When the World Gets Blurry
Alaina
I don't know why I did it.
Most people would consider me lucky, and I guess I agree. I am luckier than most, but still not as lucky as some. My family is still together, happy and healthy for the most part. We don't have money problems, but what we lack in some problems, we make up in others.
My dad and I never got along, my mom always said we were too similar and in some ways we are, but it's not the ways that we're similar that are important; it's the ways we're different. We're both smart and opinionated, impatient and stubborn, irrational and spontaneous. But my dad had something growing up that I always lacked; motivation. The drive to push himself to succeed. That drive you need in order to go to Harvard, to become a successful lawyer, to raise a family of your own, to be fucking perfect.
I could have been all those things.
It was a shame I wasn't. In life there's always choices, and then choices that result from the original choice. I could have been just as successful as my father and maybe even more. I could have focused on college and packed for Harvard like I was supposed to. I could have pushed myself into being the best person I could be like my parents wanted me to be. But once you hit a certain age realization dawns on you and you ask, do I really want this?
I guess I just realized earlier than most.
Most people would consider me lucky, and I guess I agree. I am luckier than most, but still not as lucky as some. My family is still together, happy and healthy for the most part. We don't have money problems, but what we lack in some problems, we make up in others.
My dad and I never got along, my mom always said we were too similar and in some ways we are, but it's not the ways that we're similar that are important; it's the ways we're different. We're both smart and opinionated, impatient and stubborn, irrational and spontaneous. But my dad had something growing up that I always lacked; motivation. The drive to push himself to succeed. That drive you need in order to go to Harvard, to become a successful lawyer, to raise a family of your own, to be fucking perfect.
I could have been all those things.
It was a shame I wasn't. In life there's always choices, and then choices that result from the original choice. I could have been just as successful as my father and maybe even more. I could have focused on college and packed for Harvard like I was supposed to. I could have pushed myself into being the best person I could be like my parents wanted me to be. But once you hit a certain age realization dawns on you and you ask, do I really want this?
I guess I just realized earlier than most.
♠ ♠ ♠
Not sure how I feel about this one, I'm mainly just trying to introduce Alaina and develop her a little bit. I'll probably go back and change it later depending on your reactions, so please comment and tell me what you think<3Say no to silent reading.
~Kathleen