Guiding Lights

I hadn’t realized how long it had been since the last time I had walked through the forest. I had to admit that maybe I was a little clumsy to begin with and that the added tree roots and branches made moving harder for me; a blanket of snow on the ground made things pretty much impossible. Nick and I had only been walking for ten minutes and I was already freezing and “whiney.” He didn’t call me annoying, so that was a definite mood lifter. Sometimes I had to scold myself when those old thoughts came back to me out of habit because I knew Nick to be much more gentle now, and more caring and relaxed when it came to me. He was still very much protective and about rules, and he was definitely a hard-headed perfectionist, but he seemed more at ease around me and he wasn’t as afraid to be his adorable self. I could tell myself that I lucked out or that I had received an enormous blessing, but either way I still had Nick.

And this adorable Nick was making me walk through thick snow that covered all the roots that I usually tripped over.

“My feet are freezing,” I mumbled to no one in particular, but somehow still directed it towards Nick. I glanced over at him and bit my lip when he glanced back, his thin eyebrows raised and his lips twisted up to one side a little. I knew that look - the ‘refraining’ look. I almost smiled. “And my hands re freezing, too.”

“They make gloves, you know,” he muttered with a sort of sarcasm that could make me giggle, but I scoffed instead and watched my foggy breath disappear.

“You’re not wearing gloves,” I pointed out.

And he retorted with, “I’m not complaining.”

I gave him my best sour look but knew I failed because the soft smile on his lips only made me melt inside. I threw my arms around myself and began to wobble through the snow at a faster pace, but he easily kept up. I just wanted to get out of this cold and into the village, or maybe just have him carry me. Nick was always warm.

My nose started to run a little so I used my cold hand to wipe at it, but my sniffle got his attention. He looked at me with his observant gaze and took a step closer, never really worrying about getting close to me like he used to. He didn’t even think twice about it now that we were married. I had to stop myself from smiling each time I thought those words.

“Are you really that cold?” His voice was softer and more concerned, and his eyes - the beautiful brown orbs that sometimes reminded me of a cute little puppy dog - held such a compassionate emotion that was almost hypnotizing. Joe had told me once in private that he had never seen Nick look at anything with so much care and want and need as he did with me, and that the love we shared was indescribable. It was a little cheesy for Joe to say, but I believed him more than anything because I had watched Nick change and evolve. I felt what it was like to fall in love, and I was feeling it every single day.

I broke my train of thought when I realized that Nick had asked me a question and that he was now wearing his expectant gaze along with his concerned one, and I blushed a little. He still made me nervous and gave me those butterflies, and even if they seemed more subtle I knew they had grown; I was just used to it… somewhat, at least.

“Yes,” I breathed out, another puff falling from my lips. I had scolded Nick for not wearing proper clothes to be out in the cold, but my mind was being selfish and could only focus on the fact that I needed his warmth… and that maybe I just wanted to cuddle some more with him -- but that wasn’t important.

“Is your glow not working its magic?” I could hear the tease in his velvety voice and I knew he was mocking me, especially with the way he smirked. I rolled my eyes and gave a weak punch to his arm, smiling a little when he grabbed my wrist. He slid his hand up my clothed arm, trailing his warmth even through the fabric. His fingertips traced a slow line across my jacket, but it felt like he was touching my skin, and I focused completely on him as we walked.

I smiled to myself a little when his hand moved back down to my ice-like one, curling his fingers around my own. With his semi-cool palm pressed tightly to mine and our fingers locked together he pulled my closer to his side, pressing his cold nose against my temple. It made me giggle a little and I squeezed my eyes shut tight, feeling his lips slowly spread into a smile when they, too, held a spot against my skin. His actions only furthered my conclusions about him being incredibly adorable, and I often (much to his dismay) told him so.

