Glide With The Breeze

Angie stared at the floor in front of her with wide eyes. "You and Alex, pregnant," she said, piecing together the words that had just come out of Cassie's mouth. Slowly her eyes lifted from the floor to her friend. "Pregnant," she said again and Cassie nodded, "Expecting. With child. Bun in the oven," she said, growing more excited with each phrase she came up with to describe her friend's condition. "Knocked up," she paused for a moment, "With the spawn of Alex."

Cassie laughed and took the ultrasound picture that Alex had set down on the counter next to him and cautiously approached her friend. Angie took the picture from her and looked at it. Rian moved behind her so he could see it as well.

A smile overtook her face. "Oh my God, Cassie!" she exclaimed, jumping out of the chair. She nearly hit Rian in the face as she threw her arms around her best friend. "You're pregnant! I'm going to be an aunt!"

Cassie giggled and returned the embrace. "Yes. Yes, on all counts," she said and looked at Rian. "And you're going to be an uncle." Rian was smiling at her and to anyone else it would have seemed as though he was as excited as the rest of them were. But she could see that there was something else there.

Cassie let go Angie and took a couple steps toward Rian. "Please tell me you're happy for me," she said quietly when he pulled her into a hug.

"Of course I'm happy for you," he replied just as quietly.

"But...?" she asked.

He shook his head. "Nothing. It's stupid," he said. "Congratulations."

Cassie let out a quiet sigh and pulled out of his hug. She grabbed his arm and led him out of the kitchen without a word so they could talk. Just the two of them.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

Rian shook his head. "It's nothing. Really. Don't worry about it, Cass," he said. "It's stupid."

"It's not stupid," she said, a concerned look spreading across her face. "Tell me what's going on," she pressed.

He sighed. "It's just that I feel kind of like," he paused, "This baby is a great thing," he said. "I really am happy for you. But it's going to change everything. Our friendship is going to change. Alex and the baby are going to be the most important things in your life, which they should be." He shrugged and Cassie waited patiently for him to continue. "And, I don't know, I'm just afraid that," he sighed again and left the end of his thought hanging. "I'm just being selfish."

"You're not being selfish," Cassie said, shaking her head. "Yes, things will change and Alex and the baby will be very important in my life, based solely on the fact that we will be a family and Alex and I will be raising a child. But you're important in a different way, Ri. I mean, we didn't see each other for how many years and we just picked up like we'd only been apart for a few days. You've always been there, and you're a huge part of why I was able to become the person I am. And nothing, not Alex, not this baby, is going to change that," she said. "I promise."

Rian nodded. "Alright," he said. "And I really am happy for you, even if it didn't seem like it. I know this is something you've wanted for a long time and you've got a really good guy who didn't even know this was something he wanted until he met you. It's really exciting."

"It is really exciting," she replied. "Wait a second, did you just say that Alex is a really good guy?" she asked as a huge smile spread across her face.

"Yes," Rian said with a chuckle. "I've never thought Alex was a bad guy. I just thought that his intentions were less than honest. But I was wrong. And I can admit that."

"It only took you a year and a half to do so," Cassie said and gave her friend a little push.

Rian laughed and walked back toward the kitchen while shaking his head. Cassie followed behind him, a giant, genuine smile plastered across her face. Even if she had tried, her happiness at that moment could not be contained.

"Everything alright?" Alex asked when the two were back in the kitchen.

Cassie nodded. "Everything is wonderful," she said.

"You know," Rian said, "This really explains a lot."

"It does," Angie agreed. "Like the decaf coffee," she said, "And leaving the room when Alex called."

Alex raised an eyebrow. "You had decaf coffee?" he asked and Cassie nodded. The look on her face said she had no idea why it was as big of a deal as everyone was making it out to be. "Oh, come on. Anyone who has spent five minutes talking to you has heard about your love of, as you say, 'real coffee' and your disdain for all things decaffeinated."

"I am not the coffee snob everyone makes me out to be," Cassie exclaimed defensively. She looked at the faces of each of the people in the room and they were all trying to hide expressions that said they felt otherwise. Her gaze stopped on Rian and she made a face. "Oh, you too? I thought you were on my side," she said with a bit of a pout.

