I Forgot to Remember to Forget
I forgot to remember to forget chapter 12
Chapter 12
At the airport I was nervous to see him mom what did she think about me saying no to her sons proposal. She used to already think of me as a daughter but what about now?
“don’t worry she knows everything and she still loves you.”
“how did you-
He cut me off “3 years. I know you pretty well after 3 years of being together.”
“yeah I guess you do” I said elbowing him trying to lighten up the mood.
When his mom came into sight a smile instantly came across my face and I ran to hug her.
“Mariah oh I am so happy to see you. I didn’t expect you to be here honey.” Passionaye said
“yeah I know but when Michael said you were coming I jumped at the chance to see you. I miss you.”
“oh I miss you too honey. Come on lets walk and talk at the same time, Michael honey can you get my bags?”
Michael hugged his mom and said ‘anything for you mom”
When we came outside the airport tyga went to get the car and I felt really nervous to be alone with his mom knowing that she was bound to ask about what happened and why I said no at some point.
“so honey how are you?”
“I’m fine”
“I know you Mariah you cant lie to me so tell me how are you really?”
“okay fair enough. (I smiled) My heart is broken and I feel like I’m dying inside. I love your son and I would do anything to be with him again but I don’t think it will ever happen and that kills me. Sometimes it makes me wish I could relive that night and change my answer but I know that that’s not the right thing either.”
“honey you’ll be okay. Time heals all wounds.“ she said hugging me “I heard you and shad are together now. Is that true?”
“yeah we’re together almost 6 months now.”
“do you love him?”
“I do but I’m not in love with him and I know it’ll never be anything like it was with Michael and I hate that I keep comparing them to each other.”
“that’s because what you had with my son was the type of love that comes once in a life time its true love and it’ll never end even when it has.”
I nodded as I saw tyga coming with the car and the I looked back at passionaye who said “he still loves you, you know.” before I could say anything he was getting out the car to open the door for us.
They dropped me off at my house so they could spend some quality time together and I needed to get home before shad did. I went into the house and made some chili and cornbread then waited for shad to come home. He was supposed to be done at the set at 5. I went up stairs and got ready before I knew it shad was behind me. He wrapped his arms around me. “hey beautiful”
“mmm I missed you today.” I commented as he kissed my neck. I turned around in his arms “come on” I said taking his hand and dragging him down stairs. “Here” I said handing him a bowl of chili and cornbread. “awe thanks babe” he kissed my cheek lightly. “your welcome” I smiled back “so what movie are we gonna watch?” he asked “you pick” “okay okay let me see here” he perused through the movies on the book self “here we go” he said putting in my favorite movies love and basketball.
We watched the movie but before it could even end I was asleep and I guess he was too because we woke up in each others arms on the couch with the main menu playing on the tv.
I turned over to look at the clock it was almost 10. “morning babe” shad smiled at me “morning” I said pecking him on the lips for him to kiss me back harder and pull me up on top of him just as the door bell rang. “ugh” he sighed “I’ll get it.” I said getting up and walking toward the front door.
“morning sleepy head” passionaye said as the door sprang open.
“morning” I said as I saw passionaye and Michael on my front door step with bags in their hands. It felt weird to see tyga this early he looked like he just woke up as well.
they walked passed me heading toward the kitchen and tyga whispered “nice legs” as he brushed past making me blush.
I headed over toward passionaye “so what’s in the bags?” I questioned
“breakfast” she responded with a smile on her face.“do you need any help?” I asked as tyga walked over to shad who was now sitting up turning the xbox on.
“no sweetie you just go get ready it should be done when you are”
“okay” I nodded heading over to shad so I could drag him upstairs’ and so we could finish what we started on the couch as well
I started the shower and went to get in when shad came up behind me and I could feel he was naked “can I join you” he whispered against my collar bone. I didn’t answer instead I just dragged him into the shower along with me.
MEANWHILE DOWNSTAIRS
TYGAS POV
“honey what’s wrong?” I heard my mom ask breaking my concentration.
“nothing” I shot out quickly.
