Precaution

I sat in the chair for a few more minutes, not really excited about going back home to confront Derek. So I just sat, staring off into the fire with his ring in my hand.

I was half tempted to just throw it in the flames, throw it into the woods—just get it away from me. But I just held it instead, watching the canary diamond glow in the darkness.

Kris put his hand on my arm, giving me a reassuring pat. “You don’t have to do it tonight.” He said and I turned to look at him. Liz nodded in agreement, the two of them right. I didn’t have to do this tonight but I wanted to. I wanted to move on, I needed to get on with my life. I felt like I was trapped in a cage, unable to move forward.

“I know.” I said, smiling back at him. It was so strange how relationships get built. I never expected to be friends with Kris, never expected to look to him for guidance and reassurance. But I did and he hadn’t let me down yet. “I just—I want to do this. I have to move on with my life.” I replied and he nodded.

“Do you want me to go with you?” he asked and I just shook my head. I didn’t want this to escalate into something else and while I had to admit I was nervous about what Derek would do, I trusted him enough to handle this in a civil manner. I trusted him not to hurt me.

“No, it’s okay. “ I stood up, tucking my phone in my pocket. “I’ll be fine. “ I walked over to Kris and Liz and gave the both of them a goodbye hug before moving over to Marc and Lucy.

“Call us as soon as he leaves.” Marc said lightly as I hugged him goodbye and Lucy nodded in agreement, her head moving too vigorously from all the alcohol. I gave him a nod of my own before pulling away.

“And if he lays a hand on you—“ Jordan began, a little drunk himself.

“—I’ll come over and kick his ass. “ Deryk Engellend finished for Jordan with a smile, the two of them exchanging high fives.

“Okay. I’ll talk to you all later. You two—“ I pointed at Jordan and Lucy. “—don’t do anything stupid.” The two of them just stared back at me, all wide eyed and innocent. I didn’t buy it for a second.

“Seriously, I’m not bailing anybody out of jail tonight.” I added and Lucy just laughed into her cup, taking another drink.

“Bye guys” I said with a wave turning to clean.

“Go get ‘em, tiger.” I heard Max say as I turned away, slapping my ass in the process.

---

Marc lived about fifteen to twenty minutes away from downtown Pittsburgh, but I could have sworn the drive back to my apartment was at least seven hours long.

I was tense and nervous, unsure of what to do when I walked through the door. My hands shook as I walked up the stairs, my breathing grew shaky. I knew I had no reason to be afraid of Derek, but for some reason after that hit, I couldn’t help but shy away from him whenever he got too close.

I slipped the key in the lock and took a deep breath, turning it and pushing the door open. I saw Derek sitting at the kitchen table, his hands pulled to his head, looking down at the table.

He looked up at me as soon as I came in, frowning. I just set my keys back in the bowl, shutting the door behind me.

“Hey.” I said, not really sure how else to start off the conversation. I moved to the table slowly. “We need to talk.” It was the old, cliché breakup starter but I didn’t know what else to do. We did in fact need to talk, we needed to talk about a lot of things.

I took a seat from him opposite of the table, setting the engagement ring in the middle.

“I can’t do this anymore.” I said and he looked at me, shaking his head.

“No, Violet. It’s alright. I forgive you, you just made a mistake. Believe me, I know all about those.” He replied and I just smiled back.

“Sidney isn’t a mistake. He never was. “ I said and Derek exhaled slowly.

“This can’t be over like this. I love you. This is years and years of a relationship. It can’t be over for somebody else.”

“I love you too, Derek.” I said, smiling at him gently. “But I’m not in love with you. And can you honestly say you are in love with me? We’re not compatible. You need somebody that’ll put you first and I can’t do that.”

“No, what I need is you.” He replied but I shook my head.

“I never put you first. It was always the hospital and it will always be the hospital. And Sidney? I love him. I’m so in love with him that it drives me crazy, so much so that I can’t be with anybody else. I love him. What I have with him is perfect and Derek, we were always so far from perfect.” I shook my head again, sinking back in my chair.

“I just can’t be with somebody who isn’t in love with me and I don’t think you can either.” I finished and he nodded.

“Keep the ring.” He said and I stared at him, unsure of what to say. “I’ll get my things out tomorrow.” He added and got up, taking his keys and phone and walking out of the door and leaving me breathing a sigh of relief in my chair.

And for the first time in months, I felt like things were finally beginning to go my way.