"Look, I'm just saying. I like Starbucks and you call it roasted dirt," he said.

"That's because it is," she said.

Angie laughed. "See, right there," she said, pointing as if the words that had come from Cassie's mouth were tangible objects. "You, my friend, are a huge, huge coffee snob.

The four spent the rest of the afternoon talking and laughing. Rian and Alex had a couple beers while the girls both stuck to water. They made stupid jokes and discussed ridiculous things that happened on tour while Angie and Cassie made dinner. When they were done eating, the boys cleaned the kitchen and they all moved into the living room to sit in front of the TV, though no one paid much attention to it since they were all still conversing.

It was a little after nine when Cassie started yawning but it was nearly an hour before there was a break in conversation. At that time, Rian looked at Angie and she nodded.

"Well, I think we're going to go," he said. "You seem tired, Cass."

Cassie quickly shook her head. "No, I'm fine. This is fun, all of us just sitting around talking. It seems like we never get to do this anymore," she said. Her argument was followed by another yawn.

"It is fun," he agreed. "But you've been yawning for almost an hour and I don't want to keep you up if you need to sleep. And besides, I'm sure Alex wants some alone time with you," he said.

"Fine," she said, giving in far too easily for her usual nature.

Rian walked over to her and leaned down to give her a hug. "Congratulations again, Sissy," he whispered in her ear.

"Thank you," she said quietly. He stood up straight and he and Angie headed for the door. "Bye. Love you guys," she called as they were on their way out.

She and Alex sat in silence for a few minutes. It didn't take long at all for her to shift and lean into him. His arm draped around her waist and his hand rested against the curve of her hip.

"I love you," he said in a way that honest and didn't need to be qualified with a response of 'I love you, too.'

They both stared at the TV but neither was watching it. What was on the screen didn't matter. It was there for background noise that was being tuned out, for visual stimulation that neither was interested in. They were two people in their own world that didn't involve mindless distractions. There was so much to discuss and yet so little to actually be said.

"What did you talk to my doctor about earlier?" Cassie asked.

Alex hesitated before giving a simple answer and she pretended not to notice. "Sex," he said.

"You propositioned my doctor?" she joked, trying to lighten the sudden heavy burden the word seemed to put on him.

"What?" he asked, but her attempt seemed to work. "No, I didn't proposition your doctor," he said with a laugh. "I was asking her if it was was safe because, you know, this is kind of new territory for me."

Cassie nodded against his shoulder. "And what did she say?" she asked, even though she was fairly certain she knew.

"She said it's safe, but that you and I should discuss it because every woman, and even every pregnancy is different and some experience a decrease in sexual desire," he said.

"Okay," she said. "So...?"

"So," Alex repeated. She tipped her head back and looked at him expectantly. He let out a quiet sigh. "Are you really going to make me ask?" he said.

Cassie nodded again and took note of his hesitation once again. "Come on, you've never had a problem talking about sex before. What's so different about this time?" she asked.

"I don't want it sound like I'm begging you for sex," he stated rather simply.

She sat up and his arm fell from around her as she turned to face him. "You're not begging me for sex, so it's not going to sound like that," she said. "So pretend like you're inquiring about my day and just ask me."

"Alright," he said, but he hesitated again for just a moment. Under normal circumstances, it would be a simple question, but it felt very loaded at that moment. "How are you feeling about sex?" he asked.

"I feel good about it," she said. "There has always been a very sexual component to our relationship and, while I can't speak for the entire pregnancy, I can tell you that for now, that isn't going to change. I will keep this line of communication open and we'll work through whatever bumps we may hit along the way. Okay?" she said and he nodded. "And you would have known the answer to this last night, without having to ask, if you'd woken me up when you got home," she said, jokingly giving him a hard time.

He pouted. "Will you let that go already," he said.

Cassie giggled quietly at his mock exasperation. "That's depends," she said. He looked at her and waited for her to continue. "Will you come upstairs with me?" she asked.