False Relationships Seem So Transitory
Make the words come to life
When I first saw Bella, I felt like the world around me stopped. I had Jasper on my arm, but it felt like he'd just disappeared. It was only me and Bella.
Her ivory skin glowed in the artificial cafeteria light and her gorgeous brunette hair shone. When I was still alive, girls like Bella would've made my heart thud in my chest and my palms sweat. I still got nervous butterflies in my stomach, though, and I didn't know if I wanted to welcome the feeling or shun it. I missed the feeling of being this…affected by a person. Jasper sure didn't make him feel like that anymore. I don't think he ever really did in the first place.
When I first saw Bella that fateful day in the cafeteria of Forks High School, I made sure to laugh and smile as much as possible, so that maybe she'd fall in love with my smile, just like I fell for hers.
I wonder if something could've happened between Bella and me. I wonder if I hadn't stepped aside and let Edward have her, that she and I would have our own love story.
But she was Edward's blood singer. He longed for her blood more than anything else, and he constantly had to restrain himself. I never - not once - had the urge to hurt her. Of course, I noticed the sweet smell of the dark red, oxygenated blood flowing through her dainty veins, but it didn't control my entire being.
I would've been able to give her so much more…in my opinion. Instead of focusing all my thought capacity on making sure I didn't tear apart beautiful little Bella's throat, I could've allowed every thought that ran through my head be about her perfection, her natural gorgeousness, and how much I loved her. I still love her, more than anyone - more than Jasper, more than Carlisle, more than life, more than anything.
It was too late now, though. She would forever be Edward's. She was the mother of his child, his wife. As sweet and lovable as Renesmee was, I couldn't help but wish that she was never born, and that Bella left Edward before she was forced to change into one of us. She could've been so much more, and now she'd spend the rest of her life hiding.
I wish, in a way, that Bella had never even moved to Forks. She wouldn't have met Edward and never would've gotten her clumsy self wrapped up in a messy, confusing, awkward love triangle. But then again…if she'd never moved here, I would have never had the honor of meeting her.
No, that's a lie. I think fate would've brought us together one way or another.
Her ivory skin glowed in the artificial cafeteria light and her gorgeous brunette hair shone. When I was still alive, girls like Bella would've made my heart thud in my chest and my palms sweat. I still got nervous butterflies in my stomach, though, and I didn't know if I wanted to welcome the feeling or shun it. I missed the feeling of being this…affected by a person. Jasper sure didn't make him feel like that anymore. I don't think he ever really did in the first place.
When I first saw Bella that fateful day in the cafeteria of Forks High School, I made sure to laugh and smile as much as possible, so that maybe she'd fall in love with my smile, just like I fell for hers.
I wonder if something could've happened between Bella and me. I wonder if I hadn't stepped aside and let Edward have her, that she and I would have our own love story.
But she was Edward's blood singer. He longed for her blood more than anything else, and he constantly had to restrain himself. I never - not once - had the urge to hurt her. Of course, I noticed the sweet smell of the dark red, oxygenated blood flowing through her dainty veins, but it didn't control my entire being.
I would've been able to give her so much more…in my opinion. Instead of focusing all my thought capacity on making sure I didn't tear apart beautiful little Bella's throat, I could've allowed every thought that ran through my head be about her perfection, her natural gorgeousness, and how much I loved her. I still love her, more than anyone - more than Jasper, more than Carlisle, more than life, more than anything.
It was too late now, though. She would forever be Edward's. She was the mother of his child, his wife. As sweet and lovable as Renesmee was, I couldn't help but wish that she was never born, and that Bella left Edward before she was forced to change into one of us. She could've been so much more, and now she'd spend the rest of her life hiding.
I wish, in a way, that Bella had never even moved to Forks. She wouldn't have met Edward and never would've gotten her clumsy self wrapped up in a messy, confusing, awkward love triangle. But then again…if she'd never moved here, I would have never had the honor of meeting her.
No, that's a lie. I think fate would've brought us together one way or another.
♠ ♠ ♠
Poor Alice :( She has hope, though; I've always thought Bella was a lesbian.