“I don’t see why you just don’t phase.” It was hard not to stutter when the wind was so icy, but somehow I managed to keep my voice clear. Nick hadn’t phased as much lately and the reason was never clear. He’d go wolf when he was patrolling, but that seemed to be it. Part of me thought that maybe that was him trying to be ‘normal,’ but our normal - together - was much more preferred. Plus, no one really seemed to notice. “I miss my wolfie.”

I peered up at him from my spot against his side and smiled when I saw the way his lips twitched. His serious side was often replaced with a more teasing one and he seemed calmer. We were comfortable with each other in almost every single way and it was almost like a dream for me.

“I didn’t feel like phasing,” he replied softly after a moment. I didn’t question him because I realized that those words meant things were safe and that he didn’t feel the need to be on guard. Maybe his patrols weren’t so troubling after all.

“Well then, you better get me a dog because you’re failing at the job.” I gave a poke to his side and smiled a little wider when he let out a sarcastic laugh and gave me an eye roll.

“I’m not a pet, Lonnie.”

He always needed to make his position clear. We had been through this.

“Sure you are, Nick,” I giggled, watching my breath circulate through the cool air, “and you’re the cutest puppy I ever did see.” I couldn’t stop the smile I was already wearing from widening, especially when I saw that Nick’s already red cheeks brightened from embarrassment rather than the cold. He didn’t pull away from me, though, and instead tightened his grip. I was already feeling a little warmer by his side and now that he had looked down, his curls tickling my forehead, his scent overwhelmed me, too.

“When are you going to get over that?” he breathed out, peeking down at me for a second before turning to look at the path we were headed towards. I could hear a quiver of a laugh in his voice and I clutched onto him a little tighter.

“I don’t know.” I gave him a shrug and turned my head forward, resting my temple on his shoulder. My eyes drooped shut when the wind blew his scent over me fully, causing me to almost get lost in it. Everything about him made me feel drowsy and slow, but only in a way that seemed to be romanticized - there was just something to Nick. But instead of seeing him when my eyes were closed I saw the tiny wolf of my drawing, the details still blurry. Had that been Nick? No, it couldn’t have been. This wolf was much smaller and, although it held similarities to Nick’s wolf form, it didn’t quite resemble him fully.

“What’s on your mind?” I was a little startled by Nick’s sudden whisper, the caution and curiosity in his voice present. I leaned my head back to glance at his smooth features, catching sight of his semi-knowing eyes. He knew I was thinking seriously suddenly, he just didn’t know about what. And - for some odd reason - my gut told me not to tell him about my wolf vision or the drawing; not right now, at least.

“Just… nothing.” There was a slight nervous laugh from me and I almost instantly knew that Nick could see through it, but he chose something different to reply with.

“Are you feeling okay?” The concern in his eyes suddenly seemed a little deeper and before I could answer I felt that same sickening feeling slap right into me. As soon as he asked the feeling came back and I didn’t know what it was.

I didn’t hold my breath or gasp for air, but my even breathing wasn’t so even anymore and I felt my stomach start to churn. I wasn’t exactly light headed, but whatever I was I knew the cold helped a little. I wanted to fall out of his grasp and just lie in the snow until the feeling went away, but I realized that I couldn’t let Nick know how horrible I felt now.

“Yeah…” It came out as a whisper, one that didn’t sound too convincing, so I quickly continued. “I’m fine, I feel okay.” He had stopped us in our tracks and kept his intense gaze locked on me. I felt a fire burning in me even though little flecks of snow came down, collecting in our hair and all over the tree branches. The heat in me didn’t feel intoxicating like the one that came when Nick touched me, but rather a burning that held no sensation other than a slight uncomfortable tinge. And even though I didn’t feel like puking anymore I did feel a little weaker.

“Lonnie-” I could always tell what he was going to say by the look in his eyes and the way he said my name. I cut him off.

“Really, Nick. There’s nothing wrong.”