“well I beg to differ. Lets talk about it it’s the only way your going feel any better.”
“mom its just…..its hard.”
“I know baby” she walked over hugging me.
“no you don’t know. I made a mistake when I walked out. It was stupid I knew she wasn’t ready but I asked her anyways. Then she said no like I knew she would and I made another mistake by walking out and ending the best thing I’ve even had.” I said tears feeling my eyes. I never cried but there was just something about Mariah that made all my emotions surface and everything I feel is a hundred times greater than it should be.
Mom hugged me again then said “she still loves you. Mariah still loves you I can tell by just one look at that girl. Now you both need to just find a way back.”
MARIAHS POV
After the hot and steamy experience in the shower shad and I helped each other get dressed and made our way back downstairs to have this wonderful aroma engulf our noses.
“That smells great” I said as I walked into the kitchen the smell now overwhelming.
“thanks baby” passionaye said as she carried the food over to the table. “alright boys lets eat.” she said toward Michael and shad.
Breakfast was nice we all sat around and talked for hours but then shad had to leave and I could tell he didn’t want to especially since tyga was still gonna be here.
“ill see you later babe.”
“okay” I said kissing him then walking him out to his car. He rolled down the window and said ‘I love you” I reached my head threw the window and kissed him “I love you too” I said as I pulled back. I watched him pull out the driveway before returning to the house but when I turned to go toward the house I saw tyga standing at the door and by the look on his face I could tell that he was hurt.
As I approached the door he opened it for me “tyga” I said turning around to face him but before I got out another word “don’t worry about it riah. Its fine, I get it” he said before walking past me back into the house. Michael played video games and me and his mom went down to my office and just had girl talk. She didn’t mention Michael which I was thankful for at the moment. I could tell that it was hurting her that her son was hurting every time she looked at my way. She decided to go out and buy lunch just some pizzas and bring them back here.
“alright so ima go get the pizza and maybe you can try to get my son away from that game” she said laughing as she walked out the door.
I made my way over to the couch and set down next to Michael “can I play’ he looked over then smiled “yeah” we played one game and the deal was that if I won he had to put the game up. We played madden 11 and I won, I knew I would Michael was never very good at this game. When I scored the final touch down I jumped up and yelled in his face “yeah! I win” and did my little dance then when I turned around he was right in my face and we both took another step closer to each other gazing in each others eyes. “I let you win” he said putting his lips on mine.
They lingered there for a second and then when he realized I wasn’t going to kiss him back he pulled away starring at me. When I looked into his eyes I saw myself and I’m not just talking about my reflection but I really saw myself. Its like my soul was looking back at me screaming this is what you want and most importantly this is what you need.
Tyga went to say something but before he could get it out my lips were pressed against his hard and I even slipped my tongue in. then he picked me up hands on my ass and slammed me into the wall as my hands went around his neck. Both of us broke the kiss laughing and then he carried me up stairs. “I missed you so much I should have never left.” he said I smiled kissing him again but my smile caused the kiss to break. We reached the bedroom door and he walked in slowly laying me gently on the bed then pulling his shirt off. My hands reached up exploring his chest then he raised me up pulling my shirt off. We explored each others bodies just like it was the first time. And right before he entered me he said “I love you” and I knew he meant it I could see it in his eyes.
It wasn’t long until his mom came back so we had to get dressed before she would come up here and see what happened. Michael and I still had a lot to talk about but we weren’t going to let it ruin the moment.
We made our way downstairs hand in hand and neither of us could stop smiling. “what is this?” passionaye questioned. Tyga and I looked at each other but we didn’t have an answer. “you know what never mind I’ma go back to the house Michael you and Mariah obviously need to work some stuff out. I’ll see you later” she said taking some pizza with her.
Tyga and I ate some pizza then watched a movie it was more of a way to buy time than anything. that’s when my phone rang shad it lit up I wasn’t going to answer but then tyga saw who it was and told me to take it.
