Firedown Sun

My leg jiggled up and down, twice the rhythm of the ticking clock up above Leirre's head. Actually, there were six clocks altogether. The one above his head, one to his right, one to his left, a little light-up one on his desk, a little one on the little table where a snow-white Karina bush sat in its little pot, and the last on the opposite table on the other side of the room, with yet another bush in an identical black, metal pot.

I came to the conclusion that he was possessed.

"Aren't Karina bushes fascinating?" he asked me in that same hushed, not-so-friendly nice voice. "No matter what hardships it faces, no matter what natural disaster it goes through, no matter if it snows, rains or if there's an earthquake, it always survives. Some would call it a miracle. Others say it's a disgusting weed."

I swallowed. "And your opinion?"

He licked his lips. "Weed. By far, a weed."

"So why do you keep it here?" My voice was trembling.

"To see if, in the end, I can destroy it. To see if it really is a miraculous, immortal living thing. Which, as I think we both know, will not be how this story turns out."

I blinked and breathed out slowly, turning my gaze to stare at an empty space on the teal wall. I couldn't bear to look at that smile anymore. That frozen, fake smile that was supposed to be comforting.

"What do you want?" I hissed, counting the seconds he took to answer.

There was silence for six seconds. If another six showed up in the next few minutes, I was going to scream. "I think you know why you're here. Does 'late night out' ring any bells? 'Rebellious teenagers found'? 'Meeting in the woods'? 'Discovery of secret organizations within our city'?" He shook his head in disappointment. "Kitten, these aren't uplifting messages."

"So why are you spouting them at me? I'd prefer to stay in somewhat a good mood today!"

He chuckled, and I realized I'd broken my pact to keep my focus somewhere else. I lowered my gaze again and stared at the floor. It was a very nice floor. Clean, sparkling. I could almost see my reflection in it. And what could I see in that reflection? Anger, confusion, worry, stubbornness.

But there was no rebellion. Couldn't they understand that? I might fight back in my own way, but I didn't want to actually overthrow the leaders or anything! That was insane! It was immoral and stupid and impossible! Even if I wanted to become the next Nimeous Bloom, I'd never make it. Because even that long lost hero of mine had ended up disappearing. So I probably wouldn't last five minutes against the leaders in the sun.

"I suppose you're right," Leirre Talma said. "Let's start this off on a lighter note. How are you doing? Are you enjoying having your wall up and running now? It must be so much better to have it behaving itself."

In that second, I knew he knew. He knew everything, from the night I burnt the wall to the real meaning behind the meeting in the woods, to the occasional fights I was having with my parents. He knew I was a natural fighter but that I wasn't actually doing anything to destroy the city. He knew.

I was a Karina bush. I survived the worst of storms, despite the fact everything else died off. I didn't go away, even when trial after trial came at me. I stood strong and faced it without so much a blink of an eye. And sooner or later, I would blossom.

But I'd still always be a weed to Leirre. I'd always be a challenge. His mission was to get rid of me once and for all, but give me a chance to live at first. Care for me, and then cut me off and destroy me. My mission was just to prove him wrong, to let him know I wasn't backing down and I wouldn't be easily won over.

So how much could a Karina bush stand? And when did it blossom? When did it become something beautiful to be admired? Not just a weed that never went away, something you had to try and dispose of but it kept poking up again among all the perfect, obedient grass?

If I was the representative of such a remarkable plant, then almost certainly the bush wouldn't live forever. I was too moronic to ever be immortal. If I was given eternal life, I'd find some way to screw it up.

I got to my feet. "If you were so smart, you would have told us what a malfunction really was. It's something that went wrong! Admit it, Leirre!"

He laughed right out loud. "Now why would I do that, Kitten? I can't tell the public that, they'd get upset."

"So what if they get upset? It's better than being lied to!"

"We're not lying to anyone. We're justifying the truth."

"Oh, right. Because that's completely different!"