He gave me a long look, opening his mouth after a few moments of the cold whipping at us, but his attention was suddenly drawn elsewhere. His head snapped to the side and I immediately stepped closer to him. My eyes trailed over to where his were settled, but I saw nothing… nothing but snow and bare trees. He didn’t have his alert look so I knew there wasn’t anything really wrong, but I was still curious. I chose not to ask though because I was afraid he’d bring up the previous topic.

He said nothing and took his time to look back down at me, but I noted that his eyes seemed softer. I gave him a genuine smile and reached of his hand, happy when he grabbed it. We started off through the snow again in a peaceful silence, our slow breathing becoming in sync just like our footsteps. I tried to walk a little faster so he didn’t have to lag with me, but he didn’t seem to mind so much and continued to match whatever pace I led with ease.

I was glad when the familiar surroundings of the village came into sight only a few moments later because my feet were freezing and sore already. I kept my complaints in and looking around instead. It took me a moment to realize that hardly anyone was outside, but seeing as it was snowing pretty hard now, I guess I understood.

Nick’s hand kept me warm and comforted. The profile of his face gave me an indication that he, too, was feeling the same. I didn’t have time to throw a teasing comment at him when he gave me a quick glance because he then looked away, prompting me to do the same. I saw three familiar figures, all of them holding snowflakes in their messy hair. What were they doing outside in the cold?

“Hey!” The loud voice was directed at Nick even though he was already looking at him, and he cracked a smile. “Nick came to visit us!” Russell slapped Ryan’s shoulder, gaining an annoyed look from him, but he smiled at us anyway.

“And he brought his wifey,” Sean smirked. I gave a soft giggle, immediately catching sight of Nick’s cheeks reddening a little more. How cute was he? I bit my lip just as an impulse thought flew through me. Nick’s pack began to trudge over, their eyes never leaving us, and I instantly made my move. I stood on my tippy-toes and pecked my cold lips to Nick’s somewhat warm cheek, feeling it heat up when I gave him a lingering kiss there.

He turned his head when I leaned back and allowed my feet to sink into the blanketed ground, ignoring the embarrassed ‘don’t do that’ gaze he was probably going to give me. I craned my neck forward and somehow managed to kiss his lips, too, earning snickers from the pack. He hesitated for only a moment before he gave me a soft kiss in return, pulling away in a shy manner when one of them - most likely Russell - wolf whistled.

“All hail the great wolf, right?” Sean grinned while his eyes trailed between an embarrassed Nick and a smiling me.

“Get some, Nick!” Russell proceeded to shout, making Ryan wince.

“Dude, shut up,” he said to his brother, and I couldn’t contain my laughter any longer. Nick shook his head and looked down, but he couldn’t hide his widening closed-lip smile, complete with those adorable dimples and creases.

“Leave my wolf boy alone, guys,” I grinned, and the three of them seemed to roar with laughter.

“Hear that, Sean?” Russell grinned, nudging the shorter boy who stood next to him. Ryan rolled his eyes from his other side. “The kid is lovesick.”

“Hey,” Nick spoke suddenly, though his voice didn’t cut off the laughter completely. “This kid-” he mocked, “just so happens to be in charge.” I could see the playfulness in his eyes.

Russell gave a playful sigh and slumped his shoulders. “Don’t you just hate it when the younger ones get the good benefits?” he said jokingly; I could see the admiration in his eyes rather than jealousy. Nick gave a little smirk and gripped my hand a little tighter, causing me to blush a little too.

“Wait…” Sean looked a little confused. “You’re saying that Nick is younger than you two?” He looked between the twins and Nick, his eyebrows rising. I never really bothered to learn if Nick was in fact younger than them, but I guess he was.

“Yep,” Ryan answered this time. “He’s two years younger, only a year older than you.”

Sean looked almost amazed at Nick, a reaction that was pretty common when learning of or even looking at him. He still amazed me.

“But I’m not a kid.” He was a little more serious this time, no doubt trying to protect the little ego he sometimes had. It was more of a pride thing though, I felt. I allowed my eyes to trail over all of his features, not even able to register how beautiful he was when his eyes caught mine.

