The Inbetween

The days seemed to pass by for Jimmy after Gabriel’s visit to him in the Inbetween. He was still somewhat bitter about being stuck in the place, having to watch his wife and friends learning to move on without him, but he had gotten over the anger. He knew that he couldn’t blame anyone for his death. It was a freak accident, or fate, or…whatever it was. But he knew it was no one else’s fault.

He sighed and pushed his hand back through his hair as he sat in front of the tree, looking down at Earth and watching various people. It was something he had started doing recently so that he could keep his mind from wandering to Leana and his unborn child. He didn’t know if he could handle seeing her growing round with a child he’d never be able to hold, and he didn’t know if his heart could stand the hurt he’d see when the child was born.

He knew that Leana still blamed him for having left, and he couldn’t be mad that she was upset with him. He didn’t know if his death had been preventable, or if had just happened, but she had every right to be upset with him. She had been left there, pregnant and alone with no way to get him back.

The angel’s other words were something he thought about often as well. You need to find faith again, Jimmy. You need to find it in your heart before she can return to you. The words still made as little sense to him as they had when he’d first heard them, though he couldn’t help but think to himself that there was some deeper meaning in them. It seemed that the more he allowed himself to think about them, the more he realized that this was no longer just his life.

He heard footsteps approaching him a few moments later and turned to come face to face with Jared. The small boy had something bundled tightly in his arms, and confusion made itself clear on Jimmy’s face. “Jared?”

“Hello, Jimmy.”

The boy didn’t say anything else as he moved to sit next to Jimmy before he handed the bundle that was in his arms over to the tall man, a smile on his face. Jimmy allowed his blue eyes to look down, and he gasped when he saw that it was a baby, wrapped in a tight pink bundle.

“Who is this?” He asked, his voice thick with emotion. “Tell me she didn’t die down there because of abuse, Jared. I don’t know if—”

“This is your gift,” Jared cut him off with a small smile. “You were told by Gabriel that you needed to find faith. This is your way to finding it.”

“Why does everyone talk in fucking riddles here?” He asked in a grumbled voice, narrowing his eyes at the teenager before his eyes looked down at the baby again. “What do you mean, this is my way to find faith?”

“This is your daughter.”

Jimmy’s eyes widened, and he allowed his eyes to look down at the baby again. Upon closer inspection, she definitely looked like his daughter; with his wide blue eyes, and his thin lips. She was absolutely beautiful, and he couldn’t believe that he had had a hand in creating her.

“She will be born on July 15th,” Jared added slowly. “In Earth time, that is five months away. You’ll have that long to find the faith you need, Jimmy. Also, some things will be changing for you.”

Jimmy’s eyes narrowed, wondering what changes could possibly be happening, knowing that they couldn’t be good for him at all. When Jared saw that he had his attention, he sighed and pushed his hand back through his short dirty blonde hair before he spoke again. “Your objective while you’re here in the Inbetween is no longer to look after lost souls,” Jared sighed. “You need to take care of this baby girl, and make sure that she is born safely.”

Jimmy’s eyebrows arched, and he sighed before pushing his hand back through his hair again, looking down at the now-sleeping infant. How was he supposed to take care of a baby when he’d never looked after kids before? He didn’t know what this little girl would need while he was in the Inbetween, but he knew that he needed more information.

“What…What do I need to do?” He asked Jared. The teen let a smile form on his face before answering the question, seeming much happier than he had a few moments prior.

“Just be her guardian,” he spoke. “Make sure nothing happens to her. This is her soul, Jimmy. All people have a souls, and while her body is growing inside of your wife, you need to make sure that she remains safe. It’s in your hands, Jimmy.”

His face fell when he realized what had just been spoken. “…What if something happens to her?” He asked quietly, not sure if he honestly wanted the answer to that question.

Jared’s face fell, and he looked down at the ground. “Broken souls are what create the human evil on Earth, Jimmy. You see, all people start out good and wholesome. They start out like this baby girl; pure and untainted. If you allow something to happen to her, she could be born like that, or…she could not be born at all.”

He nodded, understanding the seriousness in Jared’s words. He needed to make sure that she stayed safe. He would never allow something to happen to his child, he told himself. Especially now that he had no other way to be there for her. He only had a few months to spend with his daughter—a few months out of her entire lifetime, and he was going to make damn sure that those few months were where she was safe.

“I understand.”

Jared nodded and then stood up to leave, putting a small smile on his face before he left, leaving the two of them alone. Jimmy didn’t know what to say or do as he looked down at the baby girl in his arms.

He felt as if he wasn’t worthy of having the opportunity to spend some time with his child, especially when he’d never know her while she was alive. He knew that it was an opportunity that he couldn’t waste, as well. He needed to make sure this baby girl’s soul stayed just the way it was now—pure, clean, and whole. He didn’t want her to follow the same path that he had in life.

He didn’t regret the things he’d done, and he wouldn’t take any of it back. If he had another chance, he’d do it all over the same way. But that wasn’t an existence that he wanted for his daughter. He wanted to make sure that she had a chance to do things that he never had; that she could be the kind of person he had never become.

He wanted her to be like her mother. He wanted her to understand that love was the most important thing in life, and that with it, anything could happen. He wanted her to have the kind of heart that didn’t judge other people for their outer appearances, and he wanted to make sure that she realized that it wasn’t about the number of days in life, it was the quality of it.

“I’m going to take care of you,” he said softly as he looked down at the little girl, letting one of her small hands curl around his finger. He felt like he’d been given a huge responsibility to take care of her, and it was something he wasn’t going to waste or take advantage of. He was going to follow through on his promise to take care of this little girl, and then, when it was time for her to be born, he was going to watch as she lived her life. He didn’t yet know what she would think of him after she got old enough for Leana to tell her about him, but he knew that he hoped she’d think fondly of him.

The little girl gurgled loudly and then spat up a little, and he groaned before wiping her mouth clean with the bottom of the shirt he was wearing. It wasn’t going to be easy, watching after this little girl, but he knew that he could do it. It was something he’d always wanted when he was alive, and this could be his last gift to Leana. This little girl could be his lasting legacy, and he wasn’t going to let anything happen to her.