L'histoire du Kristopher et Lisha

I looked over at Kris, unsure of myself. I didn’t know why he had asked me to come to the team dinner. In all truth, I probably shouldn’t even be in his car right now. I had work to be doing and there was someone else he could have, most likely should have, asked to accompany him. But I hadn’t been able to say no to him since the day we met in 2006. That was five years of never being able to deny him what he asked. Five years of feeling like a failure because I was at his beck and call. Not that he really abused his power over me. Half the time, I’m sure he doesn’t even know he has so much power over me.

Maneuvering to sit with my back slightly against the passenger side door of his Charger, I looked him over. His black suit fit him well. The muscles in his arms were just this side of busting out of the jacket, but he didn’t look uncomfortable. Which was rare for Kris. He was the shy type. Only those closest to him got to see him really relaxed.

“So Kris, tell me again why I’m going to this shindig with you and not your girlfriend?”

He wouldn’t even look at me. “I told you. Elle n’ai pas vouloir venir avec moi. Alors, ‘ere you are. Beside, the team want to see you. It has been.... Quoi... Cinq mois since you ‘ave seen them? Dey miss you.”

I rolled my eyes. He’s lucky I was willing to learn French otherwise talking to him would be a bit of a nightmare. “I’ve been busy with my book,” I shrugged. “Besides,” I stretched the ‘s’ out to annoy him, “The boys have lives of their own. They don’t need some random girl around twenty-four-seven.”

“You are not a random girl. Tu es mon amie meilleure.” He pulled into the restaurant’s valet section and shut the car off. “Just ‘ave fun ce soir. S’il te plaît?” Kris gave me a quick glimpse of his puppy dog eyes and I caved, nodding. “Merci, ma petite chou.”

I got out when the valet opened my door and waited for Kris to meet me on the walkway. “How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me that? I’m not a fucking cabbage.” He laughed but ignored me. He offered me his arm. Sighing, I picked up my dress so it wouldn’t drag on the carpet and linked my arm through his. It was going to be a long night.

---

I was right. It was a long night. Kris ditched me after dinner because Mary showed up. I got up to use the bathroom and when I came back, she was sitting in my seat laughing with Kris over something. She looked stunning. Her dressed was midnight blue, strapless and stopped at mid-thigh. It showed off her long legs nicely. She didn’t have much of a chest, but you couldn’t tell looking at her in that dress.

I bit my lip and wrapped my shawl tighter around my shoulders. Holding my head up, I walked right past the table to the greeters stand. Stopping inside the door, I took out my phone and called a cab. This wasn’t the first time something like this had happened so I had a specific cabbie on speed dial. He’d been picking me up from functions for months and even gave me a discount because I gave him so much business. I looked back at the table, hoping someone had noticed I hadn’t come back. Jordan had a frown on his face as he eyed Mary, but he was the only one who didn’t look happy.

I knew Kris had been lying when he said the team missed me. If they did, more people would have seen me walk by. Out of twenty-something guys, only one might have noticed. I couldn’t even be sure that my absence is what put that frown on Jordan’s face. With a sniffle, I walked out of the restaurant and got in the waiting cab.

Welcome to the life of Lisha Michaels, Kris Letang’s “best friend.”



Two days later, I was holed up in my Philly apartment. I was curled up on my couch, my notebook in my lap and a few pens and pencils stuck in my hair. Huffing, I dropped my head back against the cushions. I couldn’t get the characters in my book right. It was clear in my head how they shouldn’t turn out, but translating them to paper wasn’t working. I wanted to finish the outline by next week, but at the rate I was going, I wouldn’t finish until the end of the month.

I had always sucked at writing character descriptions so it was the thing I tried to do first. In attempting to make the people in this book different from my last books, I ended up throwing myself into confusion. I re-read all my work, making more notes on all my other outlines about each character. I didn’t want anything to be the same. My brain was a jumble of words I’d written in the past. I groaned and tossed my notebook to the side. I needed to get out of this place and clear my head.

Standing and stretching, I made my way into my room to get my Sperry’s. I fixed my hair as I went and gathered all my things into my backpack. Re-entering my living room, I shoved all the pencils and pens that were in my hair into my bag along with my notebook. I carried it with me in case I was struck with the need to write.

Just as I was leaving my apartment building, my phone started ringing. It was Kris. He hadn’t called me since he asked me to go to that stupid dinner with him. I hit the ignore button and started my walk toward my favorite part of the city, the Wells Fargo Center. Kris called two more times but I ignored those calls as well. I was beginning to rethink my friendship with him.

He said we were best friends, but I barely ever heard from him. I was always playing second best to Mary. Not that that was completely wrong, but I felt like I deserved to be treated a little better. He didn’t call me unless she didn’t want to hang out with him and I was maybe fourth on the list of people he saw when he had time off.

