Why Is This So Unbearable

I'm thinking of doing it again. I'm thinking of self inflicting that unforgettable pain that I deserve! Who would care if I died anyway? No-one would. I mean, they never come down here to see how I'm doing! They never bring me any sort of love! They just don't seem to care anymore.

Pfft, what am I talking about, with the anymore shit? They never cared before this happened anyways! So I'm just going to do it. I'm going into the sleep I love. And the upside is I don’t even need to look for a blade because I have all the blades I need right here!

So, rip your arms and rip them dead.
Then come crashing down onto your head!

I wake up to see that I am still alone because I am...
I'm a depressed fucker. That’s what I am, but it is what I deserve! I deserve to die alone. I deserve to go down with blood stains on my body! I deserve all I get! And everyone knows it!

All I want to do is scream, but I wouldn’t want to wake the perfect family up! That is just above my head! They are perfect though. They are. They are. They are! I bet none of them fall asleep crying like and do! I bet none of them ever slash themselves and think its glorious! And I bet if this was them they wouldn't be crying. Which is how I am right now!

I wish I wasn't alone!

I need someone to comfort me. To wipe these tears from my face!

Oh, I just want him!