Victim

“Brian, I’m home,” Michelle called out, nudging the front door open with her hip, a bag of groceries balanced on the other. She flipped on the light with her free hand, walking towards the kitchen. She listened for any sound of him coming down the stairs, but could hear none. She put away what was intended to become their dinner for tonight, tossing the paper sack in the trash can as she walked out of the kitchen and into the living room.

She called his name again, crossing the room to the stairs. Her eyes landed on a folded piece of paper lying on an end table by the stairs. She grabbed it, unfolding it as she walked slowly up the stairs. She had read it two or three times by the time she reached the top of the stairs, when it finally began to sink in. She dropped it, almost sprinting to their bedroom, hoping it was just a joke, and he’d be in there waiting for her.

She shoved open the door, only to find it as silent and empty as the rest of the house. She crossed over to the bed, and sat down on the edge, looking at his messy, unmade side of it. The tears began to slide down her cheeks, slowly at first, then faster until she was sobbing with her head buried into her legs that were pulled up to her chest with her arms wrapped around them. The realization finally hit her. He was gone. He’d had some secret life she’d never known about. Everything about their life together was probably a lie. Where was he now? Telling some blonde model half her size that he loved her? That made it hurt even more, but she managed to force herself to grab the home phone off the nightstand and call her sister, Val, who answered on the third ring.

“Hello?”

“Val?”

“Michelle? Are you crying? What happened?”

“Val…it’s Brian. He…he…he left,” she choked out, still sobbing.

“It’s okay; I’ll be there in a few minutes. Do want me to bring Matt?”

“I don’t really care whether he comes right now or not, Val.”

“Okay. See you in a few,” Val answered, ending the call, but not before Michelle heard her yelling for Matt.

- - - - - - - - - -

Michelle set the phone down without bothering to put it back on the receiver and lay down on the bed in the fetal position, staring at Brian’s pillow. She was still lying like that twenty minutes later when the front door banged open and she heard Val’s voice yelling her name. It reminded her of what she’d been doing less than an hour ago, before half of her world came crashing down around her.

She heard heavy footsteps coming upstairs and glanced over at the doorway as Matt appeared in it. He left and yelled for his wife before returning and sitting awkwardly on the edge of the bed. He looked like he didn’t know whether to say something consoling or lean over and pat her comfortingly on the ankle.

Val could be heard running up the stairs, and appeared behind him in the doorway. She half-pushed Matt off the bed, telling him to go call the other guys and pulled her sister into a hug. Michelle buried her face into her sister’s hair, beginning a new wave of sobbing. She and her sister were always there for each other, which was something she was especially thankful for now that Brian wasn’t there.

“Shh, it’s okay. Let’s go downstairs. The other guys will be here soon,” Val said, dragging her sister to her feet. Some of the last people she wanted to see were Brian’s closest friends, but she didn’t want to fight Val and allowed herself to be dragged downstairs.

Val led her to the couch before going back to the stairs. She returned with the piece of paper; her brown eyes scanning it thoroughly several times. She set Brian’s note on the coffee table and wrapped her arms around her sister once again. Val made every attempt she could at consoling her sister, but nothing worked. She didn’t know what you were supposed to say in a situation like this, and resolved to stroking her sister’s hair comfortingly.

A few minutes later, Jimmy came sprinting in, sliding as he approached the carpet and almost knocked Val off the couch in his rush to get to Michelle. Val moved out of his way as much as she could, for she knew Jimmy, Brian, and Michelle had all been extremely close. Johnny and Matt followed him more slowly, with Zack coming in a few minutes behind them.

The group hug started on the couch and ended up in the middle of the living room floor after several people began to slide off of the couch. Michelle was kept in the middle by the rest of them, even though she was definitely not the only one hurting right now. Gena, Lacey, and Leanna showed up an hour later, having received messages from their corresponding boyfriends, and joined the huddle on the floor. At some point, one of them left the group and to make something that qualified as dinner, but none of them took more than two or three bites, if any.

Four hours later, the circle slowly grew smaller as some left to return to their houses. Eventually only Michelle, Val, Matt, and Jimmy were left. After another hour of sitting on the floor, talking quietly about Brian from time to time, Val managed to convince Matt and Jimmy to leave together, allowing her to be alone with her sister.

She led Michelle up the stairs to her bedroom and tucked her in like she’d done a few times before when they were younger. She sat in the desk chair on the far side of the room, waiting for Michelle to fall asleep. The last thing Michelle remembered from that night was her sister slowly opening the door, slipping through the crack, and closing it again, leaving her completely alone. The bed had felt much too large for one person when Brian was on tour, but now it felt like it was two times the size it usually was, knowing there was a good chance he would never sleep there again.