He smiled sweetly. "It is, actually. If you would just let me explain-"

"You've had your chance to explain, and you didn't. You said you couldn't say you messed up. And that's all the explanation I need. That's all your precious public needs!"

Leirre's eyes darkened a bit, but he didn't lose that smile. He swept back a loose lock of his dark hair with his fingers, licking his lips again. Why did he keep doing that? It was like he was devouring words. Eating the truth. Spitting out lies. Swallowing everyone's questions. Biting down on them so they could never be answered.

"Kitten," he murmured carefully, "you may need a specific explanation, but isn't it a bit selfish to expect me to just meet your needs? I have an entire school to run, and I can't let you be happy while everyone else gets upset and scared. So why not... just twist a few words? Make it sound nicer? For the sake of the little ones, of course. We wouldn't want to give them nightmares, would we?"

"Nightmares from your lies? Ha, that's a laugh."

"Young lady, you're in very hot water right now," he warned. "Do NOT talk to me that way."

"Your malfunction thing's dead! Sure, the walls, the Telos, they're working now. Wonderful. But what about the weather control, huh? What happened to that, Leirre? Wasn't that the whole thing? We were trying to fix whatever went wrong with the control? So we'd have a few changes in the robotic setup of the city? Great, now that that's settled, fix the snow! We've dealt with your crap, so keep your end of the deal and clean up your mess!"

He stood and gestured toward the door. "I believe you need to go to homeroom now. The announcement should sound any second now. Do you need escorting there?"

"No, I'll be fine." I didn't want to be escorted by HIM.

"Good, good." He licked his thin lips again, like he'd just finished a delicious meal. "Have a wonderful day, Kitten Zigbol." He hurried to the door and opened it politely.

I remembered to give him a smile and a, "good day to you, too," as I walked out into the hallway, my bag now weighing three hundred tons, pounding against my back and absolutely KILLING my shoulders.

Only when I sat down in Farrens' did I regret everything I'd screamed at the school head. I was sure to be in even deeper trouble now. Just what I needed, right? Another thing for my parents to stare at me for and question me about at the dinner table.

I put my elbows up and cupped my face in my hands, letting out a gigantic sigh as I leaned across my desk.

Why can't I ever keep my mouth SHUT?

*

Sorin hated me today. "Cataclasm," he shouted, slamming his fist down on my desk, "repeat the thirteenth rule AGAIN!"

"Kitten," I corrected. "Uh-"

"No, wrong already! Don't say 'uh' or 'um' EVER!"

"U..." I bit down on my lip and cleared my throat to start over. "The thirteenth regulation is: never wander outside the city limits without an adult..." As he walked away, I added under my breath, "Because otherwise you could end up falling off a cliff or being torn apart by a hungry wild animal..."

"That's enough smart mouthing, Catamenia. Now why is this rule important BESIDES the danger?"

Um... "Well, because we shouldn't question it-"

"Oh, that's absolutely... INcorrect."

"I'm sorry, Sorin. I didn't read it last night."

He laughed demonically and leaned over me, claw-like fingers wrapping under the edges of my desk. "See, Catclaw, this is why we do our homework. And what fun activities were you entertaining yourself with other than doing what I assigned you?"

I shrugged. "Probably something stupid."

There were a few snickers, but I wasn't in the mood to laugh at my own sick humor.

Sorin let go of my desk, knuckles white, apparently giving up on me. "Alright, then, Kishka, but don't make a habit of it. I'll come down harder the next time."

My head fell against my desk and I groaned. I was obviously an idiot.

"Alright, then," Sorin announced, "Who would like to tell me what thirteen is really all about? Who, indeed? Ah, Lune. Yes, why don't you delight us in the REAL answer?"

I couldn't help but turn slightly to catch his eye. My entire body felt like it was on fire, and I hated it. Stay away, stay away, my mind warned. Don't go near him, it'll only make it worse!

I couldn't help but know how true that was. If I felt this way when I was sitting several desks away from him, then what would my reaction be standing right beside him?

