The Little Things Give You Away

The next morning I woke up with a throbbing heading. What...happened? I squinted my eyes a little but then decided it was a bad idea as the light came flooding in. I quickly closed them tight again to stop the burning. A second later I realized that I wasn’t in my own room. I couldn’t have been. It’s warm in here and my house is always freezing. Where am I?

Just then I felt something that I probably should’ve noticed straight away. I'm not leading against a wall; it’s a frigging person. His muscular arms are wrapped around me, almost in a protective kind of way and I can feel his breath at the back of my neck.

This can’t be happening. I thought yesterday was my night off, but it looks like mum must’ve sent me off to some guys house. Oh God. I bet he drugged me or something. Why the hell can’t I remember getting here?

Another thing that’s strange about this is how the guy’s holding me. Usually we’d just, you know, do it and leave it at that. This is so weird, but it’s making me feel really nervous as well. Is it wrong that I feel comfortable right now, well, other than the ridiculous pain in my head? I'm sharing a bed with some man, but this time isn't like the others. It’s almost as if he actually cares.

Slowly I tried to peel my eyes open. Although it was sort of painful to have the sudden brightness in them, I welcomed it just so I could get some idea of who I'm sleeping with. As I rolled over I felt my heart rate pick up a few notches. This isn't some random dude.

A blush crept onto my cheeks when I realized how close we were. Our bodies were seriously meshed together and my face by his. I’ve dreamed about moments like this, but now that it’s actually happening, I'm more scared than anything else.

When I say we were close, I mean really close. Before I turned around his breath was tingling against my neck, but now I’ve rolled over, his lips are right there. His face is only centimeters away from me but I know better than to do anything about it. You know, when he’s asleep he has a really cute side to him that I rarely get to see. He just looks so at peace and... I really shouldn’t be thinking these things. Matt’s my best friend!

I jumped as I saw his eyes twitch a little. Crap. He cannot wake up with us like this. Matt will freak! What do I do? His grip was too tight on me to pull away; it was as if I was some giant teddy bear for him. Instead of forcing him away from me, which I’d most likely fail at doing plus wake him up in the process of trying, I just pretended to be asleep. Maybe that way it won’t be as weird. If I'm asleep then he’ll think I don’t know this is happening and then he can’t ask me about it because he’ll think I don’t know. Yeah, that’s going to work. I hope.

I felt Matt jump then. Looks like he’s awake then. His breathing had got noticeably faster and I started to worry about what he was going to do. Although at a time like this I shouldn’t be thinking about him this way, I can’t help it. His body just feels so good against me. He’s just so warm and soft and...maybe even gentle.

Before I could get too carried away with my thoughts I felt his arms start to loosen from around me and he slowly removed all the body contact we had. Inside I was screaming to tell him to just stay where he was and let me enjoy some of his Mattness, but no, he didn't listen to that.

I half expected him to get out of bed and just leave me when he pulled away, but he didn't do that. He stayed at the other side of the bed. He wasn't moving much or making much noise, but I knew he was still there. If he’d gotten up I know I would’ve felt the bed shift from his weight. I really liked that he was still there. So what if he wasn't touching me anymore, he was still there for company.

My eyes squinted open again and I took in his appearance some more. He was staring up at the ceiling but he looked like he was concentrating really hard on something. His arms were resting at the back of his head and I couldn’t help noticing how that lifted some of the fabric from his shirt to show some of his stomach.

I admit, I stared for a little while longer than I should’ve but I couldn’t contain myself at the moment. It was hard, okay?

“M-morning,” I stuttered in a really groggy voice. He was about to turn over again so I had to say something to try and stop him working out how long I must’ve been staring at him.

“Hey,” he smiled awkwardly.

Something about him seemed different. I couldn’t quite pinpoint what but I knew something had changed.

I watched him as he stared off into space some more. He was thinking again. I was almost tempted to tell him not to do it if he was straining too much, but I thought it would be best to just let him be.

“What you thinking?” I asked suddenly.

He was obviously thinking something and I'm nosy.

He looked over at me again and then shuffled down further into the bed so he had his head resting on the pillow again now.

“The blanket wasn't here before,” he mumbled, picking up the thick piece of fabric that was on top of the duvet.

Maybe that’s why it was so hot in here.

“I didn’t notice it,” I shrugged, flinching slightly when I felt my head stinging again.

“I should wind you up about how drunk you got last night,” he smiled lightly. “I won’t though.”

“Why not?” I asked him quietly.

He shrugged his shoulders at me.

“I don’t know,” he admitted in a whisper.

Well... this is weird. The few times in the past that I’ve gotten really drunk, Matt’s either had a go at me, or done what he said he should be doing now and started winding me up over it.

“What...What, um, happened last night anyway?” I asked him, noticing that he didn't look anywhere near as hungover as I was. He probably didn't drink as much so maybe he’ll remember something.

“There was a party...kinda. At Nate’s,” he told me in a strangely monotone sounding voice.

“Did I do anything stupid?” I asked really quietly, looking away from him in case I really had done something bad.

“Don't worry about it,” he told me softly as he patted my nose lightly with his finger. When he did that I just stared at him. “S-sorry,” he whispered.

“Erm...what did I do?”

I was giving him really curious eyes. I had to know what was going on and I’d rather hear it from him than stupid gossip going around the school.

“You just... you got a little emotional,” he sighed. “And Nate and them might’ve got you drunk.”

