New: Revenge

WE WERE SUPPOSED TO MEET AT NOON. Why in the Infirmary, I didn't have a clue, but here I was, waiting in the back of the giant room. With Cade. Ready to go on a date he had planned in not-so secret with the help of Colleen and Gellen. I had no idea what the details were, of course, but the fact that today was D-Day was a fact that everyone seemed to be aware of. In fact, the entire school seemed to be so aware that I was blissfully left alone by the students and my friends. I had slept in, I hadn’t done any homework, I had been banned from the council room and anyone who approached me with a problem had been deftly herded away by someone else. Colleen had helped me pick out a white, billowing dress with a crisscross-strapped back and a sweater and she had done something to my hair so that it was up and off my shoulders. By the time she had finished with me and deemed me perfect, I had been getting nervous. I still didn't know if I was looking forward to this or not, but Cade was simply buzzing with excitement, his dust sifting around him in bright blue and white. No matter what I felt, he was happier than I had ever seen him and part of me felt a twinge of guilt for not knowing how I felt about him just yet, but I guess we would find out soon.
"Ready?" Gellen asked, turning around from the table she had been leaning over, working on something. She had elected to stay behind, probably at the urging of Roison, and fill in as the school doctor. Of course, I had a feeling that was only half the reason. Personally, I believed it was to keep an eye on me, for the school and for the witch hierarchy. Either way it was, I was grateful. It was nice knowing a witch had your back. Even a red-headed, eccentric one who had a love for blowing things up.
Cade smiled brightly at me, nearly bouncing in all his excitement as he watched me with eager eyes. It made him jingle slightly, all the jewelry that decorated his ears and body swinging or tinkling as he moved. "Ready, Pheobe?"
Nervous, I nodded, trying not to fidget or look so hesitant. I knew that Cade would never hurt me, but I didn’t like not knowing what was going on. Surprises had never been fun in my experience—even ones I knew were going to be good ones. "Sure. I guess."
Before I could ask any further about what was going on, Gellen muttered a phrase in Rune-ish and whitish-blue sparkles engulfed me as she smiled, crossing her arms. The room began to grow. No. . Wait, I began to shrink.
"What the hell?!" I exclaimed, my hands reaching out to grasp at Gellen. My arms were too short, so I missed, but she squatted as I continued to shrink. "Wait a second! Why am I shrinking?"
"For our date, of course," Cade said with a smile. In a cloud of his own glitter, he was a four-inch pixie, floating in front of me as I continued to . . uh, grow down until I reached the ratio of height I was supposed to be if I were a four-inch pixie. Well, almost four inches. I was quite a bit shorter than Cade and, even shrunken as I was, I still only came to Cade’s chin.
Pain laced through my back as I opened my mouth to tell him I hadn't agreed to this, and I bit back a scream as I felt something pop through my skin out of my back. The pain was a dull, odd sensation that felt like a shot between my shoulder blades, but since I wasn't expecting it, it made me gasp in surprise. Something was pressing at my back under my sweater, pressure building that was trying to escape, twitching and battering against the fabric until I shrugged it off, shivering slightly as I squeezed my eyes shut.
I opened my eyes when my body settled to see Cade standing above me with his hands on his hips and a smile on his face. His glitter was a happy whitish-gold and his wings hummed in anticipation. "Come on, Pheobe. Stand up and stretch your wings."
I gave him a confused look. Wings? What did he mean?
I grabbed the hand he offered and stood, not even realizing I had fallen to the floor then paused when I was on my feet, thrown slightly off balance. "What in the world. . . . " I spun, turning in a circle to try to see the wings I could feel coming from my back. They fluttered and almost vibrated with life, four iridescent, dragonfly-like wings that seemed ready to take me off the floor.
Cade laughed, ducking to avoid me. "Hey, watch it, Pheobe. You could knock someone out with those things."
I blushed and stopped turning, embarrassed by my fascination. "Sorry," I muttered. Raising my voice, I looked up at the now giant and smiling Gellen. "What did you do to me?"
She winced, rubbing her ear. "No need to shout. Pixies have a built-in voice enhancer when they're tiny. You should know that by now." She bent further down next to us and reached out a finger as if to poke me. I hid behind Cade, scared of being touched by someone so big, making him laugh and her smile. "All I did was a favor." She had a mischief in her eyes as she gave Cade a look. "And I expect it to be paid in full."
Cade smirked. "It will be, no worries."
She nodded curtly, delight making her eyes glimmer. "You have six hours before the spell wears off. You had better practice flying first."
"Right." Cade turned to me and grabbed my hands, holding them between us. "I want you to get a feel for your wings first—it helps if you close your eyes—and try to move them. Just move them."
Curious, I let my eyes shut and focused on my. . uh, wings. It was a weird sensation, a new one and I wasn’t sure if I liked it. I could feel them stretching out from my spine and above my head and further down past my knees. I could feel each and every individual cell, every twitch, and every speck of glitter that fell from them. They were sensitive, and yet not, every muscle ready and waiting for me to move them.