M: hello
S: hey baby so listen I’m not gonna be able to make it home tonight they’re wanting to do a couple more scenes then I got the video after and an early photo shoot so I’ll just come home tomorrow for lunch. Okay?
M: yeah okay that’s fine. Have fun.
S: okay talk to you later. I love you bye
M: you too bye.
I looked over at ty “so shad wont be home till tomorrow afternoon. You think maybe you’d want to stay the night?”
“yeah if you really want me to.”
I kissed him ‘oh I really want you too.” I laughed climbing in top of him then today’s previous events happened again and again. By this time we were up stairs in bed just cuddling. This was the perfect chance to talk about us so I went for it “so what’s next?” I asked not looking at him.
“well I don’t know about you but I’m tired so I say sleep is next.”
“that’s not what I meant”
“I know” “what do you want to be next?” h asked me raising my head up so that I would be forced to look at him.
“I want us to be together again but I don’t want to hurt shad either.” I said truthfully.
He kissed my cheek then my lips lightly “me too.” he replied “now lets just get some sleep tomorrow is a new day and we can worry about everything then” he pulled me closer kissing my forehead. “I love you” he whispered
‘I love you too.” I said into his chest drifting to sleep.
When I woke up that next morning I was afraid of opening my eyes afraid that everything that happened yesterday was just a dream. Then I felt someone kiss my cheek so I crossed my fingers hoping it was ty. Before fully opening my eyes I kinda peaked threw my eye lashes. “what are you doing?” he laughed and then I knew I could open my eyes because he was here and this was real. “ nothing.” I lied not wanting to explain myself. He leaned over and kissed me “I got to get ready to go” “ what why?” I asked
“shad will be home soon and I think its best I go, unless you want me to stay and we can tell him together.”
“no I think I should do it alone just don’t tell anyone till I tell him okay?”
“okay.”
Tyga got a shower and his phone kept going off while he was on there so I went to shut it off when I opened up his text messages instead. There was dozens of messages from some girl named Farah. I couldn’t help myself so I read them I didn’t really think it was a big deal because tyga and I didn’t keep anything from each other so why start now. The text messages said:
Ty I really need to talk to you
Ty I miss you
Where you at haven’t seen you in a few days just call me when you can
Heard your mom was in town hoping maybe I could meet her
Okay so I know ive been blowing your phone up but I really need to talk to you. Its important so please call me back and so on….
that’s when I saw he had 2 new voicemails so I took a listen. The first one was for her just asking to call back and the second was saying that she hasn’t spoke to him in a week and she cant wait no longer for him to call or text back so she just gonna come on and say what she needs to say “ty I’m pregnant and its your’s” the words burned over and over in my head, then came the tears.
Ty walked out the bathroom and saw that I was crying so he walked over and dropped to his knees laying his head in my lap “what’s wrong baby?” he asked
I looked into his eyes and kissed him holding on with everything that was in me when I let go I looked in his eyes and said “we cant be together.” he looked at me confused so I handed him his phone and told him to look at his texts then listen to his voicemail. He did and he looked back at me and said “this does change things”
“yeah’ I laughed a little even though it wasn’t funny “you need to go call her and tell her that your gonna be there for her and the baby.”
“what about us?” he asked tears coming to his eyes because he already knew the answer
I knew that he needed to hear an answer so I tried my best to give him one “oh baby” we put our foreheads together looking in each others eyes “there is still an us its just that now we really have to be friends. Its just another chapter in our book.” the tears were rolling down both our faces now. “ this wasn’t supposed to be like this. We were supposed to get married and have a baby and be happy together for the rest of our lives.” he said
“I know and I should have said yes. I loved you more than anything and my pride just got in the way and If I could go back and change it would but I cant and we cant and we just have to move forward. Which is why you need to call Farah and to the right thing and take care of her and the baby.”
“your right I know your right but I just got you back and I’m not ready to lose you again”
“your not losing me in fact your never gonna lose me I promise.” I said and he leaned in and kissed me for what would be the last time. Then he got up and walked toward the door but before exiting he turned and said “you’ll always be it for me” I replied back with “I love you too.” with that he left and I was back where I started with him leaving and my heart breaking.