“No comment, Lonnie?” Russell teased, forcing me to tear my gaze away from Nick.

“I don’t want to embarrass him even more, but he’s definitely a man.”

My eyes widened a little when Ryan gave another whistle, the three of them beginning to crack up. I could only imagine how red Nick’s cheeks were now.

“I didn’t mean it that way, pervs.” I couldn’t even stop myself from laughing.

“Okay guys, don’t you think we’ve made fun of Nick enough today?” I could tell Nick was a little thankful for Ryan speaking up, even if he was still laughing a little.

“Yeah, yeah,” Russell sighed. I noticed that his face suddenly turned a little more serious and then he took a step forward, leaving Ryan and Sean to stand behind him. “It’s actually good that you came…” he started off with an almost nervous look. He cleared his throat. “You see, we sort of…” He trailed off and glanced behind him, making me nervous. Nick seemed to stay calm, but he had that hard expression on now, his eyes forcing Russell to continue. “We heard that there’s someone new in the village.”
That was a big deal?

“Does the council know?” Was this a big deal? The urgency in Nick’s voice made me think it was now.

“Nope,” Sean popped, “and no one even knows who it is.”

“Do you even have any idea of who it could be?” I glanced at Nick as he said this, immediately wondering if this “new person” could be Coimbra. Was he back? Or worse… maybe it was Jeremy. I could feel my heart tighten in my chest at just the thought and I reflexively gripped Nick’s hand a little tighter. He tore his gaze away from the guys and looked down at me with softer eyes, reassuring me and comforting me with such a small gesture. I bit my lip.

“It’s definitely someone new,” Ryan reassured and his eyes burned into me for an extra moment, giving me a moment to relax. “We didn’t recognize the smell.”

Nick gave a nod and I gave a sigh, but no one seemed to be at ease just yet. There was a new person lurking around that no one knew of. What if he was dangerous? I had to think about the positive side, about this guy being harmless, but it worried me that Nick could be out chasing him at night.

“Is that what you were patrolling?” The question fell from my lips with reluctance and a bit of fear, but part of me hoped they answered yes because then I wouldn’t have to worry about Coimbra or Jeremy being out there.

“Most likely,” Nick responded. There was no hesitance.

“So… what does that mean then?” I hated how everyone seemed to know more than me.

“It doesn’t mean anything.” Nick turned towards me and grabbed my other hand, his eyes widening a little to show me that he knew what he was talking about. I trusted him, but I didn’t know what he meant. “Whoever this is can’t be much of a threat. We’ll keep patrolling when it’s needed, but in the meantime we should find out a little more about this.”

“Another council visit?” I grinned, remembering our last secret visit.

Nick gave me a slight crooked smirk, a bit of playfulness sparkling in his otherwise serious eyes. “Maybe…”

“Are we missing something?” Sean blurted, but neither of us turned to look at him.

“You missed a lot of stuff, dude…” Russell chuckled. I could hear him begin to speak again but chose to block him out, listening to Nick instead when he announced our departure. He told them we’d be at his parents’ house if they needed him and they said their goodbyes, telling us they’d see us later.

He shifted us to the direction of the familiar house and I was more than glad that we’d be out of the snow in a matter of minutes. I had managed to glance down at Nick’s watch and catch sight of the numbers that told me it was already a little past noon. We’d stay the night tonight and most likely leave sometime tomorrow morning, but we had no plans after that. I knew that Nick would probably want to find out more about this mysterious person and so did I, but that meant I’d have to slow down on my schoolwork and I didn’t really favor that idea.

There were so many things going on. Nick had his Great Wolf duties and although I didn’t have many witch duties (thankfully) I still had tons of teenage ones. I had never really wanted to grow up so fast, but getting done with school and moving in with Nick seemed to be my first priority now. It was kind of amazing to think about me being more of a woman now rather than a girl. My seventeenth birthday was in a matter of months! Things were looking up for once and I hoped it stayed that way.

