Status: Rewrite! Yay!

Under the Bright Chicago Lights

Chapter 1

The lights of Chicago sparkled brightly from below me. I smiled as I stared out of the hotel window and stared out at the skyline. I loved watching the lights below me; it was much more inspiring to watch the night lit up almost like the sun was still out. I sat on the windowsill and pressed my forehead against the cool glass. A light snow was beginning to fall outside. There was a knock on the door. Sighing softly, I pulled myself away from the beautiful skyline and opened the door to a smiling face and strawberry blond curls. I grinned and hugged my best friend, Patrick Kane, tightly. Patrick and I had known each other since we had grown up next door to each other in Buffalo. I had gone to Chicago this trip to see him, but I hadn’t expected him to find my hotel this early in my trip.

“Patty!” I exclaimed. He laughed, and I closed the door as he walked into my hotel room.

“So, what’s up, Rosie?” he asked.

“I was watching the city from my window and trying to get some inspiration for my drawing,” I answered. “So, what happened to you? Did you get turned down again?” I asked.

“She never even bothered to show up at the restaurant,” he said, the color fading from his cheeks and the smile sliding off of his face and out of his eyes. I ran at him and tackled him to my couch.

“You know what that means!” I said in a singsong voice. “Ice cream and movie time!” He laughed, and the light returned to his eyes as he picked me up, grabbed my suitcases and art supplies and carried me to his car.

“I’ll be right back,” he said. I sat and waited, and he came back a short time later. “All checked out. Off to my apartment!” he cried. I laughed and we sang along to the radio the entire way to his apartment.

"Race you upstairs!" I cried. We raced each other up the stairs and me, being as clumsy as I am, tripped and fell into his apartment door.

“Ow,” I said, rubbing my head. The door flew open and I fell into his apartment. I gave a small scream as I found myself on the ground at the feet of Pat’s roommate and captain, Jonathan Toews. He smiled and shook his head. “What? Pat and I raced each other up here and I tripped and fell into the door, and then you whip it open and scare the shit out of me,” I explained. He laughed as he helped me to my feet and pulled me into a hug. “So Captain Serious does laugh!” I said. He rolled his eyes.

“It’s good to see you too, Rose,” he said. Pat came ambling into the apartment at that moment and shielded his face with his hands playfully.

“Not in front of the best friend, guys!” he said. I hit him on the arm playfully.

“Do you want me to stay for ice cream and movie time or not?” I threatened, immediately regretting it. The laughter fell away from his face, his eyes lost their usual sparkle and he reached toward me. I stepped away from Jon and immediately engulfed my best friend in a hug. “What would you do without me, seriously?” I asked.

“Fall apart,” he responded. “I would seriously fall apart without you.” He hugged me a little tighter and we pulled away, heading to his couch where Andrew Ladd, Brent Seabrook and Brian Campbell sat.

“Okay boys, off the couch. Best friends, chick flicks and ice cream time,” I said. Andrew grinned and shook his head as he got off the couch. Brent and Brian looked at me and shook their heads. “Look, he got stood up by some stupid girl who couldn’t see that he’s totally worth it, so off the couch,” I said. Pat’s grip on my waist tightened as I said the words. Brent got up and sat on the floor in front of the couch, but Brian refused to move.

“Give me a better reason than that if you want me to move,” he said cockily. I rolled my eyes at him. He seemed to always find a way to aggravate me, and now was definitely not the time for that.

“Brian, please don’t be mean to her,” he said. Brian got off the couch and brushed past me on his way out. “He only messes with people he likes,” Pat said.

“I don’t like him. He’s cocky and he’s an ass,” I said.

“He really is a nice guy, though. Just give him a chance, Rosie,” Pat said. I sighed.

“Fine. But he has to be nice, too, otherwise I won’t do it,” I said.

“You’re the best, Rosie! You two would be perfect for each other, I know it!” Pat said, hugging me. I wasn’t as sure as he was, since Brian was almost never nice to me. I sat next to Pat on the couch and we popped in The Notebook. I had a box of tissues next to me for when we both started crying, and that was how we started the best friend cuddle time.
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So, here's the rewritten first chapter! Constructive criticism is always welcome! Thoughts? Should I keep going?