The Little Things Give You Away

Walking down to my street is always something that I hate doing. There’s just too many odd looking people around, trying to act like they’re not up to something when they clearly are. Some people don’t even pretend to be good guys go. I’ve actually seen people walking around with their knives on show. I guess that’s one way to be intimidating.

When I got to my house I stood outside for a few seconds, double checking that this was actually the right place. They all look so similar and there’s a car on the drive that I’ve never seen before. Mum wouldn’t have randomly bought a new one, unless she’s worse at money management than I thought.

I eventually worked out that it had to be my house but I still didn't want to go in there. Last time when I let that man in so he could bring my mum back, things got nasty. I know how much worse it could’ve been but I'm still worried about it.

“Riley,” I heard my mum calling me from behind.

Wait. What? I could tell there was someone in the house but if mum was out here then...who?

“M-mum,” I stuttered. “Why aren’t you inside?” I asked her quickly. She should be inside.

“The surprise is inside,” she smiled. “I told you last night,” she pressed but it still didn't ring any bells. God how much did I have to drink? I'm suffering serious memory loss here.

On the brighter side, mum was sober. Or, as sober as can be expected I suppose. She wasn't slurring and she was stood up straight which is a definite improvement from the last time I saw her.

I cautiously followed her into the house. As soon as we walked into the living room she shouted,

“Surprise!”

Both me and ‘my surprise’ looked at each other slightly alarmed by my mother’s sudden shouting. It wasn't until I realized who my so called surprised was that I really started to get worked up.

“Why is he here?” I shouted. I seriously did not expect that.

It was the guy who brought her home yesterday; the one who stuffed like £40 into my pants. He was not staying here. Hell no.

“He’s moving in,” she smiled. “It’ll help with the bills and he’s good with kids.”

“I'm not a kid,” I snapped. I'm not. Fifteen is not kid aged, especially with the way I’ve been forced to grow up so quickly. What she’d said first just sunk in and I wanted to scream. No. This isn't happening. “He’s not being anywhere near me.”

“Honey, a word please,” she said before playfully smiling at the creep who was sat on the couch and walking just out of them room so we could talk in private. It wasn't private though. The door was still open and I could see his feet sprawled across the couch. He’s right there! We might as well still be in that room!

Why’s he making himself at home already anyway? I do have a say in who lives in my house. I mean it’s mainly my body that’s paying for this dump.

“He’s not staying,” I told her firmly. “When you were passed out he...he,” I had no idea what to call it so I just spat out, “he came onto me, okay?”

“So...” she shrugged. “He has money, he seems nice and why the hell not?”

“Because, like I just said, he like sexually abused me or something.”

My mum rolled my eyes at her persistent I was being with this. I couldn’t tell if it was because she didn't believe me or she just didn't care. Maybe this isn't a big deal to her. She knows what it’s like to get unwanted attention from guys, so there’s a chance she’s gotten used to it... I sure as hell haven’t though.

“Calm down, sweetie,” she said lightly. “He’ll be stopping in my room so you have nothing to worry about. I’ll keep him busy and you two don’t have to act like friends or anything if you don’t want to.”

“I don’t plan on it,” I told her bluntly.

There was something about how much he scared me that actually made me feel more confident. It didn't make sense how that worked but I assumed it was somehow in my favor at this stage.

“Just, smile for now,” she told me. “Then mop around after.”

As she said that she pushed me back into the room with whatever his name is. To be honest I’d rather not even know he’s name. Giving a creep a name almost makes them seem human. How’s it fair that they get treated the same way as the rest of us?

“Hi again Riley,” he smiled, looking up at me and bearing his teeth.

That was meant to be some nice smile sort of thing but boy was it creepy. He had too many teeth. I don’t know where the extras ones had come from but they had to be there. His mouth just looked way too full to be normal.

“Asshole,” I mumbled.

“Yeah,” he laughed. “You can call me that if you like. I prefer Jackass though. Or just Jack if you think we can be civil.”

We can’t be civil. That’s certain.

“Boys!” mum called, sounded distressed. “Will you two do the shopping for me? Now?” she asked.

Will you two? Ha, no chance if he’s going.

“Sure thing,” Jackass said instantly. Suck up.

“If he’s going then you don’t need me to,” I told her but mum didn't seem to agree.

Apparently I knew what sort of food to get but I couldn’t go on my own because I can’t drive. Stupid Jackass having a license. He’d have nothing over me if he just walked places like everyone else.

“Fine,” I grunted, but I wasn't happy about it. I was far from happy about it.