At the airport I was nervous to see him mom what did she think about me saying no to her sons proposal. She used to already think of me as a daughter but what about now?
“don’t worry she knows everything and she still loves you.”
“how did you-
He cut me off “3 years. I know you pretty well after 3 years of being together.”
“yeah I guess you do” I said elbowing him trying to lighten up the mood.
When his mom came into sight a smile instantly came across my face and I ran to hug her.
“Mariah oh I am so happy to see you. I didn’t expect you to be here honey.” Passionaye said
“yeah I know but when Michael said you were coming I jumped at the chance to see you. I miss you.”
“oh I miss you too honey. Come on lets walk and talk at the same time, Michael honey can you get my bags?”
Michael hugged his mom and said ‘anything for you mom”
When we came outside the airport tyga went to get the car and I felt really nervous to be alone with his mom knowing that she was bound to ask about what happened and why I said no at some point.
“so honey how are you?”
“I’m fine”
“I know you Mariah you cant lie to me so tell me how are you really?”
“okay fair enough. (I smiled) My heart is broken and I feel like I’m dying inside. I love your son and I would do anything to be with him again but I don’t think it will ever happen and that kills me. Sometimes it makes me wish I could relive that night and change my answer but I know that that’s not the right thing either.”
“honey you’ll be okay. Time heals all wounds.“ she said hugging me “I heard you and shad are together now. Is that true?”
“yeah we’re together almost 6 months now.”
“do you love him?”
“I do but I’m not in love with him and I know it’ll never be anything like it was with Michael and I hate that I keep comparing them to each other.”
“that’s because what you had with my son was the type of love that comes once in a life time its true love and it’ll never end even when it has.”
I nodded as I saw tyga coming with the car and the I looked back at passionaye who said “he still loves you, you know.” before I could say anything he was getting out the car to open the door for us.
They dropped me off at my house so they could spend some quality time together and I needed to get home before shad did. I went into the house and made some chili and cornbread then waited for shad to come home. He was supposed to be done at the set at 5. I went up stairs and got ready before I knew it shad was behind me. He wrapped his arms around me. “hey beautiful”
“mmm I missed you today.” I commented as he kissed my neck. I turned around in his arms “come on” I said taking his hand and dragging him down stairs. “Here” I said handing him a bowl of chili and cornbread. “awe thanks babe” he kissed my cheek lightly. “your welcome” I smiled back “so what movie are we gonna watch?” he asked “you pick” “okay okay let me see here” he perused through the movies on the book self “here we go” he said putting in my favorite movies love and basketball.
We watched the movie but before it could even end I was asleep and I guess he was too because we woke up in each others arms on the couch with the main menu playing on the tv.
I turned over to look at the clock it was almost 10. “morning babe” shad smiled at me “morning” I said pecking him on the lips for him to kiss me back harder and pull me up on top of him just as the door bell rang. “ugh” he sighed “I’ll get it.” I said getting up and walking toward the front door.
“morning sleepy head” passionaye said as the door sprang open.
“morning” I said as I saw passionaye and Michael on my front door step with bags in their hands. It felt weird to see tyga this early he looked like he just woke up as well.
they walked passed me heading toward the kitchen and tyga whispered “nice legs” as he brushed past making me blush.
I headed over toward passionaye “so what’s in the bags?” I questioned
“breakfast” she responded with a smile on her face.“do you need any help?” I asked as tyga walked over to shad who was now sitting up turning the xbox on.
“no sweetie you just go get ready it should be done when you are”
“okay” I nodded heading over to shad so I could drag him upstairs’ and so we could finish what we started on the couch as well
I started the shower and went to get in when shad came up behind me and I could feel he was naked “can I join you” he whispered against my collar bone. I didn’t answer instead I just dragged him into the shower along with me.
MEANWHILE DOWNSTAIRS
TYGAS POV
“honey what’s wrong?” I heard my mom ask breaking my concentration.
“nothing” I shot out quickly.
“well I beg to differ. Lets talk about it it’s the only way your going feel any better.”