To be honest, I really didn't want to know. But then again, the thought of being near him... was hypnotizing.

Blinking and looking away, I laughed under my breath, without much humor, really, and shook my head to clear it, or maybe just to give me a bad headache. Get a hold of yourself, Kitten, I hissed mentally. You really ARE an idiot.

To make matters worse, next, in Life Studies, we were studying Karina bushes. It was like this was Leirre's plan to haunt my every step, to really attempt to bring about my destruction. As we read paragraphs- slowly, since we were never required to read much, unless reading a clock counted, or a sign above a door with someone's name, or the simple articles in the paper every morning- in a humongous, thick packet Deactaviss handed out to us, I began drawing a shriveled, hunchbacked half-Macuruna, half-human kreature licking its paper thin lips, grinning in an uncomforting nice way, its fingers curling into razor sharp claws. At its feet was a girl with a side ponytail and a withered Karina bush with a single red blossom amongst the white petals clenched in her fist.

I noticed that Zarther Summon raised his hand practically for every question. That was right. He liked plants. His parents weren't Gardeners, but he wanted to be...

When Deactaviss called on me to answer something I hadn't heard, I just shrugged, glancing toward Zarther as if to say, "Well, I don't know, but you could ask HIM now, couldn't you?" But of course she didn't choose him. Teachers had to pick on people that were the least prepared, the ones who didn't know the subject well enough. The ones that could care less about everything, like me.

I leaned over my drawing and added the initials KZ at the bottom. Kitten Zigbol. Or, according to Sorin, everything EXCEPT for Kitten.

And according to Leirre, I was nothing but an everlasting weed that refused to be imprisoned in his evil clutches. I was just something he'd eventually track down and set the hellhounds of the city on. Maybe even Dasumne. Fate would decide for me to die at the hands of the mother of someone I had just recently acquired a love for. A stupid, irrational, impossible love. Or at least, a very strong-willed, crushing appreciation for.

I could picture it, too. Dasumne causing the end of my existence. Dasumne laughing as I died. Lune standing over her, watching silently. Lune, fading slowly away into the black and never ever going to be in my clutches again.

Maybe he never would be. Not with so many people in this city hating me just for living. Did I even want that to happen? Did I want to let this crush take over?

I scribbled angrily across my sketch and sighed. No, I didn't want that to happen, no matter how much it killed me to stand by and watch as he laughed and joked around and became increasingly more my Prince Charming, my knight in shining armor, my hero and rescuer.

My demise.

World History was just another boring learn-about-Monten-and-how-great-it-is-but-not-about-the-almost-total-world-obliteration day. Robotics was altogether the same as any other day, studying how certain mechanisms worked and how to make our own little versions of flying robbies. Lune's of course, began fluttering around like it had been born working. Jodancer said making robbies was simple. All you did was connect a few wires and twist a couple peices of metal around the next, hold the solar panels out so it could collect enough energy, and then it would fly.

Mine began smoking the second I touched it. Jodancer quickly swiped it away and made sure no one got hurt as flames sprouted from its metallic edges.

"I'm sorry!" I screamed as she tried to douse the flames and throw the thing away. "I didn't mean to do that, I was just following directions!"

Lune's robby bobbed in the air perfectly all around the room for several minutes, soon joined by others clumsily trying to mimick its actions but not quite in the same, graceful way.

Jodancer came back, hair in a slight disarray and her eyes bugging wide. "Class, the purpose of robbies is for them to follow your every order, as long as the action is in their capability system They can shift in size and shape at will, and they're very handy. They can tie your shoes, open doors, and even sing you to sleep. Use them... wisely." She looked like she was about to fall, so Jaz and Zarther Summon helped her to a seat and asked if she needed a glass of water. She hardly seemed to comprehend the question.

Fire ignited within me as Lune came nearer. "You gave her quite a fright," he whispered to me. "You doing okay today?"