"Pheobe," Cade called softly. I heard amusement in his voice and a hint of pride and opened my eyes.
"Oh, my God!" I squealed in surprise, looking down, kicking my feet in surprise. I was hovering about three feet from the floor, Cade watching me from the ground with a blinding smile.
Then, suddenly, my wings just stopped moving. I let out another squeal as I tumbled to the ground, squeezing my eyes shut and waiting for the impact I was sure to come.
"Woah!" Cade exclaimed as he caught me. He stumbled a little under my weight then laughed, twirling me around. "That was great, Pheobe! I knew you'd pick up flying quickly." He set me down on the ground, his voice serious behind the smile. "Okay. Now, try it again, but don't freak out this time."
Nodding, I concentrated until I felt my feet lift from the ground, trying to tamp down on the excitement, the panic that flittered in my stomach. My wings hummed as they picked me off the floor, higher than before.
"Good," Cade praised as I opened my eyes again and waited for him. "Now try to move forward."
Unsure, I frowned, but, somehow, my body knew instinctively what to do and my wings flared and spread, sending me forward through the air.
"Awesome," I breathed. Curious, I brought my right wing so it reached straight out from my back and my body turned abruptly to the left, smacking me into the solid form of a table leg, sending me tumbling to the ground again. Thankfully, Gellen caught me before I hit the floor as well, laughing at my reddened nose.
"Well," she assured as I stood on her palm. "Practice makes perfect. Keep trying, Pheobe."
She slid me to the ground and for the next hour or so, Cade ran me through a crash course (literally and figuratively speaking) in flying lessons. By the time one o'clock rolled around, I was able to fly without running into anything or anyone, though Cade made sure to keep hold of my hand just in case I decided to cause a disaster.
"Alright," he said with a large smile. "Let's go on our date!" Without waiting for me to answer, he dragged me out of the Infirmary, calling out a thank you to Gellen.
We zipped through the relaxed halls of the school. Because it was Saturday and noon, the halls were only occupied by a few students lingering in groups or reading. Most of them were pixies enjoying the sunlight, but there were wolves here and there and even some vampires who could brave the sunlight.
The world was amazingly different from this size. Things that had seemed small or short in length were now daunting in their massiveness and there were sounds I hadn’t known existed almost assaulting my ears as we flew by. Everything seemed more detailed, too. As if, because we were so small, everything else was zoomed in. It was seriously cool to see the world this way, but I still had no idea what Cade was up to.
"Cade," I called as he continued to lead me through the school and down the stairs to the dorm hall. "Where are you taking me?"
He flashed a blinding smile, and I nearly drooled, the tingling that always shot through my skin when he touched me turning my stomach to butterflies. Cade was gorgeous human-sized, I knew, but in his true form, he glowed. It wasn’t just the massive amounts of glitter he was emitting, it was the way the wind blew through his hair, the way his eyes gleamed with delight as he flew and the absolute joy that encompassed his entire being. He was like sunshine incarnate and I was blinded by the beauty of him.
His green eyes flashed with boyish mischief. "To my world."
Suddenly, he stopped in front of the Pixie dorm door. It was a solid oak door with carvings and etchings of flowers all around it. I remembered the first time I had seen this door. It was inviting, friendly and carefree, but what lay beyond it could never be mine. Not only because of my natural size, but because of my blood. My heart leapt as I realized what Cade had planned, but I hovered in front of him, confused.
"Okay, Smarty-Pants," I quipped playfully. "How are we going to get in?"
"You think I'm dumb enough to screw it up already," he scoffed, but the grin he was sorting took the bite out of his words. "You have no faith." He squeezed my hand. "Stay."
Before I could stop him, he dropped my hand and started to fly towards the door, but he turned back at my slight exclamation of surprise when he let go. I really did not want to fall again.
He smiled teasingly, but there was a quiet gloating behind his sparkling teeth. "I'll be right here, Pheobe. No worries."
I sent him a bland look and he laughed, turning back to the door. He flitted up to one of the larger etched flowers and pushed on a petal. Easily, the flower moved, opening on hidden hinges to reveal the sunny interior of the Pixie dorm behind it. He turned back to me, smiling brightly as he held out a hand.
"Come on, Pheobe," he told me and I was momentarily stunned by the sheer beauty of him standing there silhouetted in the sunlight. "Let me show you my world."
I shook myself and smirked as I flew over to him and took his hand, trying for false bravado as those tingles shot up my arm again. "What makes you think I haven't seen the Pixie dorm before?"
He grinned as if he had the punch line to a particularly good joke. "Oh, I have no doubt you've seen the dorm before." He pulled me through the hole, flying backwards with a skill I could never hope to have. "But you've never seen it like this."
