The Dating Rules of a Record Label

"Dougie, stop taking pictures!" I laugh as I try covering the lens of Dougie's digital camera. He found it last night under the bed near all his old porn magazines and he couldn't keep away since.

I'm talking about the camera!

Not the magazines. He hasn't touched those ever since we got together. That's what he says. And I trust him.

"Oh c'mon, Kaya! A couple more pictures. My mum makes a brilliant photo album for the memories of family that we want forever." He grins down at me. I stop jumping around and uncover my face.

"Your mother wants pictures of me in the family albums?" I whisper. I use my puppy dog eyes too.

Dougie nods as I feel a little flutter in my heart. His mother likes me! That's the thing I was worried about! To be included in Dougie's life and included in the memories of how people see him is almost exhilarating. Having Sam Poynter include me in her photo album, like one of the family, is better than winning awards and having deep conversations with supposed-to-be-dead rockstars and mind you, having those conversations with rockstars is a big deal.

"Well since you said she wanted pictures," I sigh and shrug. Dougie flashes (no pun intended) a huge smile and I take the opportunity to jump in his arms.

"I'm here for my photo shoot, Mr. Poynter!" I giggle.

"And where will that photo shoot be?" He asks me with a twinkle in his eye.

"Oh you know..." I laugh and look around, "some place extra comfy."

"Well Ms. Sambora, I have the perfect spot," He carries me to the couch and lays me down. Without thinking properly, I grab a fist full of his shirt and bring him on top of me. My lips crashed against his as I felt his hands slide down my thigh.

As Dougie's lips press against my neck, I look to my right and I expect Zukie to be looking at his owner molest me but Zukie wasn't looking at us like he usually does. Actually, he's not even in the tank. The top latch of the tank was open.

"Dougie, stop." I push him off me.

"What did I do wrong?" He frowns, thinking I wasn't enjoying our moment. He gets off me as I sit up.

"Oh no, it's not you. You're doing everything perfectly," I try to force a smile, "but I think Zukie is missing." Dougie looks at the cage and after realizing that it was void of all reptiles, he gets off me and runs to the empty reptile tank.

"Shit," he mutters to himself as he presses his face up to the tank glass window. "I forgot to close the top." He looks at me.

"Where would he be?" I ask and stretch. I watch Dougie think. He looked so worried that his beloved pet went missing. He looked so cute too that I almost laughed.

"Let's check under the sofas first." He gets down on all fours, revealing his satin boxers. I silently laugh behind his back when I should be helping him. I'm such a bad girlfriend.
Thus began our search for Zukie the lizard. Well actually, it was Dougie's search. I just followed him and took pictures. We checked under the sofa and under its cushions. We looked through the book shelf, behind the TV set, the closet, around the window curtains, and then every nook and cranny of the kitchen. By now I sort of regret acknowledging the absence of Zukie. Because erm...I am a girl...who has needs that no one can satisfy except for Dougie. And now I can't get what I want because of Zukie. I know it's selfish but hey, it's not every day when I have the urge to do explicit things to Dougie.

"He's got to be here somewhere in this flat," Dougie mumbles to himself.

I sigh, "Dougie, I'll check the bathroom. I have to pee anyway," I smile and let Dougie talk to himself.

Sometimes I wonder what life would be like if I didn't have Dougie. I'd probably be still stuck in that messy relationship with my ex-boyfriend. Even though Dougie and I have to be quiet about our relationship, life seems easier. I don't know what is so different with Dougie (apart from rules). I thought about asking Dougie himself but I don't want to know how he really feels about us. It will either go terribly wrong or absolutely wonderful. And I'm just content with what we have together right now.

I walk into the bathroom and close the door. The moment I close the door, I feel something jump on me, resting on my stomach. I scream from shock since I was not expecting Zukie to attach himself to my cotton top.

"What happened?" Dougie rushes into the bathroom.

"I found Zukie," I reply, feeling his claws poke into my shirt and clink to my bra. I smile and try to hide the fact that I nearly peed in my pants.

"Zukie," Dougie shakes his head and sighs. I laugh as the lizard climbs around my chest, tickling me. "Here, let me get him off," and Dougie gently grabs Zukie and tries to pull him off but he wouldn't let go. I look down to see his tiny claws stab deeper into my shirt and no matter how hard Dougie pulled, Zukie wouldn't let go!

"Uh...Dougie, I think your lizard like me," I look at him.

Dougie gives up on trying to free me of Zukie's grasp, "Yeah I think so too. Zukie, she's my girlfriend, not yours and I won't share," Dougie begins to pull at Zukie but this time, the lizard sort of jumps and re-clings himself to me.

"Zukie, I really have to pee!" I whine. Zukie looks up at me with his black, beady eyes in silence. He's sort of heavy. He looked bored. Can reptiles feel bored?

"Hang on, Kaya; let me find some of his dead bugs. Maybe he'll jump off you if I dangle a couple flies in front of him." Then Dougie walks off.

"Okay," I call out to him, "I'll be here...with Zukie. Then I look at the toilet. I really have to empty my bladder.

