Precaution

I dropped the keys in the small glass dish by the door, moving mechanically to the couch as I peeled off my shoes and sweater. I flipped on the television, breezing by the sports channels and the infomercials. Sidney’s face came up mid-skim and I paused on the channel, smiling to myself as I listened to his interview.

“I didn’t see you at the hospital today. Where were you?” I heard Derek ask behind me and I jumped before standing up from the couch to walk around and greet him. I embraced him and he matched my hold limply. His touch felt cold and uncertain and I felt his reluctance. I was tired of this, of the hot and cold between him and I. There was so much passion and love from him when this started and now it had taken a sudden drop.

I pulled away from Derek, watching him for a moment. “I don’t get it. Did I do something?” I asked and he just looked at me blankly, his stare indifferent and hard. This was the first time in days that he’s managed to look me in the eyes and when he finally did, it was forbidding and unfeeling.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” he asked and I wasn’t exactly sure what to say. I wasn’t that girl that was annoyingly clingy and paranoid and the last thing I wanted was to sound like that. But something was wrong and from Sidney’s expression earlier, I could tell he had some sort of opinion on the matter too.

“You’re never around and when you are, you won’t—“ I stopped, trying to harden my expression so that I wouldn’t look as vulnerable as I felt. “You won’t look at me.” I finally said and his eyes turned from the floor back to me. He opened his mouth to speak, but his phone rang on the endtable next to the couch. I looked at it and with one defiant step, I grabbed the iphone. He followed me quickly, coming up right behind me to try to snatch the cellphone away, but I grasped the cold device first.

A woman’s name lit up the screen and I ran my thumb across the touch screen to answer. Derek grabbed my arm roughly and I tried to yank it away, pulling the phone up to my ear. One of his hands grabbed my wrist and the other tried to grab the phone but her smooth, melodious voice caught my ear.

“Baby?” It asked and I froze and his hand, in an attempt to get the cellphone, rammed into my face.

In my state of shock and panic, of pain and fright, I dropped the cellphone and threw my hands up to cover my eye. He took the phone and stepped forward to me, confronting me as if though this whole thing was my fault.

My eye and chest were both throbbing as I clutched my face, now wet from the tears that fell. I tried my best to stop crying, using my other hand to wipe away the mascara and eyeliner mess that was traveling down my cheek. I knew it was an accident, that he hadn’t meant to hit me. But the look on his face gave up no apology. Instead, his voice escalated.

“Where the hell do you get off answering my phone?” he hissed bitterly, bending down to yell. I meant to answer, but my mouth wouldn’t create words. My mind was too busy, rushing at a million miles per hour as I tried to repiece the events. A part of me felt like this was my fault, a part of me wanted to apologize to him because I knew that I wasn’t one hundred percent faithful in my feelings toward him. I still loved Sidney and I wasn’t sure that could ever change, and along with my long days and nights at the hospital, I really wasn’t helping things.

I cradled my face in my hands, exhaling loudly. I couldn’t blame him, not when I was just as much of a monster as he was. I never cheated on him physically and I still wasn’t even a hundred percent sure he had done so either. But everything I had was fully invested in Sidney. It would be a cruel lie to pretend otherwise.

I breathed deeply again before hearing the doorbell ring. I looked up at Derek and he went to go answer the door. I stood in the living room, waiting to see who it was. Moving my head, I caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror. I looked like hell. My face was red from the crying and my blue eyes were a bright aqua, the whites bloodshot. They were framed by a fresh, now purple bruise that glistened from the moisture and a melted trail of black eye makeup stained my skin.

I heard the familiar French accent of Kris at the door and instinctually turned around. He was looking through the door for me as he addressed Derek and I could see Max and Jordan stretch their heads up over his. I caught his eye and my face immediately sank down in regret.
The three of them pushed their way through Derek, causing him to go “What the fuck?” and Jordan shoved him harshly.

“What the fuck?” Kris echoed, walking over to me. “You’re really asking that? How about what the fuck happened to her?” he asked harshly and Derek tried to move over to Kris, but Jordan gave him another shove. Derek pushed back and Kris’s head snapped up.

I was glad at first because I knew they had enough sense not to fight him for my sake, but when someone from their team got pushed, it was a whole other story. I had seen it in games, in clubs and bars; they were this massive, indestructible family that protected one another. You couldn’t take on one Pittsburgh Penguin without taking on the whole team.

Kris moved away from me and Max followed him to Derek and Jordan. “Don’t fucking touch him and don’t fucking touch her.” He said and raised his hand, but I grabbed it quickly. I put both my hands on Kris’s shoulders, but Derek shoved me by the waist to pull me aside. It wasn’t hard, but it did the job and had the result of throwing gasoline on an open flame. Kris tried to hit him, but I moved back in front of Kris.

“Stop, Kris.” I yelled, trying to stop Max’s hands at the same time. “Stop, it was an accident. I swear.” I said and it calmed them down. I had my hands on Kris’s shoulders and tried to move him back. With every step, he didn’t take his eyes off of Derek. “What are you guys even doing here?” I asked, brushing my hair away from my face. They all stared down at me and I could feel them looking at my bruise. Max picked up my arm lightly, observing my wrist and I tugged it away.

“We were getting Lucy’s stuff but you need to go get your things too. You’re not staying here.” Kris said and Derek moved closer to confront him.

“Who the fuck are you? This is my fiancée.” He said and Jordan moved to meet him. Kris motioned for me to go grab my things and I went into my bedroom reluctantly.

I ignored the yelling in the living room, stuffing the Louis Vuitton tote Derek had gotten me as what I now know to be a guilt present. I threw in clothes, my cellphone and pager and slid my makeup and bathroom items off of the granite counters. As far as I could tell, nobody had hit each other. Which was pretty good. I grabbed two of Lucy’s bags too to take to Marc’s house for her.

“Violet, stop.” I heard Derek say as I moved out of the hallway and next to the guys. I shrugged at Derek and shook my head lightly.

“Look, I’m not blaming you. But I think time apart would be good.” I said and moved towards the door. Derek shot forward and grabbed my wrist again, causing Max to give him a shove so I could pull it free. Kris took Lucy’s bags from me and I walked out the door. I turned around to wait for the rest of the guys and I could make out Jordan’s ridiculously calm smile before his wrist flew out and hit Derek square in the face. He fell back against the floor and Jordan walked out, a smile on his face.

Derek was now the one on the floor, clutching his face. “You’ll be hearing from my lawyers, Staal.” He yelled and I stopped and turned around. Kris tried to pull back my shoulder but I guess I was just as blindly loyal to them as they were to each other.

“You won’t be doing that, Derek. Because if you make a single phone call, we’re done. “ I looked at him and he nodded. “Not only that, but I’ll send a detailed photograph of my face to every Canadian and American media outlet. Accident or not, nobody likes to see a rich asshole push around a girl.” I snapped and shut the door, leaving him on the floor in a state of confusion.