and family, to love and honour, protect and respect you for the rest of my life. I am proud to stand with you as your friend and wife."

I could see Tommy begin to tear, his fingers rubbing against my small hands as the priest said from beside us, "If anyone wishes for the marriage between Tommy-Joe and Kassandra not to be, speak now or forever hold your peace."

There was silence amongst the crowd and when the priest was going to continue, someone spoke out. Camilla. As she moved up to us, I turned around and punched her right in the face. I was sick of her whining about how she couldn't have Tommy. She had lost him and she couldn't let it go. He clearly didn't love her if he was standing up here with me, saying his vows of beauty and grace. I watched her stumble down the stairs, crumpling as she did so. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, she shifted slightly so that she looked up at us with a bloodied lip and spat to the side, contaminating the stairs with her blood. She made a low growling noise as she thrust herself back up the stairs towards Tommy and I but she was pulled back by Adam and Charlie.They pulled her off to the side as she screamed, "You never deserved him! He belongs to me you little whore! I should be the one that he is marrying! Get your hands off me you assholes."

Her screams died as she was taken into a room to the side as Tommy and I looked to back to each other. I could see he had become hesitant, that something had changed in him. My heart dropped as a sudden realisation came over me. Was he having cold feet? Was he regretting what he had said to me only moments earlier? Did he really love Camilla instead of me and was marrying me in spite of his desires? Was he using me to cover his feelings for Camilla and separating himself forevermore from her?

"Kassandra," Tommy said and with that one word, my heart was pulled out and stomped upon multiple times. With one word, I just couldn't do it.