He was right. The dorm was completely different now and I was stunned with awe. I had no words to describe the sheer and utter splendor that met me as he dragged me through the dorm. At this size, we had flitted right into an overgrown garden. Stalks of flowers that shouldn't be blooming yet stretched above us in full blossom between the trees and stumps that seemed to be everywhere. Blades of grass shot up in spikes between everything, reaching high above our heads and casting shadows. Leaves littered the ground with pebbles that should have been as small as my finger, but instead were giant. A tiny stream I never would have seen had I been normal size weaved and sparkled in and out of giant violets that grew alongside the tiny path disappearing into the foliage.
"Wow," I breathed, unable to find the words. "Cade, this is. . . This is beautiful."
His smiled was gentle and kind. "I figured you would enjoy seeing things through my eyes at least once." His smile grew and he looked around with a fondness of someone who was home. "A date was the perfect excuse. Shall we?"
Excited for the first time since he had uttered the word "date," I let Cade pull me through the now-extensive grounds of the Pixie dorm. He showed, me flowers, nests, small hideouts and his favorite spots, answering all my questions along the way as we chattered and explored in wonder. Everything sparkled—and not just because of the pixie dust coating everything, but because, even without the other pixies walking in amongst the dappled sunlight, this place was magical. Absolutely breathtaking and wonderful. A whole new world I hadn't even known existed had been just a few inches off the ground this whole time and I would forever be grateful for this experience.
Finally, maybe two or three hours later, Cade led me to a secluded area in an overgrown part of the dorm way in a back corner and flush against the side of the many-paned, wall-window that revealed the sparkling snow and cold outside.
The contrast between the two worlds was amazing—which is probably what Cade was going for. This place, this dorm, went untouched by the seasons outside. It was a perfect spring here all the time. The snow beyond the glass could never touch here even though it piled high against the panes, creating a madness that was almost too hard to comprehend. The greatest part, however, was that private little picnic he'd set up in the bed of violets and roses. The flowers towered over us some, but their smell engulfed everything, almost lulling me into a calm.
For at least another hour, we just sat and talked, sharing information and getting to know one another in a way that we hadn't been able to before. I found that his favorite color was a pastel yellow, he was nineteen, he loved pizza and video games, and his tongue, belly-button and eyebrow were pierced, but that he had long ago lost his bro piercing in a freak attack by a bird and it had healed over some time ago. He told me about his family, his home and his childhood, which had consisted of Cornelius trailing after him and Colleen and Jade’s frequent visits. In exchange, I told him about my life at the hospital.
"You were always popular?" I asked some time later, reclining back on the blanket.
His brows rose. He was sitting comfortably with his legs crossed and his hands in his lap. "No, actually." He fiddled with the many bracelets covering his wrists as if embarrassed. "When we first came here—Cornelius, Colleen and I—Cornelius thought it was a chance to break away. After he went through the Change, he became cold and isolated. That left me and Colleen alone. And then Colleen met Jade again. . ." He gave me a sad smile. "That kind of left me to my own devices. When Taiyo and Elliot came around, I had already had a number of girlfriends and a reputation." He shrugged it away. "I was on break from it all when you came."
The fact that he'd had a lot of girlfriends didn't really bother me. Actually, the fact that it didn't bother me bothered me. I mean, I was his girlfriend. It should bother me. . . Shouldn't it?
"But, you know," Cade continued, leaning forward and tucking some of my hair behind my ear. "You're pretty popular yourself."
I blinked. Now that he mentioned it, I was rather popular. The realization made me frown. That was kind of crazy to wrap my head around, but it was definitely the truth, even if I didn’t want it to be. With Soren confessing the first month, then Gunner followed by Cade and Cornelius, I was more popular than most and I had barely done anything to deserve such attention. After becoming Student Council President, the whole school knew who I was. There was just no way I was ever going to fade into the woodwork again.
I wasn't sure how I felt about that.
"Hey, Pheobe?" Cade asked, drawing my attention back to reality. "Can I kiss you?"
I stiffened reflexively in shock, bolting upright, thrown off by the sudden question as my heart thumped in my chest. "Huh?"
He rubbed the back of his head, his cheeks flushing slightly. "Uh. . . Well, we don't have to if you don't want, but I really want to try. I mean, we are dating."
I shook my head, sitting up straighter and clearing my throat. "No, no. That's not what I meant. You just caught me off guard, was all. No one's asked me before, they just kind of did."
He leaned in closer, picking up my hand and kissing the palm. His eyes bored into mine, serious and passionate. "Well, I'm different, and I’m asking. So, may I?"
I swallowed again, my throat suddenly dry as my pulse raced. Maybe I wasn’t so indifferent to Cade as I thought. "Uh, sure." I smirked as he leaned closer to me, trying to lighten the mood. "It's the least you deserve for such a great date."
