Firedown Sun

I took a deep breath and stepped toward the guard at the doors of the Dining Hall. Pausing, I swallowed and took in this guard's huge, bulky form. And yet it was remarkably difficult not to laugh when he spoke, because his voice was tenor and gentle.

"Welcome to the Sun, Kitten Zigbol," he said, smiling graciously, reaching for the golden door handle to let me in. "That's a beautiful flower you're wearing. Karina blossom, isn't it?"

"Yes, thank you," I answered. "Naro picked it out for me."

"Oh, he's a nice boy."

I found it hard not to blush. "Yes, I noticed that."

"I'm Chane, by the way. If you ever need help with something and Naro can't be there, just press the Call Button on your bed's headrest and request me. I will always be at your service."

I smiled at him, finding I rather enjoyed his company already. "Alright. Thanks, Chane. I will."

Then I entered the Grand Dining Hall and Amasa stood up to greet me.

"Good MORNING, Kitten!" he called in an overly-friendly way. I gathered he must have been ordered by Erastus to be on his best behavior, since the Head Leader was watching him critically. But, after I answered Amasa's greeting with one of my own, Erastus turned his head my way and nodded at me with a sweet smile. It was stunningly easy to return the gesture.

"Morning," the other Leaders called promptly, aiming variously sized smiles my way.

I bowed my head in respect toward each of them, noticing the obvious emptiness at Blessing Ember's seat and feeling sickeningly satisfied. My anger had mellowed a bit overnight and I felt guilty for such a strong reaction just by seeing her face. But even Naro had understood why I'd freaked so badly, after he knew the whole story. So I decided I would just have nothing to do with her and she apparently could care less about my existence as well. At this rate, my plan couldn't go wrong.

"Our Lady wakes up late," Amasa told me, his dark green eyes shining in an odd way. "Pray, do sit in her seat until she joins us."

I waited for that to sink in, then nodded. I preferred silence when put up next to a hungry snake.

As I sat down, a golden-rimmed crimson plate automatically appeared over my gleaming, aurulent place-mat. It literally seemed to glimmer as I picked up a fork; the shape of the eating utensil was practically reflected on the mat and it made me stare. What COULDN'T the Leaders do?

"Do enjoy your meal," Amasa aimed at me when the food appeared, just as glorious and beautiful and rich as the last meal I'd seen before the Leaders. I looked up at Amasa and my eyes narrowed a bit.

"You as well," I replied, and we all ate.

Breakfast consisted of egg and sausage rolls, tomatoes stuffed with garlic and some sort of vinegar that burned my tongue but tasted delicious, thick toast drowning in honey, fried potatoes with ketchup, and a creamy drink reminding me slightly of grapes. With each bite, I felt like I would burst with contentment. I couldn't eat enough of it, and yet even the small portions on my plate filled me up so completely, I had to stop.

There was no conversation held with me, just among the Leaders themselves, discussing some things they'd thought of last night, about what to do about the abandoned hospital. The bald one claimed it was taking up space and should be removed, only he didn't know what the land should be used for. Crimm suggested some new trees to be planted, but Amasa bellowed it took too much time, and who would volunteer their time to plant them anyway? Surely not one of them! Erastus was harder to understand today, like his words were garbled, but I caught his opinion on the matter well enough. He liked the thought of more trees, or maybe a pond.

"The citizens could iceskate in the winter," I thought he said, but it didn't make any sense for him to care about skating, so I just kept eating, thinking to myself that if I was ever to become Leader, all this debating and responsibility to the city would drive me crazy.

Crimm sat at the opposite end of the table as Erastus, so he sat to my right. He cleared his throat, setting his napkin on his now empty plate, leaning toward me. "Kitten?"

"Yes?" I wiped my mouth with my own napkin, then placed it down in the same fashion he had.

"You don't have to decide now." He looked at me sincerely, and his eyes stared at me intensely behind his golden glasses, a gray-blue that looked both peaceful and stormy. "You don't have to choose whether you want to stay or not."

I looked down, the reality of why I was here crushing down on me. I hadn't really thought about it since I arrived. The reaction I had to Blessing had kind of threw everything off...

"Oh," was all I could think to say.

He exhaled deeply, as if not happy with my answer. "Listen, Kitten, what you're doing, it's incredible. You're defiantly keeping yourself YOU. You don't want to change, right? You don't want to become someone you're not."

I shook my head slightly, but not to deny it. My breathing faltered. "How do you know that about me?"

He lowered his voice. "I've been observant of you ever since you were born."

"Why? What's so intriguing about me?"

"Well, quite frankly," he said, "Everything. And I don't want you to change to the smallest degree."

A shudder ran through me, and I felt my heart go crazy in my chest, and it hurt to even try to breathe. It was as if someone had pressed me into a lemon squeezing machine and started cranking it down on me. We had one of those in our Cellar, but we never used it because we got lemon juice out of the wall. But I remembered the handle, how you just turned it, and the top came down on the lemon, and then in the end, all that was left was a dried pulp and peel and the juice.

