Tell Me You're Not Alright

I could barely hear my heart beat over the loud screams and chants of the crowd. Each of the fans yelling for the guys, or chanting ‘Sevenfold’ when they would stop playing. However, my heart was racing from behind my chest, I’m sure if you could hear it, it sounded like the gallop of a horse trying to cross the finished line in a race.

I never in my life experience such an adrenaline rush, like the one I was having now. For several reasons, one, was that for the first time I was seeing the guys I grew up with play somewhere other than my moms garage. Brian was a better guitar player then I remembered, Johnny killed that bass, Jimmy could tear those drums up, Zacky just blew me away, and Matt? Well Matt could never disappoint me with his performance, his voice was amazing.

“You guys did amazing!” I said hugging my brother when he came off stage, whom though it was best to wipe his sweat on me.

“Thanks.” they all said in unison.

My eyes lingered around the room, until they fell on Matt. They trailed up his muscular frame and to his eyes, I locked my glaze in place and didn’t break it until Zacky cleared his throat.

“Come on, we are going to the bar.” He said from his spot near the door, he wrapped his arm around Dylan and pulled her out the door. I picked up my black purse from the corner and tossed it over my shoulder, by this time everyone had singled out, all except Matt.

“I hope you know your doing a shot with me.” He said grinning.

“Of course I do.” I said returning the grin.

I reached for the door handle, but felt Matts presence very close to my back, his hot breath on my neck.

“And a dance too.” he whispered.

I didn’t say anything just nodded and walked out the door, Matt following me. We made it to the back entrance of the venue where everyone was waiting with cabs.

I climbed into the cab that held Zacky and Dylan in it. “Hey, scoot over, no more room in the others.” Matt said grabbing the door just as I was about to close it. I gave a nod and scooted over.

“Fuck. Theres not enough room in this damn cab!” Zacky said from his position of squished against the door. I laughed.

“Here, I’ll make room. Meg sit on my lap so Zacky has more room.” Matt said patting his lap.

“He’ll be fine I-” was all I managed to get out before Matt pulled me on his lap. His arm rapped around my waist. It felt almost awkward, but I loved the feeling of him holding on to me. The cab ride was over, however, before things go to comfortable.

The familar burn of Jack Daniels sliding down my throat, was that of a comfort. A reminder of all the good times I'd had with the guys sitting around the table, and the good times that were sure to come with the girls that stole their hearts.

The shots kept coming, and we had no problem slamming them down. Hours into our drinking binge, the alcohol was taking over.

"Lets go dance." Matt said into my ear. I only nodded and stood up, pulling him up by his hand and pulling him to the dance floor. I wasn't sure what song was playing but I knew it was something I could dance to.

I rapped my left arm around his neck, allowing the other to dangle. I moved my hips back and forth. Our bodies were inches apart. His hands were roaming my sides freely, as they made their way to my hips, he gripped them firmly and pulled my body as close to his as possible.

"You still where that?" I said glancing at his neck, where the necklace I got him lay. It was a silver chain, that had M on it. I got it for him for his 19th birthday. Otherwise known as the day we shared our first kiss.

"Yeah." he whispered, now grinding his hips into mine.

As the song played on, and the song sung deeper in, my hands roamed more. His eyes didn't leave mine for even a second, he brought his face close to mine. Until I could feel his breath linger on my lips, it sent shivers down my spine.

He leaned in closer, nearly touch my lips. "Matt. Don't." I whispered.

He pulled his head back and looked into my eyes again. His gaze fell to the floor, and I dropped my arms from around his neck and walked off the dance floor, and out the door of the bar.

I walked to the alley beside the bar and leaned against the side of the building. I looked up at the stars, then closed my eyes. The chilly air around me was comforting to my heated body.

"Meg?" a voice spoke softle. I turned and seen Matt standing there. His hands stuffed in his pockets, looking at me with a soft face. "I'm sorry." he said.

When I didn't reply he continued to talk "I wanted to tell you that I'm also sorry for leaving that day without saying goodbye."

"Don't be. You know it wouldn't have made a difference." I said looking at the ground.

"It would have though. I just want you to forgive me so we can start over. I just want you to know that."

I shook my head and pushed myself off the wall and walked past him. I stopped when my hand was on the bar door and looked back at him.

"I can forgive Matt, but I'll never forget the pain I felt when you left. I never wanna fell that again, and I know if we started over, I would." with that I walked back into the bar.