Baby Doll

“Stephanie?” Jason called as he entered my apartment. I didn’t answer him as I just sat on my bed and let tears slide down my face. I was crazy. My worst nightmare had become a reality and it rocked me to my very core. Ciara had told me what it was and how it could be treated with medications and more therapy but I wouldn’t listen.
“Stephanie you’re not answering your phone. What’s wrong?” He asked sitting on my bed and pulling my limp form into his lap. He brushed away my tears and kissed my hair as he kept trying to get answers out of me but I stayed silent as I yelled at the person that lived in my head. Leave me alone! Go away! I kept thinking over and over my insane chanting only stopped by my thoughts of “I’m crazy”. Jason laid me down on the bed and stretched out beside me. I only moved to bury my face against his chest.
“Stephanie please talk to me. You’re scaring me.” He pleaded. I shuddered. Would he still want me once he knew I was destined to go insane? Maybe I should just lock myself in a padded room now. My stomach heaved and I scrambled away from him and tossed my cookies on my floor. Jason grabbed the small trashcan from my bathroom and placed it under me then held my hair back from my face. After a while all I was doing was gagging and dry heaving into the trashcan. Jason lifted me gently from my bed and carried me bridal style to the bathroom. He flipped on the light then set me down on the counter. I didn’t look in the mirror too scared I would find someone else staring back at me. Jason grabbed a face towel from under the sink and wet it then started to wipe off my face. I took it from him to do it myself. Once my face was clean I brushed my teeth keeping my eyes on the sink the whole time. Afterwards we stood there a moment before Jason titled up my face and kissed me. He lingered before pulling away and brushing my hair from my face.
“Are you ready to tell me what’s wrong now?” He asked softly and I realized something. If I really was crazy and had another person maybe more then one living inside of me then she’d had sex with Jason. Even if it had been my body it had been her mind present when Jason had has sex with me. It wasn’t fair, having sex with Jason was something I dreamed about for a long time. His body fit against mine like a lost puzzle piece and he knew just where to place his hands and what spots on my body to pay the most attention to. Angry filled my veins immediately and I forced myself onto my tip toes and started tugging on Jason’s shirt to try and pull him down to my lips again. This time the kiss was anything but gentle and Jason noticed.
“Stephanie.” He murmured against my lips and I pulled away only to unzip my hoodie and let it fall to the floor. Next I tugged my shirt upwards but Jason stopped me.
“Baby I mean shit Stephanie stop.” I clenched my jaw.
“Why?” I asked letting my shirt go only to pull on the sleeves of his black jacket.
“Because I might be a nice guy but I’m only human. We can make out but keep your shirt on.” He said cupping my cheek in his right hand. His face was still close to mine and I snagged his lip between my teeth and dragged my teeth gently across his lip. I wanted to prove I was better then her. Jason reached down and smacked my butt making me let go of his lip with a yelp.
“Goldilocks please stop doing stuff like that.” He pleaded.
“Why you had sex with me that one night.” I said bitterly and Jason’s eyes widened in disbelief.
“Is that what this whole thing is about?” He questioned. I pushed him away with all my strength meaning I barely made him stumble back.
“No it’s the fact you slept with her when you’ve never even seen me naked!” I yelled angry tears falling down my face. Jason tossed his hands in the air as he finally let his anger show.
“What the hell are you talking about?” He yelled approaching my again.
“You haven’t heard the news. I’m fucking crazy. Ciara diagnosed me with DID.” I said as I let my body slid down onto the floor. Jason sat down beside me and reached out to bring me to his chest but I slapped his hands away before laying my head on my knees and started sobbing. I was such a fucking crybaby but it was how I coped with anything, it made me feel like I cleaned out my system, which helped to calm me but this time it wasn’t working.
“Stephanie what’s DID?” He asked quietly.
“Dissociative identity disorder is a condition in which a person displays multiple distinct identities or each with its own pattern of perceiving and interacting with the environment.’ I said quoting the website I’d looked at. After I fled Ciara’s I’d goggled DID and found out for all I knew I could have thirty different people inside of me that took control whenever they wanted.
“Stephanie do you think you where someone else that night?” He asked and I nodded and turned my head so it was still lying on my knees but I could look at Jason.
“You can’t be mad how was a supposed to know it wasn’t you?” He said taking one of my hands and squeezing it gently. I straightened then pulled my hand away before bringing it back to slap Jason hard across his face. His head snapped to one side because he hadn’t been expecting it and the angry sound echoed in the bathroom. Jason sat there silently for what felt like forever but what was probably only a few seconds. His cheek held a bright pink mark in the shape of a hand and his eyes reminded me of Matt. They where practically quivering in anger along with the rest of him and as I cradled my stinging hand to my chest I looked away. My heart felt like it had stopped beating as it sat in my chest silently.
“Get out Jason.” I whispered.
“He shook his head and I squeezed my eyes shut.
“Get the fuck out of my house!” I yelled.
‘No! I’ve done nothing to you and now you treat me like this Stephanie. I want to help you but how was it my fault for sleeping with you when it I didn’t know there was more then one person inside that fucked up head of yours?!” He yelled. I jumped up and glared down at him through my tears my heart stinging from the fucked up head remark.