“I didn’t know you thought so much,” Nick teased in a quiet voice, glancing down at me as we came closer and closer to our destination. I rolled my eyes but ended up smiling a little anyway.

“You’re so funny, Nick.”

He laughed lightly at my sarcasm and looked down toward his moving feet, slowing down his pace before I could even look away from him. We glanced up toward the front door at the same time and immediately spotted Joe. The way he knew exactly when to come out amazed me.

“Hey! Look who’s here.”

“Joe-” Nick didn’t even have time to say anything else before Joe flung his arms around him, practically picking his little brother up. Nick groaned and left his arms by his sides, his legs lifting up behind him out of reflex. I could only imagine his expression. He was probably horrified that he was having to show a form of affection; he was barely tolerant with me. I laughed.

“And it’s my sister-in-law!” He practically dropped Nick when he finally acknowledged me, getting me to squeal a little when he pulled me into a tight hug, refraining from lifting me off the ground like he did with Nick. I was waiting for Nick to tell Joe to let me go or something of the sort, but he didn’t and it made me smile a little more. Maybe he wasn’t as jealous as I thought. “You smell good,” Joe chuckled, still holding me tight.

Nick cleared his throat a little, making a little nervous ‘ha’ sound before speaking and gripping my arm gently. “Yeah, Joe, that’s enough…”

And the jealousy only made him cuter.

Joe gave a smirk and leaned up against the doorframe while Nick slowly pulled me closer to him. “What brings you two back home?”

“I have to talk to Dad.” Nick used the hand that wasn’t reconnected with mine to rub the back of his neck and I noticed that his eyes looked a little more shielded. In a way it felt like an honor to be one of the only ones Nick would open up completely to, but on the flipside I knew that his actions often pushed others away - especially his family, like Joe.

“What about?” Joe had a natural curiosity, I had found, whereas Nick was more secretive. I held my tongue and waited for Nick to respond, watching the two carefully.

“Things,” he said simply, and Joe gave him a look as if to say ‘what things?’

“Like… the Great Wolf things? Or-”

“Does it matter?” Nick cut off. Joe seemed to shrink back a little and I could easily see Nick’s eyes grow a little softer. “I just need to talk to him about me and Lonnie.”

“So it’s a marriage thing?” He looked between the two of us, silently analyzing us. He could tell there weren’t any problems between us, but he still wanted to know. Nick didn’t have a lot of patience. “Or is it something that your older brother wouldn’t understand?”

Joe wasn’t bitter in any way, but he had told me once before that he was going to try harder to get Nick to open up to him, too. It hadn’t worked too much.

“He’s in the kitchen with mom,” he finally said with a sigh, getting Nick to give him a thankful half smile. He took a step back into the house, holding the door open for us. Nick gave my cheek a gentle peck and I smiled at him before he made his way into the house and disappeared into the kitchen. Joe motioned me inside and I didn’t waste any time getting out of the cold. But I did hesitate on saying what I wanted while Joe shut the door behind me.

“You know, umm… Nick doesn’t like telling people things.” I turned around to face him while shrugging out of my coat. “I even have a hard time getting him to tell me things.”

“He’s my brother,” he said in a tone that was a little snippy, “I know that.” I looked down at my hands, curling my fingers around the slightly damp fabric of the coat. I heard Joe let out a sigh and I looked up, watching him bite his lip for a moment before speaking again, much softer this time. “I mean… I should know that.”

He shook his head slowly and took a step closer to me, choosing to lean against the wall I was closest to. I felt a little bad for him. Kevin had recently moved out of the village to live with his girlfriend Danielle because they were getting married soon. Nick had been away from Joe for a long time before and he felt alone, living with his parents and his youngest brother. He felt like he had nothing going for him, but I knew that wasn’t true.

“He’ll come around… he did for me.” I gave him a genuine smile and he gave me a light chuckle I return, his eyes growing a little lighter.

