Secret Love Affair

We leave in two days. Well...actually Arabella, Lena and Mina leave in two days. Wait- I would be leaving too because I have to gather some of my belongings but then I'll return to London two days later.

Dougie's been acting down lately. I think it had to do with one of his lizards dying. I never really talked to Dougie about what would happen 'if I leave' as everyone thinks. We've been avoiding that topic by just making out.

I sat in one of those spin chairs and twirled around, nervous. I was quiet the whole time- rare. So was Dougie - Typical.

"How am I gonna break it to them?" I mumble, thinking about the girls to myself.

"What was that Lara?" Mina asked politely.

"Nothing." I pipe up.

I briefly look at Dougie. Other than deep in thought about breaking my happy-yet-sad news, I wondered why Dougie never called me his girlfriend. Have you noticed that whenever we talk about 'us', we always say 'with you' or 'together' or 'I'm yours' etc? I haven't called him my boyfriend yet because he hasn't called me his girlfriend yet. I see him as my boyfriend though. Maybe he hasn't called me his girlfriend yet because he thinks I'm really leaving!

Oh dear...

As I'm spinning a thousand miles per hour in my chair deep in thought, my dad- McFLY’s boss- walks in smiling.

"We have important matters to discuss!" He said as one of his assistants followed him in, cell phone always in hand. Everyone became silent. I stopped spinning. I felt sick. And it wasn't because of the spinning.

"What about?" Danny asked thinking I was about the band.

"Its not about the band, Danny. Its about Lara." My dad looks at me.

I get up and stand next to him as he commands me to. I suddenly find my shoes interesting. I then look at Dougie once and there's this look in his eye that says, "Shit we're caught."

I look back at my shoes knowing that that is not it...yet.

"About Lara?" Arabella asks looking at me. I give her a crooked smile.

"Yes. You see, last week we did some father-daughter bonding time and I offered her something that would set her career up in the blink of an eye." He said proudly. He looked at me to continue the story. Aw do I have to? I felt sickeningly nervous and when I'm nervous, I tend to stutter a lot and it takes awhile to get what I want to say out.

I was going to answer to Arabella directly. I look at her. Curiosity was in her eyes. Dougie had the same face. Arabella's my best friend. And Dougie is my um...boyfriend.

"Uh...Dad here offered me a job for the summer..."I look at Arabella then Dougie then back to Arabella.

Damn I want to be with my best friend AND Dougie!

"...here." I swallow, mouth dry.

Everybody seems to sit up straight now, especially Dougie and Arabella. Oi I don't get myself- I was all for it last week! And now, as I'm going tell everybody, I can't help but think about my friends. But then at the same time, my feelings for Dougie Poynter grow everyday!

"Here? What kind?" Harry asked.

"In the studio...this one to be exact..."

"Oh." Arabella says. I look at her.

"You see, it would help me land a career with TRL back in New York." I felt dizzy.

"Well are you going do it?" Lena and Dougie ask at the same time.

"Uh...." I look at my dad. He has two thumbs up. Richard and other producers nodded in approval just because my dad did.

Tom, Danny and Harry were neutral I'm guessing.

Lena and Mina look a bit sad but want to say yes.

I see Dougie and it looks like he's trying so hard not to smile.

Yes

Then I see Arabella. She and I are like sisters. She wasn't smiling and tensely awaited my answer.

No?

Yes. No! Yes? No? OMG! uh…

"Lara?" My dad brings me back to drama land.

"Uh..."

I'm confused now. If I stay in London, the prizes would be the city, daddy dearest, cool job and a hot boyfriend who is an amazingly good kisser. If I leave London, I'll go home with my best friends and stay in the city that never sleeps full of partying and ...more partying.

Hard choice...

I thought of Dougie. First feeling towards him: Gorgeous. Good kisser on a plane.

It was deathly quiet. Like it would decide my future...ha…

Would it?

"I said....n-yes." I smile. Dougie's too much to let go.

Dougie coughs and Arabella frowns in a way like she should be happy yet can't help but be sad.

"Congratulations!" Danny, Tom, Harry...and Dougie all got up and hugged me. They all smiled and talked and Dougie secretly had trouble controlling himself.

"Thanks." I say.

The older adults above the age of 30 leave for a lunch meeting and my dad had a date with a french lady.

"Are you mad at me?" I ask nervously to Arabella as McFLY monkies around in the recording studio.

I look at Lena and Mina too.

"You'll come back for school right?" Mina asks.

"Yeah of course." I look at Arabella. She's silent.

"Oh I'm so proud of you!" Mina squeals and hugs me. Wow. I thought they would be anything but happy.

Arabella's still quiet.

"You're going to have so much fun!" Lena laughs, "Take pictures! Date! Party! Come back by fall!"

"I will." I say I look at Arabella. Her sad eyes would make any guy fall in love with her.

"Arabella say something!" I plead.

She blinks her doe eyes and smiles, "I'm so proud of you."

I'm taken aback, "Really?"

"I'm going to miss you loads but you deserve this." She said looking around her referring to the studio.

She's not mad?

Why isn't she mad?

Oh who cares!

"I'm going to miss you three so much too!" I say, feeling myself become girly and wanting to cry.
We do this big group hug that McFLY moans, "Girls!" as we help each other fix our eyeliner afterwards.

"What are your living arrangements?" Arabella asks me as we listened to McFLY sing Home is where the heart is. I lay my head on her shoulder as I draw on Lena's hand. Her eyes were transfixed on Danny who was playing the guitar and singing at the same time.

"Dad is letting me live in his second flat. But I'm leaving with you so I can grab some belongings and then head back."

"I'm really going to miss you!" Arabella says.

"I know. Me too." I say quietly.

Dougie's POV:

Is it just me or does the world seem brighter?

I lay on my bed with music blasting on the stereo. And this huge, dorky smile was plastered on my face. It won't go away!

Low and crappy were the words to describe myself the morning before Lara told everyone she was staying.

If she left, she would've beaten the death of the lizard.

RIP Larry

If Lara was actually going to leave, then I would just kiss her in front of the world before she gets on that plane.

When she had that look on her face back at the studio, I thought we were caught. But no- Now Lara's staying and I feel like the luckiest bum on earth.

"Oi loser turn the music down!" Tom said barging in.

I flopped on my bed, only in orange boxers, with one of my beloved bass guitars in my arms, making it look like I was rocking out.

Tom laughed at me as my dusty tower of old porn magazines fell on the floor and the string of my bass guitar broke and hit me in the eye.

I can't let him know that I'm the happiest bum on earth...even if my left eye is screaming murder.