He smiled, leaned closer and closed his eyes. I did the same and was given a soft, sweet kiss with just a hint of tongue, our lips rubbing together and our hair tickling our faces. It was nothing demanding or intense, and there were no explosions behind my eyelids, but it was just as impacting as any other kiss I had been given so far. When he pulled away, I was tingling from the tips of my lips to the bottom of my heart. Literally. Little tiny tingles were shooting through my body. Why that was, I wasn't sure, but it always happened when Cade touched me, and only when Cade touched me. I sincerely hoped that wasn't going to affect my health, but at that moment, I didn’t care. If a kiss was supposed to leave you tingling and weak-limbed, then Cade could kiss me whenever he wanted.
"That was perfect," Cade murmured, pressing his forehead against mine. He leaned in for another kiss and whispered, "I love you, Pheobe."
My head snapped back and I looked away, my head clearing of cobwebs as my face heated and my heart tumbled in my chest. I was unable to think of what to say. I couldn’t answer his feelings the same way and that left me fumbling and uncomfortable.
He pulled away, smiling a little sadly. "Too much?" he asked.
I returned his smile, knowing it was stiff. "Yeah. Sorry."
He stood, trying to hide the rejection he felt as he rubbed the back of his head again. "Nah. It's okay. You just need time.” He grinned at me and I saw the sadness melt away to determination. “I'll make you fall for me one way or another."
I raised a brow at him, letting the awkwardness go as I raised my chin. "Pretty cocky, aren't you?"
His grin widened and the Cade I knew was back. "I've been known to have my moments." He offered me a hand. "Come on. The spell's going to wear off soon and I still want to show you my room."

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"SO. . . . " Gunner griped back in my room. He was lounging not-so-happily next to me on my bed, which was, unfortunately, littered with my school books and homework.
After my date and a painful transformation back to normal height and wingless back, Cade had dropped me off at my room, giving me a sweet, but chaste kiss goodbye, leaving me with the promise another date sometime soon. When I had showered away the sweat from the multiple changes and scrubbed most of the glitter off of my skin, I had hunkered down to finish—or try to—my homework. I had been ten minutes in when Gunner had knocked on my door, wanting my attention. I had planned to give it to him, honestly I did, but homework came first. I was so far behind as it was and the date with Cade had been a much-welcomed distraction, but it was a distraction that was swirling around in my head constantly.
I hadn’t really thought about how much Cade actually liked me. I could say that I didn’t have the time—and I didn’t—but the fact that I just didn’t want to look too deeply at his feelings for me was smacking me in the face. And now I couldn’t really see anything beyond them. My homework was taking a backseat to wondering how I was going to figure out what I felt for him or if I felt anything at all. I just wasn’t sure what it was that was battering around in my heart for Cade.
He was sweet. He was kind. He was considerate and handsome and he genuinely cared for me. I could see all of that easily, but what did I feel for him? I was fond of him, certainly, but was that all? And could I trust that emotion or was it all an illusion brought on by the weird tingling sensation I experienced when he touched me? Still, that kiss had been something. It had to be. I hadn’t felt what Cornelius and Gunner made me feel, but did that matter? Cade made me feel safe and warm, and there was nothing wrong with that. I wasn’t using him.
I frowned as the thought flitted through my head.
Using him? Was I? I didn’t think so, but why would I have to reassure myself?
I sighed, rubbing my forehead. I was tired, but I still had work and I needed to focus. My room was the best place to relax. Or it had been until a certain wolf had decided to interrupt my thoughts and solitude.
"How did you 'date' go?" He said the word "date" as if it were poison.
Cornelius was avoiding me, so Gunner and I were alone, and, man, he was pissed. Or just put-out. In fact, it was more like he was pouting—a fact I would find adorable if he didn’t wolf out so easily. Like any alpha, he felt like anything that was his was not to be shared. That meant that the fact that I was also Cornelius’s and Cade's girlfriend was not sitting well with him. It had put him on a very, very thin sheet of ice. If I said one wrong thing, I had no doubt he'd wolf out on me. That had happened once before and I absolutely did not want it to happen again. Ever. And, to make matters worse, the full moon was right around the corner.
"It was nice," I told him noncommittally, writing down an answer on the handout. I had work to do piling up on my desk, so I was distracted and not really paying attention to what I was saying. Running a school was no easy task. How Cornelius had done this and kept up with both regular classes and otherworlder ones was beyond me. And he had done it for years. It had only been a few weeks and I was ready to call it quits.
"Really?" Gunner asked stiffly. "And what exactly qualifies as 'nice'?"
I smiled softly to myself, thinking back. Despite all the confusion I had concerning Cade, I couldn’t deny the date had been wonderful. He had really pulled out all the stops and it showed. But how to describe it. . . I finished a question and moved on to the next one, forgetting to answer the wolf sitting next to me.
"Feathers," he growled.
"Hm?" I asked, distracted, not taking my eyes off the paper. This question was going to give me some trouble. .