“That’s because he loooooves you,” he drug out, proceeding to make kissy-faces and noises. I blushed. It didn’t take him long to become a little more serious, though, and he began to speak again. “Hey - you feeling okay?”

I immediately gave him a look of confusion but remembered that Nick had asked me that moments ago. Did I not look okay?

“I’m fine.” I pushed my hair back and licked my lips, turning away from his unusually observant gaze. “Does it look like I’m not?”

He shrugged and pushed himself off the wall, tilting his head a little while he looked at me. “I don’t know…” That helps a lot, Joe. “Is something bothering you?”

I opened my mouth to say no because my first reaction said that everything was fine, but nothing came out and I found myself wanting to tell someone about my drawing. It wasn’t some big secret, not at all, but it felt strange to keep it in… like it was bigger than I was making it out to be. I had to tell him.

“I don’t… I don’t know where this thing I’m drawing came from,” I said in a voice that was practically a whisper. I was both curious and stumped about my drawing. This caught his attention. “It’s a wolf, but it’s like a baby wolf. I know it isn’t Nick - I mean, he looks similar, but there are differences in my head. And I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately, which I don’t know how I have time since school is so stressful and-”

“Lonnie,” Joe interrupted, a twitch of a smile on his lips. My eyes searched his face while I held my breath. “Just breathe.” Good suggestion.

I let out a slow gasp of breath and let my shoulders slump, hugging my coat to me because it somehow smelled like Nick.

“Have you told Nick?”

“About the drawings?” I asked. He nodded. “Not really… I don’t know. It didn’t feel like I should tell him.” He gave me a thoughtful look and stepped back yet again, stretching himself out before leaning back against the wall.

“Does he know you’re stressed? ‘Cause it’s kind of obvious.”

“Yeah, but he thinks there’s more to it,” I murmured.

“And is there?”

I had to take a moment to think about that, not quite sure if there. I wanted to get school done and I was stressing myself out with the pace I was going, that much was true. But was there an overall stress that caused me to feel so sick? No one knew about that part and I didn’t plan on letting anyone - especially Nick - know that it actually bothered me. And the mysterious drawing… was it connected somehow? Or maybe I was just freaking myself out. I needed to focus.

“No. There’s nothing more to me being stressed.” I hoped that wasn’t a lie.

“So why don’t you tell him about this baby wolf then?” he inquired.

I didn’t know.

I was ready to say something, though I wasn’t quite sure what, but my attention was drawn to the figure that entered the room, making my glow spark. Nick slowly moved to stand beside me, the softness that seemed to surround him making me feel a little better.

“Is this going to be a husband and wife only conversation?” Joe teased lightly, his eyes only lingering on me for a moment before he allowed a soft smile to overcome his features. To my surprise, Nick smiled back.

“I was just letting him know that we’re, umm, going to move in together.” He seemed so much shyer now that he was talking about us.

My lips stretched into a wide smile and I think I let off a little squeal, but I wasn’t sure because Nick’s little laugh distracted me.

“We are? Like… for sure?”

“For sure,” he nodded.

I think he predicted that I would throw my arms around him because he had already opened his in a waiting manner, making me smile even wider - if it were possible. I squeezed him as tight as I could and inhaled his scent, nuzzling my face against his neck. It caused him some Goosebumps but he hugged me in return and kissed my head, mumbling something that was probably directed towards Joe.

[ G L ]

I had to practically force Nick to spend some time with his family because he didn’t like leaving my side, but I really didn’t mind. I spent most of my time just thinking in his old room. I had a lot of things to think about, but I chose to focus on other things instead. I told myself that I would give Anna a call one of these days. I made it a top priority to get Nick to take me on a date; the hook for him would be that he’d get to drive his mustang somewhere. And I was definitely thinking about who could be lurking around the village.

It had been a few hours before Nick had come in to settle down, both of us tired from the long day. He didn’t stay for long because he was embarrassed to change in front of me, but when he finally came back after that I practically forced him to lie down with me. He had crawled over to me at an agonizingly slow pace, amusement in his eyes when he saw that I was actually bouncing a little. So when he finally plopped himself down and laid back a little I dove into him and wrapped my arms around his torso the best I could. He sighed.