“mom its just…..its hard.”
“I know baby” she walked over hugging me.
“no you don’t know. I made a mistake when I walked out. It was stupid I knew she wasn’t ready but I asked her anyways. Then she said no like I knew she would and I made another mistake by walking out and ending the best thing I’ve even had.” I said tears feeling my eyes. I never cried but there was just something about Mariah that made all my emotions surface and everything I feel is a hundred times greater than it should be.
Mom hugged me again then said “she still loves you. Mariah still loves you I can tell by just one look at that girl. Now you both need to just find a way back.”
MARIAHS POV
After the hot and steamy experience in the shower shad and I helped each other get dressed and made our way back downstairs to have this wonderful aroma engulf our noses.
“That smells great” I said as I walked into the kitchen the smell now overwhelming.
“thanks baby” passionaye said as she carried the food over to the table. “alright boys lets eat.” she said toward Michael and shad.
Breakfast was nice we all sat around and talked for hours but then shad had to leave and I could tell he didn’t want to especially since tyga was still gonna be here.
“ill see you later babe.”
“okay” I said kissing him then walking him out to his car. He rolled down the window and said ‘I love you” I reached my head threw the window and kissed him “I love you too” I said as I pulled back. I watched him pull out the driveway before returning to the house but when I turned to go toward the house I saw tyga standing at the door and by the look on his face I could tell that he was hurt.
As I approached the door he opened it for me “tyga” I said turning around to face him but before I got out another word “don’t worry about it riah. Its fine, I get it” he said before walking past me back into the house. Michael played video games and me and his mom went down to my office and just had girl talk. She didn’t mention Michael which I was thankful for at the moment. I could tell that it was hurting her that her son was hurting every time she looked at my way. She decided to go out and buy lunch just some pizzas and bring them back here.
“alright so ima go get the pizza and maybe you can try to get my son away from that game” she said laughing as she walked out the door.
I made my way over to the couch and set down next to Michael “can I play’ he looked over then smiled “yeah” we played one game and the deal was that if I won he had to put the game up. We played madden 11 and I won, I knew I would Michael was never very good at this game. When I scored the final touch down I jumped up and yelled in his face “yeah! I win” and did my little dance then when I turned around he was right in my face and we both took another step closer to each other gazing in each others eyes. “I let you win” he said putting his lips on mine.
They lingered there for a second and then when he realized I wasn’t going to kiss him back he pulled away starring at me. When I looked into his eyes I saw myself and I’m not just talking about my reflection but I really saw myself. Its like my soul was looking back at me screaming this is what you want and most importantly this is what you need.
Tyga went to say something but before he could get it out my lips were pressed against his hard and I even slipped my tongue in. then he picked me up hands on my ass and slammed me into the wall as my hands went around his neck. Both of us broke the kiss laughing and then he carried me up stairs. “I missed you so much I should have never left.” he said I smiled kissing him again but my smile caused the kiss to break. We reached the bedroom door and he walked in slowly laying me gently on the bed then pulling his shirt off. My hands reached up exploring his chest then he raised me up pulling my shirt off. We explored each others bodies just like it was the first time. And right before he entered me he said “I love you” and I knew he meant it I could see it in his eyes.
It wasn’t long until his mom came back so we had to get dressed before she would come up here and see what happened. Michael and I still had a lot to talk about but we weren’t going to let it ruin the moment.
We made our way downstairs hand in hand and neither of us could stop smiling. “what is this?” passionaye questioned. Tyga and I looked at each other but we didn’t have an answer. “you know what never mind I’ma go back to the house Michael you and Mariah obviously need to work some stuff out. I’ll see you later” she said taking some pizza with her.
Tyga and I ate some pizza then watched a movie it was more of a way to buy time than anything. that’s when my phone rang shad it lit up I wasn’t going to answer but then tyga saw who it was and told me to take it.
M: hello
S: hey baby so listen I’m not gonna be able to make it home tonight they’re wanting to do a couple more scenes then I got the video after and an early photo shoot so I’ll just come home tomorrow for lunch. Okay?
