Wounds That Won't Heal

Ray went out of the room and went back to the bigger room he had been in before. He saw Mikey talking to Frank who was smiling at Mikey as he spoke and together the two laughed. Ray felt a stab of jealousy as he saw the two share a joke and, even though he didn’t know it, he scowled. He shook his head knowing that what he felt wasn’t right but it didn’t make the feeling go away, “I shouldn’t be here,” he muttered darkly and to himself.

“Where should you be?” Bob asked having heard the statement on the way past. He hadn’t seen where Ray was looking so he had taken the statement literally. He peered at Ray over his arms full of equipment, “I mean, what job are you doing? I know this place quite well so I can maybe take you where you need to be.”

Ray could have laughed at the innocence of the question but he choked it back, “thanks Bob but I think I can work it out.”

Bob shrugged, “fair enough,” he continued on his way leaving Ray alone with his thoughts once more.

Frank had vanished when Ray looked back over and so he crossed to Mikey, “Mikey can we…? Um, do you have a minute?”

Mikey only had to look at Ray to realise the situation was serious. He sighed, instantly expecting the worst, “I can always spare time for you Ray,” he said as he nodded slightly. He followed Ray into the room Ray had been in with Gerard earlier. Gerard was gone though so when the door closed the two were alone. Mikey fidgeted slightly, keeping his distance from the other man even though deep down all he wanted to do was take him in his arms and hug him. “Ray…”

“Please Mikey, listen to me,” Ray pleading, trying not to look at Mikey, “I am trying to be your friend and believe me, there is nothing I want more,” he paused and took a deep breath, “it is difficult though and I want you to know that it isn’t your fault that it isn’t working.”

“It isn’t just you I am sure,” Mikey said and took a step towards Ray. Ray jumped back and Mikey furrowed his brow in confusion, “Ray?” he waited for a reply but none seemed forthcoming, “please Ray…,” he broke off with a sigh, “please…”

Ray looked at his shoes as he shuffled his feet, “this is just me and I don’t want to do something I shouldn’t; something I will regret,” he paused and stepped back as Mikey stepped forward to rest his hand on Ray’s arm, “I can’t do this... I shouldn’t be here right now.”

Mikey looked hurt by the apparent rejection, “I won’t let you walk away from your dreams Ray,” he said quietly looking steadily at Ray’s lowered head, “I wouldn’t then and I won’t now. Not without a fight and then… well, I don’t want to think about the what then,” he reached and grabbed Ray’s hand with both of his, “look at me Ray.”

“I…,” Ray began as he raised his head. His brown eyes shining with unshed tears met the chocolate eyes filled with inner hurt. The argument died on his lips as he got lost in those eyes.

Wordlessly the two men stepped into each others arms and their lips locked in a forbidden kiss full of longing.