“And I thought we weren’t cuddling tonight.” I could tell he was being sarcastic.

“Ha!” I practically snorted, nuzzling my face against his chest while it vibrated with silent laughter. “Haven’t you learned by now? You’re my teddy bear… or teddy wolf, whatever you prefer.”

“You know what’s stumped me?” he mumbled against my hair, but he didn’t wait for my answer because he knew I’d want to know. “How a witch could like a dog so much. Aren’t you supposed to like cats?”

“Isn’t that a stereotype?” I pulled my face up a little to look at him and scrunched up my nose. “I don’t like cats.”

“You’re not a normal witch, are you?” The tiny smile on his lips was enough to melt me. I think it did a little, actually.

“You had to know I wasn’t normal the day we met.” His smile widened a little bit.

“Really?” He furrowed his thin eyebrows and cocked my head, leaning back a little to get a good look at me. “You mean I’m married to some weirdo?” My heart skipped a bit when he mentioned us being married and it took me a moment to actually realize what he said. My mouth fell open slightly, still holding a smile, and I pulled one of my arms that was locked around him forward so I could use my hand to slap his chest.

“Jerk!” I squeaked, but the way he looked at me made me giggle and blush pathetically. I blew a strand of hair out of my face and cocked my head to the side just as he had done. “But… yeah. You’re married to a weirdo. Wish you weren’t?” I joked. I expected him to laugh or roll his eyes, but he did neither. His face turned serious instead, making my glow spark when his velvety eyes held a dull sparkle.

“No,” he murmured, and he shook his head a little. “I don’t wish that.”

Sometimes I hated how Nick could turn a light and teasing situation into a serious one, but at the same time I loved it because it was only him that could do it and be so beautifully intense. This was one of those ‘love it’ moments.

“You don’t?” I couldn’t find my voice now that I was staring directly into his eyes with the room only lit with my glow. “You wouldn’t change anything about me?”

He gave a breathy laugh, his lips curling up into a little crooked smile. “There are so many things about you that get on my nerves sometimes. It bothers me that you can be so carefree and that you always find a way to laugh, and it bothers me that you make me want to open up to you. There are things about you that I thought I wouldn’t be able to stand, but they only make me love you more than I already do. You look at me with these… these eyes. I’ve told you a thousand times how they sparkle when you smile, but you’re so beautiful to me. There are so many things that irritate me, but I thrive on them.”

It was rare for Nick to ramble in any sort of way, but when he did it was a sure way to get those butterflies to go crazy. The way he stared at me when he spoke - so clear and emotional - made me want to pause our moments and never let them go. I was almost positive that he could tell I was amazed by him and his words, and he gave me a shy smile.

“And to answer your question - no, I wouldn’t change anything about you. I love you just the way you are, Lilliani Stewart.” I could feel my cheeks ignite and I felt like I could just flop over. A wide closed-lip smile took over my face and I instantly drew closer, ready to attach my lips to his, but he drew back with knitted eyebrows. “Jonas,” he said suddenly, almost like he was correcting himself. It took me a second to realize what he meant. “I meant Jonas. Lilliani Jonas.”

His own cheeks turned a bright pink and I honestly didn’t know how much sweeter he could get.

“Come here,” I giggled, and I instantly pressed my lips to his. He kissed me back with a gentleness and a passion that I would never get used to, making my heartbeat speed up a little. His hands found a spot on my hips slowly and my fingers wound themselves around his curls, pulling him closer. Somehow my smile didn’t disrupt the kiss which I was thankful for considering I wasn’t going to stop either anytime soon.

We had changed so much and just being together made all the difference in the world. We were growing up, things were finally looking right, and I was excited for the future. And when Nick held me to him, my head tucked underneath his chin, making me feel safe, I hoped for everything to work out.