Only, I wasn't a lemon, so what was left of me was rather hard to identify. IF there was anything left at all.

A question rose in my mind, making the tightening sensation in my chest worse: WHY does Crimm care about you? Why do all these people who are supposed to hate you want to protect and give the best to you?

"Well," called Amasa in a disturbingly friendly voice. "Is our young guest of honor ready for our discussion?"

I blinked rapidly a few times, unsure if I would be able to speak. "I guess," I croaked.

A man just as wrinkled and ancient-looking as Erastus laughed. "No reason to be nervous, young one."

I smiled at him, blanking on his name and afraid of talking to him and getting it wrong.

He lifted a shaking hand. "You," he said, speaking and pointing to me, "have great spirit. You're very... intelligent."

"Oh. Thank you."

He nodded, spilling the grape-flavored cream stuff a little as he drank from his glass. Some of it dribbled down his chin, and I could only register that he didn't function as well as the Head Leader himself, who had to be ten years older or more.

"Yes, you're exactly right, Fora," murmured the bald one. Jans, I recalled. Jans Redlock. And so the other old one was named Fora. "Yes, she has a stunning amount of stubbornness. That actually runs pretty well when it comes to ruling a city. You have to want to win."

Being stubborn helped me here? Then why was it all the adults back home were forcing it down our throats that we couldn't fight anybody, that we had to give in to whatever anyone else said? I suddenly pictured the black eyes of the Lights and swallowed. Was that still happening down there? Was my mother okay? What about Dad? My friends? Anyone? All the thoughts of home made me sick to my stomach, because hadn't I just been thinking a few minutes ago IF I was a Leader, I'd hate the debates? I was already thinking in the if mode! I wasn't completely rejecting the option of staying! Why? What could possibly hold me here?

"Stubborn and hard as nails," laughed the giant one who I said I hated last time. I shot him an apologetic smile, and he threw back a grin. "But inside, probably as soft as feathers," he added louder.

I blushed. "Am not."

The laughter around the table that followed eased my tension. These guys weren't so bad. I almost felt comfortable here. Maybe Amasa was tough to swallow, but so was I, right? Maybe he was like me- hard-boiled on the outside, awfully tender on the inside but absolutely refusing to admit it. But when I thought about how I cried a lot despite my hostility and mistrust toward most people, I couldn't picture Amasa doing the same and quickly ruled out any possibility of him being even close to soft.

"Oh, Stark, don't be mean to the girl," said Jans, who hadn't even really cracked a smile. His eyes were dull, a bluish hue, but quite similar to green. "She'll be mean back, when she gets the chance."

"That's no problem," Stark replied, cracking his knuckles. "Bring it on, little girl."

"No violence," whispered Fora, a warning.

"Oh, why not?" Stark complained.

"Erastus?" Fora mumbled. "Could you, uh...?"

"Certainly." Erastus got to his feet and raised his glass and small, silver spoon. Clicking them together gently, he announced, "I call this meeting to order! Everybody quiet, please. Yes, you, too, Stark. No games now."

Stark looked disappointed, and I smiled, thinking I liked him very much. He was a clown, but compared to what I thought the Leaders would be like, he was great.

"I officially declare Kitten Zigbol as a guest among us, and she shall be treated as such. Understood? Also, I'm guessing she doesn't know all of us personally, and since she's been brought here to decide whether to join us on the sun or go back to Ground Level, I believe it's only fair she meet every one of us." He paused a moment, to clear his throat and take a drink. "She will be given an hour each, and as she will need lunch, at eleven thirty, she will have a two hour break, and then she shall continue in her order. Now, Kitten, what is your order?"

It took me a second to comprehend all he said. Hesitating, I asked, "What exactly do you mean? I get to choose who to go to first?"

"Absolutely. You're our guest. We'll serve you to whatever it is you wish."

"Whatever I wish?" I sighed. "Well, you know one of my wishes, and you can't fulfill that one, apparently."

Crimm reached over unexpectedly and took my hand. I smiled a bit at him, and he said, "I know you want to go home, Kitty, but it'll be alright here. I assure you."

The way he called me Kitty reminded me so much of home, I couldn't help but trust him. He hadn't been making it up, that he'd been watching me. Maybe that was a little weird, but if you're up in the sky all day long, what else are you going to do? I guess I'd watch random people, too.

With my hand still in Crimm's, I turned to face Erastus. "I'll visit you first. It makes sense, doesn't it? Meeting the Head Leader first. It's only proper."

I was playing it up, because I wanted him to like me enough to maybe feel bad enough for me to send me home, and I think Crimm knew that, because he let out a deep breath and his hand slid away from mine after one last pat on my knuckles.

Amasa chuckled once. "How quaint."

I ignored him. "Erastus?"

He smiled easily. "That suits me. After, I believe Gray would be the closest Leader to visit, and then you may have lunch, and we'll go to that point, alright? You feel comfortable with that, everyone?" Erastus glanced around at the other Leaders first, but after they all nodded, he focused on me intently, as if I was the one that truly mattered, not them.

I nodded slowly. "Yes. I'm alright with that."