It wasn’t always like this. Before Mary came into the picture, he actually took time to talk to me and would drag me around town on his off days. We were actually friends. But then Mary entered his life a couple years ago. It started slow, not calling on all his off days and missing some of my calls. I let it go because he was in a new relationship and it made sense that he’d want to spend as much time with her as possible. Then he stopped inviting me to games and asking me to wish him luck on his road trips. I didn’t know what excuse to make for either of those things.

Then it moved to me having to call him to see what he was up to. After a month of him missing my calls, I gave up. He and Mary had been together for 6 months at that point. I thought he would have figured out how to balance a girlfriend, hockey and his social life by then. It took me about two months to realize that he had basically dropped me. And the only reason I figured it out was because his mom called to ask why I hadn’t come home with him for the Christmas break like I had the previous years. When I didn’t have an answer for her, she started talking about how nice Mary was. I had to make an excuse to get off the phone with her before I broke down.

Kris was the constant in my life for three years. We met just after my dad passed in a drive by. He was the one sure thing in my life...until Mary. I didn’t want to believe that he would break his promises to me, but it was slowly happening. I couldn’t even blame Mary for it because she was nice to me. Every so often, she would call me for a girls’ day or just show up at my apartment with movies and junk food. When I asked her how she knew where I lived, she said Jordan told her. That was one of my first clues that Kris was pushing me out of his life. His girlfriend of 8 months found out where his best friend lived from one of his teammates.

Plopping down on a bench outside of the arena, I decided to people watch. It was only midday so I knew people would be around. I took out my notebook as I sat. I wrote down any random ideas that came to mind, knowing I might be able to use them for my book or some flash fiction later.

My phone rang after about an hour. It was Mary.

“Hello?”

“Hey girl, I showed up at your place and you weren’t there. Where you at?”

“Just out. I needed to clear my head.”

“Oh,” she paused and I heard talking in the background. “Well, uh, can I come pick you up? We need to hang out.”

“Mary, I know Kris asked you to call me. I heard him. Just tell him I need a few days, maybe a couple weeks to myself. Please?”

She sighed, “Lish, just talk to him. I’m not going to play messenger for you two. You guys are 23. You know how to communicate.”

“I’d rather not. Do it this once and I won’t ask again.” She grumbled for a few minutes before agreeing. “Thanks girl. Call me next week and we can set up a movie night.”

“Yeah yeah. Lates, chickadee.” She hung up before I could say bye.

Running a hand through my hair, I continued to people watch. This had to help me in some way. I was getting desperate for things that took my mind off my failing friendship.

After a few more hours on the bench, I decided it was time to eat. I always skip breakfast and then forget to eat lunch. So by four o’clock, I was practically starving. I ended up catching the bus to the business district so I could get some food. Kris sent me a few text messages, but I didn’t open them.

To be honest, I wasn’t sure what to make of him trying so hard to get in touch with me. Over the past year, any time he dropped me for Mary or his teammates, I didn’t hear from him until there was some other event he wanted me to go to. It should have been a sign that something important happened, especially since he roped Mary into calling me too, but I couldn’t believe that. He wanted something. I just wasn’t sure I wanted to find out what it was.



What I thought was going to be a quiet dinner was anything but. I had a somewhat private table in the back of Kokopelli’s. I had figured out how to separate my new characters from my previous ones and I was writing like a fiend. It felt nice to settle into my writing. Though the feeling was disturbed shortly after my food came.

“Lisha.” The lead of my mechanical pencil snapped. I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping I was just hallucinating. “Hey, no trying to wish me away. Je suis ici. Regardes-moi.” Peeking an eye open, I looked up from my notebook to meet Kris’ chocolate eyes. Dropping my shoulders, I sat up and looked at him straight.

“How did you find me? You don’t know your way around Philly.” I took a bite of my burger and shoved a fry in my mouth.

“ I ‘ave my ways. Maintenant. Why did you not answer my call or text?” He stole a fry off my plate.

“I don’t know,” I mumbled, sinking into my seat a bit. What is with Kris today? First he actually remembers I’m alive shortly after dropping me and now he wants to talk about why I didn’t answer his calls? He never wants to talk about anything but hockey or Mary anymore.

“You do know. Dites-moi.” He had a serious look on his face as he waited for me to answer. I chewed my lip trying to come up with a suitable response, something other than the truth. I may have been questioning our friendship, but he didn’t need to know that just yet. Not able to come up with anything, I opted for changing the subject.

“Shouldn’t you be spending time with Mary? You have a road trip soon and I know she’s going to have to leave for work before you.”

He continued to look at me for a few minutes before he answered. “I was spending time with her. But, I got concern when my friend no answer her phone. Tu dois me parler. I want to know what is wrong avec toi.”

I groaned, “Nothing’s wrong Kris. So I didn’t pick up or text back? Ever think that I could have been busy? Or didn’t hear my phone?” I took another bite of my burger. I didn’t understand why I tried to lie to him. He could see right through me. He could tell when I was lying the day we met, and he could still tell today.

“Non. You answer when I call. Always. It ‘as been dat way for cinq ans. So why is today different?”