"Answer me." He paused when I gave him a look that told him I did not appreciate being ordered around. Blushing, he lifted his chin defiantly but added, "Please."
Writing down the answer to the question, I answered him, my mind more on my homework than what I was saying. If he wanted to know, I’d tell him. "Well, Sweets, you remember our first kiss?"
His cheeks were bright red as he cleared his throat, crossing his arms. "Of course."
I answered another problem, glancing at my book for confirmation that I had it right. "Well, it was like that; Sweet and nice, with a little hint of excitement to keep things interesting." I should have paid attention to his darkening expression, but, dammit, I wanted to get this work done. "You know: nice. I really enjoyed it. After all this work, it was great to relax for once. I forgot what it was like to not worry."
"Are you saying you can relax around him, but not around me?"
My head snapped up at his tone, my eyes sharpening and my mind completely focusing on him. Uh-oh, this was not good. I'd seen this before. Those tense muscles, the hard line of his jaw, the tick in neck that said that his pulse was running too fast. These were all the signs I shouldn’t know, but couldn’t forget. And it meant that Gunner was about to wolf-out on me.
My heart thundered in my chest and my mouth went dry as fear gripped me, making my hands shake. I swallowed, pressing back against my headboard as I gripped my pen hard enough to snap it.
He was on the other side of the bed, his head down, his fists clenched, his knuckles white. I was not going to be able to get to the door before he got to me, and that did not look good for my health.
I deliberately made myself set my pen down and slowly scooted to the edge of the bed. "U-Um, I think I'm going to get some water." I didn't look at him as I swung my legs over the side. "W-Want anything?"
I was just about to stand when his hand flashed out, grabbing my wrist painfully, and flipping me back on the bed and away from the edge. I let out a gasp of surprise before the air rushed out of me, wincing as my elbow hit my book and I was left staring at a very angry Gunner that currently had my arms pinned.
His eyes were completely wolfed-out, the permanent cat-shaped irises glowing a firm gold instead of the warm chocolate they should have been. At this particular moment, though, it was the long, sharp canines that were worrying me. I'd learned early on that vampire fangs and wolf fangs were very different beasts. Though in the same place, vampire fangs were shorter, only reaching just out of the mouth and coming to triangular points. Sharp enough to do damage if they wanted and tear through flesh, but not hideously imposing. Wolf canines, however, were longer and thicker, coming to rest at the beginning of the chin in straight, sharp points. These teeth were meant for shredding, ripping and causing pain.
Those were the teeth I was staring at.
"You didn't answer my question," he growled, his voice guttural and hard to understand.
Fear made my eyes wide and my chest hurt with the force of my heartbeat. I needed to calm down I'd be in the Infirmary again. "Gunner," I said quietly, trying to stop my voice from shaking. "You're hurting me. Let go."
He growled, his hands tightening on my wrists and making me wince. "No!" he closed his eyes and I saw pain flash across his face. "Ever since you suspected me of being the one trying to kill you, you treated me like the enemy."
"Unless you've forgotten," I said before I could stop myself. "You did try to kill me."
His eyes snapped open and guilt and self-loathing filled them. "I was angry."
Feeling guilty myself, because that had been a low blow on my part, I let out a shaky breath. "I know. I know you were, but do you really expect things to go back to normal? Just like that?"
The incident I was referring to happened about a month ago. Gunner had been at the top of the suspect list when Simone had spelled the wolves into doing her dirty work. Of course, that had upset Gunner and he'd tried to convince me he had nothing to do with it. I hadn't listened and he'd lost his temper. Losing his temper had resulted in me having the crap scared out of me and Guide having to knock him out with the help of Roison and Sheree, our Moon Calling teacher. It had left a very bad impression. The same impression that made me so scared of him now. I couldn’t just flip a switch and shut that off.
He snapped his teeth at me and I sucked in a breath, trying to sink into the mattress. Papers crinkled under me, but I suddenly couldn’t care about my homework. "I already apologized! Why won't you trust me?"
Anger and fear made me rash and rashness made my mouth unhinge. I glared at him, tired of being afraid. "I do trust you. I just don't trust your control."
"I'm in control!" he yelled, the sound reverberating off the walls as his breath blew my hair back. I could feel him starting to shake and his nails were biting into my skin as they elongated. Shaking was not a good sign. Shaking meant that he was close to the edge. I needed to get him to let me go. The only way I could think to do that was to challenge him.
"Prove it," I demanded quietly. "Let me go."
He froze and I held my breath, praying that that did the trick. Slowly, his fingers loosened and he sat straight, climbing off me. Each of his movement was deliberate and strictly controlled as he sat on the edge of my bed, but his face hadn't changed. The anger was still there, and I wasn't sticking around to watch it boil. I didn’t trust myself not to set him off again. I just didn’t know how not to.