M: yeah okay that’s fine. Have fun.
S: okay talk to you later. I love you bye
M: you too bye.
I looked over at ty “so shad wont be home till tomorrow afternoon. You think maybe you’d want to stay the night?”
“yeah if you really want me to.”
I kissed him ‘oh I really want you too.” I laughed climbing in top of him then today’s previous events happened again and again. By this time we were up stairs in bed just cuddling. This was the perfect chance to talk about us so I went for it “so what’s next?” I asked not looking at him.
“well I don’t know about you but I’m tired so I say sleep is next.”
“that’s not what I meant”
“I know” “what do you want to be next?” h asked me raising my head up so that I would be forced to look at him.
“I want us to be together again but I don’t want to hurt shad either.” I said truthfully.
He kissed my cheek then my lips lightly “me too.” he replied “now lets just get some sleep tomorrow is a new day and we can worry about everything then” he pulled me closer kissing my forehead. “I love you” he whispered
‘I love you too.” I said into his chest drifting to sleep.
When I woke up that next morning I was afraid of opening my eyes afraid that everything that happened yesterday was just a dream. Then I felt someone kiss my cheek so I crossed my fingers hoping it was ty. Before fully opening my eyes I kinda peaked threw my eye lashes. “what are you doing?” he laughed and then I knew I could open my eyes because he was here and this was real. “ nothing.” I lied not wanting to explain myself. He leaned over and kissed me “I got to get ready to go” “ what why?” I asked
“shad will be home soon and I think its best I go, unless you want me to stay and we can tell him together.”
“no I think I should do it alone just don’t tell anyone till I tell him okay?”
“okay.”
Tyga got a shower and his phone kept going off while he was on there so I went to shut it off when I opened up his text messages instead. There was dozens of messages from some girl named Farah. I couldn’t help myself so I read them I didn’t really think it was a big deal because tyga and I didn’t keep anything from each other so why start now. The text messages said:
Ty I really need to talk to you
Ty I miss you
Where you at haven’t seen you in a few days just call me when you can
Heard your mom was in town hoping maybe I could meet her
Okay so I know ive been blowing your phone up but I really need to talk to you. Its important so please call me back and so on….
that’s when I saw he had 2 new voicemails so I took a listen. The first one was for her just asking to call back and the second was saying that she hasn’t spoke to him in a week and she cant wait no longer for him to call or text back so she just gonna come on and say what she needs to say “ty I’m pregnant and its your’s” the words burned over and over in my head, then came the tears.
Ty walked out the bathroom and saw that I was crying so he walked over and dropped to his knees laying his head in my lap “what’s wrong baby?” he asked
I looked into his eyes and kissed him holding on with everything that was in me when I let go I looked in his eyes and said “we cant be together.” he looked at me confused so I handed him his phone and told him to look at his texts then listen to his voicemail. He did and he looked back at me and said “this does change things”
“yeah’ I laughed a little even though it wasn’t funny “you need to go call her and tell her that your gonna be there for her and the baby.”
“what about us?” he asked tears coming to his eyes because he already knew the answer
I knew that he needed to hear an answer so I tried my best to give him one “oh baby” we put our foreheads together looking in each others eyes “there is still an us its just that now we really have to be friends. Its just another chapter in our book.” the tears were rolling down both our faces now. “ this wasn’t supposed to be like this. We were supposed to get married and have a baby and be happy together for the rest of our lives.” he said
“I know and I should have said yes. I loved you more than anything and my pride just got in the way and If I could go back and change it would but I cant and we cant and we just have to move forward. Which is why you need to call Farah and to the right thing and take care of her and the baby.”
“your right I know your right but I just got you back and I’m not ready to lose you again”
“your not losing me in fact your never gonna lose me I promise.” I said and he leaned in and kissed me for what would be the last time. Then he got up and walked toward the door but before exiting he turned and said “you’ll always be it for me” I replied back with “I love you too.” with that he left and I was back where I started with him leaving and my heart breaking.
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