Precaution

“So what are you going to do?” Kat said, handing me a chart for an abdominal aneurysm. I just shrugged. Sidney didn’t want anything to do with me anymore and I had a career to take care of.

“I’m ending it.” I said, not looking up from the chart. “You know what they do with pregnant interns. I’m too talented to go to derm or obstetrics, I’m not wasting this opportunity.” I finished, finally looking up at Kat.

“Are you going to tell him?” She asked, leaning against the nurses station counter. I shook my head. What was the point?

“No. Once I take care of this, Sidney won’t even be a passing thought. “ I grabbed the chart and Kat followed me down the hallway, the two of us passing through the pediatric wing and to the pit. I didn’t look at him when we passed Pascal’s room (who’s wife was still pregnant and clearly annoyed at that.), I passed on by without saying a word or exchanging a glance. I was exhausted by this, I literally had nothing more to give him.

When we arrived outside of the ER, I felt at ease. The sirens and rush of medicine, the meadly of voices—that was familiar territory. Kat tied my yellow surgical apron quickly and I snapped on a pair of gloves.

“What do we have?” Kat yelled, helping the paramedics take down the stretched from the ambulance.

“42 year old female, car accident victim. Massive lacerations across the body as well as cranial damage from colliding with a traffic sign—metal still intact from the scene. Third degree burns across her limbs, two large boar needles given at the scene. She’s had two hypotensive episodes in the low seventies.” The paramedic shouted as I stood to the side. I knitted my brows together in confusion.

“Metal still intact? Where?” I asked and then they rolled the stretcher down and I saw what they were referring to. Impaling her body was the metal pole from a stop sign.

“Holy shit.” I said, and the rest of the interns nodded in agreement.

When we rushed her in Savard and Novikova were already standing off to the side, snapping on their gloves and discussing what needed to be done. Kat and I joined up with them, listening intently. They turned to us.

“What do we need to look out for before removing the metal?” They asked us, making this woman’s excruciating situation a learning opportunity.

“Infection and us worsening the damage by removal.” I answered and Savard smiled towards Kat, who looked a little irked by my answer.

“Very good, Dr.Anderson.” He said before walking into the room. “Swenn, go book an OR. Anderson, give me another round of morphine.” I ran over to the drawer, grabbing the morphine and loading up my syringe with it before injecting it into her IV.

“Mrs. Henderson?” I asked, looking at the patient who had woken up after the initial shock from her injuries. “Mrs.Henderson, I’m Dr.Anderson. You’re at Allegheny General. You were in an accident, we’re trying to help you.” I said just as Connors walked in, giving me a quick grin before settling down to treat her burns.

---

The surgery was a success, with the patient stable and recovering in the ICU. She had catastrophic injuries, but the surgery went as smoothly as an appendectomy. Katarina and I stood in the scrub room, taking off our surgical covers and scrubbing out.

“Car accidents happen.” I said absent mindedly, thinking about my own accident and Derek. Kat looked at me, a confused expression on her face.

“Uh yeah. They do.” She said, shaking the water off the hands. I turned to her.

“No, what I mean is… car accidents happen and you can’t just sit around avoiding people because…well, because car accidents happen and they could die or go into a coma or get impaled by a stop sign and then you’re just left there.” I turned off the faucet and looked at her, exhaling slowly.

“Are you talking about Derek?” Kat asked and I nodded, staring out into the OR.

“I’m an avoider. I avoid. I avoided telling Sidney I loved him, I avoided my parents, I avoid everything. I’m just ..i’m going to stop.”

I had decided to start today, to stop avoiding the obstacles in life and just cross over them. Mrs. Hendersons surgery put everything into perspective and I had decided to see Derek.

Of course, I had waited to do so until he was about to be discharged because after all, baby steps had to be taken to this new me. I stood in front of Derek’s room and I leaned against his doorframe, hugging the patient chart against my chest with one arm. “Hey.” I said and he stopped packing his suitcase, his eyes glancing up at me.

“Hey.” He replied back and we just stood there for a second, completely still.

He broke the silence first.

“Violet, look I—“ he began but I stopped him, walking into the room and taking a seat on the hospital bed. He sank down next to me, watching my expression intently.

“No, don’t. I shouldn’t have said those things, Derek. I didn’t mean them. I was just angry and hurt.” I shook my head, turning to face him. “I just—I’m sorry.” I said and he grabbed my hand.

“Violet, I love you. I haven’t stopped loving you. I know it’s not an excuse for what I did, but it wasn’t me feeling unready to marry you that got in the way before. I felt second to surgery and I knew it would only get worse when you started your internship. But now I don’t care. I don’t want to lose you, not again. “ He said, reaching into the pocket of his jeans and pulling out a box. It opened and I was taken aback.

Inside sat a diamond, enormous and seemingly too ostentatious to be real. I looked up from the ring to Derek, feeling myself lose my breath again.

“Violet, will you marry me?” He asked, his hand still covering mine. I looked from him to the ring and back, feeling my breathing get shakier by the second.

Sidney didn’t want me anymore, he couldn’t even look at me.

I nodded my head.

“Yes.”