I got off the bed, sliding towards the door. "I'm going to get that water," I lied, making my way closer to the exit. I walked slowly, not wanting to catch his attention. Wild animals liked to chase their prey.
"You're not coming back, are you?" he gritted. It sounded angry, tight and accusing, but underneath that there was a sadness that pierced my heart.
It was my turn to freeze. I couldn’t help it. I hadn’t expected him to ask that. Swallowing, I pasted a smile on my face. Even I knew it was stiff, but I ignored that. "Of course I am." When you're not here, I added silently. "I still have homework."
I turned back to the door and turned the knob. There wasn’t anything I could do here except escalate the situation and I couldn’t let that happen. He needed to calm down and he couldn’t do that while I was here. I had hurt him—again—and all I could do was lie and leave. I just had to get out of here. I was too scared to stay. A few more feet and I'd be safe.
Gunner's hand pushing the door shut and holding it closed threw that hope right out the window. My breath caught in my throat and fear was once again shooting through my system like lightning, making my heart race and my palms sweat. My head was spinning. If he lost it in this small room, I was not going to survive it. There was nowhere to run or escape to. Nowhere to hide.
He leaned over me, his breath hot on the top of my head. "I don't want you to leave." His voice was lower than humanly possible and it sent shivers down my spine.
"I-I told you," I squeaked. I cleared my throat, trying to steady my voice. "I was just going to get some water."
He leaned down, placing his other hand on the other side of my head on the wood, effectively trapping me. He inhaled deeply, tasting the air around me. "Liar."
He dragged his teeth along the skin of my throat and I spun, clapping a hand over my neck as I faced him, panic and embarrassment washing my system as I realized how close he was. "Don't do that!"
His eyes—still glowing—narrowed on me. "Why not? We're dating, aren't we? What's wrong with a little foreplay between lovers?"
"N-Nothing," I agreed quickly. "I-I mean, we're dating, but-"
"But what?" he snapped. "There shouldn't be a 'but'." He slammed his hand on the door, rattling the wood and I flinched. "You did the same thing with that leech, didn't you?!"
"That was unplanned," I snapped back, holding tightly to my anger. The fact that Cornelius and I had slept together was not something I liked to recall overmuch. It had been unavoidable and a slight accident—not that I hadn't enjoyed it. In fact, I had enjoyed it immensely, but that wasn’t something I was going to tell anyone. Sleeping with him hadn't exactly put everyone on good terms with each other even though we hadn't done anything even remotely physical since. Not even a kiss. "And you're angry right now."
"Yes," he gritted. "I am. Do you even know why? Do you care? Do you even stop to think about my feelings before you go off with them?"
Okay, now I was seriously angry. I glared at him, poking him in the chest with a hard finger. "What do you expect me to do? Deny them because you get a little jealous? You're the ones who wanted to share me! Did you ever stop to think how this makes me feel? No. You just went and did whatever the hell you wanted!"
His fists slammed on the door and my eyes tightened, but I didn’t back down, even when I heard wood splinter. "What was I supposed to do? If I didn't jump at that chance, I would have lost you and you know it!"
"How do you know that?" I asked, matching his volume. Our voices were bouncing off the walls, loud and overbearing and heated, but it was too late to back down. If he wanted to hash this out, we would. "You didn't even try to think of an alternative." Pissed more than I had ever been, all my fear vanished under righteous frustration. I shoved him away and kept pushing at his chest as I spoke, startling him and making him growl. "You just thought of yourself. All of you! You took advantage of my confusion and used it to get what you wanted." I pushed him harder and he hit my desk with a smack, knocking over some things I had there. Watching my pens and a frame tumble to the floor snapped my attention back to the real problem—the problem I had probably just made as bad as bad could be.
Gunner didn't move, his head down, the wood creaking under the strength of his grip on the edge and I knew I'd gone too far. As quick as I could without alerting him, I began backing towards the door, my anger trickling out to be replaced by fear.
As a human, Gunner was a good head and shoulders taller than I was. In wolf form, he was half the size of my room—and my room was not small.
"So you don't want me, then." It wasn't a question and I had a feeling I'd hurt him deeply. His voice was almost unrecognizable now, but there was something else in there. Some other emotion besides the frustration and anger, and once again I was wracked with guilt. He had put himself in this position, but the fact remained that I hadn’t been giving him the attention he needed or deserved.
"I didn't say that," I said firmly, taking another step backwards. "I never said I didn't want you."
His eyes snapped up to mine and I froze. They were gold still, but also red-rimmed and overflowing with small tears. Tears of accusation. Tears that I had made him cry. Tears that made the guilt explode inside me.
"Gunner," I tried, taking another stop back. "Just. . . Calm down, okay?"
He grabbed my chair and threw it against the wall by my bed, shattering it and making me yelp in surprise. "Don't tell me to calm down!"