I shrugged, continuing to stare at the floor. "I feel horrible," I muttered. "I wish I wasn't such a failure."

"You're not a failure, Kitten. You're just better at creating flames than a robby."

"Oh. That's... helpful."

Laughing, he held out his hand, where his very own robby sat, twitching every so often, like it was dying to leap back into the air with its brothers in flight. "You can have mine. I have plenty at home. I'm good at making them, and I don't need another one. My mother might not want another nuisance in the house, anyway."

I finally allowed myself to glance up at him. And my reaction wasn't so bad. I just smiled. I couldn't help it. Just seeing him made me want to smile and laugh and never move away. "Thank you," I said, taking it from his hand. It fluttered close to my face and cooed in a cute, robot-voice way. "Are you sure you don't want him? He's very handy, after all."

Lune shrugged, like he didn't care if it could count to a billion. "Like I said, I have enough. And you look like you could need a bit cheering up today."

I nodded. "Yes, it's been quite an interesting day so far."

"Well..." He started to move away, and I knew it was almost time for class to end. "You look very nice, by the way." The announcement sounded, but he didn't even flinch. "Have a good day, Kitten." And he walked out the door.

The robby chirruped sadly, like he was sad to see his creator go. I was, too.

I gave a sigh and patted the little robby's head. "What shall I call you, huh?" Slipping my bag over my shoulder, I thought through my small collection of names that seemed robot-ish.

"Baine," I whispered. "What do you think of that, little robby?" He did a flip in the air and made a sound like a bell ringing. I smiled at that, and he fell into my outstretched hand. Patting his head, I ordered softly, "Shut off now. We've got a long day ahead of us, and I don't want you using up your energy. Good night, Baine."

Baine sang his own little lullaby for a few seconds, the tune sounding remarkably like that of the Surface of the Sun. Then his flickering green and red lights switched off, and he become nothing but a hunk of sleeping metal. I placed him in the main pocket of my school bag and headed off to lunch.

*

"Great. Another Gathering. What next? Will we have to stand up in front of the entire school and do the jig?"

I glanced up as the two girls walked by. They were seventeen-year-olds. I hardly ever laid eyes on them when they were this close. As they slid through the aisle, I smiled slightly. It was nice to know the older kids knew how to complain, too.

Leirre stood, grinning at each one of us- except for me, naturally- and anticipating the next few minutes. Everyone- not me- turned their complete focus towards him and waited for him to speak.

What did I do? Well, I decided it was time for a little nap. Deliberately and carefully enough he might notice me amongst the crowd, I leaned so far back in my chair I was nearly sliding off, and I placed my feet up on the seat in front of me so that his face was blocked from my sight. If he noticed, I couldn't tell. But I couldn't help but grin as I lost myself in darkness when I shut my eyes.

The other kids go to Gathering, I go to sleep.

They announced it in the middle of lunch. "EVERYONE attend Gathering," Leirre's voice boomed from the speakers- commonly known as the all-knowing boxes, but mostly as just a private joke among us sixteen-year-olds. I knew, head snapping up at the announcement, that he had emphasized "everyone" just in case I had thought about skipping. And, naturally, that idea HAD crossed my mind...

"Good afternoon," the school head called- most likely licking his lips like he always did before he was about to spit out lies and false hopes- brightly from his microphone, bringing me back to the present. I sighed and waited for it to be over. It was probably just some stupid thing about how the malfunction was still in process, and how, although the walls were back to normal, the weather would stay the same or, possibly, get worse. So I wasn't thoroughly pleased to be here. Not hardly.

But his following words were quite a shock. My eyes burst open as he said them, and I sat up in a flash. WHAT?

He said, "The weather control will be up and running in two more days. Which means... the snow will be gone. Isn't it wonderful?"

I couldn't help but stare up at Leirre Talma. He wasn't that stupid, was he? He wasn't so incredibly ridiculous enough to actually listen to the screaming rants of a sixteen-year-old girl saying that his plan wasn't going to work? But he had. He WAS. The snow was going away.

