The Inbetween

Jimmy pushed his hand back through his hair as he set Hope down on the grass beside the tree as he sat looking down through the clouds at his family and friends down on Earth below him. He missed being there with them almost more than anything, but he also knew that it had been his time to go. There had obviously been a reason behind him being taken from his life, and he had a feeling that the reason was Hope.

He also found that he missed having Faith in his life here in the Inbetween. He wondered how she would react with Hope and how she’d feel about him being a father from beyond the grave. He had no idea how he’d been lucky enough to get Leana pregnant before dying. This was something that they both needed, even though it was in very different ways.

Leana needed this baby because her heart needed a piece of him to be able to move on and be at peace with what had happened. He’d been jerked out of her life so suddenly, and when he’d been such a huge part of her life for so long, he knew that it was important for him to leave some small piece of him behind. And even if neither of them had thought she was going to end up pregnant, he was certainly happy that she was.

Jimmy, on the other hand, needed this baby because he knew that she’d help those he’d left behind moved on. He didn’t know if he could rest at peace knowing that this loved ones were still torn apart by his death. He knew that they’d move on eventually because that was just a part of life. People died and life went on. But Jimmy knew that for his friends and family, that would be harder said than done, and he knew that if Hope was born without any complication, she’d help them with moving on.

He smiled when he felt her wriggle closer to him on the grass, and he couldn’t help but reach down to touch his hand lightly to her head, touching her forehead with his thumb before he looked down at her. He still didn’t understand how he’d had a hand in creating something so beautiful and so innocent.

“She’s beautiful.”

Jimmy jumped and nearly hit his head on one of the lower branches of the tree he was sitting underneath when he heard a softly spoken female voice. It was a voice he hadn’t heard in so long that he was surprised to be hearing it now.

“Faith?” He asked as his eyes wandered up and down her body, wondering what had happened to her. She didn’t look like she had the last time she’d seen him.

Faith just gave him a knowing smile and then nodded before she approached him, looking down at Hope with him.

“It’s me,” she said simply before she crouched to pick up the baby girl, a wide smile forming on her lips when Hope grabbed onto her hand. “I haven’t picked up a baby in so long,” she murmured softly.

Jimmy gave her an apologetic look, knowing that she was thinking of her son and her life that had been put on hold down on Earth. She continued holding Hope for several minutes, cradling her softly and then kissing her forehead before she handed Hope over to Jimmy, her wide eyes looking up at him.

“So what’s the message this time?” Jimmy asked curiously, wondering what she’d come to tell him. He had figured out by this point that any time anyone came to see him here in the Inbetween, it was because they had something that he needed to know.

Faith laughed heartily before she shook her head, looking up at him. “I don’t have any messages,” she told him lightly before she smiled. “I just missed you, that’s all. I wanted to come and see you; see Hope. See how you were doing,” she murmured before hesitantly taking a step closer to him.

Jimmy’s breath hitched in his throat in spite of himself. He didn’t know if he should feel his heart beating faster in his chest, but any time Faith had ever given him the look she was giving him now, it made him feel conflicted about just who he was supposed to have ended up with. He knew that he loved Leana with his entire heart; she was the woman he’d always wanted to spend his life with.

But he wasn’t alive anymore, and he had to acknowledge that. Faith was here, and he had to wonder if she was supposed to be the girl he was with beyond life. He didn’t know what would happen if Leana ever joined him in Heaven—which he had no doubt that she would do someday—but he knew that he felt something for Faith.

“It’s not so complicated,” she murmured quietly before she reached to touch his arm lightly, moving closer again before she pressed her lips against his shoulder. “It’ll all sort itself out in your head eventually, Jimmy.”

He could only nod, unsure of exactly what else to do. She leaned her head on his shoulder before wrapping her arms around his waist in a tight hug.

He could feel it in the way she was holding him that she had missed him. He was glad to know that she had, because he’d certainly missed having her here with him. He cleared his throat and then looked down at her, his eyes meeting hers.

“Can you stay?”

Faith groaned, unsure of how she was supposed to answer his question. “I can stay for awhile,” she finally told him, not wanting him to think that she’d permanently stay in the Inbetween with him. He still needed to learn how to move on and let go of the people he held closest to him, and Hope knew that that was the only reason he was still here in the Inbetween. If he could learn to do that by the time that his daughter was born, he’d be able to come to Heaven and join her there.

But if he couldn’t, Faith didn’t know what was going to happen. And that scared her.



Leana groaned as she lay in bed holding Jimmy’s pillow tightly against her body. It still held his scent, and when she was upset like she was right now, she found that it comforted her and made her think that everything would be okay. But deep down, she doubted that it would.

She was happy to have this baby coming, and she knew that in a way, it was going to help her to move on from Jimmy’s sudden death and absence from her life. But she also knew that with the baby’s birth would come a whole new set of challenges, and they were just now starting to worry her.

What if the baby was born looking like a spitting image of Jimmy? It was a frightening thought, but she knew that it was a very real possibility. What if it had his quirky personality and penchant for finding trouble? She knew that she’d love the baby more than she’d ever loved anyone or anything before, but she also knew it would be hard to see her deceased lover in their child every day for the rest of her life.

She didn’t want to become one of those mothers who became bitter and angry with the child after it was born just because of how similar it looked to its father. She wanted to be there for this baby; to love it and nurture it enough for both her and Jimmy. And she knew that she could do that if she prepared herself mentally for it. But she found that she’d run into a roadblock when it came to that.

She still couldn’t get past the fact that Jimmy wouldn’t be coming home again. She still hadn’t quite figured it all out in her head; her heart was still torn in two, and the aching feeling that had consumed her whole body since she’d found out that he was gone had shown no signs of leaving. She felt as though he’d died just yesterday, when in fact he’d been gone for months now.

“Oh, Jimmy,” she whispered under her breath, holding on to his pillow as her tears started to fall out of her eyes. “Help me to move on.”