Looking at him, I could see he wasn’t going to give up. “Let me get my check and we can go. I don’t want to talk about this here.” More like I want to be able to escape you easier if this gets ugly. Kris paid for my food when the bill came. It irritated me when he did that, but he never seemed to care. He said that it wasn’t a big deal and he liked being able to take care of his friends. What if the person you’re paying for isn’t sure you’re even friends anymore?

I followed him out to his Charger and let him drive me back to my apartment. It was silent in the car except for the radio. I rolled my window down to make it harder to talk. I had to get my head straight to have this talk. I had to build up the courage to have this talk. I could tell Kris was going to force the issue until I let everything out and I wanted to be as prepared as possible. I still wasn’t sure what I wanted to do about our friendship, but I knew I would be making my decision today.

This isn't what I planned for the day when I woke up this morning.



For all the sounds of my apartment complex, the walk up to my place was more silent than the car ride. It was also more tense. I think Kris caught onto the fact that this was going to be more serious than any of the talks we’d had before.

Once we made it in, I went straight for my room to put my things away. I was buying time and we both knew it. Kris was gracious enough to let me stall for a full ten minutes. I’m not even sure what I did considering I didn’t have much to put away. I finally forced myself to leave my room when I started reorganizing my shoes.

Kris was sat on my couch, flipping through one of my National Geographic’s. He tossed it back onto my glass coffee table as I flopped onto the couch. He turned to face me, his legs crossed in front of him. I pulled my knees up to my chest and pressed my back against the arm rest.

“Well?” He leaned forward slightly, waiting for me to answer.

I didn’t have one though. I had been thinking about this off and on all day and I still didn’t know what I wanted to say to him. I let the silence stretch for a few more minutes before I attempted to respond to him.

“ Kris... I don’t think we should be friends anymore.” He instantly sat up, his back rigid. “It’s just...I feel like that’s the right thing for us. We haven’t really even had a friendship this past year. I kinda feel like a call girl, except without the plus of getting laid at the end of the night.” I looked down at my knees, picking at the fabric of my workout pants. I felt Kris get off the couch. “I’m not sure if I fit into your life anymore.” I swallowed down the lump in my throat as I glanced at him.

Kris stood at my bookshelf. His hand rested on the shelf that held all my pictures and knick-knacks. Most of the pictures were of us during his summer vacations. Well the first three summers of our friendship. Some were in Montreal, others in Pittsburgh. I had a picture of him and Luc from Juniors as well. He gave me that one when he started spending a lot of time here during the second year of our friendship. He said it was only right his best friends got to see each other daily. Other photos were of us and his family during Christmas. I even had a couple of me and Mary up there. She said she felt like we weren’t real friends until she got her picture on my shelf.

“Non.” My eyes snapped to him. “We are not going to stop being friends.” He spoke slowly, making sure to get every word right.

“Kris-”

“Non, Lisha. Five years. I am not going to give dat up.” I dropped my eyes from his. I knew this would be hard. That doesn’t mean part of me didn’t wish he would have just agreed and walked out the door.

“Kris, let’s be real. The last time we did something together was when you won the Stanley Cup. I spend more time with your girlfriend than I do you and that’s saying something since I only see her about twice a month.”

His jaw set. “Non. You are my friend, ma soeur. So we ‘it a rough part of our friendship. I fuck up. I know that. Dat is no reason to stop us. I will be better. You mean too much to me. Je refuse mettre fin à nos amitié.”

“Sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to.” He exploded into French that I’m sure was extremely foul. He was speaking to fast for me to understand most of what he said. I caught the F-word a few hundred times but beyond that, I chose not to try to decipher what he said. I left him to rant while I went into the kitchen for something to drink. I sat at my kitchen table with my water, listening to him pace and swear. A little bit of English started to slip in so I knew he was calming down.

With the way things had been going for us, I honestly wasn’t expecting him to throw such a fit. Should I have seen it coming? I mean it’d been a year. Hell, he didn’t even show up for my birthday. I just got a text message.

Kris came into the kitchen. I looked at him as I took a sip of my water. Deliberately, he walked over to me and knelt next to my chair. His arms went around my waist and he buried his head in my stomach.

“Lisha, I cannot lose you. You ‘ave been the one sure and steady t’ing in my life since I enter the NHL. I am sorry that I ‘ave been ‘orrible to you, but please, please do not stop being my friend.” Any tears that I had managed to hold back earlier escaped at that point. He sounded so pitiful. I let my hand fall to his back and he somehow moved closer to me and held on tighter. Rubbing his back, I bit my lip.

“Alright, Kris.”

We didn’t talk anymore that night. But we didn’t need to. I knew he would make me talk about it all until we were back to being real best friends. Kris wasn’t the type to make the same mistake twice when it came to the people in his life.

Instead of keeping the somber mood of the evening, Kris decided we needed to do something we hadn’t done since he got with Mary. He dragged me into the living room, pushed me onto the couch, and made his way to my bookshelf. We took turns acting out random scenes from our favorite novels until 4 am and then crashed on my living room floor surrounded by books.