Living Like You're Dead

"What the hell. Daryl really was a git if he had the guts to do that." Addie was mad. She had thrown herself after him like a dog after a steak, and he rejected her. What was she thinking?

"Maybe I just am lonely." she thought. "I miss Alex... I miss sleeping next to someone."

Addie felt hurt from the rejection. It stung her heart like a bee. And even though she did care for Daryl she ignored it, and told herself it was nothing. It was just an infatuation.
____________________________________________________________________

Daryl's hands shook. He had left her crying... a beautiful girl held him, kissed him, and he made her cry? What was wrong with him. He half contemplated turning back and ravishing her body right there in the pond wile saying sorry a million times. But he hated himself for it. She was too good for him.

Merle always told him, "If she looks too good, forget her - she'll just waste yer time."

Daryl grabbed a beer from the fridge. Running on generator power didn't keep the fridge very cold. He shut the door, then opened it again only to grab three more beers, and then walked into the back yard. Rick was playing with his son Carl, they were tossing a baseball back and forth.
"Its just like when we did it back at home!" Carl exclaimed. Daryl wished he was back home. He didn't really miss dragging Merle home after a night at the bar, he didn't miss the shitty apartment they shared. He didn't miss having empty shelves. He missed just Merle. Even if he was a brainless bastard. He decided to climb a tree. There Addie probably wouldn't find him. He could watch for geeks and drink whatever it was he felt for the damn girl away.
____________________________________________________________________

Shane watched Daryl walk out of the trees, his hair was wet... it seemed he'd fallen into a river or something. Then only a few minutes later Addie walked out looking the same, except for being cleaner. "Had they been together?" Shane asked himself. What would he see in that trailer filth anyway? His brother was a handful and so was Daryl - she shouldn't be hanging around such filth.

"Hey toots'" Shane said.

"Bonjour." she said back, she seemed to still be crying but she tried to avoid Shane's gaze.

"Hey hey hey now... what in the world are you doin' crying?" Shane asked her. "Did that Daryl hurt you?" Addie paused for a moment... he had hurt her, well not physically. Shane seemed to question her silence.

"I'll kill that no good sumbitch!" he said enraged, Addie grabbed his arm.

"NO. He did not hurt me." she yelled. She wanted to make sure, Shane understood her - she didn't want Daryl hurt.

"Well why ya crying then?" Addie didn't know what to say - she didn't want him going after Daryl.

"My mother." she said. "She just gave me this fear of water when I was little. I slipped into the river and Daryl pulled me out. No problem."

"Oh. Alright then, I had a mind to kick his ass there for a minute."

"I could tell." she said.

"Well a beautiful girl like you shouldn't be cryin' did you take your bath?"

"Uhm. Sorta, I let Lori use the water first. Figured it would clean us both."

"Well alright then. Can I show you something?"

"I - uhm I guess." she said. Shane grabbed her hand and lead her up the steps and into the house. Addie couldn't see Daryl anywhere but Shane lead her through the house and to his room. It wasn't large, but it looked like a basic bedroom. He went over to the desk drawer and pulled out some old pieces of paper. No, not paper, photos.

"Here, she looks like you." he said pointing. And sure enough Addie was looking at a woman with long black hair and red stained lips - she had never seen a picture of her mother, now she knew that her dream had been real.

"My mother." Addie said.



"I thought it might be, after you mentioned her it reminded me of these photos I found."

Addie sat on the end of Shane's bed looking at the photos of her, this must've been her room. There were several pictures of her just about the property, there was only one where she held a small baby in her arms - and that photo was different than all the rest. Her hair was messy, and her make-up wasn't done, she seemed sad in that photo despite the fact that she had Adeline in her arms.

"That must be you." Shane said with a smile. Addie's eyes only welled with more tears. "Oh Darlin' shh." Shane put his arm around her and stroked her wet hair with his hand. She didn't like the way he smelled. Like bad aftershave and sweat. His hand touched her knee. Her shorts were oh so short... and Shane wanted to take advantage of that.

"I - I have to go." she said. Addie took the photos with her and walked back to her room. Shane was left alone on his bed, with rage building inside him.
________________________________________________________________

She threw the photos into the nightstand by her bed. What had her mother done to her. She heard horror stories of mothers drowning their children, feeding them poison, but she never knew she had been one of them. Alderic had told her her mother died in childbirth - she never knew she was alive... she never knew her mother had raised her. She looked just like her mother - same dark hair, same pale skin. She had never known her father but he must be responsible for the curl in her hair. That was the only value they shared, other than her hair Adeline was an exact copy of her mother.

First the world goes to shit, then her family, now her childhood?