I Never Meant to Start a War

I’m not entirely sure how it happened, but this is my best guess:

After the fight, Jasper didn’t know where to go, found himself hesitating in the forest. He knew he couldn’t go back to the house and work things out—he knew I wouldn’t be there when he arrived, and that sent a flash of heat through his veins that he thought would remain as cold as a December night. He raked a hand through his hair, eyes darting around.

He eventually decided on home.

The anger wouldn’t have faded by the time he reached the grand, open estate of the Cullen mansion. He more than likely stormed into the living room with too much force than he meant to, drawing the attention of those present. More than likely, it was the entire family, scattered around the same room, relishing in the relief of knowing that everyone was alive and well and the only one that was suffering was a worthless dog.

Edward, sitting at a couch with Bella, barely glanced up. They all felt the anger, but Edward didn’t listen for the thoughts in his mind—he assumed that he didn’t have to.

“Oh,” Edward remarked wryly. “So she told you.”

Jasper, halfway to the stairs, stopped suddenly. “Told me what?”

It was quiet enough to hear a pin drop. Gazes of the family members darted to one another, trying to construct the final product with only the cryptic clues they had at their disposal, to no avail. The family watched silently with calculating eyes as Edward made a face, guilty and sheepish mixed into one, along with an emotion they didn’t recognize.

But Jasper Whitlock had yet to meet an emotion he couldn’t read. And whatever that emotion was, whatever he felt, was only the fuel to the fire.

He snarled, turning around to fully face his brother.

“What are you talking about?” Jasper’s voice, normally a controlled murmur, sent shockwaves through the family. It was nothing short of murderous.

Edward rose, taking a step to his brother. “It’s not my place.”

“No,” the honey blonde Southern vampire said monotonously, eyes flashing. “She’s been keeping something from me for way too long. Whatever you have to say can be said right now.”

Still, the mind reader hesitated. It was one thing to destroy the small raven-haired girl he thought he could trust, but it was a whole other thing to destroy his brother. Jasper’s rage rolled off of him in waves as he stared down his brother of sorts—a brother he seemed willing to make tell him this secret by force. The family tensed slightly.

Bella watched, trying to stay calm. All she felt, though, was the rapid beat of her heart, and the pure rush of panic.

No one’s eyes strayed from the bronze haired brother and the blonde haired brother, caught in a long, long stare.

Jasper’s mind must have strayed to what happened prior to his entry, because Edward’s face and stance changed. His face clouded with frustration as he looked at his angry brother who just wanted an answer. He made a face.

Bella, for one, knew what was coming. She closed her eyes. Preparing for impact.

“She is making it extremely difficult to remain civil,” Edward said in a measured tone. Red flashed through his eyes. “It’s not my secret to tell, but I think it has gotten to the point that she has pushed it too far. You wondered just now about her connection to the wolves. You wondered how she can possibly sympathize with them.”

He hesitated.

“Marie has managed to keep this truth a secret for too long.”

Everyone but Bella was staring at Edward, waiting anxiously for his next words. Bella’s eyes were still shut in a feeble attempt to block out the world.

And then, he would betray me just as I had betrayed him and his family.

~*~

“I don’t know what to do,” I confessed to Emily at the same time my deepest and darkest secret was being betrayed. My hands gripped the steering wheel tightly and I blinked away the moisture that blocked my vision of the road, breathing evenly. Emily sat in the passenger seat, sitting silently and watching me carefully.

I had seen her walking on the side of the road, a plastic bag clutched in her hand and her arms tucked tightly around her in an attempt to block out the cold. When I called her over, she explained that she had to bring more medical supplies to Jacob Black’s house, where the pack was. I immediately offered her a ride, seeing as that was where I was now heading.

For a long moment, we sat in silence.

I shakily whispered, “I’m not ready to break his heart.”

I didn’t know who I was talking about, but I suppose it didn’t matter. Emily was the kind of person you could trust with anything, I had figured that out from my first moment in her home. I figured that she would at least be able to keep a small secret like this one. And, if not, I didn’t have a good enough answer as to whom anyway.

I didn’t know who.

And that scared me more than Jasper’s expression had.

She asked softly, “Are you happy, Marie?”

I laughed humorlessly, wiping under my eyes with the back of my hand. We were almost there. “Not right now, no,” I answered.

“But in general?” she pressed, glancing toward me. Her friendly expression threw me off. I had never really confided much in someone ever, and it seemed weird even now to look someone in the eye and tell them the whole truth about my feelings. I had held it in for so long.