I sucked in a breath, panic lacing my veins and making me sweat. I had to get out of here. Fast. I could hear his clothes ripping as he began to shift and I didn’t want to meet his wolf again. I couldn't stay here. It wasn't safe. And, dammit, it was my fault.
Forgetting reason for panic I turned, rushing to grab the door, wrestling it open with shaking hands. Something grabbed my arm in a tight grip and I was spun back to meet the grotesque half-muzzle of Gunner's face.
"Don't run away from me!" he yelled in growled barks.
In that moment he changed and was forced to let go of me as his hands convulsed and shortened, forming paws. I didn't stay to watch his clothes rip apart or his skin split as he grew fur. I didn't stay to watch his bones break just to reform anew like I knew they would. I scrambled out into the hallway and yanked the door just as he launched his wolf at me.
He slammed against the door on the other side and I was flown backwards and into the wall, landing in a heap on the floor as I heard him claw, scratch, and throw himself at the door trying to get to me. His growls filled the hall, a dangerous keening accompanying the low vibrations and making my breathing uneven.
Afraid and slightly relieved, I painfully picked myself off the floor, holding my bruised arm close and leaned against the wall. It hurt to move and I needed to get my heart under control, but I needed to get out of here more than anything. Gunner was breaking the door down. I was almost positive that he wouldn't fit through it even if it was open, but I didn't want to risk being on the other side when it was.
"President. . ?" someone said. I turned my head to see a bunch of students, poking their heads out of their doors with curious and worried expressions.
Taking a deep breath, I straightened, tamping down on my own emotions. "Everyone get in your rooms and keep your doors shut and locked," I ordered loud and firm. "Do not come out until I give the okay."
Doors shut one by one as I made my way down the hall, repeating the message as a long, sad howl filled the air. By the time I made it to the common room of the dorm, I had a full house of worried and scared and curious students. But amidst all of that, I knew that Gunner had stopped beating at the door. The shocks of the brute force had stopped shaking the walls and his howls had gone quiet. He had either changed back or had lost my immediate scent.
Sighing, I stood on the table and whistled to get everyone's attention. "Alright, listen up, please. If you don't live in the Halve dorm, return to your own. If you are a Halve, I'm sorry, but you're going to have to find somewhere else to sleep tonight if your room is on this half-" I painted down the hallway that led to my room "-of the dorm. I will inform you tomorrow at breakfast in the Mess if it is safe to come back."
Getting down from the table, I remembered to add something. "If you live on the other part of the dorm, please return to your room and don't leave until instructed."
Chatter filled the air as everyone complied, going off in their different directions as I made my way through the crowd and out towards the SCP office. Even if Gunner had calmed down fractionally, I wasn’t going to risk finding out myself. I wasn’t that stupid.
When I got to my office, I used the PA to call the faculty and my friends before leaning heavily on the desk and trying to control my shaking.
Good Lord, what had I done? I had really screwed up this time. Not only had I caused the Alpha to wolf-out again, I had severely hurt Gunner in the process. Although I'd meant what I had said, I knew I could have worded it better than I had. I could have handled the whole thing better than that. And now, because of me stupidity, Gunner was wolfed out in the Halve dorm with more than fifty students as potential victims of his rage.
A knock sounded on the door and I composed myself before granting them permission to come in. I was lucky the office was large. Unfortunately, it wasn't large enough to accommodate the forty-plus teachers at the school and my personal council of about nine people. So, we relocated to the Mess.
When everyone had taken a seat, I stood at the head of the extremely long teachers' table and braced myself. I was seriously not cut out to run a school. Why Roison hadn't put an adult in charge was something I was going to beat out of her when she got back.
"We have a situation," I started, exhausted. I really needed some rest. From waking up so early for Cade’s date, doing so much paperwork for the school and then my homework, I was dead tired. But I just didn’t have the time.
I looked at Guide—who was freshly back from dropping off Basil and making a side-trip he had yet to tell me about—and gave him apologetic eyes. "Gunner has wolfed out in the Halve dorm. He's contained in my room for now, but I'm not sure if that will hold him."
Gellen laid a hand on my shoulder and I hissed in pain.
"Pheobe, you're bleeding," Cade exclaimed, rushing to me. Red dust sifted around him as he gently looked my arm over. Cornelius's eyes had gone red and he'd tensed, but otherwise hadn't moved. Unlike Constantine who had hissed in response, his eyes turning murderous.
"It's not bad," I reassured them, pulling away from them. I didn’t need comfort right now. I needed advice and help. I looked at Gellen. "Can you spell the room so he can't come out?"
She smiled. "I'm on it." She took off on a sprint, obviously aware of the dangers of having an alpha wolf on the rampage. I frowned as she went. Even if it was a serious situation, how quickly she jumped and ran head-first into danger was worrisome.
I turned back to the teachers, knowing that Gellen could and would handle herself. "I'm really sorry, everyone. I've instructed the students to remain in their rooms or find somewhere else to sleep. I wasn't sure what else to do. Sheree, how far away is the full moon?"
