I Can't Stay Away

Working merch got somewhat boring since it was just doing the same thing over and over although I did meet some pretty alright people. We were already two weeks into tour, Breathe’s set for the day started and right as it did Jon walked towards the merch tent.
“Jon what are you doing here this is supposed to be a secret relationship what if someone sees you?” I didn’t want to see him I was stupid for wanting him back.
“No one is going to see me, Breathe is on stage remember?” he said as got behind the merch table.
“But Ollie isn’t, Ollie could see you.” I insisted I was worried even though Ollie didn’t know what Jon looked like.
“Who cares, I wanted to see you.” He said trying to be cute but failed because it sounded demanding.
“Jon, I care Ollie promised to come by the tent so he could be here soon.”
“Kenny don’t worry.” He said rubbing my hips and pulling me closer to him as he kissed me.
“Damn Kenny that was a pretty hot kiss.” Ollie said. “When did you get a boyfriend?”
“Oh this? This isn’t my boyfriend this is Shaun I used to go to high school with him uh, I just don’t know he kissed me.” I was a horrible liar.
“That was the worst lie I’ve ever heard.” He said to me “If this is your boyfriend let me know so I can lay off and maybe stop flirting.” He laughed a little, I never even noticed he was flirting I guess I was blind.
“He isn’t my boyfriend Shaun is kind of like a friend with benefits I guess.” I don’t know why I stuck with the fake name.
“Yea but you should still back off.” Jon said “It seems pointless to flirt with someone who already has all she needs.” Ollie looked upset and I jabbed Jon in the chest.
“I’m sorry Oliver Shaun is idiotic, don’t listen to him, me and you can have a talk later I’m sorry I wasted your time.” I frowned this was bullshit.
“Next time I talk to one of my friends please just don’t even talk especially when I have to cover for you.” I was angry beyond words. “Just leave I don’t want to see your face!” he could tell I was angry so he didn’t even fight it he just walked away. Of course he would never apologize though that wasn’t part of his nature; he always had to be right.
I heard BC finish their last song and I was excited that I finally wouldn’t be alone at the tent or so I thought. All the guys rushed through the tent and left right away except one who I asked where they went and he explained they were going to have a smoke sesh in the bus. I had a million thoughts in my head the first one being.
“Hey do you think you can watch merch for me?” I asked and he agreed and then I walked towards Breathe’s bus. I opened the door and no one was smoking yet but everyone looked confused.
“Uh Kennedy what are you doing here?” Kyle asked.
“Smoking clears your mind right? It makes you chill as fuck right?” I asked.
“Yea I guess, why do you care Kennedy?”
“I know you guys are having a ‘smoke sesh’ I want in.” It probably seemed as if I was going crazy to Kyle he knew how I felt about drugs and such.
“I thought you hated drugs?” He was confused.
“I do but just let me do it! Don’t be my big brother right now I want this.” I felt as if I was going crazy.
“Just let her, It won’t hurt her. She’ll be fine and I’ll make sure nothing bad happens. I mean you can trust me I’ve been smoking since I was way younger.” Eric said, I couldn’t tell if he was still mad at me or if I should forgive him yet, but being friends with him would make it more difficult to hide Jon from him. I decided to stop thinking about it and I went in the bus and sat down next to Eric.
In this particular smoke sesh there were two ways to smoke going around the bus, A blunt and a bong. Eric told me that the blunt would be better for me so I trusted him. After everyone was done I definitely felt different but it was just a little different but I thankfully wasn’t thinking about Jon anymore because all I could focus on was how dry my mouth was and how hungry I was.
“I’m going to guess since it’s your first time you are starving and have a severe case of cotton mouth.” Eric said taking my thoughts right out of my head. I nodded it was embarrassing being the only one new to this.
“Good that means it worked.” He smiled. “Y’know you’re taking this better than a lot of first timers but if you ever want to smoke again don’t do it unless you’re with me.” He said to me as all of BC left except him, he then got up and pulled 2 beers out of the fridge and put some microwaveable burritos into the microwave for us to eat.
“You know you make it really hard to hate you right?” I smiled at him hazily.
“Then I think you should stop hating me, it’s not like it solves anything anyways.”
“I’ll think about it but I don’t know I already have enough drama in my life do I really need another friend?” I joked.
“What if I promise I won’t cause drama,” He said you could see him hoping I’d say yes.
“Fine! But only cause I miss you and you’re too good of a kid.” He hugged me and right then I got a text.
“Who’s the text from?” he asked as I pulled my phone out and saw it was Jon.
“Oh um, Kyle.” I said in a questioning tone trying to lie about it being Jon.
“Kyle’s at a signing, he would never text during a signing he wouldn’t be rude to the fans you know that.”
“Whatever I have to go take over my duties as merch girl now.” I said walking off the bus trying to avoid this but I could hear Eric’s footsteps behind me.
“Kenny Obviously it’s someone I don’t like so who is it, Jon or Ollie?” there wasn’t a way out of saying it was one of the two but I decided to go with the one he hated less.
“Oliver texted me, I didn’t want you to make a big scene like the other night. Sorry that I lied.” I shot him an apologetic look
“Don’t worry about it were friends again so I’ll work on trying to not be a douche cause you don’t like me when I’m a douche and I don’t like when you don’t like me.” I laughed at his dorkiness.
“I still have to go back to merch though, so I’ll talk to you later.” I said about to walk away.
“Hey remember text me if you have any problems or weird reactions to the weed I’ll be there right away.” He smiled and gave me a hug before I left.
I got back to the booth and took over my shift again and within five minutes of being there Jon showed up.
“Jon don’t you think I’m sick of you by now? I mean I didn’t even reply to your text couldn’t you just assume I don’t want to talk to you and just lay off for awhile?”
“Are you serious right now? You’re really going to get mad at me because I want Ollie Sykes to stay away from my girlfriend. I am definitely not going to say sorry.”
“Maybe we shouldn’t have gotten back together.” I said
“You are not going to break up with me.” His face turned red with fury in his eyes.
“I-I-I won’t okay?”I said my voice full of fear I wasn’t sure if it was right for someone to be afraid of their own boyfriend but I definitely was.
“Good I’ll see you later.” He kissed my cheek and left like nothing just happened. I knew my life was now going to be living for him again and I couldn’t remember why I missed him but I knew if I broke up with him it would come back to haunt me and I wasn’t willing to risk being haunted even if I would be happy if I wasn’t with him.