Welcome to Hell

It seemed as though at some point that everyone would come back to start work on “De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas” but no one ever did. Kirsten, Alva, and Gry would call to check in and Hellhammer and Necrobutcher would update them but that was all. No one came to see them or find out how they were coping.

Pelle’s dad came by in March of 1991 and they had a small conversation about Dead moving back to Sweden while still being in Mayhem. It seemed to Benedikte that Pelle was not listening and he wore a blank stare. He was disinterested in what his father had to say.

Benedikte felt Pelle slipping further and further away. They had the same chemistry but Pelle’s mind always seemed to be off in the clouds. She was hoping it would pass.

“Pelle I miss everyone. Why haven’t they come to see how we’re doing?” Benedikte asked him one day.

“Well I think they feel the house is toxic and just coming back would sour their good mood.” Pelle deadpanned.

Benedikte moved back to sit down with Pelle who was writing.

“Hey what are you writing there? It’s a new song isn’t it?” Benedikte said.

“Yeah I’m actually done, would you like to read it.”

She nodded and he continued, “It’s called ‘Life Eternal’ I think it’s my best one yet.” He announced happily.

A dream of another existence
You wish to die
A dream of another world
You pray for death

To release the soul one must die
To find peace inside you must get eternal

I am a mortal, but am I human
How beautiful life is now when my time has come
A human destiny, but nothing human inside
What will be left of me when I’m dead
There was nothing when I lived

What you found was eternal death
No one will ever miss you

“Wow Pelle, I can’t believe this. It’s amazing and sums up all the things you have ever told me.” Benedikte said.

“Hey B, would you like to spend some time with your family and Kirsten?” Pelle asked her.

“Yeah but I don’t want to leave you here by yourself. I’m afraid you’ll get lonely.”

“It will be tough but I’ll be quite alright.” Pelle said.

“Really you’re not gonna be mad? I just don’t feel right leaving you lonesome.” Benedikte said concerned.

Pelle grabbed Benedikte softly but firmly, “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine, I want you to go and have a good time. See your family, see how they’re doing.” He said searching her face.

“Okay, I guess if you’re fine, it can’t be too bad. Thanks Pelle, I enjoy spending time with you but I do miss my family.” She reasoned.

She walked up the stairs to grab her things. She figured everything would be fine until they could come back and regroup.

She came back down with her bag. Dead greeted her at the bottom of the stairs once he heard her coming down.

He had his Sarcofago album “INRI” held tightly to his chest.

“Pelle why do you have your album with you, it was one of the few you brought when you came.” She said at the bottom of the stairway.

“Well since you were so worried I was gonna give you something to remind you of me while you’re gone. I also added some new drawings.” He added happily.

So that night Pelle walked Benedikte to the train station and bid her farewell. Benedikte saw Pelle shedding a tear as the door closed, mirroring the tears falling down her cheeks.

Since they had been inseparable since day one it felt like a part of her was lost when Pelle was not by her side. She figured this was good for them.



Pelle

I watched the door close and I turned to go home. I bumped into someone, I was going to yell and noticed it was Hellhammer.

“Hey Pelle, what are you doing here?” Jan asked.

“Oh I was dropping Benedikte off. She’s gonna go visit her family for awhile.” Pelle answered.

“Good she really missed them. Anything new with you,” Jan asked.

“Yeah I finally got a new knife. It’s really sharp and a hassle to find.” Pelle said.

They finally parted ways after talking for a while. Pelle made his way home. It was always good to talk to Jan.

‘It is a silent journey to make it to home sweet home.’ Pelle thought sardonically.

Benedikte got home and went straight to Kirsten’s house. They were more of a family to her.

She knocked on the door. When the door swung open Kirsten was in the doorway.

“Oh B, you made it.” She said throwing her arms around her best friend.

“Kirsten I’m so happy to see you.” Benedikte said sobbing.

“What’s wrong,” Kirsten said concerned. “You don’t seem happy.” She said leading Benedikte inside.

“I am, I just felt so bad leaving Pelle alone. He said it was okay, but I’m concerned.”

“Okay Benedikte, Sunday evening we’ll take the train back home. We can surprise him Monday morning.”

“That sounds great, now where is everyone.” She said smiling.

There was a chill in the air that Sunday evening. Little did they know it was an omen of things to come.

The train ride home was unnerving. They were cramped inside and Benedikte’s stomach was tied into knots. She hoped they would get home soon. When the train stopped at the station Benedikte’s scar started burning.

Kirsten saw her grimace and asked, “Benedikte what’s wrong?”

“The scar Pelle gave me is burning. It’s never felt this way before. Something is terribly wrong,” she said scared.

Pelle walked around the house thinking. He finally decided he would do it now. It had been far too long. He wrote two quick notes and went to work. He barricaded the door to his room and grabbed his knife.

Benedikte’s scar was hurting intensely now and slowly getting worse. Benedikte racked her brain for what could be so wrong, but she knew it had to do with Pelle.

He took the knife and slit both wrists and his throat. He walked around for a bit with blood streaming down soaking his shirt. These cuts were not enough because he still wasn’t dead yet. He then grabbed Euronymous’ shotgun.

The pain became so unbearable she couldn’t take it. She fainted and collapsed to the ground. Kirsten sat her up in her lap, ‘Please be okay’ she pleaded in her head.

He sat down on his bed and pointed the shotgun to his temple. He pulled the trigger and his body fell limp. He slumped to the floor while his lifeblood spilled from his body.

Benedikte’s eyes fluttered open.

“Oh thank goodness your okay.” Kirsten said tears spilling from her eyes.

“I feel sick Kirsten we need to get home. Something’s happened to Pelle.” She said with fear in her eyes.