I felt like I’d just been slapped in the face. Why did I do that? Screw the thing with Nate, I couldn’t care less about him.

“What do you mean, emotional?” I asked him worriedly.

“Just...leave it, yeah?” he shrugged as he sat up and went to climb out of bed.

“No,” I hissed. “Please. I just wanna know what I did.”

Matt looked over at me with a sympathetic face.

“Nate made you do some stupid dare when I told you to leave. You got upset and then we fell out and...stuff happened, okay?”

We fell out? Is that why he’s being so off with me? What did I say to him?

“Whatever I said I probably didn't mean it,” I told him sincerely. “You know what I'm like when I drink.”

“You weren’t drunk when you said it,” he mumbled. “But I forgave you for that a while ago,” he smiled. “You just don’t remember.”

“Good,” I smiled. “Do I want to know what my dare was?”

He shook his head at me with a smirk. This time, I think I was happy to not know about it though.

After a while of just lounging around in Matt’s room we went downstairs to get some breakfast. The whole family were down there, as usual. His family always seems so close and in a way I'm jealous of that. I know Caron isn't his real mum and Caitlin isn't a blood sister either, but they still act like they’re related. It’s just really...nice.

Matt didn't like them being around at the start. He didn't talk about it much, but I remember when his mum died he wanted it to just be him, his dad and older sister. Then his sister moved out though and Caron and Caitlin moved in. I think he found it really hard to get over his mum. I suppose I sort of wished he felt he could trust me enough to talk about it, he never did though. Matt’s the sort of person to keep things all bottled up inside.

“Morning boys,” Caron smiled.

She’s definitely a morning person. I looked round to the clock and realized it wasn't actually that early though. It was half eleven. Okay... maybe I'm just really lazy.

Joe, or Mr. Philips as I call him at school was sat with his newspaper at the kitchen table. Caitlin was watching the TV, apparently that’s what she does the majority of the time, and Caron had just finished her own breakfast when we came down.

“We didn't know you two were coming back last night,” Matt’s dad told us before taking a sip of his hot drink.

“We didn't,” Matt said back to him harshly as he started raided the cupboards for cereal. “We came back this morning.”

Usually him and his dad seem to get on better than this. Did something happen between them two?

I was just standing at the side of the table, not doing much at all. It wasn't that it’s new for me to be here because I’ve been round Matt’ thousands of times. I just don’t like being around parents sometimes.

“So how come your back here then?” he asked, putting his newspaper down.

“Nate was being an ass,” he mumbled.

“He’s a good kid,” his dad said sternly.

“Doesn't mean he can’t be an ass,” Matt retorted.

Joe, Mr. Philips, Matt’s dad (whatever I'm meant to call him) gave him a ‘fair enough’ sort of look before inviting me to sit down at the table with him. I did so reluctantly.

“Is Krave alright for you?” Matt asked me, holding up the box of cereal in his hand.

“Er yeah,” I smiled. If I’m honest I have no idea what that is, but if Matt likes it it must be good.

“I'm sure I said you can’t eat that,” Joe suddenly barked up again.

“One bowl of sugary chocolate cereal won’t suddenly make me out of shape dad,” Matt hissed back. He was being really snappy with his dad today. Maybe he was just tired. “And why’d you buy it if I can’t eat any?”

“It’s for Caitlin actually,” he said, getting the attention of the younger girl who was sat in the room next to us watching TV.

“Matt can’t have my cereal!” she shouted, walking into the room with a stroppy look on her face.

Matt just rolled his eyes and poured us both a bowl anyway.

“Mum!” she shouted. “Matt’s taking it when I said he couldn’t!”

Oh God.

Just then she decided to come and sit next to me and continue with the complaining.

“Erm. Just this once honey,” Caron smiled unsurely. I don’t think she knew whose side to take. “Just while Riley’s here.”

“Riley’s always here,” she moaned. Well, now I feel welcome. “And...And I didn't say he couldn’t have any; just Matt can’t.”

“Grow up,” he hissed at her, pushing her out of the way so he could sit in the seat next to me.

“Mum! Matt stole my seat!”

Matt rested his head on his arm which he had leant against the table. He was obviously not in the mood for this.

“Matt, that was mean,” their mum sighed.

“He’s my mate and I'm sitting with him,” he shrugged, “deal with it.”

“I think you’ll have to stop having friends over until you learn to talk to us properly,” his dad finally intervened.

Matt didn't say anything; he just let out a few negative mumbles that most likely involved the odd curse. As soon as I was finished eating I felt like it was time for me to go. They clearly wanted to get on with the punishing and I'm not sure if I want to be in the way.

“Erm... I’d best head home,” I told them awkwardly.

Matt stood up and walked with me to the door. Luckily no one else decided to follow.

“Sorry about that,” he told me shamefully as he stared holes into the ground. “They’re just really annoying me at the minute.”

“I can tell,” I whispered.

When he looked up I noticed how he was staring right at my lips. It made me slightly uncomfortable but I did my best to not let it show.

“I’ll see you Monday,” I smiled as I pulled open the door.

It was weird but when I said that Matt quickly pulled me into a hug. He was holding me really tightly but I could tell he needed it right now. I hugged him back for a little while before we let go of each other.

“I’ll...er, see you at school,” he mumbled, looking embarrassed. “And thanks.”

“Thanks,” I told him as well, “for, well, getting me out of that party. I'm guessing you saved me back there.”

He blushed a little but nodded modestly before we said one last goodbye and I made my way back home.