Without Love

“My darling little Serena,” Ronnie gushed and pulled Alanya in for a hug.

She’d been surprised when she found the house empty and was about to start a search for her two children when Jacob dragged her daughter through the front door.

“Hi mom,” Alanya said a little uncomfortable. “Please call me Alanya.”

Ronnie gave her a disbelieving glance. “Your father told me about that nonsense. I didn’t name you Serena for it not to be used.”

“Then I won’t answer you,” she said stubbornly.

“Serena!” her mother exclaimed in utter shock of Alanya’s behavior.

“Did someone say something?” she said out in the air and walked through till the kitchen.

Jacob found it best if he left quietly.

“Serena, what have gotten into you?” Ronnie asked her with concern filled voice. Alanya had changed dramatically in the year that passed since they last met.

“Noting,” Alanya sighed. She didn’t like to hear her mother upset. “I just prefer to be called Alanya.”

“Serena suits you better.”

“No it doesn’t!” she raised her voice and worked hard to calm down again. “Mom, I’ve changed. I like to be called Alanya and I fuck boys. Please deal with it or I can just call dad and say that I changed my mind.”

Ronnie stared at her with wide eyes for longer than a minute before she sighed. “Serena,” she said softly. “I really want you to stay, at least for the summer. And I already see you need a mother.”

Alanya snorted. “Living with dad and Michel is like living with two premenstrual women. Michel is great, he helps me out with the stuff dad is to ‘man’ to sort out.”

“And what kind of stuff is that?” Ronnie asked her suspiciously.

Alanya shrugged. “Birth control pills; that kind of stuff.”

“You’re already on the pill?” Ronnie realized how much she’d missed out of her daughter’s life.

“I’m not a little girl anymore,” she explained and looked away.

Ronnie saw the tear filled eyes Alanya tried to hide. “Honey,” she said softly. “I know that. I’m just taken off guard; Mac didn’t say anything about birth control pills. Do you have a boy-friend in New York you’re sexually active with?” Ronnie was a school nurse and wasn’t afraid to talk about those things with teenagers like most parents.

Alanya shook her head. “No, I just like sex,” she said truthfully.

“Fair enough, you are a teenager with raging hormones.”

“Can we change the subject now?” Alanya was already bored.

“Sure,” Ronnie smiled and brushed her hand over her cheek. “But I’m here if you need advises or someone to talk to.”

Alanya nodded. “Is it okay if I repaint my bedroom?”

“Of course,” Ronnie smiled. She’d do anything to make Alanya feel at home. “Do you need money for the paint?”

She shook her head. “No, that’s okay. Dad gave me some money to spend over the summer,” she said easily, hiding the almost lie. Alanya had a credit card her father had given her.

“Okay then, I’m sure you and Embry can take a drive up to Port Angeles soon.”

“That would be awesome,” she grinned. “I’ll be in my room if you need anything.”

Alanya walked down the hallway to her room and closed the door after her. She turned her radio on; being a music addict she had to have some kind of music on as often as possible. She grinned when Aretha Franklin’s ‘Respect’ was on.

She grabbed her hairbrush and used it as a microphone and danced around the room to the catchy rhythm with her eyes closed. She sang the lyrics as loud as she could. Alanya couldn’t brag about of a beautiful voice, but she cared very little about it. ‘Sing with the voice you have’ was her motto.

The song ended and Alanya turned the radio down and heard the muffled laughs coming from the doorway. Her brother with two friends – one she recognized as Paul – was crammed together and tried to hide their laughs. Paul was smiling at her in amusement.

“Can’t a girl sing in her own room anymore?” she asked them and rested her hand on her hip.

“You can do whatever the hell you want in your room Alanya,” Embry said as he shook his head. “We were just wondering if you wanted to go bathe with us.”

“Isn’t the water freezing?” she questioned them.

“Yeah, that’s the fun part,” Paul said and smirked at her. “Scared off a little adrenaline?”

She narrowed her eyes at him and tried to hide the smile that played on her lips. “No,” she said. “Just let me change; I’ll be out in five minutes.”

They left and Alanya hurriedly found a bikini, a short denim shorts and an over sized tee. She wore her long flowing dark hair in a high ponytail, revealing a tattoo saying the words ‘Sine Amore’.

She found the three boys out on the porch, chatting about things she didn’t want to know; car motors and difference between cross bikes and motorcycles.

“Ready?” Embry asked her.

She nodded with a smile and they started walking. She could feel Paul’s eyes on her back as she walked ahead of him.