“You should have noticed it wasn’t me and now you don’t want have sex with me. Are you with me because you want me or her?” I said.
“How can you even ask me that Goldilocks? Of course I want you because you’re you. You’re the one I fell in love with not her.” Jason said hid voice taking on a pleading tone.
“I don’t believe you.’ I whispered. I turned and started walking out but stopped in the doorway.
“Even Matt at least wanted ME. Now. Get. Out.” I choked out before turning to leave the bathroom but I stopped to when Jason smashed into me and yanked me to him harshly making me cry out from his tight grip on my arm. He smashed our lips together in mix of tongue and teeth. I screamed and fought against him but he just shook me until I stopped fighting then dragged me to my bed and tossed me onto it. I tried to scramble off but Jason yanked me back then pinned my squirming body under his. He stripped into his bare chest hovered above mine and I was only wearing my bra and underwear. He mashed our lips together again and I screamed and sobbed into his mouth as I still struggled to get away.
“Jason please stop!” I sobbed and he gripped my chin hard in his right hand and leaning so close our breaths mingled.
“Why you want me to treat you just like Matt did right? So tell me did he tie you up or just keep fighting to keep you pinned down?’ I didn’t answer as I pushed against his chest but when he yanked down the corner of my underwear I just covered my face with my hands and sobbed. Suddenly the pressure on top of me was gone and I heard Jason grabbing his clothes from the floor before he stormed out my house maybe my life and slammed the door behind him making stuff in the kitchen clink together. I kept my eyes closed as I curled into a ball and started crying again. A few minutes later something started licking and nipping at me ear. When I didn’t respond I heard a frustrated meow before Neko started licking my closed eye lids. I pushed him away gently and opened my eyes to stare into the kitten’s shiny blue eyes before I uncurled myself enough to pull the cat against my stomach and fall sleep with it’s warm body pressed against me as icy tears sliced down my cheeks and soaked the blankets and pillows beneath me.
□ □ □
Desiree P.O.V.

I pulled my bush through my hair harshly as I thought about today’s events while I got ready for my date with Romeo. He’d told me to dress comfortably so I was wearing a pair of faded blue skinny jeans and a white top with read lips on it with black script reading “Read my lips”. I had finished it with a pair of sneakers. But my mind wasn’t locked on my outfit. Stephanie now knew I existed and hadn’t taken it well. Instead of being happy there was someone making sure she got to experience the fun side of life she’d yelled at me to get out then she’d had that horrible fight with Jason. I bit my lip guiltily. It was my fault for sleeping for him but she should have screwed him sooner. But I never expected Jason to do that to her. To bring back the memory of every rape she’d been through then just leave, I thought he was a better guy but like he said he was only human. My cell phone lit up and womanizer started to play letting me know Romeo was calling me. I had a small cheap cricket phone so I could have numbers in there without freaking out Stephanie. Now that I thought about it I wondered if I could just cancel this once and use Stephanie’s.
“Hey Angel I’m waiting outside are you ready?” He asked and I took sprayed a small spritz of my vampire perfume(I know vampire perfume? Loser sounding but the perfume smelled like seduction in a red bottle)onto a vein in my neck then onto my cleavage followed by my left wrist. I rubbed my wrist together then gave my hair a final stroke before telling him I was ready.
“Do you want me to come up for a second?” He asked and I chuckled as I picked my cell and scooped up my pocket knife along with my keys and headed out locking the door behind me.
“No need Romeo.” I said hanging up as I walked down the steps and his Camaro came into view. Romeo got out and opened the door for me then shut it behind me. Once he was in and strapped in I leaned over and kissed him allowing my tongue to massage his lightly before I pulled away.
“So where are going?’ I asked plainly and Romeo laughed as he started driving.
“Only you can give a kiss like that then act like it was nothing.” He said licking his lips. I laughed.
“That wasn’t that good of a kiss.’ I said and he chuckled.
“Whatever Angel.” I scoffed and allowed a smirk to settle onto my lips. He was insulting my kissing skills if he thought that was the best I could do. Once we stopped at a stop light I knew took forever to turn. I undid my seat belt and moved closer to him. This time I gripped his cheek gently and turned it toward me and kissed him with more gusto if I may say so myself. One of my hands slid down to grope him then I trace the seam on the crouch of his jeans with the tip of my index finger when I felt him get aroused slightly by my touch. He let out a barley audible groan as I kissed my way to his ear.
“Lights green.” I whispered then scooted back into my seat and clicked my seatbelt back into place. Romeo smiled as he tore off don the street.
“You’re a tease aren’t you?” I looked out the window smirking again.
“Only when I really like a guy.” Romeo made an hmph sound. I glanced over at him.
“Or when I just want to have fun.”
“Which one am I?” He asked swerving into the left lane to get from behind a slow truck before getting back into the lane we where originally in.
“I don’t know yet.” I said and Romeo let a smirk of his own fall onto his full lips and I looked away ignoring the fluttering in my chest.