The snow.

Was leaving.

"I figured it would be appropriate to let this be known among you... students." When he paused, I could have sworn his eyes slithered so very close to where I sat. Not quite directly at me, but I got the picture. "So no more worries. The sunshine will reappear in just a few days!"

Of course it would. But what about the stars, Leirre? Were they ever going to come back? And what about the Teachers and leaders that used to tell the truth?

Some would say all that was taken away was all that had brought about the destruction of the olden people. But then there were some, like Leirre Talma and me, who knew infinitely better than to be fooled by that.

And if I was his doomed little Karina bush, then he was a Snorkel. A kreature that could tongue out flames but didn't know how to control them. Whereas the rebel was going to be the one to find out how to prove Mother Nature wrong. One day, fire would no more be a danger. It wouldn't burn you. And so far, as a Karina bush, I was doing alright on that part. Because those snow-white plants couldn't burn.

But Snorkels, if burned from the inside out, would be utterly finished off in a matter of seconds.

So, in the end, no matter how long the rebel-eaters controlled everything and everyone, the ones who knew the truth would survive.

It was just a question of whether or not those survivors would belong to this generation or survivors a couple thousand years down the road. Maybe my great-great-great-great-etcetera great granddaughter or grandson would decide they were sick of the Order and wanted to actually win the battle between truth and lies, light and dark, good and evil, strong and stronger, controlled and controllers. Maybe my side would actually beat out the leaders. Maybe my descendants would be able to crush Leirre's descendants.

I had to admit, imagining that was AMAZING.

Dismissed from Gathering, I grabbed my bag and headed out of the Gatorium, sighing with relief as I got outside the stuffy room. Finally. I could breathe! I felt slightly claustrophobic as people pressed up against me when they walked past, and I searched in vain for Lune.

Ah, no, DON'T do that! my mind screamed. That's a really really really REALLY bad idea, Kitten! Don't do it! Don't-

"Hello. Looking for someone?"

Grinning, I spun full circle and looked up at him. "No one in particular. But, um..." I pretended to scrutinize him from head to toe. "You'll do."

Lune laughed and shook his head, rolling his eyes. "Aw, you don't mean that. I KNOW you don't really hate me. You're just lying to yourself, Kitten. When are you going to admit that you actually do like me?"

I gasped quietly, but just scoffed sarcastically and blurted, "When are you going to stop trying to be such a jerk? MY business, remember?" And I flipped myself around, heading toward Skill Training. But I slowed a bit, so it wouldn't look like I was actually waiting for him, but also not a complete go-away-I-hate-you aura. He caught up within seconds, still grinning, hazel eyes sparkling in the light.

He looked so amazingly attractive for a second that I lost myself in those eyes. And then he looked over at me, and I had to pretend to be that grumpy, sarcastic Kitten again. I sighed in "annoyance", muttering, "We have the next class together, don't we? Crap. I have to deal with you AGAIN."

"Should I take that robby back, if you still 'hate' me so much?"

I shook my head, really scared of that possibility than anything else. I didn't let it show in my eyes, though. I told him, "Baine was a gift. You can't take him from me now. You gave him to me, and that means he's MINE. No stealing allowed."

"But if you like him so much, why isn't he out in the air, flying behind you?"

"BeCAUSE," I snarled, "I like him so MUCH that I don't want him to DIE. Solar energy lasts only so long, you know. Or don't you know that? Does the crazy, all-knowing Lune NOT know everything?" I pretended to gasp. "Oh no! The world's going to end!"

He stared at me, but he was smiling. "Sheesh, Kitten, If I knew you were going to explode on me, I would have worn a protective mask. Warn me next time."

And I laughed. But as we continued toward the classroom, I began to wonder if he really did mean that, that I needed to warn him. Had I offended him? And thus began my five-minute long inner monologue of what and what not to say around the Drumer boy.