“What does the tattoo say?” the boy she didn’t know the name off asked.

“Don’t you know Latin?” she questioned and gave him an unimpressed look over her shoulder.

He shook his head. “No, but I’m awesome at the Quileute language,” he said to her. “I’m Quil, by the way.”

“Maybe you could teach me something in Quileute sometime, Quil?” a smile made her way onto her lips.

She heard a smack instead off his reply.

“What the hell was that for?” Quil questioned in a slight whiny voice.

“You’re too busy babysitting Claire,” Paul said.

“Too bad you’re too lazy to learn anything about your roots then, fat head,” Quil said, not being scared off Paul’s reaction.

“Shut up, both of you,” Embry snapped, irritated by their bickering over his sister.

Alanya couldn’t help but laughed and linked her arm with her brother’s. “I can handle them myself, Emmy.”

He snorted. “’course you can.”

Alanya couldn’t hide her surprise when they reached the beach; several other groups of teenagers were gathered, enjoying the water and laying on blankets.

Embry laid down a blanket he’d brought and Alanya quickly discarded her clothes. She ignored the stares from the boys around her, including Paul.

“Come on,” she said to them with a smile. “Last one out is a wuss,” she called over her shoulder as she took off running into the water.

She ran until the water reached her thighs before she began swimming; but she didn’t go further than her feet could reach the bottom. Paul stopped next to her with a smirk on his lips.

“They are a pair of wusses,” he said with a superior look in his eyes.

Alanya glanced back to the shore and spotted her brother and Quil talking to a big buff guy, looking to be at least over twenty.

“Who’s he?” she questioned him.

“That’s just Sam,” Paul said and focused on Alanya.

She stared back at him and it turned into a battle of who could hold the stare the longest. Alanya won when Paul looked to the side for a split second.

“You’re freezing,” he noticed her lips turning a shade of blue.

She couldn’t stop her teeth from shattering. “And you aren’t?”

Paul shook his head and stretched his arms out for her. “I’m warm.”

Alanya took a step closer and let him wrap his strong arms around her. She relaxed her head on his shoulder and glanced up at his handsome face.

“Damn, you are hot,” she muttered and kept her eyes on his face.

“I know,” he said and smirked down at her.

Paul leaned his head closer to hers and let his lips graze hers in a quick yet soft kiss. Alanya closed her eyes momentarily before she leaned up to kiss him again.

Alanya was taken off guard by the intensity off the kiss; by the way his hand ever so softly brushed over her hair and cheek – she pulled away. They stared into each others’ eyes for a moment before she spoke.

“I’m not here to fall for anyone,” she was slightly out of breath.

Paul smiled softly and put his hand on her cheek. “I’ll catch you,” he said truthfully.

Alanya shook her head and removed his hand. “No, you don’t get it. I just want to have fun.”

Paul fell silent as he thought. “Then let’s have fun.”

“Maybe some other time,” she smiled at him before she stepped away and made her way to land.

She grabbed a towel and dried herself before she sat down at the blanket and noticed the frustrated look her brother was sending her.

“What?” she questioned him.

“What the hell was that?” he asked her just as Paul dumped down next to her.

Alanya shrugged and glanced at Paul. “He was just warming me, right Paul?”

“Yeah, she was freezing,” he said but couldn’t hide the amusement in his voice.

Embry was just about to attack Paul when Sam butted in.

He extended his hand towards Alanya. “I’m Sam; you seem to make quite an impression on people, Alanya.”

She grinned at him. “It’s what I do.”

Sam was about to respond when a group off two girls and a boy approached her. Alanya lifted a perfectly plucked eyebrow at them.

“Hi, I’m Jessica, this is Lauren and Mike,” Jessica was tiny, but her hair was brown wild curls; there was something about her that made Alanya curious.

Alanya rose and smiled at them. “Alanya, I just moved here.”

Lauren, a girl with really short blond hair talked. “Figured that out, I’ve never seen you around,” her voice was sarcastic. “We are having a beach party here later; you should come.”

“I’ll come,” she said; hoping to get the chance to know other people than her brother’s friends.

The trio walked away and again Alanya felt Embry’s angry eyes at her.

“What is your problem, Emmy?” she asked him and threw her hands in the air. “They just asked me to a party, not if I wanted to help them rob a bank.”

“I’m busy tonight and can’t watch you. You should stay in,” he said to her.

“The hell I won’t!” she said and gritted her teeth. “Paul will come with me.”

“Of course,” Paul said with a grin.

Embry gave him a warning glare.