Sheree—a strong, tanned wolf with very short hair—promptly answered, "Two days."
I sighed and sank in to a chair. "And if Gunner doesn't get to me before then?" There were many a wolf at this table, a lot that were higher in pack rank than Sheree, but there was no other wolf I trusted more than her when it came to academic evaluation of the species. It made no difference that she had been spelled into attacking us once before. I would trust her easily with my life.
She crossed her arms as Gellen came running back in, her expression serious as she thought. "It depends on the wolf," Sheree told me with a cursory glance at the witch. "Because he's Alpha, the Moon may make it more intense. In a weaker wolf, it would be completely wiped out with the need to run and hunt." She gave Gellen a frown. "I hope your spell can hold that long, witch."
"It might," she told us, nodding. "I don't know. Since he's Alpha, it may only last for a day or two."
I scrubbed a hand across my forehead, thinking hard. "Anyone got any ideas?"
"You could just confront him," a teacher said, the suggestion hanging in the air for a silent moment before chaos broke out.
All at once, they all began to argue for or against the idea even as Cornelius and Cade yelled at me that that was stupid, Colleen backing them up with such vehemence that I would have sworn she would be sifting red dust if she sparkled. They all had a point, of course. Those for and against. Cornelius had been the one to save me the last time Gunner had flipped. He knew firsthand how scared I was of his wolf and just what it could do to me.
"Alright!" I yelled over everyone, fighting a headache. They all went quiet, their eyes turning on me. "I'll come up with something. Roison left me in charge, so I'm going to protect the students; that’s all that matters. For now, I think it's best for things to continue as normal for everyone not in the West side of the Halve dorm as possible. Classes will continue. If Gunner isn't back to normal by tomorrow, I'll have Gellen strengthen the spell containing him so we can go in and get the other students. Any objections?"
When everyone stayed quiet, I took that as compliance and dismissed all of the teachers except Soren, Guide and Gellen. Gellen began to work on healing my arm as Soren took a seat closer to my giant entourage. He was included in my close-knit group, but he had stayed at a distance since Simone had died. In his defense, I couldn’t blame him. I had broken his heart and then he had had it stabbed by the aforementioned bitch of a witch—literally. He had died in order to protect me and, being a vampire, started his immortal life in affect to losing his mortal one. Those were reasons enough to stay away, but I was grateful just to have him around.
Soren and I had a history, and not a very pleasant one. Ex-Guard and pureblood vamp, he was the epitome of beauty. With long, lavender tinted grey hair that was darkening as the days went by and he kept tied back with a blue ribbon I'd given him since his other one had been lost, perfect features, and mismatched blue and red eyes, he was almost too pretty to look at. He was only twenty-eight, but he was already undead, and the guilt ate at me every day, just as the nightmares plagued my nights. That had not been a good day for anyone. Neither had been the day he'd told me he loved me, but he was taking the fact that I had three boyfriends pretty well, even though I had rejected him. For that strength alone, I would have admired him if I hadn’t already had so much respect for the man.
He laid his hand over mine and I heard Cade's wings hum in warning. We all had learned to ignore that. Soren just liked to touch, and he knew that too much touching could send him into overdrive. Just as I knew that he needed to touch me almost as much as he needed my blood. It was a precarious line we drew and a tenuous one, but we walked it steadily and knew where we stood with each other. . . . I think.
"You handled that very well, Phebes." His voice was as calming and as smooth as water over silk, his touch just as velvety. "We'll figure this out somehow, okay?"
Oh, crap. I sniffed, tears welling. Soren always made me feel like everything was going to be okay no matter what, and, right now, that made me cry. He knew how to tap into my tear ducts just as easily as he knew exactly what I needed to hear and what I needed done. My heart clenched for him, aching with guilt that he knew me so well and that I was weak enough to let him comfort me.
"Hey!" Gellen exclaimed when I threw myself at Soren, tearing my free arm away from her as I started sobbing on his chest.
Everything came rushing back that I had pushed down. All the fear, the anxiety, the frustration, the hurt and guilt overflowed in unintelligible words and chopped phrases. I shook and sniffed and managed to tell him I had been scared, that I was sorry. And I was sorry. I was sorry for Gunner, for the way I had treated him—the way I still treated him—and the way I was treating Soren. It wasn’t fair, but I didn’t know how to make it fair. I was so lost and confused and I didn’t even know where to begin to start making the people around me happy.
Soren held me as I cried, whispering softly to me in comfort. I didn't cry for myself. I had not right to, no matter how miserable I felt, and Soren took it all in as everyone else looked on.
"It's alright, Phebes," Soren soothed me, stroking my hair. "We'll make things right again."
As I clung to him, calming down into breathy whimpers, I hoped to whatever god was up there that he had a plan, because I sure as hell didn't.