"What the heck. Zukie, I'm peeing whether you like it or not."

And the whole time, Zukie silently stared at me without blinking. It made me very uncomfortable. When I was done, I slowly walked to the sink to wash my hands.
"Dougie did you find his food?" I call from the bathroom.

"Not yet!" He called back.

I sigh and look around with Zukie still attached to me. I felt the tip of his claws against my skin. Dougie's bathroom was a big one. It had a walk in shower with those seats installed in them and pretty, marble counters. I like his big rug too. It was soft- I like rubbing my toes through it. I really like this bathroom! I took a shower in here once and I got to dance and sing to 'Dancing Queen" while I washed my hair. Dougie wanted to see but I said no and locked the door.

I was sitting on the counter, unbuttoning my shirt since I couldn't handle the sharp claws Zukie possessed when Dougie came in.

"What are you doing?" Dougie asked as I slowly slid off my button-down shirt with Zukie still clinging to it.

"His claws were too sharp for my skin so I had no alternative. Plus you took too long," I smile and hand Dougie my top that Zukie loved.

"I couldn't find his food!" Dougie smiles, "I looked everywhere until I realized I just bought some food and it was in my car."

"Now Zukie has his food and my top. Go Zukie!" I laugh.

"I'll try and pry it away from him and bring it back," then he leaves to put Zukie back in his cage.

I sit on the counter in silence. I found my lotion I left here and decided to put some on. It smelled so good! It had a nice, fresh scent.

As I slid some lotion underneath my black, bra strap, I popped it, "Ow!" I laugh at myself. See! This is what happens when I'm left without a shirt.

"That's got to hurt," Dougie chuckles and brings me back my top, Zukie free.

"Thank you," I smile and take my shirt. Just as I'm about to put it on, I feel Dougie's hands on my thighs.

"You played with lotion again didn't you." He looks at me and then the lotion bottle and smiles.

I laugh and nod and bring Dougie closer to me. I kiss him once and begin to unbutton his shirt as he smiles and watches me. He puts his hands on the sides of my face and kisses me and lets me fumble to roll off his shirt.

"In the bathroom?" He asks as his lips trail down the hollow of my throat. I lead his face back to my lips.

"Sure why not?" I notice my breathing becomes quick. I wrapped my legs around his waist as Dougie accidently knocks things off the counter.

And this rest is highly, pleasurable history.

***********************************************************************************

"I feel naked," I murmured as Dougie played with my hair. I felt the soft rug against my bare back.

"That's because you are," He murmured back. I looked at him, shocked by his reply, and saw his eyes closed as he smiled. I rolled my eyes, giggled, and hit his chest lightly. He caught my hand and kissed it as he opened his eyes.

"What time is it?" I ask and stretch. I noticed the cold tile beneath parts of my body and I curled up into a tiny ball next to Dougie. To be honest, I prefer the bed.

"Eight at night." Dougie looks at his mobile phone.

"Perfect. It's three in the afternoon in Los Angeles." I smile and get up and grab a bath towel to wrap myself in. Dougie may like walking around naked but I don't; I prefer only my bra and undies thank you very much.

"Where are you going?" Dougie calls after me. He's still lying on his bathroom rug. It is quite comfortable...

I pick up my clothes and walk to Dougie's room. "I have to develop our pictures we took earlier today and send some to my parents." I begin to get my clothes on when Dougie comes in with a pout on his face. I notice that his boxers were backwards.

"You're boxers are backwards!" I laugh.

"See! That is why I like to walk around naked!"

**********************************************************************************
I felt guilty for ditching Dougie but I wanted these pictures developed. And that's going to take an extra long time because of all those stupid safety precautions. Speaking of that, I also felt guilty because I'm not allowed to send pictures via through the computer. But I wanted to show my parents how happy I am! Maybe that would make them rethink the divorce and get back together?

I step around puddles as I walk up the steps to Nae's apartment. If I had to choose anyone to handle my pictures, it would be her. Besides, everyone else is busy. Yumi is at work. Karlie is with Galen and Natasha is doing boring adult things like shopping for silverware, and Oliver is debating with the record label. They've been fighting a lot lately and I can tell that Tom, Danny, Dougie, and Harry are getting restless with having to perform what the record label wants. And then I heard Oliver and Karlie talking about perhaps maybe McFLY would like to go to a different label- but that's a another story.

"Hello, Kaya," Nae smiles and lets me into her nice, warm house.

"Hello," I smile brightly.

"What happened? You look too cheery. Your cheeks look a bit flushed and your eyes are bright." Nae giggles as we walk to her kitchen.

"Oh nothing in particular." I giggle. Sex.

Suit yourself," Nae winks and laughs, "What can I help you with?"

"Yeah, I need a favor- could you somehow get my pictures on this camera safely developed without the press seeing it? I don't have one of those picture printers attached to the computer." I hand her my silver camera.

"Yeah of course! James actually- James! Come here for a second would you?" Nae yells at the ceiling.

"James is here?" I ask. I hope he doesn't act all nervous around me. I don't like it.

James appears in the kitchen entrance; his shirt was splattered with paint.