I started to cry again. “It’s all going to change.”

She didn’t say another words, and neither did I. Too soon, we were pulling up to the small red house, and I was brushing away more tears. I sat there for a moment after Emily had gotten out, politely thanking me again for the ride. And then I turned off the car and began to move toward the small house.

Emily held the door open to me with a small smile, and I slipped in with one in return. I wondered fleetingly what I looked like.

I must have looked like someone had died, because many of the wolves stared at me as I followed Emily in. I stared into nothing, lost in my own head, where everything was perfect and everything made all the sense in the world. My head was freedom.

I was drawn out by someone saying me name. “Marie, right?”

I blinked and looked over to find Sam Uley staring at me with a monotone expression. But some kind of compassion flashed in his eyes, and he sounded completely sincere and true as he murmured to me:

“Is everything alright?”

But I knew what he cared about, and it had nothing to do with my feelings.

I held his stare for a long moment to let him know before I replied, “I’ll let you know.”

Once I had spoken, two wolves eased into the room from a hallway tucked into the side, one of them practically dragging the other one along. The wounded one groaned and growled before he opened his eyes and met my gaze—before I realized that this heavily injured werewolf was one of the men I loved.

My stomach fell down to the core of the Earth as he tried to pull away from Jared, only to nearly crash to the ground. I was over in a moment, reaching my hand toward him in yielding but not touching him for fear of hurting him. The pain broadcasted in his eyes despite all the ways he tried to hide it let me know that he wanted to act strong for me.

I gave him a look. “Don’t get ahead of yourself.”

He sacrificed a smile. He grunted, “Minor setback, sweetheart.”

I followed as Jared and another boy I knew I had met but could not recall the name of helped him to the ground, the only open seat. He winced when he went to sit up, but waved them off when they tried to force him down. I remember Jasper mentioning them dragging the silver wolf away, that he had trouble breathing. His hand reached up to touch the big purple bruise on his ribs, and I knew Jasper’s speculation was correct.

Everyone kept to their own private conversations even when I settled myself down next to him, looking at him, just looking at him. He looked at me, too, but his eyes were set to a blaze that could only be described as smoldering. My stomach twisted and turned.

I think I blushed. I know he smirked.

“Why were you crying?” he muttered softly, trying to reposition himself. I reached out and put a hand to his shoulder—he stole that hand and kept it hostage in his own. I shook my head.

“Don’t worry about it,” I whispered. “I heard about the silver wolf getting the shit kicked out of him, and I couldn’t believe it. The cocky hot-head fell down?”

Paul scowled as several of the closer werewolves burst into a round of laughter. I sent him a smile, though, and all was forgiven and forgotten.

Everything but the tears that I had long since wiped away.

I hadn’t been in the Black household for much longer than five minutes when everything was set into motion.

Our slightly tense, slightly peaceful aura was interrupted by the long shriek of a wolf howl somewhere out in the distance—urgent and fearful.

The blood leaked from Sam Uley’s face.

Before anyone could say anything, all of the werewolves in commission were flying though the door in a rush, Sam’s voice rising to howl commands in a strange language I had never before heard. Not even a second passed by before his commands were answered with frantic howls, crashing branches.

They were gone.

Silence.

It was just Paul, Emily, Kim, and I in the living room. Emily and Kim immediately rose and scampered down the hall, where I assumed Jacob was recuperating to the best a “half-dead” person could recuperate.

Before I was ready for it, Paul and I were alone.

“Say something. I need to hear your voice,” he whispered into the silence, his fingers slipping through mine. I closed my eyes and leaned closer to him, but was still too afraid to touch him. I could have rolled my eyes at his persistence, but I knew that this was what he had been yearning for a week. He had been dying for it.

I said, “Something.”

He chuckled slightly and shook his head, but when I opened my eyes to look at him, he was beaming at me. The soft, caring look in those eyes dictated the handsome features of his face. Even that smile.

This time I was sure that my face was heating up, and I cast my eyes downward.

I didn’t think I could ever spend as long of a moment as I did in nothing but pure silence.

It was until ten minutes after their departure that a wolf returned.

The door of the Black household quickly burst open to reveal Samuel Uley crossing the threshold, wearing the perfect poker face. His eyes sat on where Paul and I still sat, his face continuing its stoic resolve as he set his eyes on his pack brother. But I did spot his eyes stray to me for just a moment.

He announced to Paul into the silence, “There’s a leech at the treaty line asking for you. He says you stole his mate.”