The Joke's on Me

Mushy Ben and John.

He gave me that stupid look again. That stupid, “Woe is Ian. I’m so sorry,” look.

Stupid bastard.

“If I could explain everything, I would. But I can’t right now. I really can’t,” is the best he can he can give me? He couldn’t explain himself? He didn’t even have the decency to call it all off either.

And I really thought that I would actually mean something to him. That I was special. Well guess again, Sean-fucking-Smith. Fell for that in a second, didja?

I walk away from him, and stalk to the bus, twisting the knob and hurling the door open. I stalk inside and slam in. I inhale and go into the bathroom and lock the door behind me. I swallow hard and look up at the ceiling, hoping that a waterfall won’t come cascading down my cheeks.

Sean? Are you in there?”

I swallow hard and sniff. “Y-yeah. Is that you Gavin?”

“Yeah, kiddo. It’s me. Can I come in?”

I wipe at my nose with the back of my hand and reach up, unlocking the door. Gavin pushes his way and shuts it behind him. He looks down at me and I look down at the floor. He drops to his knees and grasps my shoulders gently.

“You wanna talk about it?”

I shake my head no.

Gavin frowns. “Come on. Spit it out.”

I shake my head ‘no’ again. Gavin shakes me slightly. “You’re crying. I think I deserve the right to know.”

“… Y-you… promise you won’t tell anyone?”

His eyes soften. “I promise. Now come on. I’ll beat up whoever hurt you.”

I smile slightly.

“W-well… y-you know how I l-like Ian and all, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Well… uhmm… you’ve probably guessed it, but uh, we’ve been… ah… fucking.”

One of Gavin’s eyes shoot way up on his forehead. “I thought so… He hurt you, didn’t he!? I’ll chop him to pieces,” he scowls, struggling to stand up. I panic and grab his arm.

“No, no, you can’t say anything! We made it some… secret. Please don’t say anything. It’ll just give him more of a reason to hate me!”

Gavin scowls. “What did he do!? Tell me.”

“I… that girl…”

“He’s dating her.”

“He told me that we’d hang out the week before tour started, but he never called or anything, and every time I texted him, he’d say he was busy practising or something. And then now he comes on tour with a girl… and then he wouldn’t tell me what’s going on… and… yeah…” I trail off weakly.

Gavin looks super pissed. “What a cunt. I’ll kill ‘im.”

“No! You can’t! Promise me.”

“I can’t… I can’t have him hurting you like this. He can’t get away with it.”

Promise me, Gavin,” I demand, clutching his arm, hard. He winces.

“Ugh. Fine. One more wrong move and I’m cutting his balls off.”

I nod and Gavin reaches over and curls an arm around me, hugging me. I hug him back tightly and he pulls me up. “Come on, people will wonder where we are. We’ll go out, yeah? And avoid… him.”

“M’kay. Sounds like a plan.”

He smiles slightly and I smile weakly back and suddenly, I find myself out and about near the buses. Gavin drags me over to a couple people, I plops me down in one of the plastic chairs. “You remember Fraser and his brother John and Be-… ew. You two are so mushy,” Gavin laughs, pushing Ben slightly.

Ben beams and clings to John. He’s short enough to be sitting on John’s lap. John’s arms are wrapped around Ben from behind, Ben’s head tucked under John’s chin.

“Can’t help it. John’s cuddly,” Ben grins. John chuckles and kisses the top of Ben’s head.

Ian was kind of cuddly too…

“And warm. And it’s kind of cold out here,” He adds, pecking Ben’s cheek too. Ben’s smiling so hard his eyes are slits. His hands clutch John’s much larger hands and brings them up to kiss his knuckles. John nuzzles Ben’s cheek with his stubble, and Ben squeals, batting him away gently.

My stomach churns.

Why can’t that be Ian and I?

I look away in the opposite direction, frowning.

I catch sight of Ian and Alaina. She’s still holding his hand.

What a clingy bitch.

She turns to me, almost as if she senses me looking at her. I shoot the most malicious glare I can in her direction. She looks startled and looks away quickly, clutching onto Ian’s hand harder, looking around nervously.

Go ahead. Keep going to him. Watch, in a week, he’ll get bored of you too and drop you like a piece of steaming cow dung.

I turn back to Ben and John.

Ben’s turned around now so that he’s straddling John’s lap. They’re exchanging Eskimo kisses. It makes me green with envy.

And then I hear, “I love you, Ben.”

“Mmm… I love you too, John.”

I can’t take it anymore. I stand up quickly, accidentally knocking my chair over loudly. Ben and John jump and bump noses and Fraser and Gavin stop talking to stare at me.

“I’m going back to the bunks. I think I’ll take a nap.”

Gavin’s face is etched in worry, but I wave it off and leave.
♠ ♠ ♠
...
Hello. :D

Aren't Ben and John really adorable together?
They're my favourite YG pairing.
No seriously.
They're like, made of each other. Although, I'm sure Fraser would probably murder his brother in real life if he dated Ben because he'd be totally weirded out. But okay.

Isn't Ian a poop?
Don't be so hard on him though.
He's a sweetheart.
Really.
^___^

Ian and Sean make very sexy videos and John and Ben make cute fluffy videos for:
Oh.Watkins!
Kobra Kid!
dyingforyou
pixie dusttt.
IntentToStartAFire
a7x.Sick.Puppie.x
(you seriously think too fucking much. xD)
sk8terchick
r0cketgoboom

because you guys commented. :3

**comment/subscribe <3

xo,
K

PS.
Have you guys seen The Blackout's The Storm music video? It's fantastic. It came out yesterday. :D

#nowplaying: Keep On Moving - The Blackout