"Nae, you're running out of paint for that last wall." James blushes. I was afraid he would do that.

"That can wait. Kaya needs some photographs developed. Could you take them to your house?"

"Yeah sure. I have a room only for photography and prints. Would you like to learn?" He asks me.

Uh...

I see Nae roll her eyes. "Uh...actually Dougie is waiting for me back home. I promised him I'd be back soon." I play with my fingers.

"Home? You two live together now?" Nae pipes up.

"No not yet," I bite my lip, "perhaps in the near future maybe?" I softly laugh and blush.

"Don't let Blogworthy.com here that." Izzy, Harry's quiet girlfriend smiles and walks into the kitchen.

"How are you?" I ask and we double kiss on the cheek.

"Fine. Just running an errand that Oliver asked Harry to do but Harry doesn't want to do it." She rolls her eyes and hands Nae a folder.

"Ah I see. The folder of all McFLY's expenses. That's fun mathematics right there," Nae chuckles and puts it with a small pile of purple folders.

I notice James looking at me so I shuffle my feet and look away, "Okay Nae, I'm off. And James would you drop it off at Dougie's place by next week?"

"Yeah I can do that." He nods.

"Cool; thanks." I wave to the three of them and let myself out. When I got in the car and started the engine, Karlie called.

'Hello, my sweet!" I coo.

"Kaya," Karlie sounds serious, "I need you to cancel any plans you have tomorrow."

"Why?" I ask as I drive down the wet street.

"Because the press is noticing Blogworthy.com a lot lately and they're making it worse. And if you want people to see your new movie next year, you need to have a press conference and answer any question they have." She sounds too worried.

"Fine. I haven't been on that website in a while. Is it that bad?"

"Bad enough to get your father flustered. The website reached him all the way in L.A. and the press there won't stop bothering him there too."

"That's not that bad," I lie to myself and turn on the window wipers and speed down an empty road.

"And the blogs are recalling very similar events that you were involved in and making them ten times worse."

"Like what?" I ask and slow down as I reach the apartment complex.

"They're telling people that you do not have any civilized manners at a dinner table, burping and spitting and flinging food. And remember that one night you and I drove up to Cambridge to explore possible settings with the director? The blogger turned that into an affair story, saying you have two lovers instead of one. It even has a picture of you two smiling at each other."

I bite my lips, "What's up with everyone wanting me to cheat on my secret boyfriend?"
"It's fun to read," Karlie admits.

"Fine. I got James and Nae to develop my pictures. You should be proud."

"Wow, Kaya! You're following the rules!"

I roll my eyes and park. I stay in the car though because people are walking right outside the apartments.

"Wait a minute..." Karlie mumbles.

"What?" I ask. I'm so thankful for dark car windows. The group turned out to be McFLY fans.

Lovely young ladies...

"A new blog just popped up!" She squeaks.

"What does it say?" My heart thumps.

"Uh..." Karlie sounds nervous, "It says that last night you met up with the unknown Cambridge bloke again at a pub and got drunk silly and they have quotes from witnesses to prove it. And then there's a picture of you talking to a guy that actually really does look like the back of the director."

"What the fuck?" Now I am officially pissed, "It was just Yumi and I having a good time together! And I was turning down that boy! "

"I know."

"And I wasn't that drunk!" I scream.

"I know."

"And I'm only seeing Dougie! No one else! Damn it Karlie! These rumors wouldn't be happening if we could just go public! It's not fair! Who can I trust now, Karlie?"

"I don't-"

"Know! Exactly!" I hit the steering wheel. The groups of rabid fan girls are gone. I see Tom pull up and park next to me in his mini cooper. "IT'S SOMEONE FROM OUR CIRLCE! IT'S NOT FAIR! WHAT DO THEY WANT FROM ME? FROM US! WHY CAN'T THEY JUST LEAVE DOUGIE AND ME ALONE? FUCK WHAT DID I DO TO THESE STUPID BLOGGERS WHO DON'T HAVE A LIFE? DO THEY WANT US TO BREAK UP OR SOMETHING?" And then I start to cry as I lean my head on the steering wheel. The car horn honks. It's like I'm a volcano and I just erupted big time. I hang up on Karlie who was trying to calm me down. I hear a knock on the window. I look up to see Tom looking at me. I sigh and get out of the car.

"Are you okay?" Tom frowns as I shiver, "I heard you yelling."

"Yeah I'm good." I mumble, "Just frustrated at the world." I wipe my eyes to clean up the tiny tears.

"I know how that feels. I'm sorry." Tom puts an arm around my shoulders and we walk to Dougie's flat.

I hug him back as we walk, "How do you and Gio fight the press? The whole country knows about your girlfriend yet they don't bother you two."

Tom shrugs, "They used to. Not sure. Gio's a strong woman. Of course, there are times when we argue but that's the price we have to pay. That blog- it'll pass. Dougie ignores it too and he doesn’t believe any of that rubbish. He told me so. You should too. And don't worry about what people think. We all know you're not cheating on him. He knows it."

I look up at Tom as we walk to Dougie's door, "I would rather die, than hurt him like that."