When I took another look at his car I realized that it must’ve been fairly expensive. If this guy can afford a posh car and to stick £40 down some random kids pants then why the hell is he living with us? I bet he could afford his own place if he wanted to, unless he just hates being alone. That’s it; I bet Jackass can’t stand his own company.

“Why are you in my house?” I asked him boldly as soon as we were both sat in his car.

He let out a sigh and then continued to ignore my question. It wasn't anything hard, all he had to do was tell me what his devious plan was so I could stop him, and if I'm lucky cause him some pain along the way.

“You seem different,” he told me as he ignited the engine. “Last time you seemed scared and timid, but now...” he let out a little thought and just let that sentence hang around.

“Last time you broke into my bloody house and wouldn't leave. This time you’re trying to move in. There’s a slight difference,” I told him smugly.

“Still,” he sighed.

There was a pause for a moment but I wanted to be as annoying as possible. I swear I didn't want to give this guy any time to himself. Ha, I could make it so hard for him that he couldn’t even breath without me knowing about it. Maybe having some lodger could be fun after all.

“How old are you?” I asked him quickly.

“Twenty five.”

Not too old then. His parents could’ve kicked him out or something.

“You here for my mum’s pants?”

“No,” he almost laughed.

You don’t laugh at my mum and get away with it. I’ll teach him that, don’t you worry about it.

“You and her together?” He was about to say no so I smoothly added, “because if you’re not, you will be. She’ll make you share a bed and then won’t give you much choice.”

“Sweet,” he muttered, obviously not paying attention because none of what I just told him was sweet.

“You straight?”

“Bi,” he smirked. “And what’s with all the questions?”

“Shoe size?” I asked, doing my best to ignore his responses.

“Nine, now answer my question,” he hissed. I smirked, knowing that I was starting to get at him already. This is going to take no time at all. I’ll give it a week tops and then he’ll be begging to move out.

“Boxers or briefs?” He blushed slightly when I asked him that one. Awesome! “Well?” I pressured him.

“Whatever I feel like,” he said, sounding irritated already. I love being annoying. It’s one of the things that never fails to bring a smile to my face.

“That wasn't an option, but I’ll let it slide this time. You single?”

“Yeah,” he shrugged.

“Virgin?” I asked him, trying to hold back a laugh.

“No,” he chuckled. “And seriously, what are you doing?”

My mind was running blank. Crap, what if I ran out of annoying things to say. Okay... Wait I’ve got one more!

“Zombies or aliens?”

“Zombies,” he smirked. I’d say zombies too. “Now do I get to ask something?”

No Jackass. This is my game.

“Are you a natural redhead?” I asked this time out of genuine curiosity. His hair actually looked kind of cool.

“Yes and no.” I gave him a ‘come on’ kind of look so he elaborated. “I am, but this isn't my natural red,” he explained as he played with his hair a little. “You like questions then?”

Oh you bet I do buddy! I smirked at that and tried to think of other stuff to ask him. When we got inside the supermarket the questions became a lot easier. I’d ask him about everything, I mean everything we walked past.

“What type of beans are better?”

“Would you say that thing’s bright green, or a bit of something else?”

“How many people are in the store right now?”

“Do you like her shirt?” I asked, finally running out of steam as I gestured to the woman in the flowery blouse thing in front of us. I knew she could hear our conversation but that’s what made it more awkward for him. It was brilliant.

“Not really my style,” he mumbled as he looked down at the list.

Hold on a second! If mum gave him a list then I wasn't needed here at all. Oh I get it! I'm not the only one playing a stupid game. She wants to bring me close to him. She can forget about that though. Quite frankly I wouldn't poke Jackass with a massive stick. Actually, I’d take pleasure of whacking him with a stick really. Hmm...ideas.

As we walked down an isle I saw a mop and I was generally temped to find out how fun it’d be to test that theory. I didn't do it in the end though. You know me; I wouldn't want to risk hurting the guy. Or him retaliating and hurting me.

I need to step my game up. It’s been a few minutes since I’ve gotten on his nerves.

As if God had heard my desperate plea we were suddenly found in the alcohol section. You know...If I pushed him accidentally he could probably knock quite a few bottles off the shelves. He’d probably break something too... God I'm a genius!

Jackass must’ve worked out what I was planning somehow because just as I was about to trip and knock him over, he hissed,

“Don’t even think about it.”

I seriously couldn’t hide my smirk then.

“Too late,” I laughed as I gently pushed him and he almost jumped out of his skin.

In the end he didn't break anything, but it was hilarious to see the panic in his face.

“And somehow I'm the asshole?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.

“No arguments there,” I smiled.